Hey Everybody! I know, I know, this is most certainly not Band of Brothers - honestly it's far, far from it. But there are times when a plot bunny drags you down an unbeaten path and there's just no going back. This is definitely a road less traveled for me, but the journey has been intriguing. :) All of our favorite guys are here - or will be as the story moves along. Plus, we have an unusual canon character, my favorite OC's and a few new ones.

I'maMePanda has been a great help in this and she's a pretty amazing friend too. ;) I'd tap dance my thanks out to her, if one could do that and if I was that talented, because that'd be cool, right? But sadly, I am *not* that talented, so me shouting my thank you to her across the internet will have to do for now. (and if you haven't read her stuff, what the hey are you waiting for?!)

Hopefully you find this as intriguing to read as I have found it to write. Reviews are wishes come true, so please toss your pennies in the well of fiction. ;)

**S4S**

Staring at the overflowing trunk of the sedan, Hannah pushed a lock of dark blonde hair out of her brown eyes and sighed. She pulled two duffle bags off the pile of bags, suitcases and small boxes and dropped them on the ground near her feet. Feeling the tears threatening again, she sucked in a deep breath and bit her lip. After only a moment, she swallowed hard and closed the trunk down. At least it closed this time, she thought, bending to grab the duffle bags. Standing up, a small smile crossed her face as she saw Buck, on his knees, looking out the back window of the car. He was waving at her, a big grin on his face. She couldn't wave back with her hands full, so she made a silly face, and giggling, he turned back around, flopping into his seat.

He reminded her so much of Zach.

The familiar hurt pricked at her heart and she stuffed the memories away, walking around the car and squishing the bags she held into what little room was left on the front seat.

"You all ready, Baby?" She looked into the back at her dark haired, tall for his age son and he grinned again.

"Sure, Mama. You packed my clothes..." he trailed off, waiting for her to continue the silly routine, born from one too many moves and very few possessions.

"And you packed your toys," she finished, watching her youngest nod and hold up the small Star Wars bag on his lap. She smiled at him, while fighting against the thoughts that berated her. Her inability to give the boys even small pleasures warred with the suffocating pressures of responsibility in general. She needed to...needed...She backed away from the car, slamming the door.

This was the right thing to do... This was the right...it was!

"Mama, are you ok?" Buck climbed over bags and a large suitcase that was in the middle, to look out the window at her. Summoning every last ounce of courage she had, Hannah nodded.

"'Course I am, Baby. Where's Chris?" She asked, reaching out to run a finger down his cheek.

He studied her a moment before answering. Guilt tugged at her at the intensity of her child's look, and still looking concerned, he answered, "Inside, Mama. He's been there all morning." The boy didn't say 'just like always', but the words hung in the air and she sighed.

"Stay here, Buck. We'll be right back."

Adjusting the light coat over her shoulders, Hannah stepped back, turned on her heel and headed into the small motel room. They'd stayed here for the last five weeks. It had been one of the nicer places they'd been, but like always, nothing was really home. And once they'd said their goodbyes to Jane and Heather, it was all driving and one night stays until they reached...until they got to...his house. This was the right thing. This was...oh, but was it?

Was this the right thing? Resisting the urge to grab her head in frustration, she stepped into the little room that served as both bedroom and living room, heart breaking at the miserable picture her oldest made. Knees tucked to his chest, arms wrapped tight around them, he sat on the bed, facing away from her. His small Colorado Rockies bag sat next to him, everything he owned aside from clothes stuffed inside.

"Cowboy?" The dark blonde teen hunched his shoulders tighter and didn't respond. He swore he hated the nickname, but Hannah knew better. Still, she only used it in moments like these. When another few moments stretched out with no response from the sulking thirteen year old, Hannah walked across the small space and set her hand on her oldest's shoulder. "We gotta go, Darling. Grammy Jane and Heather are meeting us for lunch, remember?"

"Not hungry." The mumbled words were more angry than upset and Hannah bit back a reply that would've only caused more balking.

"You don't have to eat, Cowboy, but you need to get in the car." The boy shook his head, hugging tighter to his knees, where his face was still buried. Hannah sighed softly and sat on the bed, rubbing at the boy's shoulder.

"Chris, we have to go. You know checkout is eleven. Even if we didn't have a new place to go, we can't stay here." It was not the first time she'd had these talks with Chris but she was hoping it would be one of the last for awhile. She felt the boy tense again and then he slowly released his hold on his knees. He let his feet fall to the floor and slid a sideways glance at her, pulling away from her touch.

"Why? Why do we have to go...there?" His tone was no less angry than before, but he was moving, so she bit her lip again, choosing to ignore the tone as she fought the overwhelming desire to call it quits and simply stay in the car. It wouldn't be the first time. No...this was so there would be no more sleeping in the car.

Every move was tough, but they'd get through it. They always did.

Chris shifted next to her, getting to his feet and throwing his bag over his shoulder. He turned to face her as she stood. She forced a smile, thankful this was not one of the times he simply refused to move at all, and put a hand out to run over his hair. But he stepped back, a glare she was all too familiar with replacing the sullen look he'd been wearing, and she crossed her arms over her stomach in a fight not to pull at her own hair.

"Cowboy? You ready?" She asked the question on reflex, trying to calm the barrage of thoughts racing freely in her frenzied mind.

"Why?!" He demanded softly in response, still angry. Ignoring his question, she turned slightly, looking out the window. Why? Why? She wasn't even sure anymore. Surely in nearly twenty years, her father had to have softened...he'd said yes when she'd called. Hadn't lectured nearly as long as she'd thought he would when she told him about the boys. This really was the right thing.

Wasn't it?

Her arms unfolded from her stomach, one hand moving to her mouth as she started to bite her nails, the other grabbing a small tendril of hair and tugging hard. Once and then again...and again-

She pulled harder as the emotional ebb and flow became stronger, tugging and dragging her to the brink of -

"Mama?" Chris's voice, no longer angry, pulled at her from far away and she focused hard, her child's voice a lifeline, the only thing keeping the ocean of black depth from sucking her in.

Chris watched his mother, concern flickering steadily in blue eyes. He'd long since figured out when his Mama was really aware and when she wasn't. He knew the signs, was aware of how she changed, becoming more...entranced as she fell deeper into her own mind. Chris would never tell her he knew, and he did everything he could to keep Buck from knowing. There were some things you just didn't share with anyone.

"I'm ready, Mama." He whispered, reaching out cautiously to touch the hand she had in her mouth and pull gently at it.

He watched closely, one hand still on hers and felt relief wash over him when she pulled herself back from whatever darkness was grabbing at her. She released her hair, and blinked several times before looking at at him.

Adjusting his bag with one hand, he held out his hand to her. She hesitated only a moment longer, looking around their most recent home one last time, before taking her son's hand and heading out of the motel room.