As I await 'divine' (not really) inspiration for my other Snape-related fics, I like to dabble with some extra writing. So here is a short piece on him and Lily. Maybe more are coming. I can't know for sure. Was convinced to write after looking over some other Snape stories. And because I felt tonight Snape deserved retribution.
And that is all:)
When, that night, he retires to his well-known, gloomy Common Room, he knows his life will be gloomy. Not just his school years, which are trudging by with a cruel slowness, but also his late youth, his adulthood, his elder years, all of it. They'll all be shite, literally. Even afterlife will be grey, instead of pink and blue.
Do the stars hate him?
Not that he isn't grateful to the stars for the more than average intelligence.
Maybe he isn't quick or strong, or handsome, or even very good with his manners, but at least he is damn smart. Brilliant, some would say.
Not Lily though. No, she prefers calling him an arse, or a jerk, or something similar to that. She doesn't see him as brilliant. Not right now. Nor would she ever.
She likes yelling at him at the top of her lungs, only so she could whisper what he really wants to hear. She likes making him feel like the last person alive.
She likes telling him he's to blame.
When all he did was defend himself, when all he did was claim his right to live in peace. When all he did was stand still and let them take his freedom away.
When all he did was dangle in the air like someone who had lost his gravity.
When all he did was be a coward.
Lily doesn't appreciate that he has been a coward for her.
Who could appreciate that? Who could understand?
He doesn't even know himself. He thinks maybe he should be less selfish. He thinks he should try harder.
So he gives her everything; he lets himself fall at her feet, in front of the Gryffindor common room.
He receives no recognition for it, as he had expected.
So, even when he is up in the air, even when he is down on the ground, there is no change.
Lily will not look down to where he is. She will only stand tall and proud and tell him she has nothing to do with him anymore.
'You'd better get back to your House. You wouldn't want to spend time with the Mudblood, would you?'
That's all you get in this world for loving.
Yes, his life, Severus Snape's life would be gloomy.
So was the poet right?
Is it better to have loved and lost than…