I wish you knew how much I love you

A/N: Hey everyone! I'm sorry for possible mistakes as I'm new around here and English is not my first language… This is my first story… Tell me what you think!

I don't own Bones…!

Memories from the last night filled his mind. They had solved a difficult case, the kind of case that even when it's closed you can't possibly feel relieved or satisfied. They had found the murderer of a young woman and her baby who turn out to be the father of the little girl. Booth got so pissed during the interrogation room that he lost control and attacked him. Brennan tried to calm him before the murderer end up in hospital so that he won't put in danger his career. But even later, sitting with his Bones at the Founding Fathers having a drink, he was still agitated as he couldn't accept the death of those two innocent victims. Brennan wanted to say something to break the silence and make him feel better but she was certain that it couldn't find the right thing to say.

"We did everything that we could, we manage to catch him you shouldn't hit him. Your reaction was off limits, you can get into trouble and…" he didn't let her finish

"I know Bones… I know it was completely stupid but… Just listening to him… I just couldn't control myself. I'm sorry Miss Rational!" she could get that he was still angry because otherwise he wouldn't react like that.

"You may disagree with me being rational and logicalbut you can't argue with me about his reason for killing them!" Brennan was also influenced by the case and started defending her point.

"No you are absolutely right. He was crazy, he thought that she was unfaithful and the little girl wasn't his while she loved him so much that she put up with his temper. I mean you saw the remains, how he treated both of them… They suffered! I couldn't sit there and watch him felling no remorse!" Booth desperately tried to calm down but he couldn't make it and she didn't actually help him

"One more example to prove my opinion about love. Love is just…"

"Stop it! Right now! Just because there are some sick people who use the word love to describe their mental problems doesn't mean that love doesn't exist!"

"Oh come on Booth! Please… How many times do we have to talk about it so that you can accept the truth?!"

"Here we go again! Or maybe for once you should be the one who admit that you are wrong!"

"There is absolutely no chance that this will happen. Love is… Booth what are you doing?" at this point Booth get up, paid and headed towards the door.

"Booth!" Brennan tried to bring him back with no success.

"I am sick of hearing you say all those things for love after all this time!"

"Booth where are you going?!"

"We're leaving Bones. I'm going home. I am way too exhausted and I don't want to fight with you."

"Booth let's go back inside it's raining and we need to calm down what will you do at home? Stop getting so angry about this subject. All right, you have your opinion, I have mine end of discussion. We don't have to leave."

"No Bones! I'm tired! What do I have to do to show you that you are wrong?! There are some people who won't leave you alone Bones. If you just open yourself up to the possibility of a relationship maybe you would trust someone!"

"Hey what do I have to do with that?"

"Are you kidding? Your obsession against love is so frustrating Bones! Why don't you just let someone in? Trust him? Maybe he could make it to what I'm desperately failing all those years, explain to you what love is. Just give it a chance…"

"Are you serious? Do you want to know what happens when I do all that? When I trust someone? He dies! I trusted you and you died! That's what I get when I open up to someone! Or if you are not pretend to be dead, you always get yourself so close to death! That's what I get so don't even talk about trust!"

"You want to talk about me! You know that you were the first person on my list but…"

"Oh I know stupid Sweets, he didn't tell me but…"

"Besides Sweets you most of all know that I would give anything not to see your heart broken, I would die for you, I would kill for you and I will never leave you even if you want me to. I'm not the one who doubt you after four years or called you a loser!"

"You know I didn't mean it. I was wrong…"

"You Bones have broken me so many times… Even more than…"

"Even more than when Booth? Like you ever talk about yourself! You're talking about trust and you never tell me anything without being blackmailed or pressured by Sweets!"

"You know that you are the only person that I trust with my life and I could say anything to you, the only one that I've shared some moments from my past!"

"Yeah I've heard all these multiple times!"

"So now you tell me that I don't care about you?" suddenly his voice was low and he sounded really hurt

"No… Of course not! You care, you're always the only one who cares…" with that Booth got even more angry and stepped right in front of her, their faces were now only inches apart as their eyes locked and his voice got really louder.

"You want to know why I don't bare myself to you. Have you ever thought that I hate this part of my life? That I hate how much it hurts or how weak I feel every time I think about it? I mean you are Dr. Temperance Brennan, you deserve someone who can stand up to you, you don't need a looser who tried to kill himself because his father beating him, I should try to protect you from me" she tried to stop him but he didn't let her.

"I mean big deal, you've had worse but you never gave up. So if you want me to tell you about my past, I'm sorry but I won't, I have already disappointed you. You don't need to…"

"I hate when you do this, when you underestimate yourself and could you please stop taking decisions for me! Because it's getting really annoying! Stop protecting me or my feelings, I can do it myself."

"I'm sorry Bones but I'm not going to sit here watching you getting hurt. If you want me to stop, go ahead; make a request for a new partner! Be my guest, I'm not gonna stop you! I don't know what else to do!"

"Why?"

"Why what?"

"Why are you keep doing all these?"

"Because I care about you…"

"Oh really! You care about me? Is this the real reason Booth? Because there are some people who care about me but they don't react like that!"

"What do you want me to say Bones?"

"The truth! Just tell me why…"

Brennan couldn't finish her words as Booth kissed her. He brought both of his hands to the sides of her face caressing her tenderly and he tried to silence her with a simple touch of his lips. Of course his fears were right, he knew that once he would start kissing her he could never stop. He was trying to think what brought them here, all those years he tried to control himself around her and now an argument made him lost his self control. And while he was terrified about the consequences he every single concern escaped from his mind when she almost immediately returned the kiss with equal passion.

As a result of this argument the kiss was passionate, revealing the tension that they tried to hide all this years but in the same time it was tender, full of love and pure feelings that neither of them had feel for no one else in their life.

And right there, in the middle of the road, soaking wet from the rain they had both lost track of time. They were alone in their own world where no one could ruin their moment and no one could stop them from being together, happy without problems and lines getting between them.

Booth was praying for her to understand his feelings. He wished that she'd know how much he loves her and she wouldn't run when this moment is over. But at this moment her body betrayed her, she froze and he could get that once again Bones was building her walls… And one of the most beautiful moments in his life which was so close to the perfect dream would turn into a nightmare where he would lose the love of his life forever.