I am done. Smoking gun.
We've lost it all. Our love gone.
"I knew he was a lair Clare! I always have! You shouldn't have forgiven him! "Alli said, her hands flying around.
"I know Alli! I was there! I saw it too! If I had a fucking time machine I would gladly go back and not forgive him! BUT NEWS FLASH- I can't! So just shut up!" I screamed as I slammed my locker shut.
She has won. Now it's no fun.
We've lost it all. The love is gone.
I went right to the park to study with Alli after school. We sat on a picnic bench and had books sprawled all over.
"How the hell am I supposed to understand this? It's impossible! Alli exclaimed, frustrated. I just sat there and shook my head, laughing at her expressions.
"Give me answers the pleeesssase?" she begged, fed up with the situation.
"You'll never learn it if I do it for you," I said as I solved the next equation.
"Fuck this, I can't take it!" she yelled, slamming her books shut and laughing at her short attention span afterwards.
"I'm gonna get a drink, want anything?" she asked as she got up.
"No thanks." I replied while pulling out my phone to read the text from Adam. Alli walked away, and I noticed something in the distance. I see a couple kissing on the corner near the store, no big deal. But the boy looked a lot like Eli. Ever since I caught him before, ive been a little parinoid. But I couldn't see it too well, and besides, Eli wouldn't cheat on me. Never. 'Your being ridiculous Clare. He did it once. Never again, he promised. Stop overreating.' As they started to walk down the street a little more, his arm around her waist, I could clearly see the couple a block away. Then got a phone call;
"Clare, I'm so sorry! I just saw-"I cut her off.
"Eli" I sighed. "I know."
And we had magic. And this is tragic.
You couldn't keep your hands to yourself.
He kissed me, all with passion. He looked my dead in the eyes, seriousness and honesty shining through them.
"I love you Clare."
The four words that made me smile. The four words that made me feel special. The four words that made me melt.
Who knew those little four words could mean so much to me?
Who knew those four little words were all a lie…?
Now I know you're sorry.
Yes we were sweet.
But you chose lust when you deceived me
"I can't believe you!" I yelled, feeling hatred wash over my whole body. Here we were, screaming at each other out-front of his house.
"Clare, I've said sorry! I'd do anything to take it back, but I can't! What else do you want me to do?" He yelled, coming closer to me. He held both of my hands and said sincerely,
"I love you Clare."
I started to remember how much I still loved him, and how I don't want this to end. But those stupid four words weren't about to fool me again.
"I want you to let me go home, and never talk to me again." I said flatly, feeling the tears well up in my eyes as I pushed him out of my way and ran down the street. I ignored Eli's apologies, didn't want to hear them anymore. Alli was right. A liar is a liar. If I would've left him the first time, wouldn't have to go through this again.
You'll regret it.
But it's too late. How can I ever trust you again?
I feel like our world's been infected.
And somehow you left me neglected.
I sat there on my bed, alone. I was trying my hardest to have peace by myself, but at the same time, I was craving the attention I would get if I called my best friend to come over. As I sat there, after all the crying; after all the thinking; after all the stress; I realized. I realized I don't need him.
I realized all he does is make me feel the most important person in the world, then tears me apart. I realized he really doesn't care about me at all. And with that, I pulled myself together and finally realized I didn't lose him, He lost me…
We found our lives been changed.
Babe, you lost me.