"Marriage is an adventure...like going to war!"

- G. K. Chesterton

"Neh, neh, what's your and Sakura's first dance gonna be to?" Naruto nudged Sasuke, the groom-to-be of the ever surprising Sakura Haruno. Surprising meaning that she proposed the two (Sasuke and herself) to just get married already since Sasuke was too much of a self-loathing pansy to buy her an engagement ring and ask himself. After all, she wore the pants didn't she? She might as well pull all of the weight around, including that of their unborn child which the two just found out they were having. And yet Sasuke still didn't have the brains to propose. They were likely to have a bastard spawn had it not been for Sakura's initiative. And those were her exact words.

As if Sasuke was so useless around the house! In his defense, he was always away on missions. Apparently, A-N-B-U meant nothing to Sakura. Apparently. But that's beside the point; what matters now is finding a good song for their first dance as a married couple. It was a task Sakura found to be simple enough even for a simpleton (which he always said he was not, and he backed up this statement with his Anbu achievements) like the Uchiha to be able to accomplish. Really, he was thinking that he should start standing up for him and his intelligence, which was undoubtedly present (in his opinion). He was the number one rookie of their year all those years ago. And one mustn't forget that there can only be one number one rookie of the year for each year. And, in case anyone had forgotten, he was in the Anbu. That counts for something right?

"I don't know," he finally responded. And he really didn't. He wasn't one for the soft cheesy songs that were always the obvious choices for the infamous dances. And he didn't want to get anything too explicit or overbearing, either. He had a feeling a song like that wouldn't bode too well with Sakura's folks.

"Hey, at least you only have to worry about pleasing one set of parents!"

"Get out of here, Sai." And thus, Sai left. How he even got into his and Sakura's house, he didn't even want to know. Of course, he was invited to the wedding, much to the annoyance of Sasuke. But he couldn't help it if Sakura had grown a tasteless and utterly distorted friendship with the socially retarded and tactless Sai. Though, coming to his defense only for the joy of pissing Sasuke off, Kakashi would go into a speech on how Sakura was currently in a tasteless and utterly distorted intimate relationship with a socially retarded and tactless man named Sasuke (I assume you know of him, he'd say). And that everything bad in a platonic friendship with Sai would be magnifed by 10 times, plus, when one adds in the fact that it's Sasuke rather than Sai, well, that just says it all. After all, Sasuke is an Uchiha and everyone know's Uchihas are crazy to some degree, most likely from all of the hairspray fumes, Kakashi would reason. Becuase one isn't just born with hair like theirs. And Kakashi would know, since his hair took an average of three hours to do each and every morning. And people wondered why he was always late.

"Maybe you should get this one!" Naruto pointed to the computer screen. As the best man, Naruto took it upon himself to assist in the menial task of finding a song for his two to-be-wed friends, which Sasuke found quite humiliating. Sasuke would then protest that he could do something this easy by himself because, in case he'd forgotten, Sasuke was an Uchiha in the Anbu and Uchiha can do things by themselves. Especially if they are in the Anbu.Yet, clearly, Sasuke just proved to Naruto and anyone else eavesdropping in a ninja-like fashion (because they were ninja) that he couldn't find a measly song by himself because he couldn't even come up with a valid reason as to why he can do it by himself without pointing out the fact that he was in the Anbu, which was used so many times that it has now long since lost it's value. Therefore, he needed help, which Naruto was nice enough to loan his best friend. Yes, loan. He was going to get this favor (however unwanted) returned, and it was going to be in the form of ramen. And lots of it.

Sasuke looked at the song Naruto was pointing to. "No," he deadpanned. If he chose that song to be played at his and Sakura's first dance...

Well...

There would be blood.

"Aw, come on. We all know you and Sakura had sex for the first time to this song!" Naruto punched Sasuke in the shoulder good-heartedly. "It has some good memories attached to it!"

Good memories indeed.

...

Not. Said 'good' memories included inconceivable amounts of alcohol, acid, Rock Lee sans the jumpsuit, bondage toys, ice cubes, candle wax, and finally, Gaara's sand gourd. Needless to say, the event would have been long forgotten thanks to all of the alcohol consumption...

But Naruto just had to have the wild urge to play directer and film the whole thing in all of his idiotic sobriety.

So Sakura and Sasuke were forced to relive that experience every single year on their First-Had-Sex-Together anniversary. Obviously, Sakura destroyed the copy shortly after it being shown to her, but that conniving little Uzumaki had made hundreds of them and he even went so far as to use the tape as blackmail. Like, seriously, what a freaking jerk.

"If we play that song, I'd die, and you'd possibly be severely injured," pointed out Sasuke in a non-pointing-out manner, since he was an Uchiha and and all. Yeah, they don't blatantly point things out. He leaned back in his seat surveying the list of songs that were presently present on the screen. "Scroll," he ordered Naruto.

"Pah, fine, fine. But don't even think I'm your lapdog or anything. This scrolling business is a one-time deal, okay?"

"Idiot, Sakura and I are only gonna be married once, anyway," spat Sasuke.

And then there was silence.

"Awe, what a cute little statement! Especially coming from your mouth, Sasuke!" Sasuke facepalmed his...er...face and whipped his head around dramatically, with a glare in place, towards the newcomer, Kakashi. The man had decided to pop his head right into the room the boys were currently occupying through their window, regardless of the fact that the window was reinforced with dual-sided eveything-destructive proof glass. Of course, Kakashi used to be in Anbu, so any effectiveness that glass ever had was now invalid thanks to Kakashi's aura of ex-Anbuness.

"I know! Why don't you try looking underneath the underneath!" said Kakashi in his 'teacher's voice.' He leaned on the sill of the window frame with his forearms and looked expectantly at the two boys. "I'm sure she'd hinted at something when she gave you this mission."

"This isn't a mission, dumbass."

"Oy, sensei, what in the hell are you standing on?" Naruto wheeled around to face Kakashi on his wheeley chair (he'd called dibs on it first) and looked at the man in a confuzzled and inquiring manner.

Kakashi's mask widened a fraction from his smile. "Nothing!" he chirped. Yeah, he was awesome.

Suddenly, their attention was directed elsewhere when Sakura's 'mom voice' sailed through and up the stairs and into the room. "Sasuke Charles! I know you're not doing anything constructive in that room so I took the liberty of asking Tsunade to make this a real mission. It's an A rank, because I know how stupid you are about the damned ranks, but if you DON'T do this correctly, you WILL pay. Literally."

Her voice was followed by a slammed door, signalling her leave. Sasuke slammed his forehead on the wall.

"Godammit!"

"I told you it was a mission!"

"Shut up."

I assume there's gonna be a part two? But I kinda like it ending right here. Ngeh, I'll just go with it :)

So, I'm really into SasuSaku right now...hahaha. I kinda love that pairing almost as much as SasuNaru, yay. All right, so yeah. The usual, leave reviews and stuff! They make me giggle.

Cheers