Mario Fights His Enemies
It was a good day in the Mushroom Kingdom, and the Toads were happy. Suddenly Bowser appears and murders and the innocent Toads. Luigi appeared and saw Bowser killing Toads.
"That evil Koopa King is murdering poor Toads! I must stop him!" said Luigi.
Luigi confronts Bowser, and Luigi tries to attack Bowser, but Bowser sticks his arm through Luigi's body, and makes a hole on Luigi's body. "Damn…you…Koopa!" said Luigi. Luigi falls onto the ground, and bleeds to death. Bowser left the field.
Mario walks onto the field and saw a bloody mess of dead Toads lying around, along with Luigi dying. Mario ran towards Luigi and said, "Luigi, who did this bloody mess?"
"It was…Bowser…Mario…He is…such…a…murderer…" and then Luigi died.
"Luigi, I will avenge you and the Toads." said Mario. Mario puts on his headband and gets SERIOUS! Mario goes all over the Mushroom Kingdom to find Bowser, and he found Bowser, eating Goombas for breakfast. "Bowser, you shall die!" said Mario.
"Bwahaha, I am the great Bowser who murdered many Toads and your brother. You can't defeat me!" said Bowser.
"I am stronger than the Toads and Luigi, and it is my destiny to put an end to you, Bowser!" said Mario.
And so Bowser and Mario challenge each other to an epic battle to the death. Mario fights Bowser with Kung Fu fighting. His kicks are fast as lightning. They're a little bit frightening, but he fought with expert timing. Bowser then scratched Mario with his claws several times, but it's just a scratch. Then Bowser did the body slam move from Smash Bros., but there are no pits, so no Bowsercide. Then Mario performed the Shoryuken and knocked Bowser into the air.
"You must defeat Sheng Long to stand a chance, BITCH!" said Mario. As Bowser is about to fall onto the ground, Mario takes the palms of his hands, and starts charging something magical.
"Shinku…HADOUKEN!" Mario shouted as he shot a huge lazor thing at Bowser. Bowser got hit by the Shinku Hadouken. Bowser has been blown into a million pieces and dies.
"Bowser is now the dead! Luigi and Toads have been avenged!" said Mario as he does a victory pose.
Later, Mario came to Peach's castle, and had hot sex with Peach. "Wow Mario, that was some good sexing!" said Peach.
"I'm a plumber sex god!" said Mario. Then Mario and Peach heard some noises. "I better check what that noise was." said Mario.
Mario goes down stairs to find a bunch of Toads dead, and the room is covered in blood. Then Mario found a note and read the note.
Dear Mario
You are a fat ass plumber who's WAY slower than me. You don't deserve to have a hot princess nor have sex with her. I am a BIGGER winner than you are, and I deserve to get hot chicks and sex better than you do, you fat ass. Go suck your dick in hell, and never come back, you fat shitty ass plumber faggot.
From Sonic the Hedgehog
P.S. I have kidnapped Princess Peach while you are reading this. Killing the Toads was just a distraction.
Mario turns around and saw Sonic carrying Princess Peach. Sonic gave Mario the middle finger and ran off. Knowing that Sonic is faster than Mario, Mario needed something to catch up with Sonic. Then a light bulb appeared above Mario's head. Mario knew what to do. Mario sneaks into Captain Falcon's garage, and steals the Blue Falcon.
Sonic is running fast while carrying Princess Peach. Mario is catching up while driving the Blue Falcon. "That shitty ass plumber thinks he can catch up to me by driving a stupid looking car? What a loser!" said Sonic. But then Mario opens the lid on the Blue Falcon, and snatches Peach from Sonic.
"You fuck hole! That's my fucking bitch!" said Sonic. Mario ran over Sonic with the Blue Falcon. Sonic is flatten, but Sonic is still alive, and he gets up while still flat. "It will take more than flattening me to killing me!" said Sonic.
Mario then jumped out of the Blue Falcon, and is about to deliver a punch to Sonic. "MARIO…PAWNCH!" Mario shouted as he punched Sonic in the face REAL DAMN HARD! Sonic's head asploded, and Sonic died. "A winner is a me, Mario!" said Mario.
Then Captain Falcon showed up, and he is REALLY ANGERY! "Mario, you damn plumber thief! You stole my Blue Falcon! Now I must punish you!" said Captain Falcon. Captain Falcon hits Mario in the face REAL HARD with the KNEE OF JUSTICE! Mario is sent into outer space, hitting the sun, and Mario dies.
"Wow Captain Falcon, you are so awesome and manly!" said Peach.
"Show me your boobs!" said Captain Falcon. And so Peach showed Captain Falcon her boobs. Captain Falcon shouted, "HYEZ!" and then Peach and Captain Falcon had hot sex.
THE END!