You can't always get what you want; but if you try sometimes, then you just might find, you get what you need.
So this is really different from the stuff I usually write, and I hope it's not rubbish! :) it's multi chapter, not sure how many at the moment. This chapter is short because I can't think of a better place to end it. Chapters will be longer in future.
Disclaimer: I don't own Glee, but that'd be so cool if I did.
P.S Reviews are lovely (:
Kurt took a deep breath and forced his gaze away from Finn Hudson and his perfect face, his perfect hair, his perfect body incased in the simple shirt and jeans. He closed his eyes, and when he opened them, Finn had wandered down the hall, his best friend Noah Puckerman sauntering along easily beside him. He had never told anyone how he felt about Finn, how he lay in bed at night and longed, ached to hold Finn close to him. Kurt wasn't naïve enough to believe he was in love with Finn Hudson; never. He knew deep down that because Finn was one of the few guys at school who treated him with any respect he had grown attached to him; the truth was, Kurt was lonely. He was seventeen, he had never been kissed, and he ached for someone to love him, someone to hold him at night when he was lonely, someone who would be there for him, no matter what. He wanted all of those things, and because Finn and Kurt were friendly through Glee club, Kurt had begun to develop feelings for Hudson; feelings that Kurt knew Finn would never be able to reciprocate. Kurt slammed his locker door shut and walked down the hall and towards his car. He rubbed a smear off the driver's door and got in, placing his book bag on the passenger seat and putting the car into drive, heading home.
Kurt had known he was gay since he turned thirteen, and had been bullied for it since he was five; it would never have occurred to him to change anything about himself; he loved who he was and if people didn't like that they could get lost, after all one day they would be working for him. But though Kurt could sacrifice getting through the school day without being dumpster tossed or slushied or shoved, he didn't honestly know if he could sacrifice that feeling that he was missing; that feeling of young love, like when Tina looked at Artie, or when Brittany looked at any guy, or even when Will looked at Emma. His heart literally broke every time he saw two people together at McKinley, whether they be hugging, making out or just talking, one hand entwined casually in each others. He was the only outwardly gay kid at McKinley, and he knew he wouldn't find anyone in the town who was as brave as he; a boy who would adore him despite his imperfections, who wouldn't mind walking down the hall and holding hands with another guy. Kurt realised, as he walked through his front door and down to his basement, saying hi to his dad (his favourite person in the world) if he wanted to feel love and to love, he wouldn't be able to do it with another guy. At least not for now.