Disclaimer: For my own ass, Squaresoft owns everything associated with FFX, including the characters, blah, blah, blah, Yo-Yo Ma, blah, blah, blah, Enron, etc.
Intro: Yuna just sent Auron to the Farplanes right after their big, easy battle with Yevon. Afterwards, Tidus jumps from the sky into the Farplanes after giving Yuna a hug. Five days later, Yuna checks herself into The Bevelle Hospital for the Mentally Ill, where she dies of a drug overdose. But let's get on with the story.
Auron finds himself in a land surrounded by light. Bright lights. Could it be? Yes, it was. It was the Farplanes. Auron had finally been sent. For the first time in a long while, he cracks a smile, as he ascends a hill, only to black out once he reached the top of the hill.
***
Auron: (Wakes up) What the hell? Where am I?
Braska: (Appears before Auron) You are in...well, I cannot say it is a majestic place.
Auron: Braska! I missed you so much. How is...Jecht doing?
Jecht: Doin' fine and dandy, thank you very much.
Auron: Jecht! Yes! Thank Yevon's dead ass I reached the Farplanes.
Jecht: Well....
Braska: These aren't the Farplanes.
Auron: ...
Braska: This is...
Jecht: Hell
Auron: ...interesting.
Braska: Yes, this is Hell, better known as Marlon Brando's ass.
Auron: AHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!
Jecht: Calm down, it's not as bad as you think.
Auron: Is this why my feet is soaked in a pool of green fat? ::Looks down at a pool of fat::
Braska: Yes, pretty much.
Jecht: What the hell? Look over there.
Out of a pool of fat comes Tidus.
Tidus: Hiya.
Jecht: Crap, it has to be my daughter...
Braska: Hello.
Auron: Aw, fuck you, Yevon.
Tidus: (Goes up to Auron) Hi, hot stuff. (Blushes)
Auron: Uhh....
Braska: Oh-ho-ho, Auron, I see you found your lover.
Auron: My lover? Tidus? No, it was that Al Bhed slut.
Braska: Yeah, I had an Al Bhed slut too, and then she had to crap out Yuna...
Jecht: Look at what my bitch crapped out (Points at Tidus)
Tidus: Shut up! (Cries and runs away)
Auron: Tidus, wait!
Auron goes and chases Tidus, only to stumble into the middle of a card game. He runs straight into the table, flipping over all the poker chips and cards lying on the table.
Auron: Ouch! Oomph! Bazam!
Auron lies there for a few minutes and looks up at the card players.
Auron: Yu Yevon! Mika! Seymour! Osama bin Laden!
Osama bin Laden: Sup?
Seymour: So, you show up.
Yu Yevon: I will smite you with my godly powers!
Osama: I will get him. (Calls for an airplane to crash into Auron)
Auron, still hurt from crashing into the card table, sees an airplane in the sky heading right towards him. Auron cannot move. All of a sudden, Tidus jumps in front of Auron.
Tidus: We shall die together, my love.
Auron, meanwhile, has already gotten up and out of the way of the airplane. The airplane crashes into Tidus. Tidus is never heard from again.
Jecht: Hey, wanna go get a beer?
Auron: Sure.
The Happy End.
Author's notes: Thanks for reading the story. Hope you enjoyed it. I'm just here to tell you to watch out for this one rapist called Americo. He lives in Texas, and his fetish is little girls. Please, if you find this man, eliminate him right away, so we would not have to deal with him. He goes by the online name of Shitman, so be careful. His AOL screen name, I hear, is Aco218. So ignore all messages from Aco218. Feel free to send him viruses and hate mail. His e-mail, I think, is Aco218@aol.com.
Intro: Yuna just sent Auron to the Farplanes right after their big, easy battle with Yevon. Afterwards, Tidus jumps from the sky into the Farplanes after giving Yuna a hug. Five days later, Yuna checks herself into The Bevelle Hospital for the Mentally Ill, where she dies of a drug overdose. But let's get on with the story.
Auron finds himself in a land surrounded by light. Bright lights. Could it be? Yes, it was. It was the Farplanes. Auron had finally been sent. For the first time in a long while, he cracks a smile, as he ascends a hill, only to black out once he reached the top of the hill.
***
Auron: (Wakes up) What the hell? Where am I?
Braska: (Appears before Auron) You are in...well, I cannot say it is a majestic place.
Auron: Braska! I missed you so much. How is...Jecht doing?
Jecht: Doin' fine and dandy, thank you very much.
Auron: Jecht! Yes! Thank Yevon's dead ass I reached the Farplanes.
Jecht: Well....
Braska: These aren't the Farplanes.
Auron: ...
Braska: This is...
Jecht: Hell
Auron: ...interesting.
Braska: Yes, this is Hell, better known as Marlon Brando's ass.
Auron: AHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!
Jecht: Calm down, it's not as bad as you think.
Auron: Is this why my feet is soaked in a pool of green fat? ::Looks down at a pool of fat::
Braska: Yes, pretty much.
Jecht: What the hell? Look over there.
Out of a pool of fat comes Tidus.
Tidus: Hiya.
Jecht: Crap, it has to be my daughter...
Braska: Hello.
Auron: Aw, fuck you, Yevon.
Tidus: (Goes up to Auron) Hi, hot stuff. (Blushes)
Auron: Uhh....
Braska: Oh-ho-ho, Auron, I see you found your lover.
Auron: My lover? Tidus? No, it was that Al Bhed slut.
Braska: Yeah, I had an Al Bhed slut too, and then she had to crap out Yuna...
Jecht: Look at what my bitch crapped out (Points at Tidus)
Tidus: Shut up! (Cries and runs away)
Auron: Tidus, wait!
Auron goes and chases Tidus, only to stumble into the middle of a card game. He runs straight into the table, flipping over all the poker chips and cards lying on the table.
Auron: Ouch! Oomph! Bazam!
Auron lies there for a few minutes and looks up at the card players.
Auron: Yu Yevon! Mika! Seymour! Osama bin Laden!
Osama bin Laden: Sup?
Seymour: So, you show up.
Yu Yevon: I will smite you with my godly powers!
Osama: I will get him. (Calls for an airplane to crash into Auron)
Auron, still hurt from crashing into the card table, sees an airplane in the sky heading right towards him. Auron cannot move. All of a sudden, Tidus jumps in front of Auron.
Tidus: We shall die together, my love.
Auron, meanwhile, has already gotten up and out of the way of the airplane. The airplane crashes into Tidus. Tidus is never heard from again.
Jecht: Hey, wanna go get a beer?
Auron: Sure.
The Happy End.
Author's notes: Thanks for reading the story. Hope you enjoyed it. I'm just here to tell you to watch out for this one rapist called Americo. He lives in Texas, and his fetish is little girls. Please, if you find this man, eliminate him right away, so we would not have to deal with him. He goes by the online name of Shitman, so be careful. His AOL screen name, I hear, is Aco218. So ignore all messages from Aco218. Feel free to send him viruses and hate mail. His e-mail, I think, is Aco218@aol.com.