Allie clutched tightly Bea´s waist. She was sure that the older woman will have bruises next day, but she couldn't care less. After hours of crying and little talking, they finally fell asleep in a tight embrace. Allie was curled up against the redhead with her head on her chest. She had one hand under the pillow while the other was wrapped around Bea pulling her hard against herself. The young blonde was determined to never let go. They will be like conjoined twins, attached by hips or hands or any part of their body, she didn't really care. The point is that she won't let go – ever.
It all happened three months after she killed Fergusson. Yes, she did it. It took longer than she would like, but it happened. Allie Novak single-handedly outsmarted the psychotic bitch and made the world better by getting rid of her once and for all. Frankie was not happy. The tattooed brunette was convinced that by killing her Allie went against Bea´s wish. Surely the redhead wouldn't like to know that the woman she loved so much gained herself a life sentence.
Allie felt differently. Bea maybe wouldn't like that she got herself locked up for the rest of her life, but for her, it was a relief. She felt like being in Wentworth will keep her close to the memory of Bea Smith. That walking the same hallways, living in the same cell will keep her connected to Bea. She didn't know any other way and she couldn't imagine herself being out and free again. There was nothing left for her outside. Frankie tried her best to convince her otherwise. She wanted from her to fight and live for Bea, to get out and be happy for the two of them, but that was something Allie couldn't imagine.
Bea wanted revenge for her. She went after Fergusson for her, she died for her. Allie couldn't let that slide. She loved Bea Smith so much before, but after learning how truly deep the redhead´s feelings were she couldn't help just fell for her even more. Of course, she was angry with her. How in the hell she dared! Throwing her life away like that! But if she wanted or not, if she was angry and furious or not – after awhile, when the pain numbed a little bit, she felt something very warm and cozy. Knowing that Bea loved her so much gave her some sort of strange comfort.
The love she felt for the redhead was reciprocated fully. Bea Smith loved her more than she dared to hope. It felt empowering. It made their love special. They loved each other with pure and genuine feelings. It was not a simple crush or quick infatuation. It was real, raw and deep. They were meant to be, their love goes beyond grave and time. So yes, killing Fergusson was meant to be too. It was the right thing to do and it felt good.
After Frankie´s release, thankfully she was able to prove her innocence, revenge was the only thing on Allie´s mind. She has been thinking about it constantly. She simply had to do it to stay sane. They say that revenge won't help you feel better, that it won't bring your loved one back. That it won't help you fill the emptiness within. It is not exactly true. Yeah, Bea was still dead and the emptiness was present, but it really felt good and it helped Allie to get better. It took some weight down from her chest. Maybe admitting it makes her an evil person, but who cares. Allie certainly didn't.
She didn't care about anything. Killing Fergusson made her the most powerful woman in the prison. She gained respect and some women wanted her to be the top dog, but she has declined. Bea taught her that being the top dog is the worst thing what can happen to you in a prison. So, she just kept for herself. She knew that she will have to find something to do soon or she will go crazy. But after all, she went through. It was nice to breathe again.
Weeks passed, life went on and all was good. Then she got called by Bridget. They were sitting in her office and the psychologist was rambling about how some news is tough to be delivered. Allie thought that her dad must have passed or what not, but then Bridget said that earth shattering sentence. "Allie, Bea is alive."
She almost passed out. Her body got an emotional jolt. Bea is alive. Her brain was slow to process so the first thing she felt was a burst of sharp pain running through her nerves. It woke up every cell in her body. She couldn't believe her ears and her brain was far away from processing, but she felt lighter already.
Allie leaned back in the chair her chest heaving with deep breaths.
- What do you mean that she is alive?
Bridget smiled softly and Allie hoped that this is not some sort of a cruel joke or a dream.
- After Nils Jesper died they have decided to place her into witness protection. – she said.
- But she died.
- She didn't, it was very close. She was stabbed numerous times as the news said and she was critical for days. It looked really bad, but she pulled through and witness protection was the best choice.
- Where is she?
- She was in Bathurst with Maxine. As far as I know Bea fought hard to be with Maxine. It was one of her conditions to testify against Fergusson that they transfer Maxine so she could have better conditions to get better.
Allie felt as her lips spread into a smile. Of course, she did that. She could see that. Bea Smith barely surviving a brutal attack just to help her friend.
- You said she was in Bathurst, where is she now?
Allie´s voice trembled. She squeezed her tights and let her nails dig into her soft flesh as she was waiting for the answer.
- She is waiting in the governor´s office.
Allie´s breath stopped. Bridget squatted in front of her, placing a comforting hand on her knee.
- I will go for her and you two can talk.
Allie often felt her heart racing, she got used to it while Bea was around. But now her heart was hammering against her ribcage so fast and hard that it was painful. She wanted to keep it together but it was too late as a loud sob already left her mouth.
- You have all the time you need, alright. I will go and talk to girls from H1. Nobody will disturb you, but there will be one officer outside in case one of you will feel sick. Let him call Vera if you need something, alright? – Bridget asked and Allie just nodded wiping her tears with her sleeve. – Allie, I have to warn you, that she doesn´t look like you remember her. She lost weight and she is …
- Just go for her, please go to her! – Allie interrupted her. If this is all true then she needs to see her. She just wants to be with her. Nothing else matters. Bea is alive! Allie was sure that she was dreaming. This can´t be true!
But it was. Bridget left and before Allie had time to wrap her head around all that was said and wipe her face the door cracked open again and a very slim Bea Smith entered the room. Their eyes locked and even if Allie knew she was coming, seeing her face was like a huge punch in the gut leaving her breathless and speechless. She gasped and covered her mouth with her hands trying to muffle the escaping sob.
Bea closed the door behind herself and then she leaned against it. Her eyes closing as she slid down to the floor choking on tears. When she opened them again she found two big blue eyes staring at her in disbelief. Allie was shaking and quietly sobbing, tears running down her cheeks in a steady flow. Ten seconds went by as they were just staring at each other, both of them trying to catch their breaths. Allie stood up her legs were shaking and far away from steady but they have carried her to the door. She sat down in front of the older woman and within a second they were wrapped around each other.
Allie pulled Bea on her lap and buried her face into her neck sobbing violently as soon as her lungs were filled with the unique scent of the former top dog. They were holding onto each other and crying for long minutes before Allie finally pulled back a little just enough to have space to kiss Bea. She kissed her on the lips hard three times then on her cheek before hugging her tightly again.
This time it was Bea who pulled back taking Allie´s face into her hands. She smiled brightly through the tears and tried to wipe some of Allie´s too with her thumb before kissing her softly. The volume of emotions behind those soft lips was incredible and Allie felt her whole being filled up with warm and calming love. She closed her eyes enjoying and memorizing the feeling just to be forced to open her eyes again as Bea pulled away. Allie smiled looking into those intense brown eyes which were piercing into her soul. She would swear later that she felt it sooner than she heard it. Flood of powerful and unconditional love washing all the pain away.
- I love you beautiful girl. – raspy and coarse voice said and Allie smiled.
Those five words were enough to wipe away months of bone crushing pain. Suddenly everything became brighter and so much lighter.
They stayed like that for hours, crying, kissing and whispering sweet nothings to each other until a knock on the door interrupted them. It was Bridget, checking in and telling them that H1 is ready for them if they feel like going down. Bea hugged her and told her to ask Frankie if she could come and visit. There was a lot of things to discuss and a lot of things to say.
Allie and Bea were escorted down and H1 was locked down for the night before time to keep visitors away. Prison is a very small place and full of gossip. News about Bea´s revival and return spread quickly. To make sure that she has time to settle and reconnect with her friends in peace they closed their unit and nobody was allowed to even come nearby.
Of course, the whole reunion was full of tears and questions, but after everyone understood that yes, it is real and that she is back, they let her and Allie return to Bea´s old – now Allie´s - cell.
Soft light from the lamp outside poured inside through the cell´s small window throwing soft shadows on the walls. Allie moved her head higher to nuzzle into the now strangely brunette Bea´s neck and then she softly kissed the warm skin under her lips. When there were no tears left, they slowly drifted into sleep exhausted to no end. It was an amazing but still so emotionally draining and tiring day. They had no time to talk or explain what exactly happened. Force of the emotions running havoc in their hearts and souls stopped them from asking questions.
Allie knows that it will take time. Their wounds and scars are too deep and raw, it will take time and effort to heal. But that didn't stop the goofy smile forming on her lips. She clutched onto the older woman like a leech. Bea is alive! Doesn´t matter how hard it will be or how long it will take. They are in this together no matter what – for a life.