Ahh… Soooo handsome…. And soooo peaceful… I could just stare all day. That large nose, the soft and flowy hair… He is perfect. Of course, then again, everything about Branch is perfect. My mind drifts, however, and I return to my main purpose of being here. I reach into my pack to pull out the "thing." I raise it above his head, about to strike down and- I gently squeeze the contents of the packet full of fake bird poo out onto my dear, dear boyfriend's head. I grin and prop my head up with my hand while lying on my side.
Hmmph. I guess I gotta stop my "stalking behavior" as Branch would put it and start setting more up. More meaning some more of the best pranks in the whole wide world that has ever been known to trolls!
What most everyone knows about I, Poppy, is that I am one of the most seriously awesome pranksters in the whole entire Troll Tree. I also have absolutely no problem exercising my mad skills. I gently hop out of Branch's bed and start for the bathroom. Ooh, there's some good one's in here!
I reach backwards into my backpack and pull out "the soap." This soap is gonna be great! When he washes his face this morning, he's going to look in that mirror and see a boatload of black residue covering his face. Hee, hee, hee! I can't wait to see the look on his face! The best part is that the outside of the soap is white. That way, he'll be completely blind sighted by my awesome pranker skills.
Woohoo! Next on the list is the fake dog poop. I sneak outside his pod and place it on the ground in the exact place where I know Branch will put his foot. Ha, ha! I'm so evil!
I skip to the next and final destination- well, the final in Branch's house- of my prank: Branch's chair at the kitchen table. I pull one of the best prank gadgets of all from my bag. You know which one I'm talkin' about! The whoopee cushion! I blow it up and sit it gently under the thin cushion sitting in the chair. I giggle quietly and bounce in place. Now, I sit on the couch and relax. My mind drifts to this morning.
This morning when I woke up, I got a hankering, I got a feeling, I got a- well, you get the idea. Anyways, I had the need to pull some pranks. My day was one hundred percent free since everything's been peaceful lately, so I figured, "Why not spend the day with Branch?" Well, I thought about it, and more and more I was leaning toward the pranks, but then again, the more I leaned toward that, the more I wanted to see Branch. So then, I did what any reasonable troll who wanted to play tricks and see her boyfriend would do: I combined the two into a fun prank day spent trying to pull practical jokes on Branch! Yep. I'm a bonified genius.
I suddenly hear groaning and a bed creaking. I drop my backpack then rush over and barely peek around the corner, trying to see what he'll do in response to my first prank. I stifle a giggle when I see him reach up on his head and touch the poo. Branch pulls back with a confused look and peels it off of his face, staring it down. He gives it a disgusted look and walks to his bathroom, presumably to throw it in the trash.
I follow and once again resume my position behind the corner. He drops the poo in the garbage bin resting beside the toilet and reaches for the soap I set up. I watch with excitement as he wets his face then scrubs his hands with the soap, shortly following up with rubbing his face. Branch opens his eyes and looks in the mirror. His eyes widen considerably larger than their normal size and he quickly rinses his face off. I make a mad dive for the side of the bed opposite to the bathroom doorway. I hide just in time to see Branch come out of the bathroom heading for the kitchen.
I quietly tiptoe behind him and pick the perfect hiding spot, which, in this instance, is behind the couch. Branch trudges around, preparing himself what I assume is cereal. My eyes widen as I spot him sitting the cereal down in front of the rigged chair. I watch with bated breath. This is so EXCITING!
Ooh, he's getting closer! Closer… Closer… Bam! I watch eagerly from behind the couch as Branch sits on a whoopee cushion. I stifle a giggle as I watch his eyes become bigger than saucers. He hops up like his rear is on fire and looks where his behind was resting. He picks up the now-floppy cushion and looks around with a suspicious expression on his face. Oh, my troll! I can't hold it back. I cover my mouth quickly after releasing a snort that a warthog would be proud of. I watch and quickly hide my head behind the couch once I see Branch's ear swivel in my direction and his head follow quickly in succession. I breathe quickly as if in a marathon. He's going to catch me! Where can I hide?! Ooh, this isn't the best idea but I'm going to try it!
I watch nervously through my now-green tresses as Branch walks around the edge of the couch and, with a confusedly surprised look, studies me carefully. I make sure to be really still so he won't realize I'm not some weird plant. He finally turns carefully and slowly, still eyeing my disguise, and leaves. Phew, that was a close one. Now I just gotta wait for him to leave his pod. That could be a while. Anyways, I-
"AAAAAAHHHHHHH!" I yell when Branch jumps back in front of me, pushing my hair out of the way. I fall back against the couch.
"Gotcha. Now what in the world are you doing here?" he asks me holding out his hand to help me onto my feet. I giggle, knowing what's coming next. I grab his hand with mine. He immediately lets go with a yelp. Branch looks between my hand and his palm. I giggle and hop onto my feet. I show him the palm of my hand where I've attached a hand buzzer. He gives me a look and says, "Seriously?" I grin at him and give him a hug.
"Yep. Seriously. I just had to see my man and I just had to pull some pranks so," I extend my arms toward him and shake my hands, "I combined them!" I bow. "Thank you, thank you. Yes, I shall graciously accept the 'Cutesy Regal Queenly Genius Award.'" Branch looks at me funny.
"That's not even a thing," he says and I turn.
"Talk to the back, baby. Anyways, I've got a lot more planning and executing to do. Catch ya later! Bye!" I exclaim mischievously and kiss him on the nose, shortly skipping out of his pod afterward.
"Bye," Branch says, presumably confused. Good. That's the way he needs to be. I can't help but hear Branch's angry yell when he steps in my fake dog poop.
"DANG IT, POPPY!" I laugh and yell back.
"Love you too, Branch!" I giggle some more and leave off to continue my prank plans. Now where does he go usually that I could catch his grumpy butt into some trickstery traps…. Ooh! The community garden! I make a mad dash for the garden so I'll be there before Branch arrives.
Now to get one of my pranking super-tools. I reach backwards for my backpack only to find it not there. Wait, what?! Where the heck is it?! Oh, cheeseballs. I left it at Branch's pod…. Aww….. Well, I guess I'll just have to go back and get it. After all, it has all my stuff!
I skip briskly back to Branch's pod, stopping only once when hug time arrived, and finally arrive. I eagerly walk in but soon feel something squishy underneath my foot. I look down at my foot and raise it. Eww…. Poop. Wait just a trolling minute. That's my fake poop. I shake it off my foot and walk toward the kitchen. Yeah, right. As if he could scare me! I'd like to see him-
"AHHHHHHHHHHH!" I scream loudly when I see the horrific sight of Branch, vest-less and on the floor bleeding from a horrible wound and lying in a huge puddle of it. I run and slide over to his side, ignoring the wet now covering my knees. Branch, Branch, Branch, Branch, Branch, Branch!
"Branch! ARE YOU OKAY?! What the heck happened to you!" I scream and do what everyone does in the movies. I rip off a strip of my dress and wrap it around Branch's cut. I'm doing such a terrible job, but maybe it'll help somehow until I can find somebody to help me. I freak out and am becoming increasingly panicky until I hear his voice in my ear.
"Gotcha," Branch says. I immediately stop panicking and turn my head toward him to see him lying on the floor again laughing at me. I knit my brows. What the heck?
"Branch?" I look down at the blood on the floor.
"Look in the trash can," he says. I look through the mesh of the trash bin. Is that…. fake blood packets stacked up in there? I look back at Branch. But that still doesn't explain the cut.
"If that's fake," I point down at the puddle below me and then pull my makeshift bandage off of his cut, "then how is that there?" I ask and point to his cut. Branch chuckles and shows me a sheet of tattoos of fake cuts, bruises and scratches. I gape at it, surprised. What?! HE TRICKED ME!
"BRANCH! YOU GAVE ME A TROLLING HEART ATTACK!" I punch him in the arm. I stare into his eyes angrily for a moment. But it really was a good prank…. I now stop staring into those beautiful eyes and start giggling. Soon, my giggling turns to snorts and laughter. I wrap my arms around Branch, hugging him while laughing. I feel him laughing too.
Soon, we stop out giggle fit and we pull away to gaze at each other.
"I don't mean to be rude or interrupt the moment, but…. You totally deserved that," Branch says. I grin back at him sheepishly. He's so silly.
"Yeah, I guess I did. Sorry I bombarded you with pranks today," I say. I hide a hand behind my back and pull my backpack closer, reaching inside to withdraw my hand buzzer. The whole time I keep a sweet smile on my face, trying to make sure he'll be completely blind-sighted.
"It's okay, Poppy. Besides, looking back on them, they were pretty funny. I mean, I must've sounded like a crotchety old troll yelling at some kid to get off of his lawn when I stepped in the fake poop outside." I giggle loudly.
"Yep! So, we're good?" I hold out my hand. Branch smiles warmly- good grief I kinda feel bad- and reaches out his hand to take mine.
"Of course," Branch says and grabs my hand.
"BZZZZZZZZT!" I get up and run out of Branch's pod, running for the lake to rinse off my clothes and skin.
"Bye!" I yell over my shoulder, knowing he's close behind.
"POPPY!" Yep. Best prank day ever.
Hey, everybody! This is the outcome of the poll I posted on my profile. Everyone voted "Mischievous!" YAY! Anyways, go to my profile and pick which story for these two you'd like to see next: "Flirty" or "Grumpy?" I hope you all enjoyed this! Read, review, and most importantly have a rockin' fantastic day!