Chapter 1: Raised from Perdition.
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"Did you do the ritual right," Dean said in his girly high voice.
Bobby smiled lovingly. "Yes Deany Weany"
Dean smiled back at Bobby. "This reminds me of that episode of Dr Sexy MD. Ah, I love that beautiful show."
Suddenly the roof began to bang.
"Maybe it's the wind. Ah, mother nature," Dean said, fixing his floral shirt.
"I don't think so, Deany," Bobby said.
Suddenly the doors burst open and a cool looking dude with a leather jacket and sunglasses.
"Who are you?" Dean asked, smoothing his shorts down.
"I'm da one who gripped you tight and raised you from fucking perdition, man. I'm your homie," the Cool guy said hotly.
"Thank you for that. God forgive me for this sin," Dean said, plunging the knife into the cool dude.
The cool guy smirked cockily and pulled the knife out his expensive looking leather jacket. He touched two fingers to Bobby's head and he crumpled to the ground. Dean noticed that he had 'love' and 'hate' tattooed on his fingers. He was a cool rebel, Dean thought.
"Dude, we, like, need to talk. Y'know alone," Cool dude said.
Dean checked Bobby's pulse.
"That old dude's alive," the guy said.
"Who are you?" Dean asked.
"Castiel. But that name is fucking crap. Call me Cazza." He pulled his sunglasses off.
"I figured that out earlier. I mean, what are you?"
"I'm a fucking angel of the lord."
"No... angels of the lord have halos and harps. They don't look like bikers."
"That's your problem, Dean. You are a hippy."
Lightning flashes and great feathery black shadow wings appeared. They had rings on them.
"But Angels are supposed to be nice. You burned Pam's eyes out." Dean began to cry.
"Tough luck, dude. I'm a cool angel. But anyway. I told her not to take a sneak peek at my true hotness. And my true voice. But you know that cuz I spoke to you, man."
Dean looked shocked. "You... you mean at the shop and the hotel, that was you speaking? Oh lord, save me..." Deans hands went together in prayer.
"No need to fucking pray, man. I'm right here, y'know, dude. It was a fucking mistake, dude. Lighten up. Some guys and gals can see my true hotness and hear my voice. Your missing something, hippy.
"What visage are you in now, oh holy angel?" Dean said, his voice even more sing-song than usual.
"This is my hot vessel, man."
"You're possessing one of gods perfect creations. You sinner," Dean sighed.
"C'mon man. The hot bastard prayed for it," Castiel said, smirking.
"How can such a foul mouthed sinner be a holy angel of the lord. What are you really?" Dean said sadly.
"Dude, I fucking told you. Get the hell over it. I'm a fucking angel and I'm here to stay."
"But why would a holy graceful angel save me from eternal Damnation? I am a sinner." Dean sniffed, on the verge of tears.
"Cool things, sometimes happen, dude." The hot rebel angel sighed.
"Not in my painful experience," Dean began to cry. Again.
"C'mon dude. I know that you don't think you should be saved. Lighten up Deano."
"Why did you do it, oh holy angel?" Dean said.
"Because my Asshat of a father 'commanded' it," Castiel said.
"Who, Castiel?"
"I told you it's Cazza. 'God' commanded it. He is a dumbass. Because we have work for you, dude. Peace out, bro!" and with that, Castiel strutted off, putting his sunglasses on, making the doors open for himself, he hopped onto a very expensive motorbike and began to play the song 'I'm too sexy'.
"What on god's holy earth?" Dean cursed.