Perfection is not something that comes straight after a war

Chapter 1

I sat there staring out the window at the orchard where Ron, Hermione, Harry and I had played quidditch all those years ago. Those days seem so easy now looking back, I suppose they were for me but Harry... he already knew his future...Voldemort. To Harry I suppose he thought that would be it, nothing more nothing less. But for me there was more I could have been anyone I wanted, had anyone I wanted and I suppose I did. I had Harry. For those brief months everything was almost perfect, I loved him, he loved me.

But then the war happened and although we won, I felt like I'd lost... I felt like I'd lost him. He was my Harry whilst we mourned for the dead. But then they wanted to know the story. The world wanted to know. Harry became everyone else's but not mine. Harry was being what people wanted him to be. The perfect hero. Overnight he became an overly romantic, overly helpful and overly open about everything that had happened but I missed the socially awkward boy I feel in love with.

I spoke to Hermione about it but to her he was the same. I was the only one who noticed the change and I understood. He wanted to please everyone. To be that person they wanted him to be but somewhere along the way I got left behind. And I had to understand this.

I was sitting in the leaky caldron waiting, he was an hour late it was the third time we had rescheduled that week. I was almost ready to leave when he came in. That black scruffy hair, those emerald green eyes hidden behind the glasses that had seen so much. I sat back and looked for the boy I knew but I couldn't see him...

"Hello Ginny... I'm sorry I'm late..." Harry muttered, he was holding a bunch of red roses.

I stood up. He was out of breath and it reminded me of the way he would be after a quidditch match but there wasn't that same glint in his eyes.

"It's alright Harry, I know they need you but I needed you too" Harry looked confused then the look of realisation came over his eyes. He understood. He didn't follow, and tell me he still and always would love me. I carried on walking until I found the one place I knew I would able to let myself go from the restraint of crying. Luna's apartment.

I remember crying into her soft almost white hair and her reassuring me that this feeling would pass I think I must have fallen asleep because the next thing I remember was Luna passing me a mug of girdy roots and telling me to drink. I did so, it was then I noticed Neville starring at me he look concerned and that scared me. No one had looked at me that way for years. It felt odd to think someone still cared about me. That day Mum picked me up from Luna's and took me back to the borrow. We did not speak but to me that meant more than mindless, meaningless consoling. Mum understood and that's why I loved her.

The weeks went by in a bluer I stayed at the borrow and it almost felt like it would when I was home the summer when I went to Hogwarts. I would sit in the garden, in the orchard, on the hills, on my windowsill. That's where I am now sitting and remembering, trying to forget.

Chapter 2

I saw them first Ron, Hermione and Harry they where unmistakable walking over the hills toward my one safe place. I sat and watched them coming closer and closer then I heard the faint whisper of their chatter. I could sometimes make out a disjointed sentence. Then...

"Do you think she'll be here?" The first thing I properly heard coming from his lips, he didn't even have the decency to say my name.

"Probably Harry. You can't just hide from her the rest of your life" Hermione had always had a great way of putting things. This made me laugh. This was a mistake because all three faces looked up right at me. They knew I was listening. Harry had gone as pale as a ghost. I jumped of my window seat and ran downstairs and out the back door. He could not be here not with them. My own brother had not spoken to me in weeks while Hermione was I think convinced I was going mental. Maybe I was. No no I'm not! I kept on running. I heard the door swing back open and my name being shouted. I recognised his voice. I ran toward the orchard. I was out of breath, tears where in my eyes. I was angry with myself. I wanted to turn round. Go to him, be in his arms but those weren't the arms of the boy I loved.

I stopped running and I climbed up into the nearest tree and sat there watching them watching him walk towards the orchard. His eyes where gleaming as he looked up at me. He was up in my tree so quickly.

"Ginny" Harry was looking at me. I was a wreak. I wish someone did not have this much control over my feelings. I hated him, I loved him, I wanted him but yet I didn't. Was this even possible. I wiped my eyes and looked at him.

"Ginny, I'm sorry I should have never let go of you go, I wish...I wish I had gone after you, told you I loved you, I wish I had never changed for them, they wanted someone I'm not. I needed to be there for you. I still and always will love you Ginny..." His eyes said more than anything he just said. They were the same but more intense than when he first kissed me.

"You left me thinking you didn't want me anymore. How can I be sure?" I whispered looking away from his gaze. His hands cupped my face forcing me to look at him but I resisted.

"Ginny Wesley what I felt when I watched you walk away from me makes me want to never let go of you" Harry was coming closer but I still forced myself to look away "Ginny look at me please" Harry pleaded

"No harry, No you left me feeling like a spare part for weeks, I felt betrayed and I still stayed by you because I tried to understand. But harry I can't just forgive you, I thought you knew me better than that just to think I would forgive you and it would all be ok."

"Ginny please I said I'm sorry what more can I do" Harry was almost in tears

"Good bye Harry"

I walked away from the orchard, It felt like I was walking away from my life but I knew that Luna was right, this feeling would pass. I just hopped it would be soon.

"Ginny..." Hermione look so concerned so worried "What happened?"

I gave a small smile "I can't just let him think its all ok, and I'm sick of people thinking I'm fine with it"

"Ginny, I'm sorry I did not believe I should have been there for you" Hermione looked so sorry

"Its fine I...I... got to go, I need to start living my own life and not trying to be in someone else's" Ron finally looked at me he look so confused, as if he did not know how or what to feel. And to be honest I did not blame him. Then I saw mum, she was watching me as if she expected me to at any moment collapse in tears, but for some reason I did not feel weepy or sad, I just felt empty and I suppose for me that was worse. I to one last look at the home I had grew up in and I knew I could not return there for a very long time, because he would be here. And I disapperated

Chapter 3

1 Month later

I had settled into my new London apartment it was right in the centre 10mins away from any major muggle place. I loved it. I could see that large circular thing by the river that dad had once taken me round when I was younger, it made me smile to think of that day.

I still felt empty but I felt like a different more self reliant person, the first time mum came to visit she kept staring at me still convinced I saw going to burst into tears but the truth was I could not, I'd cried so much the first time I lost him I had nothing left inside me thus I think the empty feeling. Luna had virtually come round every day to my now that Neville was back teaching at Hogwarts she helped me unpack, decorate and everything. She found a box of old photos of Hogwarts memories, nearly all the photos were of Harry and I before the war when we where well I was happy. Luna asked what I wanted to do with it I told her to leave it in the corner of my bed room and there it stays untouched with a thin layer of dust of top.

Hermione visited , she acted like everything was normal but we both knew he was going to come up in the convocation so I just said "Look Hermione say what you came here to say" she looked surprised but relived.

"Ok, look Ginny everyone is worried about you, Harry's gone practically crazy with worry about what you're going to do and Ron well just after you left he went barmey at Harry for being such a twat and letting you go" Hermione's worry was not evident all over her face

I sighed "I know people are worried about me but you've all known me all my life so you should know I'm stronger that I look and Harry got what was coming to him, I'm glad Ron finally snapped" Hermione was obviously disappointed with the reply I had given her.

"Come on Ginny, that's exactly why we're all worried about you, we know you. And your honestly 100% telling me you no longer love Harry and you could never forgive him" That took me by surprise I'd never thought about whether I still actually loved Harry or not and I thought or the box in the corner of my room sitting there . I got up and went to get it. "What are you doing" Hermione asked studying every inch of my face. I ignored her and came back with the box, I placed it on the table in-between us both and I opened it. On top was a photo, it was a photo someone, I could not remember who had taken when Harry had first kissed me. I looked at it and finally I no longer felt empty I felt as if my whole world had come crashing down and instead of Harry being there to protect me my world was crushing me, killing me. I finally started to cry. Hermione just watched as I cried over that photo then she bought what looked like one of that muggle phone thingys out of her pocket and she put it to her ear.

"Send him over" That all Hermione said but I knew who he was. I got up and tried to rub away my tears but she stopped me "Just because I was on Harry's side does not mean I think he does not deserve to suffer, let him see you like this and then he'll know the damage he has done" Hermione smiled, I let out a tiny giggle. Then the door bell went and Hermione had disapperated.

Chapter 4

I opened the door and there he stood his black scruffy hair, his emerald green eyes. I flung my arms round his neck and cried for the first time in front of him, he led me to my sofa closing my front door behind us and laid me on his chest as he whispered every kind of apology possible. When I finally stopped crying I looked up into his eyes and there in those eyes I was my Harry my one and only love.

"Ginny I don't blame you for leaving me and I understand why. I love you so much I can't bear to let you go ever again" Harry looked so worried that I was going to tell him to get out my apartment, to leave me allow that I could not help but give a little smile.

"Harry Potter if you leave me now I don't know what I'd do" I whispered. Then Harry was kissing me like never before.

Harry spent the night at my apartment then the day then the week until one day I told him he should just move in, so he did. Months turned into a year and on New Years Eve Harry, Hermione, Ron and I where by the river and at Midnight Harry took me to one side.

"Ginny Wesley, I think we can both agree we've gone through hell and back but despite all the rubbish we've been through I am still desperately and will always be in love with you so will you marry me?" Harry was down on one knee showing me the most beautiful engagement ring I had ever seen, I was so happy and astonished that I almost forgot to say

"Yes, of course Harry, I love you sooo much"

Chapter 5

2 years later

"I can't believe we've been married for almost a year and a half already!" Harry said lacing his fingers in-between Ginny's

"I know but it's really not been the long" Ginny giggled, she was so happy, everything had turned out perfectly, Harry and her wedding had been elegant and secret from the public until a week after so they would not get stalked by the profit. And now this, her perfect family was finally coming along. "Ow Harry guess what?"

"What sweet-heart?" Harry looked down at her and she gave him a massive smile and lifted her top just over her belly, there was a little bump "What a minute?" Harry smiled putting his hand on the bump

"Yep! I'm pregnant! To be quite honest I was surprised no one noticed this week end but i.." Harry cut Ginny of mid sentence and kissed her so hard Ginny was almost crushed

"We're going to have a baby!" Harry yelled at the top of his voice before bending down and kissed first the little bump then Ginny.