Yadonoushi's struggle
- A Bakura/Ryo fanfiction
The card Ryo Bakura held in his hand was all creased and damp. It was hard to believe that when he received it a few minutes ago, A change of heart had looked brand new. Ryo's clenched fist and flowing tears had caused for this to happen in such a short amount of time. He had to buy a new card, one that looked spotless, or he wouldn't be able to face Yugi anytime soon.
"-and this card represents you, Bakura-kun." Yugi had sounded so friendly when he said it during lunch, but that couldn't ease the pain Ryo felt in his heart when he was handed the card. "Why this one?" He could hear the trembling of his own voice, the fear of what Yugi was about to say. Their friendship wasn't all that strong and with the parasite Ryo carried with him, even a small thing like handing out the wrong card could mean the end of the only friendship Ryo had ever experienced.
"Because Bakura-kun sometimes changes, right?" The calm way in which Yugi said those words freaked Ryo out. He was the only one who couldn't remember anything whenever the parasite took over, but everyone else knew. Why would they still be friends with him then?
"We like it when you're yourself, that Bakura-kun is our friend!" It was very nice to hear that, but it would have meant more if they had come from Yugi instead of Anzu. Ryo stood up as he tried his hardest to fight the welling up of his eyes by facing the floor. "Please excuse me, I need to use the restroom." He could feel everyone's eyes burning in his back, but he couldn't give in and look back, they'd see his puffy red eyes and the stream of tears.
"Come on Ryo, get it together." He was the only one who could hear himself speak, but yet Ryo whispered, scared that someone would enter the restroom. A change of heart was still held by his grip and the humidity of the card only increased. As Ryo looked at himself in the mirror, his heart filled itself with disgust. "I am not worthy of friends, I deserve to feel this lonely."
Suddenly, the Ring that contained the parasite started to jangle. The feeling of getting stabbed overtook Ryo's chest as he leaned on the sink, still staring at his reflection. "I deserve to feel this pain, I deserve every bit of it." Very gently, he lifted up his shirt and stared at the red colored bandage. It was hard to look at, but it was much better than looked at the Ring directly. Its five dangling prongs had forcefully pierced their selves in Ryo's flesh and the blood they caused to flow never seemed to stop. Even though it wasn't much blood, it would cause trouble if people were to notice it through his shirt.
Still, the pain or the blood weren't the worst about the parasite, Ryo had to admit he even got used to them. But the blacking out, the fact that he could never remember anything, those were the things that were getting to him the most. He wasn't himself anymore, he was no longer Ryo Bakura. He was just a vessel for an evil parasite that did nothing but harm others.
But even when he considered all those things, he still couldn't throw the Ring away. It felt as if the parasite was the only one who needed him, the only one who would be worse off if Ryo were to die. The feeling of being good for something was so liberating, there was no way he could give that up. "You're the only person who needs me,' he mumbled. "There is no one else who understand me like you do."
The Ring now jangled louder and a voice appeared in Ryo's head. "Look at you, you pathetic Yadonoushi. If you want to die that badly, why don't you commit suicide already?" Ryo stared in the mirror once again and his right eye shot wider as he did. He held the now almost torn up card in front of him, only to be shocked by the similarities. Ryo's reflection had split itself in half, with the right side showing his own face and the left one showing what had to be the parasite. The card disappeared in his pocket as he whispered with a sense of love and affection in his voice.
"You look just like me." Ryo had trouble uttering the words, but eventually managed. He put his hand against the cold glass and stroke the reflection of the face that belonged to his darker self. The parasite laughed. "Oi, don't compare yourself to me, we are nothing alike. The only reason I look like this is because it's your body." His voice was so harsh in comparison to Ryo's own voice and even though they looked alike, it felt as if they were complete opposites.
"I don't want to die." Ryo paused for a few seconds, wondering if he really meant those words. In those seconds, he convinced himself he did. "Well then stop your depressing complaining, it is annoying. You don't need those morons around you, you have me and that should be enough."
Should it? The white haired high school-er started to slowly remove the bandage after he had taken off his shirt. The pain increased as the layers lessened and Ryo had to wait a few times in order to catch a breath. The parasite was loudly protesting against his acts and even though Ryo was scared that he would take over, he proceeded with his plan.
"I am the one who will take control. This is my body and I will decide what I do with it. I won't kill myself over you or anyone. I will fight to be stronger and to be friends with Yugi-kun and the rest!" Ryo tried his hardest to suppress a scream as he harshly pulled out the Ring. When his hands slowly covered themselves with blood, he realized what he had done. He wouldn't be able to take over Ryo's body, the parasite. Now that the Ring didn't make direct contact with his skin, there was nothing he could do.
Ryo washed the Ring in the sink, put the bandage back on and looked in the mirror once again. This time, he was the only one staring back. No parasite, just him. "I win," he muttered, drying his eyes with a paper towel. "I get to choose when you appear, so deal with it." The only thing he could hear was dark laughter, which scared him because somehow it felt as if it was the last time he would hear it. "What are you blabbering about? I can do whatever I want, Yadonoushi!"
As soon as Ryo got a hold of himself, he noticed his reflection had changed once again. Now, he was no longer present, it only was his dark side looking back at him. After that, Ryo immediately felt lightheaded and his sight turned from the bright restroom at school to nothing but darkness.
The first thing Ryo noticed when he came to, was the bed he was lying in. It was a soft bed, with clean sheets and a curtain surrounding it. After adjusting to his new surroundings, he concluded this was the school's infirmary. The voice that was coming from the hall had to be Jonouichi's, only he would come to the infirmary making that much ruckus.
"Bakura-kun, are you alright?" Jonouichi had opened the curtain and looked at Ryo, his head red and his breathing heavy, probably from running here. "You look well enough, but what on earth happened? We were all worried sick when we heard you were brought here!"
For some time, Ryo didn't say anything. He didn't even greet Honda, Anzu and Yugi as they gathered in the infirmary with Jonouichi and himself. They had been worried about him this whole time, they considered him to be his friend. "We are glad you're alright, Bakura-kun." Yugi put his hand on Ryo's shoulder, looking him straight in the eye. "What happened?"
What had happened really? Even Ryo wasn't completely sure. The parasite had taken over his body, he knew that much. Did that mean his attempt to banish the dark one had failed? And as for that matter, did he really want to banish him? After all, he was the one who understood him best.
"Where is the Ring?" It was an odd question at a time like this, that's what must have gone through everyone's mind as Ryo said it. Nevertheless, Yugi handed it over and smiled while doing so. "You know, you've been sleeping for two days. They didn't want to move you because they were scared something would happen to you. We have been here every night to take care of you. Could you please tell us what happened? Bakura-kun, are you alright? You look pale."
Ryo hadn't listened to anything after Yugi had handed over the Ring. It was cold, it was as cold as a necklace should be. Normally the Ring was at least lukewarm, there was something really off. Had the parasite made a choice for him? Maybe he wanted him to discard the Ring so he could find another victim, a stronger victim. Whatever it was, it didn't matter, Ryo had friends, he had real friends of flesh and blood that liked him for who he was.
"Thank you all for your concern, but there wasn't much that happened. I just passed out." As he said it, everyone seemed to be satisfied with that answer for now, everyone but Yugi. Ryo sighed and looked for his pants and took out the card as soon as he found them. His final answer to Yugi's question was barely hearable as he unfolded the card, but it was loud enough for the people who claimed to be his friends to hear it and accept it. "A change of heart, that's what happened."
~The End