"It feels great to be the ruler of the world, yes?" Voldemort asked Harry.
"Oh, sure. I mean, yeah it's great but..."
"But?"
"But," Harry repeated, "I just got a letter from Hermione."
"That mudblood you used to be friends with years ago during shool?" Voldemort asked as he sorted through various Death Eater reports. Who knew ruling the world would require so much paper?
"Yeah, her. I haven't opened it, and I'm debating with myself if I should read it or not."
"Burn it," was Voldemort's immediate response. "Now that you've gained power and prestige she wants to come crawling back to you. Chances are she's broken up with her blood traitor Weasley."
"But this is Hermione! She would never do that..."
Voldemort craned his neck over the piles of paper scattered around his desk, glaring at Harry, who was sitting on the chair usually reserved for Important People.
"I know what I'm talking about, Potter. Why must you insist on questioning me at every turn?"
"It's in my blood," Harry joked. He wasn't really putting much effort into the banter, however. His thoughts were circling around Hermione and what her letter might mean. Did she really want to crawl back to him? Did she just want to catch up after the years of silence? What was in the letter?
Harry stared at the envelope in her hand. It wasn't thick, so he assumed Hermione had written to him using muggle paper.
"You know what? I'm going to read it." Harry started to rip open the envelope, but stopped when his alarm went off. Time for his break.
"Can you grab me a cookie? A chocloate chip one. Not one of those disgusting green ones Crabbe brought today." Voldemort called over the papers, immediately returning to his work after his request.
"Yeah, yeah."
...
"- and we could really use your troops to stamp down on the Rebels. All we need-" the boring man continued to talk. Harry and Voldemort were in an Important Meeting. The General, the man who was talking endlessly, was from a small city in the Outer Reaches. Harry was bored.
"- and in conclusion, we can use apparation to transport-"
Harry's alarm went off.
Harry popped up from the slumped position he had been in for the past hour, and ran towards the door.
"No cookies today Voldemort!" he called over his shoulder, slamming the door behind him to the sound of indignant sputtering.
...
"The letter was inviting me to tea. I think I'm going to go." Harry was back in Voldemorts office. He had his own, but Harry had found that if he never entered the room, he couldn't be blamed for any paperwork that slipped through the cracks.
"Burn her and her tea."
"Pyromaniac."
...
"So how is Ron doing?"
"Oh, I broke up with him years ago. I just contacted you because I'm lonely."
"Ah."
...
"So why isn't Overlord Potter ever in his office?"
"He's scared of the mountain of paperwork in there. Frankly, I am too."
...
"Potter! Get in here now!"
Harry ducked behind the coffee maker. He was late for returning back to work.
"Potter! If you don't get in here this instant, I swear I'll only let the Minions buy cheap coffee!"
Harry stood up and walked to his office, his shoulders sagging in defeat.
...
merry christmas y'all!