Disclaimer: I don't own any of these characters. I do own Fenton Baser
though!


'Twas the night before Christmas, and all throught my room
Not a creature was stirring in the midnight gloom
My stomach was filled full of eggnog of course
But my spirit was full of pain and remorse

My appartment was tidy, I'd cleaned it with care
But what did it matter, with no one to share?
So I sat in my longjohns, so baggy and bright
Sat myself down for a long winters night

When deep in the hearth the flames sputtered and spattered
I tilted my head to see what was the matter
I blinked and I stared, disbelief filled my face
And the next thing I knew, my heart started to race

For out of the darkness there arouse such a sight
A flat foot emerging, his hair spikey and light
He was dirty and dusty, but unscathed by the fire
I took just one look, and was filled with desire

Then he laughed and muttered and brushed his clothes clean
With fingers so graceful, his body so lean
His short hair was yellow, not greasy or slick
And I knew in a moment it wasn't St. Nick

I found myself gazing, and I started to sway
I could not believe it, he looked just like dear Ray
He was dressed all in black, from his toes to his head
And I hoped in an instant we'd soon be in bed

Then rapidly out of those sweet lips there fell
A whole string of curses, "My God, this is hell!
"Damn Thatcher, damn Turnball, damn that Hewey and Dewey
"Damn Frannie, Damn Welsh, could the act any more screwy?

"We all should be putting bad guys in herses
"Instead we are sitting and singing holiday verses
"The inane Christmas cheer, it's humbug I say!
"So I've left the precint, I'm on holiday!"


Then he smiled and muttered
And shook his blonde head
"C'mon Benton-buddy,
"Let's get into bed!"

The next morning found me alone and bereft
For when I had wakened, he'd already left
But under the tree there were gifts wrapped with tape
And on all the tags were the words, "Love from Ray."

I opened my parcels and gifts in a trice
The presents he'd left me were really quite nice
But allow me to say, and I hope I'm not bragging
The best gift of all was my Chi-ca-go shagging!


A/N Well, there's my wonderful Christmas poem. I hope you guys liked it. And don't forget, I love feedback!