A/n: Hello everyone this will be a one or two shot. I hope you enjoy and please don't judge me for my sick sense of humor. Oh and sorry the summary I have to shorten words and disobey grammar laws to make everything fit. :(
"Where. Is. SHE!" Roar an angry half demon who stomp over his fellow friends, and throwing boulders into the sea.
"Yasha, yasha my man. You must calm down. You are scaring young shippo." The monk said holding the trembling fox to his chest.
"H-hey d-don't try to make it I'm the ONLY one scare." Shippo said holding on to the monk tightly.
"Yeah Inuyasha you scaring all of us. Kagome be back soon. She probably taking one of those test thingys." Said Sango. Always trying to be the ratio one.
"We all miss her." Stated sadly Sango. Miroku walk over to the foaming Inuyasha and hesitatively place his hand on his shoulder.
"Yes Yasha we all do. But throwing boulders won't help bring her back faster."
"You right Miroku. Throwing boulder won't help…."
"Yes, Yasha in won't."
"But I do know what will help…"
"and what is that Yasha."
Inuyasha turn and look at Miroku with soft like angel eyes that made Miroku see sparkles and hearts. Inuyasha slowly grab his hand off his shoulder and with no force at all he lift Miroku up and toss him into the sea.
"Throwing you!" Scream inuyasha.
"Miroku!" Sango said, jumping into the sea after Miroku. Inuyasha growl and turn away from the drowning monk and walk to the Bone Eater well to find Kagome and throw her in the sea.
"And don't ever call me Yasha again! Only Kagome call me that!"
"Kags try this on! I bet that silver hair boyfriend of yours will like this." Said her friend who push a outfit into her already full arms.
"He not my boyfriend Yumi! And I should really be going, I told you I have to leave before it get dark." Whined Kagome.
"What! Kagome, we hardly hang out anymore! And we still got plenty of sun light to kill. What that boyfriend of yours can't wait to you done hanging out with your friend? Geez." Yumi said with her hands on her hips.
"No Yumi It not like that! It just we been hanging out for the last two weeks and Inuyasha—"
"Here we go about that Inuyasha thing. Inuyasha this inuyasha that! God, can't you have one day without thinking about what inuyasha will do or feel." Kagome stare at her friend for a while and smile.
"You right Yumi . I do need a day to myself or a week." Yumi smile back and put her arm around kagome's shoulders.
"Now you talking. Let's go pay for these things and get something eat I'm starving!"
Inuyasha now stood in front of the bone eater well, debating whatever he should go in.
Go ahead you dumb dog go get her!
*Maybe I shouldn't. She'll be mad if I came got her when she was studying.*
So? Just eat her out. She'll get over it. NOW GO! I'm going crazy without scent!
*wait! We aren't even mated-*
Gooo!
With that roar from his demon Inuyasha jump into the well to find kagome.
Inuyasha landed hard on his feet, which hurt like hell! But try to ignore it.
Damn it. I hate it when my demon gets the best of me. Inuyasha thought and look up the well. Well since I'm here…
Inuyasha jump up the well and leap to the shrine door.
"…I'll go look for the hag." He said finishing his thoughts out loud. Inuyasha effortlessly kick the open and walk into Kagome's house like he lives there.
"Yo!" shouted inuyasha who stood at the bottom of the stairs.
"Inuyasha? That you?" Said a sweet motherly voice, who he knew oh so well.
"Yeah mom It's me. Is kagome here?" question Inuyasha.
"Nope she had been gone for the last two hour. She came in and zoom back out. She said something about go shopping." Reply the mom who was sipping on her afternoon tea.
"Shopping? That little—There precious jewel shards out there and she going shopping!"
"It appear so."
"DAMN IT! I'm going look for her, kay mom" Inuyasha said rushing to door with much haste.
"Inuyasha!" Inuyasha stop there in his track and turn his head.
"You can't go outside like that. Someone will notice those cute little dogs ear of yours. And those robes are filthy." Said the woman sipping on her tea again.
"Right. Then what should I do? These are the pair clothes I have with me. And I lost that cap." Inuyasha and the woman stare at each other for a while till a light bulb went off in the woman head.
"I got it. Let's go shopping!" the mom said practically jumping up and down. Inuyasha gave a 'wtf' look.
"Shopping? I ain't got time for that. I gotta find kagome!'' complain the fluster inuyasha. The woman simply ignore him and grab her keys.
"Ok you stay here, and I go pick out some yummy clothes for you. Kay." She gave him a peck on the check and left out the door leaving inuyasha confuse.
"Yummy? Can I eat them then?" He thought out loud.
"Meow." The fat cat said, while rubbing up on inuyasha leg. Inuyasha smile.
"Hey baby." Inuyasha said picking up the cat and rubbing it.
"meow."
Inuyasha sigh deeply and put the cat down.
"Yo, I'm going to Kagome's room. You know what to do." Said inuyasha slowly going up stairs.
"meow." With that the cat laid down in front of the door. Guarding it, for inuyasha.
Finally reaching Kagome room he took a deep intake of her scent that cover the hall way. He quietly quiver. Pushing her door open, Inuyasha almost die. Her scent was everywhere. And different in all places. Slowly Inuyasha sat on kagome neat bed, that smell like some indescribable undiscovered sweet fruit, it was the smell she got when she was arousal. He roll on her bed. Trying to get of much of her scent on him as possible. Grabbing her pillow he place it to his face.
"God. Kagome you smell so good." Inuyasha let his eyes roll back in his head and slowly rack his claws down his abs. Silently wishing their was Kagome's. Unconsciously his luscious lips form into an 'O' and his deep voice form into a low moan. His hand touch his pulsing male pride and stroke the tip. Kagome.
Back In Yasha Time….
Sango successfully got Miroku out of the sea and now was trying to perform CPR on the monk…
"Sango! Hurry up! Miroku might die!" Yell the tiny fox.
"WHY CAN'T YOU DO IT!" yelled a bright red Sango.
"Urgh! Cuz' you the oldest! Now do it!" said shippo who try to shove Sango's lips to Miroku lips.
"NOO!" Scream Sango who was oblivious to the figure standing over her. Shippo, seeing the casting shadow, he look up and quickly cringe in fear.
"What is the reason for you screaming….Human." Sango almost got a head ache when she turn her head so fast, to face the low, anger honey eyes of Sesshomaru.
"m-my lord." She bow to his feet trying her best to hide her fear in her eyes.
"what is the reason of your screaming, woman." Sesshomaru ask again, slightly annoyed.
"We came to help!" Said a high pitch voice girl that set on Sesshomaru shoulders.
Sango sat up and almost giggle seeing the Great powerful sesshomaru being use as a horse. But a quick glare from him, stop her from doing so.
"Well my Lord, my lady. Miroku the monk seem to swallow tons of salt water when your half brother toss him into the sea…"
"That meanie!" said rin puffing out her cheeks.
"Indeed"
"yes. He is a meanie. Well me and the young fox was having a little depute on who shall perform CPR on him." Finishing her story, she look at Sesshomaru who look like he just wanted to smack her.
"Sesshomaru-Sama can do it!" said Rin who jump down off his shoulder and ran to the monk.
"Rin have you lost your mind! Master won't do such a thing to a human male! What are you, a Yaoi?" Sango chuckle and decide that seeing Sesshomaru kiss Miroku will be a scene and she can tease Miroku about it.
"Oh Lord of the west, won't please do it. Our weak tiny lungs have no match for yours! Surely if you do it Miroku will be save! Please, oh please!" Said Sango, trying to boost the Lord of the West ego.
"Yea! Sesshomaru. Pleeeeassse! We are the team of justice and we must do anything in our power to help these poor people! That the motto of the West!" Said rin who stuck out her thumb out and smile big.
"And who the hell decide that was the motto of the west?" said Jaken.
"I did! And the motto also say don't question the motto of the west!"
"Who giving you this authority—"
"SHUTUP! Roar a furious red eye Sesshomaru. Shocking both Sango and Rin.
"I shall perform CPR on your monk, but after that there will be no more team of justice, no more motto of the west, and no more SCREAMING!" Breathing heavy sesshomaru sigh and rub his temple.
"Move." Getting on his knees he face the monk. Rin owe me tons of kisses for this.
Going in slowly, sesshomaru place his hand on the monk chest and let his hair fall to one side of his shoulder.
He really going through with it. Wish kagome was here.
Team of justice must privilege.
God, I wish that was me.
Pinching the top of the monk's nose. Sesshomaru tilt sideways and finally, let their pale lips touch.
***By The Way, mouth to mouth isn't the best way to perform CPR. The Chest thing is. ****
"Inuyasha! I'm back." Yelled mom.
"Finally!" said inuyasha walking out of the kitchen.
"Where the hell is the food at?" ask inuyasha digging in the shopping bags. He pull out a pair of light faded jeans.
These don't look yummy.
"Go try them on. I can't wait to see you in them!" said mom shooting inuyasha up the steps.
5 minutes Later…
"Are you done yet?" ask the mom.
"Yea. How I look?"
Inuyasha step outside of the bathroom and gave mom a great view. The hanyou wore a dark navy blue shirt, with straight legged dark blue jeans that made his butt more define. The shirt hug tightly around his abs, leaving not much for the imagination. And he had on black air walks. His hair was braided into a huge braid that hung to the back and his ears was pin down to his hair.
"Oh my God Inuyasha! You look so cute!" Inuyasha blush.
"do i?"
"yeah! Now go find kagome you sexy beast! Hehe." She tap Inuyasha on the butt. Inuyasha blush madly but continue to walk down the stairs.
Kagome. Your mother did well.
Inuyasha couldn't really run as fast with the jeans he wore, so he decide to just walk. He really did enjoy Tokyo view. There were tall buildings, weird stores, and LOTS of woman! Also there were ton of food places, that Inuyasha was dying to eat at. He could have stole it, but he remember the last time he did he got the worse lecture from Kagome. His ears was basically bleeding from her yelling!
"Kagome…. Where are you….I'm starving."
"Did you say, you starving? You young sexy man. Hmmmm" The much elder lady said. Inuyasha look at with disgust. She had on a lavender see through shirt on with a too tight, black leather jeans and her makeup was just a mess. Inuyasha took a whiff of her and could smell the alcohol of her lips and the chicken grease on her tongue.
Wait…chicken?
"Yeah, that what I said lady. You got something I can eat?" Inuyasha ask a bit aggressive.
The lady gave her a slutty smile, that made inuyasha crawl in his skin.
"Oh yeah, I got something for you to eat. Heheh. Follow me." She pull him by his hand and lad him inside of Dance For Mama.
Kagome and Yumi at the mall's food court-
"Hey Kags, whatcha think about us swinging by that strip joint up the block." Said yumi sipping on her smoothie. Kagome wasn't phrase by her best friend words, by now she use to odd words coming out her mouth.
"What strip joint?" She ask modestly.
"Ya know the one. Dance for Mama?" Yumi reply.
"Oh! Why you want to go there? That's for old women! Eww." Kagome said giving yumi pretend throwing up face. Yumi just smile.
"And besides, don't you have a boyfriend?"
"No! we broke up."
"Shut The Fuck Up! You and Kyou? I thought you guys will stay together for like ever!" Kagome say eyes pop wide open.
"Yeah me too…" Yumi say swirling her straw around with her pink nail finger. Kagome could see the sadness that painted her friend's eyes. She didn't want to ask what have happen, because she could kind of tell.
"Does he work there." She said, sounding more like a comment than a question. Yumi nodded yes.
"Ok. Its settle, we going." Yumi eyes look like it might just pop out her socket.
"You can't be serious, Kags." Yumi said
"Yeah I am. He hurt yumi, so let's hurt him back." Kagome smile and grab her friends hand and ran out the smoothie place.
"Kagome we just Dine and Dash!"
"Ladies! Look who I found!" said the old lady who show inuyasha off like he was some sort of meat. The ladies lick their dry old lips at inuyasha. He quiver once again.
What wrong these hags! Licking their lips at me like that!
"oooh. Kikyo, How lucky are we, to find such a strong, sexy, young man." Said another elderly woman with feathers in her hair who ran her long finger nails cross Inuyasha's abs.
"Get Away! You Old Bitch!" Inuyasha said pushing the elder lady nasty hand away from him.
"The name is Kagura." She said pulling out her fan and putting her nose in the air and viciously fanned herself.
"I DON'T CARE! I'm just wanted some food. But I can see y'all on some creepy shit. Bye!" And with that he try to flee to the door but was caught by a rough hand. Inuyasha quickly turn preparing himself to meet another wrinkle face.
"Please don't leave, man. Your our only hope. This place is more deadier than these ladies here" Said a young boy with chestnut hair with slight honey blonde streaks, and gorgeous blue eyes. Inuyasha look at the boy up and down and gave him snort.
"Give me one reason." Said Inuyasha who cross his arm against his chest. The chestnut hair boy grins and whispers
"All the food you can eat. And cash" Inuyasha didn't really care about the cash part, but the food part. The boy move aside and showed Inuyasha hungry eyes the feast. Inuyasha almost jump on the table but the boy stop him.
"Not-un big boy." Said the boy. Inuyasha snort, not really liking the nick name he gave him.
"What!" inuyasha roared.
"You have to promise to help us out for the day. And all this is yours!" Without a second thought Inuyasha agree and launched at the table.
"Wow Kyou, you should really consider being a salesman." Said Kagura. Kyou beam with confidence.
"Nah, I like getting naked better." Kagura giggle.
"A yo! New guy!"
Inuyasha turn around with a mouth full of food.
"You on in 20." He nod not really sure what she meant about that.
"Kyou, get the word out that we have a new guy, and he smoking hot."
"Yes ma." Kyou ran out.
"New guy?" she called out for him again.
'"your new name is Sex. Because it written all over you." She said all giggly. Inuyasha just ignore her and continue to eat.
Inuyasha's Time-
Sesshomaru was in his bathroom furiously brushing his teeth with mint leafs, and scrapping his tongue.
I Can't believe the FOUL BEAST tongue kiss me! Sesshomaru thought white still brushing.
"I'm going kill him…" Sesshomaru said accidently out loud so that rin's tiny human ear can hear him. An audible Urgh! Was heard from Sesshomaru's left, where Rin was bathing. He gave her an evil glare which she ignore.
"My lord. Sesshomaru. Omega. Alpha. Baby. You must calm down. It was an accident." Said rin who carelessly soak lower into the huge tub.
"Excuse me My Lady, Rin, Honey, Bitch, Love. Was you the one kiss by that foul human male? I don't think so" Sesshomaru said also calling her by her many names. Rin could see that He was very angry that he was kiss by Miroku. But was it that bad? Yeah, he a mockery, but who cares! He lord of the west! If anything he could kill anyone who dare mock him? Rin really didn't understand him at times.
Sesshomaru could smell the annoyness his mate was given off. He smile. He love it when she annoyed, she always makes the cutest face. His eyes slightly move to the left corner, and to his satisfaction she indeed was making that cute face he loved so much. Her bottom lip was pouted and her eyes was closed and her skinny eyebrows was knotted. Just adorable.
"What bothers you mate?" he ask.
"You are." She said a bit aggressive. But sesshomaru wasn't phase by it.
"Ah, I see. And what can I do to ease your ignorance with me." Sesshomaru said completely turning around to face his mate naked body. The water glistering from her silky legs made her look more goddess like. Sesshomaru eyes travel up more till it met her breast. They sat high and was the most roundness pair he ever seen. Next, his eyes went up to his favorite spot, her
face. Her already rosy cheeks was more redder due to the hot bath she taking, and her chocolate eyes stare at his. He smirk. She giggle getting what he was getting at.
"I don't know Alpha Baby, anything that will take the throbbing pain away." She said playful squirming. Sesshomaru grin wider, after hearing his favorite name being called. He pull his obi open revealing his 8 pack and his toned body. Rin ran her hand through her scalp and began to play with pink nipple. Which by the looks of it, drove sesshomaru crazy. His eyes was slowly turning red.
"Hurry Alpha! The throbbing is getting worse! Especially right…" She ran her hand down her flat stomach and between her large thighs where they got burry at.
"Here."
That was it. Sesshomaru eyes turns completely red and jump into the tub, splashing water everywhere. Causing a giggling Rin. "Ah! Sesshomaru! Your pants still on!"
Kagome Time-
"Okay Inuyasha you ready?" ask kyou.
"Yeah. I'm kind of nervous." Said inuyasha
"You not going back out on us are you?" said kyou getting ready to rise the curtain.
"No! I'm man of my word! Plus I owe you. The food was great and I ate all of it." Inuyasha said
"Don't worry 'bout it man. You can pay me back by dancing for those old hags!" And with that the curtain started to rise. And Inuyasha's stage name was being called.
"Ladies, and perhaps some gentlemen, I will like to introduce the new guy, SEX!" techno music start to play and the curtains finally was above Inuyasha's head.
Oh God…
There he was. Standing there, in front of all types of women. Some was old as dirt, some was middle age, and some was look very young. Whatever age, they was all staring at Inuyasha half naked body waiting for him to Dance for Mama.
"Yo? What are you doing! Dance!" said kyou from behind the curtain. Almost like a robot, inuyasha started to move his hips like they practice.
The ladies were a little confuse on what he was doing but soon it didn't matter. Inuyasha, getting more in to it, He begins to unbutton his red silk shirt he got from Kikyo. The ladies went wild.
"Take it off baby!" scream one lady. Inuyasha, remembering the rules, he smirk and said.
"If you want to see this you have to throw more than that chump change." Inuyasha said proudly.
Rule number 1: Play hard to get.
"Oh baby you can have it all!" like magic, she threw all her money. Inuyasha smirk. He got on his knees and begin crawling to the lady and sexy matter. Inuyasha look his soft lips and glaze it against the lady cleavage.
"Oh My God marry me!" said one of the ladies who try to grab inuyasha. Sadly she miss. Inuyasha quickly back roll and now sat in the middle of the stage on his knees. He slowly ran his hand down his abs into his loss pants where he seems to be stroking himself.
"Come get me." With that all the ladies squeal and threw him half of their rent money!
Kagome, with this money I'll buy you a new outfit or two.
"OMG, yumi! I thought you say it up the block! This up a Hill!" Whine kagome who drag herself up.
"It looked closer from the mall!" said yumi.
"Wait? Isn't that it?" Said kagome pointed at a blinking purple sign.
Yumi reached where kagome was at and smile.
"Revenge!" The two girls said In unison while running the rest of the way.
At Dance For Mama-
Inuyasha was making a killer. With the money he was making he can buy Kagome that bag she talk about getting. Inuyasha felt extremely proud of himself.
I wonder why Kagome don't do this. It sure the hell beat her waitress job.
"Hey! Sex! Get over here and give mama a lap dance!" demanded the old woman who wave her money fan at Inuyasha. He smile and seducetively walk over to her.
"How you want it?" He ask while licking his fatty top lip. The woman giggle.
"you on top." She uncross her lip and motion for inuyasha to come closer. He did what he was told from his mama. His tight chest press against her saggy and soft one. She slightly moan. Inuyasha felt himself about to puke but remember rule #6.
"Ooh baby I like when you moan like that. Do it again."
Pretend like you like it.
"ahh baby thrust into me!" the old woman moan. Inuyasha hook her leg around his hip and lightly thrust into the lady clothed vulva.
He was going with the beat of the rock n roll song. And was really getting use to it. Untill he heard a dreadful voice that he wish he wouldn't he didn't hear at this moment.
"Inu-yasha?"
He slowly turn his head hoping it was some old lady, that just knew his name and somehow sounded just like a hot headed 17 year old girl. But just his luck it wasn't an old hag. But a very red Kagome, standing there with her jaw drop.
"K-K-kagome! W-what are you doing here!" He ask while pushing himself up from the old lady.
"I could ask you the same thing!" she said poking at his naked chest.
"dancing half naked with an old lady! Have you no shame!" Kagome yelled at him. Trying to focus on inuyasha face not his naked sweaty chest.
God, he looks good in this light. She look at the old lady behind him who avoided her eye contact. I'm exetremely jealous that she gets a lap dance and what I get? A piggy back ride! Oh hell no!
Kagome wasn't mad a bit. That inuyasha was dancing half naked, and could had been discover. She found the situation quite amusing. But she couldn't let him see that. He will never learn the importance of him waiting at his own time for her. And she desevere a lap dance from him! Not some old lady that was twice her age.
I got it!
Kagome eyes begin to water and the sniffles started. She place her teary face in her palms.
"Kagome! Don't tell me you crying!" Inuyasha panic.
Why is she crying! It's not like I was fucking the old hag!
"Yes inuyasha I am crying! And it's all you fault! I-*sniffles* If you wasn't such a COUGAR! I wouldn't have to face this embarssment! What if one of my friends saw you! You don't care though, you just want get dick wet by a sweet young 50 year old lady!" Kagome slightly push him and dramatically ran out of the door. Leaving inuyasha jaw drop open and Yumi confuse.
"Cougar? Inuyasha how old are you?" Yumi ask.
Inuyasha ignore the question and ran after kagome.
(A/n: you guys get the cougar joke? If case you didn't, inuyasha like 500 year old and the 'old ladies' like 50. So he practically dancing with 'underage' women. Lol )
Kagome finally made to her house, out of breathe a course. She slam the door and place her ear to the door.
"Kagome? What are you doing?" her mom ask.
"Shhh! Inuyasha chasing me hehe." Mom giggle and walk off.
Young lovers.
Kagome stood there for another 30 seconds til she heard footsteps running up to the door and her name being scream. She giggle and ran up to her room.
"Kagome!" Inuyasha busted the door open and hungrily search for the crying woman.
"Buyo! Where is she!" he demanded. The cat meow and turn its head to the steps. Inuyasha nob and quickly ran up the steps to the room of his crying woman. He reach her room and like at the bone eater well, he couldn't move. Not because he was scare of her wrath, but the scent he pick up.
*She… laughing?*
Yup. Yashie. It look like she played you. She just wanted you to chase after her, to pay attention to her. She probably got jealous.
*Jealous?*
Yeah! Are you really that dense! She obvious want us! No thanks to you.
*Excuse me? Want you mean 'us'?* With that inuyasha open the door to see his woman laughing face.
"Inuyasha!" Kagome face was all red from the laughter fit she had and chest was rising up and down from the lack of oxygen she was getting from her instance laughter. Instead of inuyasha getting upset and fluster. He simply just smile.
Well at less she not mad at me.
"Oh..My…God! Yasha! Why will do such a thing!" She said trying to keep her seriousness.
But inuyasha could clearly see she wasn't a bit serious.
"Yeah, yeah cut the bull Kagome. I know you think that it was freaking hilarious, no need to try to hide it, it all in scent." Inuyasha said crossing on arms and taking seat on kagome bed.
"Yeah it was! What made you do such a thing!" Kagome ask still giggly. She look into his eyes and see that he was obviously embarssare from it and her laughing wasn't making it any better. She instancetly felt bad. She move closer to inuyasha and nugde his shoulder.
"Hey?"
"what?"
"If it help anything I thought you look pretty sexy doing your lap dance thingy." Inuyasha look at kagome with shock eyes.
"Really?" he ask fully turning to face kagome.
"Yeah! I'm kind of jealous that that old lady got front seats." Kagome said. Inuyasha smile.
"Well kagome. If you wanted one all you have to do is ask for one."
"wha—Wait! Inuyasha!" it was too late for protest Inuyasha had successfully pent kagome down and was now between her legs.
"Inuyasha…I can't afford you though." Kagome said grinning.
"Don't worry about it. We find a way to pay off your debt." Kagome chuckle and inuyasha lick his lip seductively.
"Well. Inuyasha what are you waiting for? Shake that ass for Mama."
"Yes 'a."
-Fin-