yeep, its me again:)
i wrote this as a one shot, but i can see the potential for it to be continued. if i continue it will either be a romance with embry or romance with paul. so read and enjoy. review and tell me if it should stay a one shot or if i should continue, let me know if you prefer paul or embry for the romance.

readon... slashslashslash

Life's not fair.

No, it never was for me.
I suppose your wondering who I am. Well, to answer that question, I am Leah Clearwater. Outcast everywhere I go.

Let me explain something to you. I'm not a normal 17 year old girl from la push, I just so happen to be a shape shifter. And not just any shape shifter, no, I am a freak among freaks. I am the only female shifter, in all the legends it never mentioned a female shifter, so to my pack brothers I am an outcast. I don't get treated normally, they all see me as a sour bitch- even my own brother thinks this, though he tries to hide it. To understand the reasons for this I'll have to tell my story, so here we go.

It was the week after my 16th birthday, I couldn't have been happier. I had my incredibly hot boyfriend Sam, I had my family, my annoying younger brother Seth who I wouldn't replace for the world, I had my loving mum. And best of all I had my dad, Harry Clearwater, he was everything I could ask for. He was more than my dad, he was my best friend, my protector, my rock. And to make it all better my cousin Emily was coming to the rez for the weekend to celebrate with me. It was all perfect, until Emily actually arrived.

She got to the house for lunch time on 27th march, soon to be on the list of days I would happily erase, we sat in the living room catching up. We talked for about 10 minuets until Sam walked in. he froze and Emily cut off mid sentence. I didn't know what had happened until about a month later but were not at that part yet.

Sam walked straight over to Emily, much to my dismay, took her hand and just looked into her eyes. I couldn't comprehend it, I started crying, and I knew in that moment that I had lost two of the most important people in my life. My sobs must have wrenched Sam out of whatever trance he was in. he looked at me and his eyes filled with guilt.

" Leelee, I'm sorry. We're over." No explanation, so I did the only thing I could do . I ran. I ran, blinded by my tears.

From that day I vowed I would never let another person in, I would never show my feelings, I would never feel again. Except for the deep hatred I now held for Sam and Emily, and unknown to me at the time imprinting.

The only way I got through it was my dad, he didn't let me lock myself away in my room, and he didn't let me lash out at the people I so wanted to hurt for inflicting the pain on me. No, my dad distracted me, he spent all his time with me. He took me fishing, he watched the games on the TV with me, he stayed with me at the bonfires, and he kept me from the depression. Even though he was the tribe leader he always had time for me.

But of course I never get a happy ending. Two months later my dad had a heart attack. I sat by him in the hospital, I held his hand. Every time anyone entered the room or tried to get me to leave and rest I would snarl at the. There was no way I was going to leave my dad on his own, it didn't matter that there were family and friends that could take my place, he needed me almost as much as I needed him. As I had vowed I never let the emotions that were tearing me up show, the only evidence of my emotions was how tightly I gripped his hand and the look buried deep in my eyes.

He died, my dad died. He was taken away from me. But still I never shed a single tear, I didn't spiral into depression, I didn't lash out- he would have been proud.

The funeral was 3 days later. The whole of la push and some people from forks was there, all solemnly paying respect to my dad. I sat through the whole of the ceremony, blank faced, I couldn't bring myself to give a speech. I knew if I got up there in front of all the people watching I would break down. When the time came for the casket to be lowered I watched in silence as my beloved father was lowered into the ground. I let a single tear drip down my face.

As the days passed my lack of emotion turned into sadness, I sat in my room for a week doing nothing but listening to music and replaying memories over and over again. Still I did not cry, I refused. Then it turned into anger. I was angry at myself, if id been a better daughter he wouldn't of died. I was angry at mum, I was angry at Seth. I was angry at everyone who gave me looks filled with pity. And most of all I was angry with Sam and Emily. Even though my dad had just died they continued there blissful romance, acting as if it never happened. I wanted to lash out and hurt them but I couldn't bring myself to face them. Not yet.

I finally mustered up the courage to face them, not just because of my hatred for them. Sam was up to something, he had been for months, and Seth had now started hanging around with him. Just like everyone else did… Jared,Paul,Quil,Embry,Jake and the rest. Now that it happened to Seth, I had to find out. How I wished I hadn't though.

flashback

I stormed down the stairs, I had just watched Seth leave the house to meet Sam again. Id had enough, was it not enough that id had Sam, Emily and my dad taken off me , now I had to lose Seth too? No, I would fix this. It was raining, when was it not? But I didn't bother about that . I ran down the street and took the shortcut I had known so well to Sam's house. It took me all of five minuets, not enough time to convince myself what a mistake I was making. I didn't bother knocking on the door, I just walked in. They were all there, they turned and looked at me. I looked around and saw Emily, the evil bitch, sitting on Sam's lap. I was quickly losing my temper. Seth sat on one of the sofas in-between Jared and Paul. Embry, quill and Jacob sat on the other while Colin and Brady sat on the floor. I was the first to speak.

" What the fuck is going on?" I demanded, I don't know why but I started shaking, my body began to feel hot.

"Leah, calm down," Sam must have noticed the shaking.

" No, I want to know what your problem is. What is wrong with all of you? You've all changed." It was true , in about a week they had all changed, they got taller, and they got muscles. When I say muscles I don't just mean muscles I mean as if they are on steroids. This amongst all other weird things going on with them had finally caused me to snap.

" What problem? We don't have a problem, seems to me it's you who has the problem. You're insane." Paul snapped.

That was is.

I was shaking uncontrollably by now, you would think that Sam and the others would have realised what was happening but they never expected what happened next.

I felt a scorching heat shoot up my legs and back, I was on fire. I heard my bones crunch. What was happening. All this happened in less than a second but I went through the whole thing in slow motion. My clothes tore into millions of shreds and I seemingly exploded to. In retrospect I knew I had not exploded because I was alive and seemingly unharmed. I looked up to see all the guys looking at me, with horror in their eyes. What is their problem?

I went to ask them but all that came out was a growl. Wait, what?

I looked down and all I could see were two grey paws. Paws. I couldn't help it, I howled, I howled a long and ear-splitting howl that showed the emotional pain I was going through.

"Holy shit!" came from Paul. I expected that.
"What the fuck?" was from Jake, expected that too.

What I didn't expect was what came from Sam. " She's female, she can't be one of us. It never said in the legends that a female could change." What the actual fuck is he talking about, he thinks he's a wolf now to. This is clearly just some fucked up dream.

So I did what any rational person/ were wolf would do in this situation. I turned around and bit my tail. No, I didn't wake up. All that I accomplished was a mouthful of fur and a sore tail.

Please god, don't let this be real. I looked back up at everyone. They had calmed down considerably by now. Sam, clearly the leader, started talking to me. I was having none of it, not off him.

I started snarling and snapping, but all that accomplished was a pissed off Sam. He started shaking to, but controlled himself.

"Listen Leah, your not the only one, all of us are shape shifters too. The legends are true. You shouldn't have changed, there aren't supposed to be female shifters. But you are so we'll just have to get used to it. " He went on to explain it all, the mind link when were in wolf form, the transformation, the pack, and the cold ones and finally imprinting.

I was pretty calm until he used him and Emily as the example. He told me that was what happened that day, as soon as he saw her he knew she was his soul mate. He told me it wasn't his fault that he had to break up with me, at that part I lost it. The ignorant bastard, of course it was his fault, he wasn't even sorry. So I lunged for his throat, I didn't quite make it, I was grabbed by 2 pairs of hands. But I did manage to claw his chest. I had the satisfaction of watching him bleed.

before you think I'm a psychotic freak, I'm not I just got some piece out of him being hurt, it wasn't the same kind of pain but it was still related to what I went through.

End flashback

I never could get to grips with the fact that Sam was alpha, him being in charge of me after everything he put me through. The fact that he knew my every thought, he knew the pain he caused me. I was over him, I just couldn't forget what he did to me.

Were finally at the part of why they think I am a sour bitch.

I never have particularly happy thoughts, whenever I phase I am reminded of Sam, and that makes me relive my memories, my hurt and I get mad. The guys think I do it on purpose to make everyone miserable. They're wrong, I make myself miserable and I would rather not, but I can't control it. I'm misunderstood, that's why they see me the way they do.

After all, life's not fair.

so youve read it . what did you think? review and let me know.
review and tell me whether it should be a one shot or should i contunue it, if i should continue it with who? paul or embry? give me your ideas

yours

slashslashslash :)