Disclaimer: there would be many more sordid love stories in Harry Potter if I wrote it. (I mean come on, what kind of teenage boy only goes out with two people in his entire life?)

It took me almost an hour to find Sirius. Eventually I went up to the Astronomy tower under James's invisibility cloak on a whim. There I found him, sprawled in a corner, his gaze on the stars above, the smoke from his cigarette curling into odd patterns above his head.

'Pads?' I said softly.

He looked up at me slowly. 'Hey Moony.'

'James was wondering where you were…'

'Really? 'Cause I'd've thought that if he really gave a shit he'd be the one looking for me,' Sirius said bitterly.

'What?'

He didn't answer immediately. 'I hate the stars.'

I was too used to talking with Sirius to mind the sudden change in conversation, so I went and sat down beside him. 'Can I have a fag?'

Sirius nodded and reached into his jacket for the box. Once I had a lit cigarette in my mouth, I asked,' why do you hate the stars?'

'They're so…hopeful. It's sickening.'

'What's wrong with hope?'

'It only sets you up for disappointment,' Sirius replied cynically.

I smiled humourlessly. 'But if you didn't have hope…what would you live for, really?'

He shrugged. '…cigarettes,' he said dryly.

'These'll kill you, you know.'

'Then they'll kill you too.'

'True enough…'

'Why aren't you stubbing it out immediately so?' Sirius demanded good-naturedly, though his eyes remained trained on the stars.

My turn to shrug. 'What with this war, I'll probably die long before the fags can get me.'

'Don't say that,' Sirius said with a genuinely horrified tone.

'Look who's gotten hopeful all of a sudden,' I smiled slightly.

'Cause telling you you're going to die of cancer is what passes for hope these days,' he smiled back.

'Of course…what's wrong?'

'What do you mean?' he asked blandly.

'You only ever come up here when there's something wrong.'

'James is in love with Evans,' Sirius said by way of an explanation.

'He has been since third year Pads,' I frowned. 'What's bothering you?'

'That's what's bothering me. He's in love with Evans and soon she'll say yes to him 'cause it's clear to everyone but herself that she's cracking and then they'll get married and have little junior Prongses and he'll never love anyone else.'

As soon as he'd gotten to the end of his almost-rant, he looked horrified that he'd said so much. We sat in silence for a while. It was an unusually awkward silence, Sirius and I were usually very comfortable in silence. But there was only one thing I could understand from what he'd just told me. He was in love with James. Neither of us said a thing for maybe five minutes. I concentrated on my cigarette, Sirius concentrated on the stars.

'That's another thing I hate about the stars; my family are named after them…'

AN: hope you liked it :D I actually had a different idea completely for this fic but this is what came out. I know you're a wonderful person so please review!