This is the first fanfiction I've published. I really hope you like it and can give me some feedback on what to change in the future.

The chapters are sometime written from Dracos perspective but mostly it's Harrys. I did not clarify which chapter is whose perspective, as I think it is rather obvious. I hope I did not do to many grammar/ spelling mistakes. Now, enjoy the story :)

-1-

There he was. Blond, beautiful and sound asleep. Laying in my bed as I realized in shock. How the hell did he end up here? I had no idea. A bad headache pounding in the back of my head.

I was out drinking with Ron and Seamus in my favorite muggle bar. I had discovered it about one year ago trying to drown my sorrows with alcohol. The bar had a really nice atmosphere which helped me to finally relax after all those exhausting years trying to defeat Voldemort and being worshipped as the boy who lived -twice.
Anyway, we were out drinking and I have to admit, my alcohol level was steadily getting out of hand. I remember stumbling out onto the street and two strong arms embracing me, preventing me from falling. After that all I remembered was sinking into a pool of molten silver which swallowed me whole.

His eyes- apparently- as I observed all so quickly as he opened them and stared at me. With an expression I could not place. I wrinkled my eyebrows and gave him an unsure smile. He continued to stare. I was getting really uncomfortable. This whole situation was merely a wild dream scenario. Or so I thought. But then the wild pounding in the back of my head made me realize that this was real. I groaned, rubbing my eyes with the palms of my hands. As I reopened my eyes, he was gone. Maybe I started hallucinating, I thought but his warmth still lingered within the sheets.

I got up happy to notice that I was at least wearing boxers and went towards the bathroom to check if I still had some hangover-potions. This was, of course, not the case. I made a mental note to purchase them the next time I go to Diagon Alley. But this obviously did not fix my problem in the slightest. I still had to figure things out. A lot of thigs.

-2-

First thing was to figure out, what Ron and Seamus still knew about yesterday. I owled them. Ron's reply came first, claiming he and Seamus left first, as they had been told by their wives to not return after 1am. Seamus letter quoted the same, telling that I had apparently ordered a whole bottle of Tequila as they were leaving. This started to look really bad. The only witness left was the last person I wanted to interview about this matter. The person who woke up in my bed this morning.

The second thing to figure out is why in Merlins beard I was not completely disgusted waking up next to a guy.

Which lead to the next thing to figure out: what exactly are my sexual interests? I always knew I was not as straight as I could be, but I never really thought about it. I always had a hard time finding someone who was really interested in me and not only my name and therefor my love life was as boring as Trelawnys Divination lessons had been –if not worse. And encounters with the same sex where nonexistent.

And now there was one last thing to figure out: What exactly are my feelings towards Malfoy.
It always came down to Malfoy. After the war and me saving him we have stopped hating each other. But what exactly are my feelings now? I honestly haven't thought about him in a while, being so busy with my own life. One could say that I almost forgot about him. Sure, sometimes I dreamed about him but not in that way. He almost only appeared in my nightmares. And after waking up, I could not really recall which roll he played inside them.
Now that I thought about it I realized that I've spent an awful amount of time stalking him back in school. Of course always excusing it with thinking that he was up to something. But upon further reflection that might not have been the only reason. There has always been something fascinating me about him. Maybe it was his hair, so blonde it almost appears white? Or his eyes, so silver, changing color slightly as his mood was shifting? Or his lips, capable of showing so many emotions but barely used for that? His sneers or his arrogant gazes? Or maybe his vulnerable side, weak and helpless, that I have seen only a few times? I honestly don't know. It probably was all of that.
There was one last thing that I noticed: he did not care for me just because I was Harry Potter. He did not run after me as so many others did, just to become friends with me. He did not see the great savior in me. I don't know what he saw in me, but it definitely was not my name, since he already had a big one himself.
Funny how it took me this long to realize something as important as this. Maybe, but just maybe, I came to like Draco Malfoy. 'Bloody Hell.' I mumbled, realizing that I've been staring into the open fridge for about 10 minutes now.

Still having a lot of things to figure out and get comfortable with, I decided it would be best to return to bed. As I snuggled back into my blankets I realized that his smell still lingered in the air. It was a lovely smell. Hard to describe but something with faint roses, a fresh ocean breeze and the smell right after the rain. The smell was really comfortable and welcoming it overwhelmed me completely. I quickly came to turns with the fact that I might not only like Draco Malfoy but might also be in love with him for some abstract reason. I remembered that one night in the bathroom as I saw him crying. So vulnerable, so hurt, so lost and left alone. And I had to hurt him in this barbaric way. Not intentionally of course, but still… I almost started crying remembering this fateful night. I wondered if the curse left scars on this perfect marble skin. Gosh, I missed him. Even though that made no sense at all. I longed to see him but had no Idea how. I drifted into a sleep that lasted until the next morning.

-3-

I woke up with the realization of what I had found out yesterday and what I had to do:

1. I was gay.

2. I was in love with Draco Malfoy.

3. I have to find him.

With this sorted out I was clueless on what to do next. I figured that maybe returning to the bar might help and asking the staff if by any chance they knew him. That was the best idea I came up with so I got ready and went to "The Pepperowl".

I recognized the waitress and asked her about my departure two days ago.
"Well you were really drunk and your friends had left already. You stumbled out and run right into the arms of Mr. Malfoy. He said that he knew you and would bring you back home." She said to my joy.
"So you know Mr. Malfoy?"
"Sure, he owns this place." I was baffled. This was the last thing I expected him doing after the war. Opening a bar in muggle London. Maybe that was why the bar had such a familiar flair to it. It reminded me of the warmth and comfort that Hogwarts had given me before the war. There was a little of Dumbledore's office, a little of the library, a little of the astronomy tower and a little of the great hall among other things.
"Er, is there a way to reach out to Mr. Malfoy? I'd like to thank him for the trouble he went through to get me home."
"He is currently on a business trip and will return in a week I think." She replied making me disappointed.
"Could you leave him a note?"
"Of course!" I quickly wrote a note, enchanting it with a simple wandless spell, so that he could not track it back to me and gave it to her.
"But please don't tell him that it is from me."
"Sure thing."
"Thank you for your help. See you soon."

I left the Pepperowl, not knowing if I was pleased with myself for finding him this quickly or disappointed for having to wait for one week to hopefully meet him in person again.

-4-

Finally back home, I thought as I arrived home from the ministry job I had to attend. It was a lecture about my recent muggle studies and a check up on how me living with them was going. I had no idea why I had to stay for a week, as all of this could have clearly been discussed in two days. I was finally able to get a good night's rest, as the bed in the Leaky Cauldron has been awful.

As I arrived at the Pepperowl the next day and went through all the mail and bills that had been piling up during my absence, I found this note on my desk. It had a slight magical aura and I was getting suspicious. I checked carefully weather it was enchanted or cursed, which it was apparently not. Curiously opening it and reading the obviously quickly scrabbled lines:

I hope to meet you on Friday, the 15th at the entrance of St James Park. I'll be waiting for you at 9pm.

With a puzzled look I cast a tracking charm. Too bad the sender had thought of that and made it untraceable. Today was Friday and it was already 7pm. Quickly considering whether or not to go to this mysterious meeting I decided that I should. But not dressed like this. I quickly disapparated home right into my bedroom and started searching my wardrobe for something decent to wear. It had to have class without being obvious that I dressed up for this date or whatever it was. It also had to be practical and movable just in case this was an ambush.
Even though I had been out of the wizarding world for some time, trying to get as less attention from other people, wizards and muggles, as possible and not stepping into the footsteps of my father or taking over the family business, I still had quite a few people who disliked or even hated me till this day.

After finding a suitable outfit, I disapparated back into my office in the Pepperowl and made my way to the Park.

-5-

I was getting really nervous. The meeting was in about 5 minutes. Has he even gotten the note? Did he think it was worthy to come? Has he a suspicion on who wrote it? I had no idea and it was driving me crazy. I've been pacing at the park entrance for about 15 minutes now and was getting more nervous with every second. All the words I had thought of were gone and I had no idea what to tell him if he should really come.

The minutes passed and I was getting dizzy from all the stress. I heard someone clear his throat and I stopped pacing and looked up in shock. There he stood in his full glory. Looking as classy as always.

"So Potter. What do you want to tell me being so secretive about this meeting?" He asked in his cold voice. I could not get a sound out. Opening and closing my mouth as I desperately tried to. He lifted one of his perfect eyebrows and looked at me as if I was stupid. Seconds passed and we stood there in silence.
"I am gay." I blurted out. Great Harry. What a way to start this conversation. You really are daft.
Draco rose his eyebrow again.
"And you are telling this me of all people because…?" he asked and I turned bright red. Stammering something that not even I knew what it was supposed to mean.

"Excuse me, but if you intend to only stammer irrational things, I have to leave." He said proceeding to turn on his heels.
"No, please wait!" I shouted louder than intended and he turned back around giving me a very skeptical look. "I wanted to thank you. For bringing me home."
"Yeah sure. It's not like I could have left you lying in front of my bar the whole night. I wouldn't have gotten any more customers that way." He said with an expressionless voice. I could not help but smile slightly. He once again raised one eyebrow.
"And you of course had to observe me all night just in case I had to vomit, being too drunk to notice and therefor choking to death." I said with a big smirk. Malfoy let out a loud sigh, shook his head slightly and proceeded to walk of.
"Please wait, I'm sorry. I was really happy to see you lying next to me in the morning. And I haven't slept that well since I can't even remember when. And I'd like to thank you properly. Maybe you would like to come to my apartment tomorrow? I could cook something and we could catch up or something?" Oh gosh. This was not going great at all. I could not think straight and just blurted out everything I thought of.
"If you insist. I'll be there at 8pm." He said and disapparated. A huge smile settled itself onto my face and I was as happy as I haven't been in a long time.

-6-

As I was back home I realized fully what I have gotten myself into. A wave of shock rushing through me. I had to think of something to cook tomorrow. I don't even know what he likes to eat. And I had to tidy up my apartment. It was a mess. And I had to get a nice wine to drink. And get decent clothing. Gosh, this was not my best idea.

But despite all the things I still had to do, I also felt a thrill of anticipation rushing through me.

-7-

Dinner with Potter. Really. How exactly have I gotten myself into this position? Why couldn't I refuse?
It probably where his damn puppy eyes.
At least he had to worry about the food. I could at least bring some wine I guess. And I should go shopping tomorrow. Now this really was a date, whatever intention he might have, and I should be dressed occasionally.

Argh, why the hell am I excited? It's bloody Potter I'm going to meet!

-8-

Alright, I have all ingredients, my flat is almost clean, I already decided on what to wear later. The wine was still missing but I have no time left to get some. I hope Draco brings some. I decided to make fondue for dinner. This way he can choose what to eat and it will probably be the first time he eats it, too. I've bought really good veal and chicken as well as some lamb. I also got some baguette, and a lot of other side dishes.

I got dressed in a dark green button-down shirt and black denims and tried desperately to tame my hair. I gave up after about 5 minutes, since it hasn't changed at all.

To prevent getting any food onto myself while preparing it, I tied an apron around my waist.

As I was arranging everything onto the table, I heart him apparate behind me.

"Potter," He greeted me with a reserved nod. "I've brought wine."
"Draco, you actually came." I said in delight. "Maybe you can pour us some glasses?"
"Sure." He said. He looked gorgeous in his dark ruby shirt and black pants. I noticed that I was still wearing my flowered apron and quickly took it off with a slight blush.

We sat down and I explained him how fondue works. He was skeptical at first but grew to like it.

"I really am glad that you came, Draco."
"Why wouldn't I, Potter? You asked so nicely." He replied, taking a sip from his wine.
"Would you please call me Harry? I feel rather uncomfortable by you still calling me Potter. We aren't the same as back in Hogwarts and I really would like it way better if you could use my forename." I said with a small smile.
"If you insist, Harry." My name sounded strange, yet nice when he said it. "What exactly is the purpose of this meeting anyway? Is it supposed to be a date?"
"If you'd like it to be?" I said a bit unsure. He lifted his eyebrow.
"I don't know yet. I mean we haven't talked in ages and our relationship back in school was not the best as you just said. But I think that I could definitely grow to like the idea of us being friends." He replied making my heart drop.
Of course. Being friends. How could I have hoped for anything else.
"Well you know, I am gay myself so it's not that I am averted from the idea of being together with a guy. But we still have a lot to catch up to and get to know us better before I want to do anything else."
"Did I think aloud again? How embarrassing…" I said being bright red in the face. "I did not know you where gay, Draco."
"It's not that I run around shouting it in other people's faces like you do." He retorted, my face being already the reddest it can be now grew really hot.
The rest of our dinner went by rather smoothly interrupted by only minor insults and we decided to meet again for dinner next week.

-9-

As I finally was back home and recalled our dinner I had a warm feeling spreading in my chest. I actually had fun with Potter. And the dinner was rather good, even though it is strange to cook the food right on the table.
How exactly did I agree to meet again next week? Have I drunken a glass of wine to much? Or did I really grow to like Potter? Or Harry as he preferred by now.
He seemed really surprised as I told him that I was gay myself. I thought that it was rather obvious back in school. He should have known how much I liked him following me and did things just to get acknowledged by him. I resigned with the fact that he does not like me, or guys in general, that way but still enjoyed his attention. Being the first person he told that he was gay himself was a huge but pleasant surprise. But it also brought back the pain of my first, unrequired love, which I had stored away pretty deep within me.
On the other hand it also brought a new possibility. That he could love me of all people. And this dinner really seemed like he did. I am already starting to reinterpret too much into this. I hope that my request to get to know each other properly first did not discouraged him and letting this new idea of being gay seem like a huge mistake.

-10-

The week passed by really quickly and I was facing myself with the same questions I had before our last date. Since he really liked fondue I was thinking to do either cheese fondue or raclette this time. Since there was this old, funny tradition that if you lose your bread within the cheese fondue you will get punished, I thought that I should keep that for a later date. So raclette it is.

After I got all the ingredients, I prepared them and placed everything onto the table. I was running rather late, so I rushed into my bedroom to dress really quick. As I went back into the living room, still pulling my long sleeve over my head I heard a chuckle. I froze in place as I realized that Draco was already there and saw me like this. I blushed heavily and quickly pulled my shirt down.
"You are early."
"No, you are late." I quickly checked my watch.
"Fair point. Ready to eat?"
"Sure. I brought white wine this time." He said waving with the bottle. We went over to the table and he poured us two glasses.
"What are we eating? Looks more like an experiment to me than dinner." I chuckled and explained what it was. He seemed interested and we started eating. Our conversation grew more personal this time and I was really happy to finally be able to have a proper talk with him. The evening passed by way to quickly but we promised to meet again next week. Since I was in charge for the last two dates, Draco invited me to a fancy restaurant for the next one. I gladly accepted.

-11-

I was constantly thinking of him. Always. I could not stop. Even though we haven't met that often, I was already pretty attached to him and did not want to let him go. My feelings became more and more clear with every day that passed. I want him. I had him in some sort of way. But how I could finally get him was still a mystery to me. I knew that everything depended on him. He was the one who would decide in which way our relationship will go. And I was really hoping that he had the same intentions as me. I could only wait and hope. I restrained myself from going to the Pepperowl almost daily, since I did not want to appear like a stalker. As it was finally Saturday again, I was so full of energy and excitement I could barely keep it in. I dressed in a new black suit coat, black denims and a dark green dress shirt. I knew he liked green back in school since it is his house color and was really hoping that it did not change. Dressed as good as I haven't been dressed in ages I went to go to the high class muggle restaurant he had chosen.

-12-

I was really nervous, even though I did not let it show, as me and Harry were sitting down in one corner of the restaurant. I had asked them to be seated as privately as possible and they were happy to help. The restaurant was rather dark, mostly lighted by the candles on the tables. It was really romantic, and I was really hoping that he did not feel too uncomfortable. He was rather quiet and I started to worry.
"Is everything all right? Are you uncomfortable? Shall we leave?" I asked him. He smiled.
"No, it's gorgeous here. I was just thinking that it is really romantic. But I love it." He said and we both blushed. The waitress came and took our orders. Harry kept staring at me.
"What?" I asked skeptical.
"You are just too beautiful to look away." He said in a dreamy voice and made me blush once again. As he realized what he just said his eyes widened slightly.
"I'm sorry I did not mean to…"
"…flirt with me this directly?" I tried to complete his sentence.
"Yes, I don't want to make you uncomfortable."
"It's all right. I don't mind." I said with a big smile. Since when have I become this soft? "You look gorgeous yourself by the way." Gosh control yourself Draco. Harry is really messing with your mind. But his insistent glances made it hard to remember. Luckily the waitress came back with our food before I could embarrass myself any further. We ate in silence. But the silence was not unpleasant.

After the restaurant we took a stroll thru a near park Harry took my hand and stood still. I turned around.
"It was a really nice evening, Draco. Thank you." He said with a small smile. "But I should go now."
"I also enjoyed it a lot. Shall we repeat it again next week?" I asked hopefully.
"I insist." He said with a big grin. "I'll owl you." He let go of my hand and apparated away.
I stood there for a moment longer, letting the whole evening sink in and disapparated home feeling really happy.

-13-

I was as happy as I have never been before. No nightmares, no flashbacks and not the desire to drink till I drop to forget about everything. I was glowing with happiness and love that even my surroundings started to notice. Hermione always looked at me suspicious whenever I came to visit and even Ron asked once if everything was ok.

For me, the weeks could not pass any quicker, since I knew, that I would be seeing Draco on Saturdays. All the more was I disappointed as he had to cancel this weeks date since the ministry asked him to come once more. He also sounded devastated as he told me but promised to come the week after.
Due to the change of plans I had a lot of time to plan the next date. I decided that it was time to play my joker: the cheese fondue. Since Draco would most likely not know the rules, I decided to alter them a little. Instead of punishment served with lashes, one had to undress one piece of clothing every time you lost a piece of bread in the cheese. I was really hoping that Draco would play along with this and not run away and never speak to me again. But since it seemed that neither of us was ready to make the first real step towards a relationship when we saw each other, I had to try it his way, since I could not chicken out at the last minute. Since Draco would be in charge to bring the wine, I owled him, that some bottles of white wine would be best for our next dinner date.

-14-

Due to this unnecessary ministry meeting I was forced to attend I missed a date with Harry. I was still mad thinking about it. The happier I was when I got his owl. He did not seem to be angry at all. I bought some of the best white wines I could find and was ready to apparate to his living room. It was still a little early, so I thought that it would be better to wait another few minutes, so that he would be ready when I arrived.

The time came and I apparated into his home with a total of four wine bottles. He was still in the kitchen preparing the dinner.
"Hi Draco. Mind giving me a hand over here?" He asked with a smile.
"No, sure. What shall I do?"
"Can you cut the bread over there into bite sized squares?"
"Of course. What will we be eating today?" I asked while placing the wine bottles onto the already laid out table.
"Oh, it will be cheese fondue. Have you ever eaten that?" He asked.
"No, never heard of it. Is it like the normal fondue that we had a while ago?"
"Basically. But you are holding bread into cheese this time. And there is a rule." He said with a big smile on his face. I raised an eyebrow.
"What rule?"
"Oh, nothing much. It's just that when you lose your piece of bread in the cheese you have to take of one piece of your clothing." He said and turned around to stir the cheese. I paused in shock. Did I really hear him right? It's not like I'm going to run away now but I definitely did not expect something like that. Bloody muggles with their rules and traditions.

As the cheese was ready and the bread was cut, we went over to the table and I poured us large glasses of wine. We chinked our glasses and I gulped halve my wine down. Harry raised an eyebrow but said nothing about it.
"Shall we begin?" He asked and I nodded. He impaled a piece of bread and dipped it into the cheese. And lost it immediately.
"Bloody hell." He cursed and took of his sweatshirt jacket. I chuckled.
"Do it better then!" He said jokingly.
"Well I'll try." I said and dipped my bread in the cheese. It luckily stayed on the skewer.
"See, that's how it's done." I said with a huge grin. He rolled his eyes as a joke. He took a new attempt but failed again.
"This can't be true!" He said and took of one of his socks. I decided that I should lose a piece too so that he would not feel too bad. He chuckled as I also took of one of my socks. We continued eating and it was a lot of fun. Harry's other sock, and T-shirt quickly followed and I got so distracted that I lost two pieces of bread in a row. He has a marvelous chest. Slightly muscled and slightly tanned. My distraction also cost me my second sock and shirt. Harry stared at my chest, mouth agape.
"I did not know it left marks." He whispered. I looked down. I completely forgot about those scars. We sat there in silence, both staring at my chest.
"It's nothing compared to what I did to you back then." I said after a while.
"No. That's not true. You haven't hurt me the way I hurt you." He stood up and walked around the table. He kneeled next to me on the floor and carefully touched my chest. His fingers tracing the largest of my scars which runs from my upper right to my lower left chest.
"I'm sorry." He whispered near tears. "I'm so sorry." His hand dropping back into his lap. He lowered his head and sat there sniffling. I raised his chin with my hand and he looked up through a curtain of tears. Bending down I carefully brushed my lips against his. Since he did not object to this I kissed him. Slowly first but he demanded more and more with every second. I also dropped to the floor, not breaking the kiss and he swung his arms around my neck. He broke the kiss resting our foreheads together and chuckled. I also chuckled.
"I think I love you Draco." He whispered.
"I think I love you too, Harry."