Dear Friend,
Today I realized that Sam and I can't keep this up forever. She's a college girl now, and I'm still in high school. I am sad to say that I believe that she will find another college boy. I don't know why I'm concerned, Sam and I were never dating, but I loved her. I was afraid that she would choose a boy who doesn't love her like I do. Sam hasn't ever realized how wonderful she is. I made her another mixed tape, but I have no clue when I'll get to see her again. Patrick and Sam stopped by during winter break. It's now May 4th. I miss them dearly, but I can't see them yet. The only problem is when I'm alone, it gets bad. I see things, and they haunt me. All I see in the mirror now are my imperfections and my scars. It's a collection that grows and grows. My mind wanders into unmarked territories. Now that my sister is out of the house, I don't see her much either. I've made various trips back to the hospital. When I go to the hospital, I have nightmares. Even my dreams of Sam have turned bitter. No one understands me. I don't understand myself.
Love always,
Charlie