"Dirty Little Secret"
By: Corky Castel
Main Character: Leonardo
Genre: Angst/Romance
Rating: T
Summary: Leonardo has a dirty little secret he's been keeping from his brothers. But it's quickly starting to eat away at his conscience. ::One Shot::
Disclaimer: Don't own Leo or any of the other turtles…sadly. Still wish I did though. That'd be nice.
Author's Note: PLEASE READ THIS BEFORE CONTINUING ON TO STORY!!!! This idea came to me while I was at work and it wouldn't leave me alone. I'm sorry to any of you Leo fans, but you gotta admit this would explain a lot about him sometimes. It in no way is meant as a flame towards everybody's favorite Fearless Leader. So if you love Leo…I'm sorry. Lol. With that said…here's my little one shot. Oh! Also this story is in NO WAY connected to my Mikey/Gwen trilogy. And for you keeping up with that trilogy…I might have chapter six written by late tomorrow night. Be patient and you shall receive. Enjoy!!
Leo's POV
I hate having to sneak about like this, although it is fantastic training. And you know me; I'm all about ninjitsu training. All my life I've been put on a pedestal of perfection, when in reality, I'm far from it! Always the most concentrated during practice, the serious one, the oldest…the role model for my brothers. Don't get me wrong, I am still all those things, except, if my family ever knew the truth…I don't even want to think about what it would make me look like.
Raph is only slightly younger than me and it's because of that that he constantly tries to make it a point to attempt one-upping me. It hardly works and I'm usually the one there to bail him out. We've never really gotten along, even as kids. Sensei says it's because Raph feels he's just as good as I am at things and doesn't understand why I get the praise when he doesn't. Well…I have the feeling if he knew the truth about me; he'd do everything in his powers to over take me as leader. Plus I'd never hear the end of his venomous words, or worse yet, would never speak to me again. Granted, yes, at times that would be a blessing but, you know as well as I do that it would probably be the most painful thing in my life.
Donnie, being the genius he is, has probably already found me out. It wouldn't surprise me any if he had and by the grace of whatever being is above has enough decency not to say anything about it. Of course, then again, with the way he holes himself up in his room or lab, I'd be even less surprised if he didn't know anything. No one ever knew this, but of all my brothers, Donnie is the one I love the most. When we were younger we use to go everywhere together and told each other everything. As we got older though, we grew further apart and that tore me to pieces. Of course being "Fearless Leader" I couldn't show that the gap between us bothered me any, particularly when he began spending more time with Mikey, laughing and joking like we use to when no one else was around. I suppose if Don found out, even if I somehow managed to tell him, he would brush it off and forget about it with time and never mention it again. At least, that's what I hope.
Of any of us, I suppose Mikey would be the most accepting of it. Jokester that he is, I know he's got a kind heart and an ever open mind. Not always the sharpest sheriken in the dojo, but still a good guy anyways. He never cared what people thought about him, or any of us for that matter, and always managed to make light of a heavy situation. I have an idea I know what he'd do if I told him however. He'd listen to what I had to say, then sit there for a second or two before telling me it was cool and shrug then turn the subject completely around and crack some joke about Raph or himself.
And don't even get me started on what April, Master Splinter, or worst yet Casey would have to say about it. April might be a little weirded out at first, but she's like that about a lot of things…at least until she gets used to them. Master Splinter…well…my only hope is that he doesn't hate me for who I am and disown me. I already feel so much disgrace for sneaking about and lying like I have been doing for nearly four years now, I don't think I could handle it if Sensei disowned me. And Casey…heh…let's put it this way, if he didn't kill himself trying to get away from me first, he'd probably never come near me ever again. He'd treat me like I was diseased. I'm not! It's just…who I am.
Fearless Leader? Heh, they only wish. I'm plenty scared right now. Scared that someone will find me out; scared that my brothers would hate me and stop looking to me for leadership; scared that my family would treat me differently. I was scared out of my mind that first time I was with Ally. Please don't ask how we met, that's not important; just know that I was the furthest thing FROM fearless the night we met. Oh yeah, I'm far from "fearless". With each night that I slip from my room and move like a shadow through the sewers to meet with Ally, I find myself more and more paranoid.
I know I should tell them, they're bound to find out sooner or later. Probably about the time they all manage to find a human partner to settle down with and I'm still pretending to be too much of a ninja master to waste time with something as frivolous as finding a mate. When in reality, I have. And lying here in bed, running my hand down Ally's soft straw colored hair and tan, toned back while he sleeps, makes me feel like the luckiest turtle alive. Ally doesn't care that I'm different or ridiculed by the public, because he is too. And after having spent four years of my life with him, I've learned not to listen to what others have to say. "It takes baby-steps, Leo." He's often told me as I lament about dealing with my family. "Give them time. And if they truly love you for who you are, they will accept you for WHAT you are too."
That's good advice. Advice I've been wanting to put to good use but have been too afraid to. Someday I'll tell them about Ally. They're bound to love him as much as I do! He's funny like Mikey, smart like Donnie, and can be just as big of a stubborn jackass as Raph. Someday…but until then, I'll just keep him my dirty little secret.
Author's Note PS: The name Ally is English and is unisexual. It means friend or partner. I thought it appropreate. Don't forget to review! And again, I'm sorry if I offended anyone! I didn't mean to!