This is my very first fan fiction! I love Scandal, but haven't been thrilled with the direction of the show since Olivia's kidnapping ordeal was over, this is how I was hoping it would go. Of course these characters don't belong to me. Thanks for reading!
It only weighed a few ounces, but as the ring hit his chest and fell to the floor, it felt like he had been hit with the force of a ton of bricks. He knew she had been through a horrific experience, and he knew she would need to process her kidnapping in her own way. But, he hadn't expected this. It took him a minute to swallow the lump in his throat and compose himself. He couldn't be the one to break down, not in front of her. He needed to be there for her. He needed to be strong.
Fitz sighed, bent down and picked the ring off the dark wood floor, gripping it tightly in his sweaty palm. Looking into her eyes, trying to reach his Liv, his sweet baby, Fitz was searching of a sign of what to do next. His mouth was dry, and he had to clear his throat before speaking.
But before he could say anything, Olivia was opening her door, motioning for him to leave. Though he was trying his best to be a calming influence for Olivia, inside Fitz was panicking. He didn't know what to do; should he leave as she was asking? Or should he stay, because every fiber of his being was telling him that was what they both needed.
As much of an ordeal Olivia had been through, Fitz had been through his own traumatic experience, and the thought of leaving Olivia in her apartment alone, terrified him. She had garnered interest from terror organizations around the world. She had escaped one, but that didn't mean the others would give up. He couldn't just leave here alone, in her apartment where she had already been taken from once. But she clearly wanted her space, and in that moment, Fitz wanted to give Olivia what she wanted.
He slowly made his way to the door, and tried to process the last few minutes. She was angry with him for not being the president she wanted him to be, for being weak and not making a sacrifice for the good of the country, even if that came at the cost of her life. Fitz understood that. Olivia had always had a hard time separating Fitz the president and Fitz, the man who loved her more than anything.
Fitz the president was a pillar, a monument, a statue to be looked up to, a President who would fiercely lead the country, doing what was right for the nation, no matter the cost. Fitz the man just wanted to be with the woman he loved. He wanted to go to bed and night without his arms feeling empty. He wanted to run away from his responsibilities and live quietly in Vermont. His first priority as Fitz, just Fitz, was happiness, for those he cared about and for himself, not accomplishments and sacrifices for the greater good. When Olivia had been taken she expected him to be a president, and instead all he could be was just a man in love.
He shuffled out of Olivia's apartment and into the hall. As the door closed behind him, Fitz fell to the floor, his back against the door, he's knees bent. There were at least five agents surrounding him, but in that moment he felt more alone than ever. He opened his hand and stared down at the piece of gold, the symbol of their love. As far as Fitz knew, this was the first time it had left her index finger since the day he had given it to her.
She was wearing it the day Cyrus brought her to Camp David to handle the Amanda Tanner situation, even though it had been two years since he had seen her. She was wearing it the day in the woods they argued over Artie Hornbacker and the security of the country. She was wearing it that day in the church when Ella was Christened. She was wearing it in the bunker when he, Olivia, and Mellie came up with a plan to cover her being outed as his mistress. She was always wearing it, no matter how difficult things got. Until today.
His mind raced back to the day he picked out the ring. They had been at a campaign stop in Florida, trying desperately to win the critical swing state. The outdoor event was held at a park in Tampa, and just before Fitz was to speak, the skies opened up for a typical Florida afternoon shower. But the people had come to hear him speak, and Fitz wasn't going to let them down. So, he gave his speech anyway, rallying his supporters all while getting drenched in the pouring down rain. Cyrus had stayed behind at the hotel, choosing to forgo the rough weather and instead make last minute arrangements for their next stop in Orlando. But, Olivia was never far from a campaign speech, always watching in the shadows, rain or shine. She stood behind him, smiling, clapping and supporting her candidate.
When they got back to the limo, Olivia began to use some towels that had been left for them to dry off. Olivia felt like a drowned rat, but to Fitz she looked radiant. He couldn't stop starring at her. They didn't often have the opportunity to be alone together in the limo, they sat in silence holding hands until Olivia let go and began rummaging through her bag for her notes. Fitz sighed, knowing Olivia was switching back to campaign mode. Fitz was disappointed, he had so hoped he could just relax in a rare moment with the woman he adored. Trying not to let it get to him, he tried to focus on her notes and the campaign.
When they arrived back at the hotel, they had a few hours free before the gala, where they would be dressing in very uncomfortable fancy clothes, eating overpriced food and begging millionaires to support Grant for president. He would have no choice but to spend the evening being Fitz the candidate.
But that was a few hours from now, and Fitz wanted to just be Fitz until then. As the two entered the elevator Fitz whispered to Olivia, "You are the most beautiful woman I have ever seen, spend the afternoon with me. We can do anything you want. I just want to be with you." Looking into Olivia's brown eyes, he tried to read them for an answer. He quickly added "please", and begged her with his best puppy dog eyes. Olivia relented.
Fitz went back to his room and changed into jeans and a yellow polo shirt. He wanted to be conformable before he had to put on his stuffy suit and tie and uncomfortable shoes. He wandered back down the hall, his socks making no noise against the grey carpet of the Hilton's hallway. Fitz took one last look to make sure the hall was empty, and knocked. The hall had been completely silent, making his knocking seem twenty times louder. Olivia answered the door in her grey sweat pants and black spaghetti strapped tank top. He loved seeing her in casual clothes. There was something so comforting about it. It was normal. Something couples might wear at home on a lazy Sunday while watching movies.
The two ordered room service, though Fitz hid in the bathroom when they came to drop off the food, as to not be seen. They talked and laughed about the days events, while sitting Indian style on the king sized bed together, eating french fries and chocolate cake, per Olivia's request. When they decided it was time to get ready for the gala, Fitz asked for just one more minute, and Olivia obliged. She never denied him a one minute moment.
Fitz sat up with his back against the plush headboard and Olivia scooted into him, their fingers intertwined. Fitz placed a kiss on Olivia's temple and closed his eyes. If only this were his life. If only he could stay right here forever. He felt Olivia's finger brushing over his wedding ring in a back and forth motion. He felt a twinge, he should have taken it off. He tried to remember to remove it when he was around her. She didn't need that reminder. "I'm sorry," he whispered.
Olivia didn't look up. Quietly she replied "it's ok Fitz. Even when you take it off, it's not like I forget that you're married. It's just hard to know that isn't my ring- OUR ring, that you're wearing".
Fitz's heart dropped to his stomach. Olivia had never said anything like that before. He was always up front with her about his feelings. Ever since the night on the bus when he uttered the words "what kind of coward was I, to marry her, and not wait for you to show up", he had been blunt about his intent to marry her someday, but she was always reluctant. She talked about how they would stop when he was elected, how this couldn't last forever, how he could never actually be hers.
Tears stung his eyes, and all he could muster was a 'Someday'. After their minute was up, Olivia walked Fitz to her door, And he kissed the top of her head before wandering back down the hallway to prepare for the gala.
That night as he want to bed, all he could think about was Olivia's words: 'our ring', and how much he wanted Olivia to have something special from him. he made a decision that night. Not only did he want her to have something, but she needed to have something.
The next morning, with a little help from Cyrus, he was able to sneak off to Tiffany's before they opened to pick something out, and he knew the simple gold ring was perfect the second he saw it. Fitz was aware everyone would assume it was a gift for Mellie, but he didn't care. He knew the truth, and he needed a place holder until he could get Olivia a diamond ring, something he could run his finger over when he was holding her hand to know that they would always have a deep connection, a symbol of their love the whole world could see, even if they had to hide their relationship. He knew he was in love with her and when she was ready to admit she was in love with him, he would be ready with this ring, THEIR ring, to give her.
And now he sat outside her door, six years later with the ring in his hand. He would never have imagined in six years he wouldn't have the chance to replace the gold ring with a diamond engagement ring. He brought his head into his lap and began to sob. He had no idea how they had gotten here.