Title: The Lollipop Guild
Author: Lady_Lyonnesse
Rating: T+ (for threatening situations with munchkins!)
Summary: After consuming a batch of Quinn's 'special' brownies, Haley decides to call Dean... who drags Adam (as the only available younger brother) off to check that a) they're not possessed and b) they're not damaging the house, nearly running over Castiel on the way.
Author's Note: So as you may know, I do prefer Brooke & Sam to Peyton & Sam but this is a continuation from a fic idea inspired by my wonderful cousin/sister/older me whereby Haley, Brooke and Peyton had enough of the Scott men and went on holiday in a haunted house only to be rescued by the Winchester men. So, in continuation with that, the pairings are; Dean/Haley, Peyton/Sam and Brooke/Adam (a guilty pleasure I can't resist!).
It was also inspired by 7x08 when Haley and Brooke ate the special brownies. I died laughing. Twice.
With that in mind... enjoy!
"So, do you think they're possessed?" Adam asked as he and his elder brother Dean hurtled along the highway as fast as the Impala would let them.
"I don't know – well, take a listen." Dean said, chucking Adam his phone.
"You have one voicemail" the woman's monotonous voice informed Adam's ear. "Hey honey!" Adam recoiled sharply as the voicemail lady was replaced by his very, very loud almost-sister-in-law. "Just wanted to ask when did the Lollipop Guild become a Trade Union and was it the fact that they wanted short hours, longer sticks or different flavours that prompted them to do so?"
"Haley! That munchkin is staring at me again!" even with the phone held about an arm's length from his ear, Adam could still hear Brooke's protestations as clear as if she and Haley were arguing in the back of the Impala.
"N'aww! Maybe he likes you! You should go talk to him! HEY! You can get married! And have babies! And I can be god-mother!"
"Shut UP Hales, I am not marrying that psycho! "
"Oh yeah, I forgot... you like Adam don't you?" If Adam hadn't been incredibly embarrassed, he would've found the total innocence with which Haley declared that statement hilarious. He glanced over to Dean, who was thankfully still focussing on making the Impala go at warp speed rather than listening.
"HALEY!" Brooke's scandalised shriek suddenly shot up in volume and sounds of scuffles could be heard on the other end of the line.
"NO! BROOKE! STOP IT YOU'RE GOING TO BREAK THE DAMN PHONE! IT'S ONLY DEAN!"
"WHO'S BROTHERS WITH ADAM TRAITOR-GIRL!"
"HE WON'T TELL! You won't tell, will you baby?" Haley suddenly simpered, assumingly directing the question at her poor boyfriend at the receiving end. "Well, gotta go baby, love you - BROOKE DON'T HIT THE MUNCHKIN WITH THAT BAT! IT'S JAMIE'S-" The line cut off. Adam sat there in stunned silence, his eardrums ringing.
"Wow." He said, feeling lost for words. "I guess Jamie's not gonna be playing in the little league team this year, huh?"
"Screw the little league team, my girlfriend's gone insane and Brooke Davis is running around my house with a goddamn BAT!" Dean growled. Adam almost rolled his eyes. When the Winchesters first met up with Brooke Davis, Peyton Sawyer, Haley James and her son, Jamie, they'd figured that the Supernatural world wasn't gonna let them stroll in and out of the Winchester's lives as they pleased. And after quite a few attacks - notably when all of them ended up covered in green goo after a monster had accidentally been impaled by Brooke's stiletto and promptly exploded - Bobby had consented for them to stay with him. That was when other problems had begun to appear. Dean, now an item with Haley and practically a father to Jamie, didn't want them to get mixed up in his work. Haley disagreed. This 'discussion' continued for a period of five weeks, during which Adam was extremely grateful for the weird music that Peyton had brought with her and the volume at which she played it. Eventually Bobby decided enough was enough and pulled a few strings to get them a five bedroom house in Kansas. It looked like a nice, normal family home – not counting the devils traps underneath the 'Welcome' mat, the salt based mixture around the window frames and the iron fillings worked into the walls. Needless to say, it provided a safe place for them to stay – and Dean had become increasingly protective over one of the only 'normal' things in his life.
"Dude, slow down – I'm sure Haley has the situation under control!" Adam said, as the Impala swerved violently to the right.
"Dude, did that voice mail message sound REMOTELY like the situation was under control?" Dean demanded. Adam closed his eyes and wished that Sam was here and not at the seaside with Peyton and Jamie – he did the whole calming thing a lot better than Adam. Adam tended to be like Dean in that they just got pissed off.
"MIND THE DAMN ROAD!" Adam yelled as the Impala once again swerved violently in an attempt to remain on the highway.
"I DON'T NEED YOU TO TELL ME HOW TO DRIVE MY OWN DAMN CAR!" Dean barked at him. Adam took a deep breath.
"CAS!"
(* * * * *Later* * * * *)
About half an hour later, wherein they'd cheated death at least twice, destroyed a newly painted picket fence and nearly run over an Angel of the Lord, Adam and Dean arrived at the Kansas house.
"Rock salt?" Dean asked.
"Check." Adam affirmed, cocking the gun.
"Holy water?"
"Check."
"Tranquiliser?"
"... Why do we need a tranquiliser?"
"Isn't it obvious?" Dean demanded, looking at Adam like he was speaking French.
"No, Dean. You are NOT shooting Brooke with a trank dart!" Adam told him.
"It's either a trank dart to the face or a bullet!" Dean muttered.
"Dean!"
"Oh fine!" Dean snapped. "But if there's so much of a scratch on that wallpaper, just because you want to get into Brooke's panties, so help me I will kick your ass to Florida!" he stated, before striding up to the door – Adam taking a few seconds to splutter indignantly before following.
"You knock." He stated.
"No, you knock!" Dean replied.
"Why should I knock?" Adam demanded.
"Because I'm the oldest and I say so!" Dean argued.
"Exactly, I've got more life to live!" Adam shot back – though the glare that Dean bestowed upon him, highly suggested otherwise. "Fine!" Adam said, resigning himself to a fate worse than death and preparing to knock. He'd only half raised his fist however, before the door flew open and before Adam knew it, Brooke had flung herself on him, almost knocking both of them backwards.
"ADAM!" she cried, burying her face into his neck.
"Brooke?" Adam asked, patting her on the back awkwardly; unsure of where to put his hands. "What happened?"
"Quinn invited her fortune teller round and Haley was really, really rude so she cursed us and now there's something in the house with Haley!" Brooke gabbled into his shoulder. Adam looked at Dean for help, but he'd already disappeared in the house, yelling Haley's name.
"Erm, what about you Brooke? Are you okay?" Adam asked, trying to act more natural. Before Brooke could reply, a very relieved Dean and an exasperated Haley appeared at the front door. Brooke released Adam – much to Adam's relief – and looked at Haley, expectantly.
"Cuniculus!" she declared, waving an electronic devise in the air. "Oryctolagus Cuniculus! Latin for bunny rabbit!" On cue, Dean produced white bunny rabbit, looking quite grumpy – though that could be because Dean was holding it by the ears. Brooke stared at it open mouthed.
"That Zelda's a BITCH!"
The End. Yeah, I know it's short – sorry, but I hope you enjoyed it anyway!