Okay no, I have honestly no idea what this is. Just a really random one shot I guess.

It's really late and I have no idea if half of what I wrote even makes sense or whatever but I just wanted to upload it.

And yeah - for some reason it's kind of Christmas-y even though it's February.

haha okay whatever. Enjoy reading :)

It's Christmas Eve. People all over the world are occupied preparing Christmas dinners, wrapping presents or decorating the tree, while Serena feels like she would rather just skip Christmas because this year she's just tired of hearing people talk about the season of love and giving. She's sick of reading those pathetic Christmas cards from people she doesn't even know and she's sick of people trying to convince her that she's supposed to spend Christmas with her family.

After being bored out of her mind for hours in her room at Chuck's hotel, the most exciting part of her day being watching the The Hills - Christmas Special on TV, she gets tired of it and decides she has to get out of there. She has no idea where to go so she ends up walking all the way to the apartment her mother owns. Why she's doing it? She honestly doesn't know. But for some reason she thinks that she might feel at home there.

She finds him sitting in the living room of the van der Woodsen (-Humphrey/Bass) apartment and it makes her smile because of course, Dan too, rejected Lily and Rufus' offer to come to Aspen with them. The whole family was supposed to go but for some reason, even though she knows she really shouldn't feel like this because she hasn't seen her mother this happy in years, she's still not liking the fact that they now all are one big, supposedly happy family. She really doesn't know why - Rufus is a really great guy and he makes her mom smile like no other husband of Lily's ever has, Jenny is a nice girl and Dan is her friend (or something like that). Still it just doesn't feel right. A family is supposed to feel different, or so she thinks. She's never had a real one before after all.

Ironic, she thinks, that the first time she's alone with him again is on Christmas Eve. The past few months they've both been so caught up in their own busy lives that she can't even remember the last time they had a conversation that went beyond a polite how are you? So she thinks that this might be the perfect opportunity to change that.

Dan obviously didn't notice her getting out of the elevator because when she's standing next to him, lightly tapping his shoulder, he looks up at her in shock, accidentally letting the book he's reading slip off of his lap and onto the floor.

"Se-Serena! What are you doing here? I mean I'd like to think you came here to see me but you couldn't have known I'd be here so… uhh sorry I'll just stop talking. Why don't you sit down?" He laughs nervously, while she lets herself fall down on the couch next to him, her golden curls spreading out on the pillow behind her.

"I was just.. just" bored in my hotel room and hoping that somebody would be here so I'd feel less lonely. "in the neighborhood I guess. But it's really good to see you… we haven't talked in a while." A little giggle escapes her lips and for a moment he forgets to think or talk because he has to admit to himself that yes, he's missed seeing her face light up when she's giggling the way only Serena can - the sort of giggle that makes you smile just at the sound of it. He catches himself staring at her lips a mere second later and quickly looks away, hoping she didn't notice.

"Yeah well I've been pretty busy with college and…" He trails off because he really doesn't know why he hasn't talked to her in weeks but he's sure he couldn't have been that busy.

"And Vanessa? I've heard some crazy rumors about the two of you.. and a threesome?" She lightly hits his arm before starting to laugh. She obviously doesn't believe any of the things Gossip Girl is trying to convince her of being the truth.

Dan laughs in a nervous, uneasy way. He really hopes Serena won't notice the way he suddenly tensed up because he really wants her to believe that it's all just a rumor. Actually, he wants to believe it's all just a rumor himself because really? What was he thinking?

But she knows him too well as that he could just hide something from her. Her mouth gapes open in shock and her eyes go wide.

"Wait. No way! Please don't tell me that's true.. Dan Humphrey, the shy guy, in a threesome?" She stops laughing but still looks like she thinks it's funny how he's blushing now. "Where's the Dan I used to date? You know the one who was even freaked out by the Ice Capades?"

It takes him a while to register what she just said. This is off limits for them - no references to their shared past. She caught him off guard with it and he really doesn't know how to react.

"I- I just… Things have been just so… so weird lately."

"Yeah I think I can relate…"

For a moment they just look at each other. He notices that she seems to be a little uncomfortable talking to him and immediately wants to slap himself for not being there for her the past few months. He doesn't know her as well as he used to anymore but he knows something big must've happened in her life; something that changed her in ways only he would notice.

---

They're both uneasy and even though she supposes that it's normal to be like that when you haven't talked to a person in a while, she feels like since she knows a way to change that, she should.

"You know we should be celebrating!" she blurts out enthusiastically and he's once again amazed at how easy it seems to be for her to go from talking about serious things to being all 4 year old on Christmas morning euphoric.

"And why's that?" he laughs.

"Well it is Christmas Eve after all. And now that you're here and I'm not alone anymore, I think we should have some fun." For a brief second he wonders if he's the only one of them who feels like what she just suggested sounds really inappropriate. But of course he knows that she didn't mean it like that so he quickly dismisses the thought.

"Okay… well what did you have in mind then?" She smirks a little (he wonders when she started doing that, not that he minds) and bites her lip as if she's thinking about something and really if he didn't know better, he'd think she's trying to seduce him.

"Well… since option A is not even an option, there's only option B. We should get obnoxiously drunk and fill each other in on all of the stuff we missed in each other's lives." She looks into his eyes, trying to figure out whether he's up for it or not but she can't quite read his expression out. "And by the time it'll be Christmas Morning, we'll both already have passed out drunk but that's beside the point." She giggles uncontrollably while he still considers whether this is such a good idea (more like pretends to consider it because it's really hard to say no to a giggling Serena). He also really wants to know what option A is but figures there's probably a reason why she's not telling him.

"Okay. I'm in."

She squeals in delight and engulfs him in a quick hug before getting up and walking towards the kitchen, only to return a few minutes later, carrying a tray full of shot glasses, a bottle of tequila, salt and a plate of lime slices.

He shakes his head slightly in disbelief, laughing a little at what they're about to do. This is so crazy and so her and he's missed her crazy, spontaneous ideas so much, that he can't wait to see where this goes.

"How about we make this a little more interesting… wanna play 'I never …'? Makes it easier to catch up…" She sets the tray down on the table in front of them and sits down next to him again.

"Only if you go first." He laughs, while she pours tequila in some of the shot glasses. She puts some salt on her hand and thinks about what she could possibly say. She decides that she should start with the part that's the hardest for her because if she won't, she'll probably not say it at all.

"I never…" she hesitates for a moment. "I never went looking for my father last summer with Carter Baizen only to find out that he doesn't want to know me." She licks the salt off of her hand, quickly drinks a shot of tequila and bites into one of the lime slices.

"You.. wait. You went looking for your father?" He has no idea what to say.

"No time for questions. It's your turn. It's not fair if you don't drink right after me." She laughs and even though he notices that there's a little bit of sadness in it, he decides it's probably better to not bring it up again.

So instead he licks his hand, puts some salt on it and takes a shot glass into the other hand, prepared to say something that would be totally embarrassing to admit to anyone but somehow isn't with her.

"I never hooked up with Georgina Sparks at some College Party which resulted in her stalking me with animated E-Cards and nearly ruining our parents wedding."

He licks, drinks and sucks.

She giggles a little. It's so Georgina-like to do something like that. She opens her mouth slightly, about to say something, when he interrupts her.

"No questions, remember?" She fake-frowns but totally gives herself away with her giggles. As she prepares her next shot, she's hoping they'll soon feel the alcohol because she knows all of the things they're about to say aren't exactly things you'd just tell somebody sober.

"I never had an affair with a married politician and was actually naïve enough to believe he'd leave Maureen- I mean his wife - for me."

Dan's eyes widen a little because of course he's read about that on Gossip Girl but he didn't actually think it was true. The blast had also said that she'd been drunk driving when she got into the car accident because she was upset about Tripp choosing Maureen over her, which had been one of the particular reasons why he didn't believe it.

But he quickly recovers from the little shock, remembering that they both agreed not to ask any question or comment on the others mistakes. Besides - he's really in no position to judge her because the decisions he's made over the past year aren't exactly things he's proud of either.

"I never had a threesome with my now ex girlfriend and one of my best friends just because of some stupid article about all of the things you should have done before you graduate college."

It takes a lot of effort for her to not just burst out laughing because what he just said totally reminds her of some creepy cliché teen flick. It actually sounds a lot like a crossover between Eurotrip and American Pie, she decides. But she's kind of already a little tipsy so she eventually can't help but start to laugh.

"I'm sorry." More giggles follow. He doesn't know why but her laugh is just so contagious that a moment later, he's laughing too.

"Okay let's both.." She tries to think of what she was gonna say but only notices that thinking and Tequila don't really go together. "uhhh… I don't remember." She covers her mouth with her hand and giggles even more.

"Let's drink some more Tequila maybe? Maybe that'll make you remember.." He has no idea why he just said that because normal he's so not the drinking kinda guy but with her it seems like fun.

She gives him a challenging look.

"How about we make things a little more interesting?" she licks her lips. "The one of us who can drink three tequila shots faster than the other will…" she has no idea what the winner will do.

"Will be too drunk to even remember we had this conversation?" Dan laughs.

"Well we'll both be that drunk cause we're both drinking the shots - one of us will just be faster. And I thought you were so smart.." she gives him a fake-disappointed look.

"Okay whatever. Let's just do it. Like you said, it's Christmas Eve and we should be celebrating." He winks at her while preparing for their little competition and she winks back before putting three shot glasses for each of them on the table. They both put on their competitive faces and take the first shot into their hands.

"No lime, no salt." Serena says, concentrating on the shot glass in her hand. "Ready?" he nods. "GO."

He starts off a second faster than she does but after drinking the first shot, he coughs so she passes him. In the end he's done just a second after she is.

"wooohooo!" She squeals and applauds herself. "I won which means you lose… which means I can decide what you",she points her finger at him," have to doooo." She throws herself at him and hugs him real close to her. He's totally caught off guard but hugs her back. She giggles in a kind of drunk-but-cute way and the only thing he can think is that her hair smells like the chocolate shampoo he knows she loves to use.

Soon he joins her and starts laughing too. At first it feels weird, just laughing for no reason, but they're both in the happy phase of oblivious drunkenness and know they should enjoy it as long as it lasts. (After all, they'll probably enter the deeply depressed phase soon enough.)

"Why are we even laughing?" He says after a while, still laughing while he does.

"I don't knoooohoooow.." she laughs even louder, if possible, than she did before.

He decides it really doesn't matter as long as they're doing it together.

---

A while later - they both have no idea how long they've been sitting on that couch, laughing, occasionally drinking even more Tequila and once in a while hugging - he notices that she stopped laughing and is crying now. They're hugging again when he does. There's a thin line between happy drunk and sad drunk, and he knows that even trying not to cry doesn't work. So he just pulls her closer to him and tries to hug her sadness away. Of course that probably won't work but in his drunken mind, this is the best thing to do in a situation like this.

She's crying even harder now and he feels bad for not being able to make her feel better. It sort of scares him to see her like this because Serena never cries unless something is really wrong. But she's drunk - even though she kept insisting on being totally sober between giggling and laughing earlier - and so he figures she's only crying because of that. He doesn't know what to say or do because he's actually pretty drunk himself and handling something as serious as this is way too hard for him right now.

"Hey! It'll all be okay!" He actually doesn't know what he's even talking about but what else is he supposed to say? "I mean it's Christmas Eve and it's not snowing and I'm not complaining either, am I? You know how much I love snow.. I miss snow." He's pretty sure that actually made sense but she detangled herself from him, stopped sobbing and is looking at him like are you serious? now.

She studies his face for a moment, before she smiles.

"You're smiling. Why are you smiling?" he laughs again. He's glad she does but he'd also really love to know why.

"I don't know!" She's laughing too now and he wants to take a picture of her like this - her eyes still red from crying, while she's laughing like she didn't just cry two minutes ago - so that he'll never forget.

"I'm tired." Serena simply states, gets up and takes a step forward, only to fall back down on the couch. She giggles and looks at him with puppy dog eyes. "Walk me to my room? I don't think I'll find it on my own." He smiles at her (because how could any male ever resist her if she looked at him like this?), gets up and extends his hand to her.

"Sure." She takes his hand and gets up too, giggling as she does. He takes her to her (now Jenny's) room and even pulls the covers back for her, making sure she'll be okay. She lies down - still wearing the pair of jeans and the shirt she's been wearing all day - and immediately closes her eyes.

He turns around, thinking she's already asleep, and starts slowly walking towards the door, when he hears her mumble something in protest.

"Hey! Don't leave me! You have to sleep here - with me." He walks back over to the bed, a little hesitant to actually sleep in one bed with her. She's drunk he keeps trying to tell himself - what if she'll wake up tomorrow morning regretting this? But then again, it's not like he's sober either so he just lies down next to her, pulling the covers up over them.

She puts her head on his chest and without even thinking about it, he puts an arm around her.

"I'm wasted.." she mumbles and laughs.

"Yeah you are.." He chuckles a little - it's funny how she's just realizing that now (though he didn't notice how drunk he really is before either). "But I am too…"

He's just about to fall asleep, when she leans over and kisses his cheek.

"Merry Christmas!" she giggles and closes her eyes again, falling asleep before he even gets the chance to reply.

He falls asleep just a moment later, thinking that he's glad he spent Christmas Eve with the one person he likes spending it with most.

When she wakes up the next morning with an enormous headache, she looks out of the window and it's snowing.