HEY =D this is my entry for Nikki-Fox's unlikely pairing contest. I dunno if this is A+ material…but it certainly is unlikely ;D R&R my lovers
~~Peace. Love. Flowers. Puppies. Nirvana~~
~~~Mick~~!
Disclaimer: I own the plot and the wonderful Jude Monroe. I got the title for this one-shot from the lyrics of Calling Dr. Love by Kiss
The First Step Of The Cure Is A Kiss
"I can't believe I got stuck with you conformist bitches" spat the Goth girl, distaste clear in her contact violet eyes. Yes, if there was one thing Henrietta Pilcher hated more than posers it would be conformists, the Britney's and Justin's that populated most of the world. And here she was, sitting against the wall—the disgusting sky blue wall—of Wendy Testaburger's bedroom, her leather bound book of dark poetry clutched to her chest.
"It's not like we chose our partners" snapped Wendy, tossing back her raven colored ponytail.
"Yah dude" spoke the other girl—Jude Monroe the goddamn hippie—in a spaced out voice. If there had ever been a trio who hated eachother more it goes unheard of. Henrietta hated Wendy—that stupid conformist, Britney, environmentalist cunt—and Jude too—the fucking hippie, always stoned out of her mind, poor as hell, reeking of marijuana and constantly sporting a tie dye tank top, did she ever wash it?
Wendy hated Henrietta—the overweight Goth bitch who thought she reigned high and mighty over all the Park County High students. And Jude---Wendy did agree with some of her thoughts, world peace and equal rights for everyone were good, but the brunette was always high, always getting kicked out of class for her stupid comments—which everyone found hilarious to Wendy's horror—and Jude Monroe, who was always under the influence was…kind of a slut.
Jude didn't like hating people; she was generally a peaceful, loving person. But when it came to Wendy Testaburger and Henrietta Pilcher—thing's were different. Jude had gotten a hate on for both girls on her first day at Park County High a few years back. You see, right smack in the morning on her first day of school Miss Jude Janis Monroe set her sights on the captain of the football team—Stanley Randall Marsh—who just happened to be Wendy's boyfriend. And the rest is history. That same day our favorite hippie first encountered the dreaded Goth queen, Henrietta. On attempting to start a conversation with one of the Goth boys-Red-Henrietta began screaming profanities at her—even going as far as to throw a half smoked cigarette onto the back of Jude's shirt—but Jude—ever the optimist—took the smoke with a grin and started idly puffing on it, continuing her conversation with Red. Henrietta's anger boiled over at that point and she doled Jude a hard kick to the back of her leg. Ever since then—well the two didn't see exactly eye to eye.
"Dude—what am I doing here?" Jude's dazed voice broke the chilly silence that had overtaken Wendy's girly room.
"Didn't we just explain that five minutes ago?" snapped Henrietta irritably, she whipped a pack of Camel cigarettes from the pocket of her leather jacket and brought one to her mouth. "Fuck" muttered the Goth, rummaging through her book bag. Jude pulled a bright yellow lighter from the pocket of her jeans—torn, wrecked blue jeans—they looked like rags. The brunette tossed the lighter to Henrietta. The Goth girl dared not thank Jude. She just lit up her smoke and threw the crappy lighter back to its owner.
"Ughh" Wendy's thick pink lips pulled up in a sneer, she flung the window open and waved the cigarette smoke out of her bedroom. "Smoking is fucking gross, Jesus Christ, it should be outlawed"
"Don't be hatin'" Murmured Jude Monroe—oh great noted Wendy—she just lit up a joint.
"Why're we here again?" Jude asked
"ARE YOU FUCKING STUPID" Wendy- the smartest girl in school-screeched, she was getting aggravated by the other girl's apparent lack of brain cells. "Mr. Fucking Garrison assigned us this stupid fucking project. We hafta think up a law that should be legalized in South Park—and the mayor actually agreed to choose one of the laws we come up with to be legalized"
"Not bad" Jude grinned her sickening Spicoli grin, her large brown eyes were bloodshot and surrounded by dark hollows. It looked as if her tank top—hand tie dyed—hadn't been washed in years and her red flannel shirt should've been a rag not something to be worn. "I think South Park should definitely legalize marijuana, that'd be excellent"
"I knew you'd say that" Wendy rolled her ocean blue eyes and turned to Henrietta who was sitting cross-legged, scrawling something into her notebook with a cigarette dangling from between her purple lips. "What do you think Henrietta?"
"Ughh" The Goth scoffed, she rearranged her upside down cross pendant so it hung against her full chest—her breasts were practically bursting out of her tight, strapless black dress. "I think a law that says all conformists shouldn't be considered people should be passed honey." Henrietta's voice was icy and bitter. "Let me guess, you have a better idea?"
"As a matter of fact I do" Wendy smiled saccharinely and placed one pale hand against her hip. "I think gay and lesbian marriages should be legal in South Park"
"Why would you care Britney, you're not a lesbian are you?" Henrietta's thick, chunky mascara coated eyelashes brushed down against her round paper white cheek. "You're not even bi" The Goth narrowed her eyes—the irises were something else, the thin plastic layer over the naturally blue optics was penetrating plum purple.
"I wouldn't go as far as to say that" Wendy exclaimed, her petite nose lifted skywards arrogantly.
"Dude you're bi?" Jude slurred from her current position--sprawled across Wendy's neatly made bed.
For a few moments Wendy looked unsure but then without missing a beat she replied; "Yes" The russet skinned hippie stood up—tottered momentarily—and then placed her surprisingly soft and warm hand to her rival's cheek. "What're you doing?" Wendy's voice was a few octaves higher than normal; a rosy blush covered her cheeks.
"You're bi" Jude smiled, raising an over plucked eyebrow. She parted her lips and let her hot breath tickle the black haired girl's face—her breath stunk of tobacco and marijuana and maybe even a hint of vodka. "Remember" Despite how stoned she was Jude Monroe could be quite seductive. Well she is a slut Wendy thought offhandedly. And before she knew what was happening a pair of full, dry red lips covered her own glossy ones. Jude Monroe was kissing her. Wendy's eyes shot wide open, she hooked her hands onto Jude's bony shoulders and tried prying the brunette off. Wasn't it Stan Jude liked, not her? Slowly Wendy relaxed, she even found herself—to her utter terror—returning the kiss. Jude's tongue gently pressed against the ravenette's lips and Wendy obeyed, opening her mouth, allowing the other girl's tongue entrance.
Suddenly as quick as it had happened it was all over because Henrietta Pilcher was pulling them apart. And before either girl could protest the Goth had pushed them both down onto Wendy's bed. Henrietta first kissed Wendy—the activist tasted cigarettes strongly and winced. And then Henrietta kissed Jude—Jude didn't mind the cigarette taste and eagerly parted her lips almost the instant the Goth kissed her. The three girls---the Activist, the Hippie and the Goth—continued on like this. Kissing eachother like there was no tomorrow, digging their fingernails—Jude's bitten and colored green, Henrietta's shiny and black and Wendy's bright pink—into each other's hair. Letting their hands roam over each others bodies with an unspoken passion.
"Would anyone like cookies" a sugary voice crooned from just outside Wendy's door.
"NO" all three yelled in sync. Wendy sat up from her bed; her long black hair was tangled, her lip-gloss had all been sucked and licked off-- her lips were now smudged purple and red from the other two girl's lipstick. Her white tank top was half pulled up, her green bra strap dangled down the smooth plain of her shoulder. "So…" she couldn't help but smile.
Henrietta was the second to sit up; her choppy ravenette hair was fucked she noticed with distaste, her black dress was pulled down to reveal her bra and her lipstick was everywhere. "So" she smirked, placing another cigarette against her mouth.
Jude Monroe was the last to sit up, her chest length brunette hair was by far the messiest, she didn't say anything—a hazy smile just graced her smudgy lips.
"So" Wendy repeated "Who thinks that gay/lesbian marriage is the law we should do our project on?"
Henrietta—ever the pessimistic bitch—couldn't help but provide an impish smile. "Sounds good" she purred. "Jude?"
Jude's lips pulled up in that massive Spicoli grin of hers—showing off crooked teeth. She gave the Goth girl a quick kiss—but this kiss was less passion and more—something else "That sounds…excellent"
Wendy bit down on her lip, her round blue eyes darted between the two and then she gave Jude a long, hard kiss. "I couldn't have said it better myself"