lost and found
Niha, this is for you, for Hogwarts secret santa but also for being such an amazing friend this past year. I hope your new year is filled with happiness and laughter. Xxx
happy holidays and a happy new year! Xx
so wow, it's been a while since I've written anything, especially jily. I promise I have a load of fics in progress, hoping to upload them in the next few weeks (fingers crossed!)
and, yes, before we get into the story, I made Narcissa bitchy (and Lily's age, thinking about it) because we needed a Regina George and I didn't want to make up an oc. so that's a thing now.
warnings for language, very light mentions of sex and not much else. a girl and a boy kiss, as do two girls, if that offends anyone. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
also I literally have no idea where that title came from, it appears to be something my sleep-deprived brain came up with and I just went with it because I actually quite like it.
without further ado (before I bore anyone to death with my incredibly long a/n)...
[Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter and accept no credit towards it. I am not J.K. Rowling nor am I in any way affiliated with her.]
In truth, Lily was not nervous about her school reunion.
She still kept in contact with a couple of her friends (Marlene and Dorcas - who coincidentally were now a couple themselves) and she was planning to meet them outside the venue anyway so she wasn't worried about having nobody to talk to this evening.
She was a little bit annoyed that bloody Narcissa Black (now Malfoy if Lily had heard the gossip correctly) had decided to schedule said reunion on Christmas Eve because there were slightly better things that Lily could think of doing the night before Christmas (if she was being honest, she had been going to wash her hair and watch The Polar Express for the fifty-seventh time but nobody else needed to know that) but never mind. This was her three year secondary school reunion and it would be good to see everyone.
Well, almost everyone.
.
Climbing from the taxi and paying the driver, Lily spotted the familiar bounce of Marlene's brown curls and rushed to catch up with her friend.
"Marley!"
"Lily!" Marlene echoed back, a teasing smile on her lips as she pulled her best friend in for a hug. "It's been ages!"
"Two whole days," Lily laughed, squeezing Marlene's shoulders as she drew back. "You've been practising."
"Does it sound convincing enough?" Marlene asked as she leant against the brick wall. "Oh, I've missed you too! We should see each other more!"
"Absolutely," Lily said, grinning. "But come on, Marley, you must be a little excited?"
"To see everyone or to catch up on gossip?" Marlene asked, pulling a pocket mirror out of her bag and checking her reflection. "Because the only reason I'm here tonight is to see if Emmy's been knocked up yet and if Frank's finally asked Alice to marry him."
"They went on holiday last week," Lily said, shrugging. "Maybe he popped the question then. Did you not check her Instagram?"
"Funnily enough, no." Marlene snapped her mirror shut. "I'm not a stalker like some people." She sent a meaningful glance Lily's way and then crushed her best friend in another hug. "Love you."
"I love you too," Lily said, patting Marlene's arm. "Enough though you're horrible to me."
"Am not!" Marlene said, aghast, and linked her arm through Lily's. "Come on, Lils. Let's go find Narcissa and I'll show you what me actually being horrible sounds like."
.
"Are you sure this is the right address?" Lily said, scanning over the envelope one final time.
The two girls looked up at the towering building.
"Yep. That's what it says. Trust Narcissa to send card invitations. Why couldn't she have just done it on Facebook like everyone else?"
"You don't have Facebook, Marley," Lily laughed.
"Exactly," Marlene replied. "Then I wouldn't have been invited and I wouldn't have to spend my Christmas Eve with that lot."
"You sound so disgusted. Cheer up a bit. Where's Dorcas meeting us?"
"Here, I guess." Marlene gestured to the pavement they were standing on. "She dropped by to see her sister first who I declined visiting on account of her sister's patronising and condescending remarks." Marlene sniffed. "Oh, Dory, I think it's so wonderful that people like you can finally express their feelings. Now, you two don't need to be shy, I have no qualms about you kissing in front of me."
"What a bitch," Lily said. "She sounds about as bad as Tuney."
"You had a card this year?" Marlene asked gently.
Lily shook her head and tried to act like it didn't bother her.
"Nope. I haven't spoken to her since her birthday in September."
"Fuck her," Marlene said with feeling and squeezed Lily's arm. "You don't need her."
"Lily! Marley!"
From across the street, Dorcas Meadowes was rushing toward them, her black hair flying into her face as she ran against the wind.
When she reached them, she threw her arms first around Lily and then around Marlene, who kissed her and then pulled back to admire what her girlfriend was wearing.
"Gorgeous," she said and Dorcas blushed. Without looking, Marlene added to Lily,
"Not bad yourself, Evans."
"Oh, she's lying," Dorcas reassured Lily as the two girls hugged again. "You look stunning, as per usual."
"Have you seen yourself?" Lily said, gesturing an envious hand to Dorcas' emerald green dress and extremely high heels. "You look-"
"Ladies," a familiar, warm voice said from behind them and Lily spun to see her ex teacher, Professor McGonagall walking towards them. "I hope I'm not interrupting?"
"Professor!" Lily called, her face lighting up. "What are you doing here?"
"What a wonderful welcome," Professor McGonagall said dryly, but the corners of her lips were twitching into a smile. "Miss Black sent me one of her invitations and I thought what better way to see what my former students have made of themselves since I last saw them." She reached the group of girls and looked them up and down again. "I see not much has changed, Miss McKinnon."
Marlene flushed red (something only Sirius Black and Professor McGonagall could make her do) and tugged at her short skirt.
"How are you all?" McGonagall looked around the group. "Am I talking to university girls?"
"Only Lily," Dorcas piped up, fussing with her hair to try and cover up her giant hoop earrings that McGonagall had so hated when she was their Head of House at school. "Marlene dropped out."
Marlene shot her girlfriend a glare and turned to her old teacher.
"I did try, Professor, but it just wasn't for me and-"
Professor McGonagall held up a hand for her stop.
"It's quite understandable," she said and then directed her tone at Lily. "So, Miss Evans, what are you studying?"
"English Lit and Media," Lily replied. "I want to be a journalist."
"And what about your acting dream?" McGonagall asked crisply and Lily had to fight the urge to gape; she didn't think her teacher would've remembered.
"I- I take performing arts classes on the side, Professor, but I don't think you'll be seeing me on TV anytime soon."
"Of course I won't, I don't have a TV," McGonagall said curtly. "Don't give up on your dreams, Miss Evans." She broke into a small smile. "It was good to see you three."
She swept past them, glided up the steps and disappeared through the large entrance doors.
"Whoa," said Dorcas. "Didn't think we'd be seeing her here."
"I always knew Lily was her favourite," Marlene grumbled. "Follow your dreams, Miss Evans. Don't be a slut, Miss McKinnon."
"Oh, don't be like that," Lily said, pulling on her friend's arms. "She made you dance captain in sixth year so you'd have something to put on your uni application. She likes you."
"Likes Potter more," Dorcas cackled and Lily forced a laugh before turning to glance up at the building.
"Well, are we going inside or what?"
"Here goes nothing," Marlene mumbled as the three of them clambered up the steps.
.
To say the lobby was grand would be an understatement.
"Wow," Dorcas said, glancing up at the glass ceiling and chandelier presiding over the entrance desk. "I didn't know this was in the budget."
"Well, everything's in the budget when you're a trophy wife to the world's most suspicious looking blond since Regina George," Marlene muttered. "I swear he dyes his hair-"
Lily elbowed her best friend rather hard in the ribs as the clacking of heels came down the corridor and Narcissa Malfoy emerged into the entrance hall.
"Hi Narcissa!" Dorcas said, a little too brightly and the blonde frowned slightly.
"Good evening, ladies."
There was a rather awkward silence which followed in which Lily, doing the only thing that sprung to mind, leapt
forward to examine Narcissa's ring.
"So we heard about the wedding! Congratulations! When did you say the vows?"
Narcissa, dripping diamonds and elegance, looked less than impressed to be having her hand pawed by Lily's fingers. Still, she regained a sort of regal eloquence as she spoke.
"November, as a matter of fact. It's Lucius' favourite month and we thought it the perfect time to celebrate our love for each other."
"Love." Marlene mouthed to Lily, making air quotations with her fingers.
"That's so nice," Lily agreed, touching Narcissa's heavily studded diamond ring. "And its a gorgeous ring, by the way."
"Thank you," Narcissa said, although her eyes said otherwise. "It was Lucius' grandmother's."
"Cheapskate," Marlene muttered to Dorcas. "He's got a million pounds hidden in that hair alone, I swear."
"Are those diamonds?" Lily asked loudly, trying to drown out her friend and her stupid mouth which didn't know the meaning of 'stop'. "I think they're diamonds, don't you, Dorcas?"
"Definitely." Dorcas nodded enthusiastically.
"Of course they're diamonds," Narcissa said, a little snappishly. "Lucius knows how to treat a lady."
"How much money does darling Lucius make again?" Marlene asked innocently and Lily resisted the urge to drop her face into her palms.
Narcissa fixed her steely gaze on Marlene, who gazed back unabashedly.
"I don't see why that is of your concern, McKinnon," she said, the same sickly sweet venom she was so prone to using back in school trickling into her voice. "Certainly enough to keep me in luxury whilst you slave away at the same waitressing job you've had since we were fifteen just to make ends meet."
If Marlene had been closer, Lily was sure that Narcissa would've woken up to a black eye.
Instead, the brunette moved a couple steps forward, a glint in her eyes; she was riled, and Lily shot a helpless look at Dorcas who shot her one back.
"I was just wondering," Marlene said. "Because there was a nasty little rumour going around a few years ago that you only dated the bloke because of his wealth and, in reality, he won't even hold your hand because he's too busy cuddling up to his mummy for a better allowance."
"You're one to talk about love," Narcissa snapped vindictively. "Gosh, everyone knows about the infamous Marlene McKinnon, breaker of boy's hearts, went through both of my wretched cousins as well as Emmy's brother before deciding that girls were more to her tastes and settling down with the fishmonger's daughter," she cast a disdainful glance over Dorcas. "Such a little slut."
"How dare you." Marlene hissed, her fists clenching.
She was shaking head to toe with anger and Lily, who was always about second chances, for once, was right behind her.
Seeing that if provoked much further, Marlene would end up starting World War 3, Lily gently pushed her friend out of the way.
"If you don't mind, Narcissa," the redhead said. "We're going to go and eat your food, paid for by your husband, and listen to your entertainment, financed by your husband, and be with our friends. We're going to enjoy our night. You're paying for it, after all."
She pushed past the blonde, not waiting for her friends to follow.
"I heard Potter's in there," Narcissa swung round, cruelty glinting in her eyes.
Lily turned, her voice soft when she spoke,
"Don't talk to me about James,"
And then she stormed off down the corridor.
.
"What happened to playing it cool tonight?" Dorcas said accusingly as the three of them hurried down the hallway. "That was, like, the complete and polar opposite of cool. That was cool's edgy and rebellious older brother, spite."
"She's a bitch," Marlene muttered and Lily nodded, albeit it a little slowly. She hadn't meant to let things get out of control back there, she'd been planning to handle to situation like an adult and with dignity and she was already feeling shame sliding down her back. "Cissa has no right to speak to us like that. We're not in secondary anymore. There's no more hierarchy. She can't say things like that just because we're not popular like she was."
"Marley," Dorcas intervened. "Remember we talked about that breathing thing."
"I am breathing!" Marlene snapped. "I am living and breathing for the day that, God forbid, her precious husband runs out of money and she has to learn how to live like the rest of us!"
"Whoa," Dorcas stopped her girlfriend in the corridor and placed her hand on her shoulders. "Calm down. You were doing so well in there."
"Until she called me a slut and disrespected your family and kept making snide comments whilst Lily was trying to be nice. I'm all for putting the past behind us and pretending to be nice but she clearly isn't and well, that's fine by me,"
"You didn't have to say anything in the first place, though, Marley," Lily said, leaning against the wall and looking over at her best friend, who was red in the face.
"Says you, Lily," Marlene replied, not entirely unkindly. "All up in Narcissa's face about her paying for our night - I'm almost impressed."
The corners of Lily's mouth twitched into a small smile.
"I'm not gonna let her insult us like that. Not anymore."
"Oh, you guys." Dorcas had an expression of extreme frustration on her face. "Honestly, why can't the Golden Rule apply to you two too?"
"Because rules are boring," Marlene answered and Dorcas looked very much as though she wanted to slap the wall.
"I'm starting to think you should've stayed with Sirius after all," she said, though her voice didn't sound too upset; more pitying and slightly amused. "You two would've been perfect together."
"Nah," Lily said warmly, moving over to put her arm round Dorcas' shoulder. "They would've been arrested after three months together, tops."
"Two, actually," Marlene said, a humorous glint in her eye as she joined the two girls in the middle of the hallway. "We probably would've tried to steal the Declaration of Independence or the Crown Jewels or something."
Dorcas laughed and Marlene threw her arms around her, whispering into her girlfriend's ear,
"Love you,"
"Love you too," Dorcas whispered back and she planted a kiss on her girlfriend's lips.
"I hate to interrupt," Lily said apologetically, "but shall we go face the music?" She gesture to the door at the end of the hall where various show tunes were belting from behind. "Literally?"
"Absolutely," Marlene said and the three of them nodded before striding off towards the door.
.
Lily didn't think she'd ever seen so many familiar faces crammed into one space before; everywhere she looked, she saw the smiles she remembered so fondly from her time at Hogwarts, heard the laughter she was so prone to hearing every break and lunch.
It was strange...it was like being back at school again, like being sixteen again, foolish and free and having the whole world at your feet.
People stood clumped in the same groups they'd stuck to in school, chattering loudly; some brave souls had ventured on to the dance floor and were currently swaying to the Top 40, Lily spotted Narcissa and Lucius among them.
"Lucinda Talkalot alert," Marlene whispered out of the corner of her mouth and quickly, the three girls immersed themselves in the streamers hanging from the wall as the ex Slytherin football captain waltzed past with a nice piece of eye candy on her arm, giggling and obviously very drunk.
"Fucking good thing we avoided her," Marlene muttered, peering as the blonde disappeared toward the ice sculptures (of which, Lily thought were a tad too much.)
"She always did have terrible taste in company."
"Ooh, I don't know, I thought he looked quite nice," Dorcas said and then blushed when Marlene swung her incredulous stare her way.
"Food, look," Lily said quickly and she ushered her friends off toward the trestle tables.
.
The food selection was just as vast as the ice sculptures were over the top.
Four banquet style tables, set with the same colours their houses had been at school, were set against the wall, laden with food and (Lily noted with noticeable pleasure) plenty of free booze.
"This is brilliant," Marlene said, satisfaction evident in her voice. "If we can't be at home drinking ourselves sick, we can be here drinking ourselves sick and then vomiting on Narcissa's overly expensive dress."
"Oh, damn you, McKinnon, I was just having the exact same idea."
The three girls turned to see a grinning Sirius Black standing behind them, champagne glass in hand and the tell-tell stains of lipstick already on his collar.
"...hi," Marlene said, seeming to not be comprehending that her ex boyfriend/fellow partner-in-crime was standing before her. "Hi!"
She threw her arms around him, grinning.
"Oh, it's been a long time, Black,"
"Not nearly long enough," he teased as he turned to Dorcas, hugging her as well.
He looked over at Lily (who had been trying very hard to look interested in the wall hanging behind her) and blinked. She offered a weak smile, red shame creeping up her neck.
"Hello, Evans," he said somewhat coolly, looking her up and down. "Nice dress."
"Hi, Sirius," she replied, slightly taken aback. "Um, how are you?"
"Not bad," he said. "No, not too bad."
"That's really great," she said, struggling to keep the smile on her face as she stared at Sirius.
"Oh, screw you and your heart, Evans," he said suddenly, pulling her into a tight hug. "I'm trying really hard to be mad at both of you and it's not working."
"You're not mad at me?" Lily breathed, the weight on her chest lifting a little.
"Well, not anymore," Sirius said. "The tosser, however, yeah, still a bit."
"It was mutual," Lily reminded him.
"Mutual my arse, Evans," Sirius replied. "Honestly."
Lily laughed, tears very embarrassingly springing to her eyes.
"God, I've missed being your friend," she said, squeezing her arms around his shoulder's tighter. "It hasn't really been three years, has it?"
"Well, you're the one who decided uni in Scotland would be a good idea," Sirius pointed out. "Much as I love you, Evans, you're going to have to let go because I think I might be loosing oxygen in my arms."
"Sorry," Lily said, pulling back. "Sorry."
"And there you go with your British charm again," Sirius said, rolling his eyes. "How are you? How's uni life?"
"Alright." Lily shrugged. "My roommates are great, actually, but the workload is pretty heavy."
"Boyfriend?" Sirius asked, folding his arms.
"Absolutely none of your business," Lily said, swatting at his arm.
"That's a no, then."
"...yes."
Sirius smirked.
"So, where's Remus and Peter, then?" Lily asked quickly before Sirius could say anything else. "Still alive?"
"Well, I haven't gotten them killed yet so that's a plus, although James did accidentally cut Pete's finger off last year, so-"
"He did what?" Lily yelped.
"We were mucking around in the kitchen and James was absolutely pissed and started trying to play darts with the kitchen knifes and, well, Pete's hand got in the way. It's alright, though," Sirius added hastily, seeing Lily's expression. "It was only his pinky finger and Pete now refers to himself as the second best Captain Hook so all's good."
He looked expectantly at the redhead.
"Bloody hell." Lily muttered and ran a hand through her hair. "You lot are dangerous."
"It's not as bad as the time Remus-"
"You know what, I actually don't think I want to hear it," Lily said. "I think it might make me loose my appetite."
"You're not wrong," said Sirius and leaned in closer so he could whisper. "Just whatever you do, do not ask Remus to show you his left foot."
Lily pulled a face and poked her friend.
"You're a menace," she said.
"And proud of it." Sirius added and grinned.
.
After about five minutes of whispering and giggling to each other, Marlene and Dorcas very suspiciously disappeared off to the toilet and Lily was left alone with Sirius, picking along at the various foods displayed; she hadn't eaten since lunch.
"God, I'm starving," she said as she picked up another breaded prawn and dipped it into the chilli sauce before biting into it and closing her eyes. "Ugh, this is fantastic. For all her faults, Narcissa certainly knows how to throw a party."
"I saw a hair floating in the fondue." Sirius said bitterly and Lily laughed, patting his shoulder.
"Don't be jealous. Yours were always better."
"Mine and James'." Sirius corrected and Lily stared for a moment before turning away.
"Yeah," she said, moving over to the mini cupcakes. "Of course."
"He's here tonight, you know," Sirius called from behind her. "You should see him."
Lily paused in the middle of selecting a cake.
"Chocolate or vanilla?" She asked, tilting both cupcakes (neither of which she really wanted) in the light. In a quieter voice, she added,
"I don't think that's such a good idea."
"Why not?"
Lily turned to see Sirius shoving his hands in his pockets and raising his eyebrows.
"Come on, Evans, he'll be really glad to see you-"
"Look, Sirius, it's been three years, I hardly think he's been pining away-"
"He cried himself to sleep for two weeks after you left," Sirius said quietly. "Lily, I love you but you broke his heart. You know that."
Lily put down the cupcake in her hand.
"I do," she said and bit her lip. "And I'm so, so sorry. But don't you think he broke mine as well?"
Sirius sighed and pinched his nose.
"You two should be on a fucking soap. Jesus."
"I'm gonna go to the bathroom, okay?" Lily said, tears blurring her eyes. "I'll be back in a minute."
"Evans-" Sirius started to say but Lily moved past him and into the crowd.
.
Pushing her way into the bathroom (which was thankfully empty of her two best friends screwing each other), Lily put her hands on the counter and took a long, hard look at herself in the mirror.
"Pull yourself together," she said sternly. "Honestly. You're a wreck." She pinched her cheeks, trying to add a little colour into them: she'd gone deathly pale. "Stop wanting after your ex - he's your ex for a reason." She delved into her purse and pulled out her lipstick, applying a second coat to her lips. "Go out there and be confident. You own this place-"
Her voice died away as the door swung open and Narcissa hurried in, pausing to survey Lily with ice cold eyes.
"Were you talking to yourself?"
"Oh, um, that." Lily felt her cheeks flush pink. "I was giving myself a pep talk."
Narcissa looked at her and joined Lily at the counter, pulling a mascara wand out of her bag.
"I didn't like you in school, you know," she said suddenly and Lily raised her eyebrows, in the middle of stashing her lipstick away.
"Yeah, I knew," she said, her temper getting the better of her." You made it pretty fucking clear."
"You sound as common as muck when you speak like that," Narcissa said, her eyes locking on Lily's in the mirror. "I suppose that's exactly what you are, though, so I can't really blame you."
There was a clang as her mascara dropped out of her fingers and clattered across the counter and Narcissa looked up to see Lily holding a shaking hand up to Narcissa's wrist.
"I may not be as zealous as Marlene when she gets into a fight but let me break this down for you: you were a bitch who made my life miserable at Hogwarts for the pecuniary circumstances my parents were in but you cuddled to the governor's much older son when we were at school and married him at twenty in order to gain financial security so don't you dare ever judge my monetary situation again. Is that clear?"
Lily stepped back, grabbing her purse off the counter.
"Did I use enough long words for you? I was under the impression that you couldn't understand anyone unless they'd swallowed an English dictionary and thrown back up all the words you didn't approve of. You don't like vulgar language? Fine. But that didn't stop you from calling my best friend a slut, did it?"
Shooting Narcissa a death glare that would rival that of Bellatrix, Lily spun on her heel and stormed from the bathroom.
.
Breathing heavily, Lily sidestepped into the throng of people before Narcissa could find her and knocked heavily into a small blonde who squealed, first out of alarm, and then when she saw who it was.
"Lily!"
All at once, Lily found herself being crushed by a puff of blonde hair and baby pink lipstick and she laughed as she hugged her old friend back, squeezing tight.
"God, it's good to see you, Alice."
Alice Fortescue, the only person their age Lily had met who was actually shorter than the redhead, smiled before kissing Lily on the cheek and pulling back.
"Your hair is so much longer than when I last saw you," she said, and Lily remembered her school days of high ponytails and French plaits.
"I like it this length actually," Alice continued, fiddling with a strand of Lily's hair which reached past her abdomen. "It suits you really well, you look like The Little Mermaid."
"Well, let me know if you find a seashell bra," Lily laughed and then squeezed her friend's hands. "How are you doing, Alice?"
In response, Alice wiggled her left hand and Lily saw a glittering ring sitting on her finger, tastefully studded with a diamond and a pearl.
"He didn't?" Lily gasped and suddenly the pair were reduced to two squealing teenagers again as Alice cried "He did, he did!" and started hugging her again.
"Goodness, I thought I heard Fortescue's falsetto tones over here."
Dorcas bustled over, accompanied by Marlene, both of them grinning like mad.
"Marley, collar." Lily hissed and Marlene looked down at her lopsided blouse.
"Oops," she giggled, confirming Lily's suspicions that something other than kissing had gone on in that bathroom, and started to fiddling with her top.
"Where'd you disappear to?" Dorcas
asked Lily. "Sirius said you ran off?"
"It was a dignified walk," Lily muttered and then raised her voice. "I went to the bathroom. Actually went to the bathroom," she added, shooting a sidelong glance at Marlene who stared back unabashedly. "Anyway, me and Narcissa has an altercation so I'm currently in hiding."
"What did she say to you?" Marlene said at once, her fists balling.
"Same old stuff they used to say at school," Lily sighed. "Don't worry about it, Marley."
"Fuck those old money families," Marlene snapped, her fists clenching tighter. "Sirius is the only good one, I swear."
"James too," Lily said softly before she realised exactly what it was she was saying. "I mean - he's not a prick like the rest."
"How is James?" Alice asked kindly, before Marlene could say anything else and Lily hesitated.
"Oh, um, well, I haven't seen him since school."
Alice's gentle expression turned accusing.
"What?"
"Well, after we broke up - I don't know, we just haven't spoken since..."
Alice folded her arms and Lily threw her hands in the air.
"What is the deal with you lot? We weren't the 'it' couple - we were the poor, theatre girl on a scholarship and the school jokester who cut his own friend's finger off whilst he was drunk, who kissed at a party and then screwed for two years until I left for uni! I didn't want a long distance relationship so we broke up. There's nothing special about that."
Dorcas and Marlene exchanged glances: not even they were brave enough to breach the 'James situation' (as it was referred to) but Alice's eyes narrowed.
"You were not the 'it' couple," she explained. "You were the couple who stayed up until four in the morning listening to music, the couple who cancelled their one year anniversary to stay with a friend who'd just lost his mum, the couple who kissed for four whole minutes after they both passed their GCSE's with flying colours, the couple who were just brimming with life and love and laughter and made everyone else brim with those things too. You loved each other. Don't deny it, Lily."
There was a moment of silence as Lily opened her mouth and then closed it again, gaping like a fish.
"How- you- I'm twenty one - I love you all but I don't need you to decide my relationships - why do you care?"
"I care," Alice said gently, touching Lily's arm. "Because you found someone who loved you and you let them go. Trust me, Lily, you didn't see the way he looked at you when you weren't looking, like you were the most special person on the planet, like no one else was worthy of his attention in that moment but you." Alice gave a small shrug. "I'm not saying you should get back with him but you should talk to each other. You kind of owe it to him."
Lily looked to her left but Marlene and Dorcas had suddenly become very interested in a fly which was buzzing around the lanterns and wouldn't meet her gaze. Lily turned back to Alice, who gave her a smile.
With a groan, Lily held up her hands.
"Alright. Just give me ten minutes to work up the nerve, okay?"
"Absolutely," Alice grinned and motioned to Marlene and Dorcas. "I'm gonna hug you now, okay?"
"Okay." Lily smiled and let Alice squeeze her before letting go and jumping about like an overexcited puppy.
Whilst Alice began chattering away non stop to Marlene and Dorcas, Lily reached for a champagne flute on a waiter's passing tray and downed it in one gulp.
The waiter looked at her strangely and Lily held up her hand as she reached for another one.
"Don't judge me, please. I'm gonna need a lot more to survive this evening."
And she started on her second glass.
.
"It's Regina George," a slightly drunk Marlene whispered seven minutes later as Lily gripped her third champagne glass tightly on her hand. She was starting to feel a little lightheaded if she was being honest but the alcohol was taking the edge off her nerves so she wasn't complaining.
"What?" Alice said, still chirpy and annoying sober, even on her second gin n tonic, bouncing on her toes.
"Lucius fucking Malfoy," Marlene hissed, pointing at the man who was striding around the room. "Spiteful, rich, and has suspiciously long hair." She turned to Lily. "Do you think he wears hair extensions?"
"I think you've got an obsession," Lily answered back, swirling the champagne in her glass and watching the bubbles bob around.
"Lies," Marlene said, swaying on her feet: she was what Dorcas called a dramatic drink. "I just think we have a right to know why Jareth the Goblin King is marching around with a smirk like he owns the place."
"He does own the place," Dorcas whispered, staring moodily at her lemonade: she was the designated driver.
"Stupid bloody smirk," Marlene mumbled and shuffled to the side so she could continue beadily eyeing Lucius through the crowd.
"Ten minutes," Alice sang, grabbing onto Lily's shoulder: she always got moe exited the more she drank. "Off you go!"
"-what?" Lily spluttered as her champagne glass was prised from her fingers and she was pushed gently in the direction of the bar.
"Time to go find James," Alice said and then eyed Lily reproachfully. "You promised."
"Oh- oh, fine," Lily sighed, staring forlornly at her champagne glass which was being set on the table by Alice. "I take it none of you are going to come with and ease the awkwardness?"
"I'll pass," Dorcas said apologetically, looking at Marlene, who was pointing her fingers to her eyes and then at Malfoy and mouthing "I'm onto you," with heavy conviction. "Someone needs to take care of this idiot."
"Bye, bye," Alice said cheerfully. "You need to do on your own. We'll stay right here and you may escape after ten minutes, okay?"
"See you," Lily said and set off toward the bar, thinking that that would probably be the best place to start looking for four twenty one year old men.
.
She spotted Sirius leaning against the bar, talking rapidly with much more confident looking Remus and a slightly plumper Peter. There seemed to be no James Potter in sight.
Battling her nerves, she walked in their direction and called out, "Sirius!" before she could loose the bottle and run back to the safety of her friends.
"Lily!" Sirius cried in delight, waving her over and handing her a glass of champagne he'd materialised from somewhere.
"Lily!" Peter echoed and Remus smiled warmly, raising his glass to her as she settled herself against the bar next to Sirius.
"Do you want to see Remus' left foot?"
Peter asked, breathing heavily and Lily had to shake her head firmly more than a few times for Peter to get the message.
"How are you, Lily?" Remus asked, turning to her as she sipped her drink.
"She's come to see James, haven't you?" Sirius said before Lily could reply, a knowing look on his face, slightly proud.
"Ah," Remus said, giving Sirius a look.
"Don't do that," Sirius said. "They'll be fine. They're not going to kill each other. It's not fifth year again."
Lily flushed, the corners of her mouth twitching into a smile.
"Pete, you tosser, you said they had crisps over there..."
A silence descended over the group as James Potter appeared from behind Remus, his voice trailing away as he locked eyes with Lily, his irises widening.
"Lily?" He said, confused and surprised at the same time. Lily's breath caught in her throat as she looked over him; he looked exactly the same as when she last saw him - the same messy black hair, and warm hazel eyes hidden behind wire-framed glasses (his eyesight was terrible) - but also different at the same time; his shoulders had broadened and his voice sounded deeper and Lily could only imagine the muscle hiding beneath his shirt.
She was the first to look away, flushing even redder as his eyes flitted with emotion: bewilderment, hurt, relief.
"What are you doing here?" He asked, just sounding confused, even though Lily knew he had the right to sound hurt and angry and shout and swear.
"I'm just in town for the holidays," she said, smiling and trying to stop herself from launching into his arms and never letting go. "I'd thought I'd come say hi to everyone."
"Well, hi," James said and then for a moment nobody said anything. His eyes wouldn't leave her face and Lily felt like any second she missed looking at him would be a second wasted so she didn't even spare a glance towards Sirius, Remus, and Peter, who were whispering furiously.
"I'm going to go to the bathroom," Sirius announced suddenly and Remus nodded vigorously.
"Yes. Me too. Not like that," he added hastily as an afterthought. "I just have to pee."
At this, Lily tore her stare from James to gaze pleadingly at Sirius and Remus but Remus merely shrugged apologetically and Sirius grinned and gave her a thumbs up.
"Well, we'll be off," he said and then seemed to notice Peter who was still standing stock still with his mouth open. "Won't we, Wormy?"
He nudged Peter.
"Oh, oh yeah." Peter said immediately. "I, um, I have to go...iron...my cat."
Remus dropped his face into his hands and moaned something unintelligible but before anyone could say anything else, Sirius hurried them away, shouting,
"Be back soon!"
"You'd better stay away from Crookshanks!" James yelled after Peter's retreating figure before turning back to Lily.
"Crookshanks is my-"
"Cat. Yes, I remember," Lily said, smiling at the memory. "You've had him since you were sixteen."
James sighed and ran a hand through his hair. Lily remembered him doing this at school, in an effort to seem more cool, but seeing him do it now, he just seemed tired.
"What are you doing here, Lily?" He said, leaning against the bar. "Really?"
"I- I wanted to see you," Lily said taken aback. "It's been a while..."
"Three years, Lils," James said and Lily couldn't deny that her heartbeat sped up a little when he called her that. "It's been three fucking years."
"I know," Lily said, swallowing the lump in her throat. "And I missed you."
"I missed me too, if we're being honest," James said, cracking a small smile and rivulets of relief washed over Lily's brain.
"How's uni?" He asked, adjusting his glasses. "How's your journalism going?"
"Good," Lily said, slightly surprised he'd remembered. "This is my last year actually so I don't really know what I'm going to do after I graduate."
"You'll be a fantastic journalist," James said in a quiet voice, offering her a smile which Lily returned.
"Thank you." and then, before she could get too emotional, she added, "how's life for you?"
"I got a football scholarship a few months after you - you left. So, that's cool, I guess."
"That's amazing," Lily said. "I had no idea."
"Well, you wouldn't," James said. "You unfollowed me on Instagram and deleted my phone number."
"James-"
"Look, Lily, it's okay. I get it. You didn't want to a long distance relationship. But that's the past. We have our whole lives ahead of us - and, and I want to know wether you want me to be a part of yours."
Lily stared at her ex for a moment, bewildered, hardly believing that James was asking her the very thing she'd wanted ever since she'd broken up with him.
"I still love you," she said softly, reaching out to touch his arm. "That hasn't changed."
"Neither has it for me," James replied and grasped her fingers in her hand.
And suddenly his lips were on hers and she was kissing him back, arms wrapping around each other as their drinks stood forgotten on the bar.
It felt fantastic, it felt like coming home and somewhere in the recesses of her mind, Lily wondered how she'd deprived herself of this for three whole years.
As they broke apart, James reached down and tucked a lock of hair behind her ear, his breath ticking her skin as he whispered,
"Do you want to go somewhere more private?"
.
Laughing and clutching hands, they half stumbled, half ran down the corridor, both tipsy of off alcohol and reunited love, whispering and muttering about everything at once.
"Here," James mumbled, burying his face in Lily's neck as he pushed open the door to a storeroom and they hurried inside. "It's quiet in here."
Not even pausing to lock the door, he pulled Lily on to his lap; she giggled (very uncharacteristically for her) and wrapped her arms around his neck.
"I've missed this," she whispered and crashed her lips onto his again, allowing James' hands to slip lower than perhaps they should.
"Go out with me?" He asked in between kisses, entwining his fingers with hers in the dim light.
"I really should say no," she whispered, leaning against his shoulder and listening to his heartbeat. "But you smiled at me and somewhere along the way I think I fucking lost it so okay."
Fin. I apologise for any awkward sounding sentences (though hopefully there aren't any!); it is very late here and I plan to read through this tomorrow once I am not so sleep deprived.
Reviews (especially nice ones!) would make my day.
As always, thank you so much to everyone and anyone for reading! Have a happy, healthy, and safe new year, everyone! Xx