*Just a little something Missy and I came up with to get a laugh. And laugh we did! This continues from Ch 10 of Kissing Coffins…So read if you want to laugh along with us!

[A/N. Goes to objective POV after first line]

JAGGER'S BIG SURPRISE

"Alexander!" I exclaimed, and fell into his arms.

"Just as I thought!" Jagger proclaimed, as if he'd won a contest. "I knew she'd bring you to me! Though I don't see how you're attracted to her and not me… my eyes tend to sparkle more… but whatever! She brought you to me!"

Alexander and Raven let out a simultaneous gasp. "Whoa," Alexander said under his breath.

"Well… you really can't be surprised. I mean, just look at what he's wearing… and his hair! I mean, ugh!" Raven said to Alexander.

"Hey! Watch yourself! Paolo made this hair into a masterpiece!" Jagger shot at Raven. "I've been told it brings out the alignment in my face!" He added.

"Weren't we just about to get into a fight or something?" Alexander asked completely confused at the turn of conversation.

"Right. Uhh, where was I…? Oh! Right! I knew Raven would lead me to you!" Jagger proclaimed, again.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa! Hold up!" Raven interrupted. Both boys looked at her. "Jagger. Like really! I'll be your night bride or whatever—Or wait, your gay. Umm, I'll send you a check for your next hair appointment with Paolo or whoever-"

She was interrupted by Jagger. "You would do that… for me?"

Raven continued. "Of course! But I haven't seen this dark hottie in a long time. So can I just please like pause this little quarrel for maybe 5, 10, 20 minutes…? I just really need to kiss him. I mean, don't you? Just look at him! I'm surprised someone's not cooking eggs on him cause he's HOT!" Raven finished.

Jagger considered this while Alexander sat behind and watched, a little confused. "My next hair appointment? Really?" Raven nodded. "Fine! But I want the check first!"

"Not a problem!" Raven finished through her bag and found her checkbook. "Who do I make it out to?" She asked.

"Oh, umm… make it out to Paolo's beauty perfectionists. It would be around forty-five dollars."

Alexander zoned out as they mumbled about their arrangement. He heard a bunch of "mhms" and "uh huhs".

"Okay, so now can I have my lip action with Alexander?" Raven asked as he stuffed the check into his back pocket.

"Only if I get him after…" Jagger said, wiggling his eyebrows.

"Ew." Alexander and Raven said at the same time.

Jagger shrugged as Raven and Alexander entered a passionate kiss. After about five minutes, Jagger cleared his throat.

"Oh sorry… forgot." Raven mumbled.

Jagger then lunged at Alexander. "My turn now! Kiss me, you fool!"

"What the…" Alexander said while Jagger's motions were processing. With one quick motion from Alexander, Jagger was on the floor. But, in a moment, he was ready to pounce again.

"Raven, leave!" Alexander shouted at Raven wanting to protect her from the fight that was about to arise.

"Are you kidding me? This is better than cable!" Raven replied back, suddenly pulling popcorn out of her bag. "Plus, he's not after my lips!"
"So you turn down my sister and me!" Jagger yelled about to attack.

"Yup. That about sums it up. I'm sure you'd get the same answer about your brother and your parents." Alexander said, fighting Jagger off. They started retreating into the forest. The last thing Raven heard from them was Jagger screaming, "LOVE ME!" Then Alexander screaming, "NEVER!"

Raven sat there alone. "Well, damn. Shows over? What kind of crap is that?"