A/N: Disclaimer: Saiyuki isn't mine. I shall go cry now.
Hello and welcome to an interesting little fic I thought up after having a case of the hiccups for nearly an hour. It was fun, believe me. So I thought I'd share the joy! This will actually be an ongoing fic, with a bunch of different scenes of, well, humanity from the Sanzo-ikkou. They, too, make mistakes. They, too, have fully-functioning systems. And that makes for some funny stuff sometimes. So enjoy this first chapter and hang on for a few more. I have ideas. Wahaha.
Warnings: Language, and that's really it. At least for now. Enjoy!
...
It was, as to be expected, another sunny, dry day. Sunny, dry, and hot. Gojyo was already coated with a fine sheen of sweat from the morning heat when he was amiably awakened by his roommate. He swatted irritably at the cause of his discomfort, and sat up when he realized both monk and hated harisen were gone. He grumbled a bit about the correct use of fans and how he was sick of undue bruises, not like he'd chosen to spend the night in the same room as a socially-inept flit with an anger management problem, thankyouverymuch. He grunted and got up, blinking against bright sunlight, shoved his feet into his boots, and sauntered out of the room in search of a little food.
Hakkai and Goku met him downstairs, already partway into their morning meal. A stack of empty plates at Goku's elbow was steadily rising, while Hakkai sipped hot tea and looked on with a mild smile. Gojyo plopped down next to Hakkai, staring across at Goku. He touched the elbow of a passing waitress and murmured, "Whatever he had."
"Sleep well?" Hakkai asked, looking pleasantly over at Gojyo. The redhead shrugged.
"Just fantastic." He yawned. "I had the friendliest roommate I could have ever asked for. And you?"
Hakkai gave a lazy half-cock of the head toward Goku. "I can get used to the snoring. Sanzo ought to be here in a few moments."
"He left before I did." Gojyo grinned as the first platefuls of food came, winking in thanks at the waitress. She nodded gently, strolling away with an extra skip every few steps. Gojyo began to eat, nodding in appreciation of the flavor of his food. "Not bad, not bad." He glanced up and grinned at the brunette at his side. "Not as good as yours, but I'll live, right?" Hakkai smiled and relaxed back into his chair, waiting for Sanzo to break the comfortable chaos of the morning.
Goku jumped. "Uh, guys?"
Hakkai raised an eyebrow. "Yes, Goku? Is something wrong?" In response, a loud hiccup burst from Goku's mouth, along with a surprised and vaguely sheepish look from the golden-eyed boy.
Gojyo laughed at the face Goku made. "Never had the hiccups before, saru?"
"Not a -hic!- saru! What's hiccups? They're weird!"
Hakkai put his chin on his hand. "Well, Goku, they're involuntary..." He stopped, noting the glazed look the first polysyllabic word had left on Goku and tried to rephrase his statement. "Er, hiccups happen when you eat food too fast and swallow too much air. We can make them go away, though."
Gojyo glanced over at Hakkai. "I guess that's what you get for shoveling food down so fast! Oi, Hakkai, let me try something?"
Hakkai had a bit of distrust in his eyes, but replied, "I'm sure you know more hiccup cures than I do, Gojyo." The redhead quirked an eyebrow at that seemingly innocent statement, but didn't play into Hakkai's wit for the moment. He'd have to investigate the suggested implications of it later.
"Okay, saru, it's common knowledge to get rid of the hiccups you gotta kiss a holy person." He nodded knowingly as Goku's eyebrows shot up toward his hairline. Gojyo took a sip of his coffee and added, "Lucky for you we have Sanzo around, huh?"
Goku's hiccups crowded together in a desperate race out of his body. The boy shook with them, as well as apparent nerves at Gojyo's brash statement. Hakkai glared at the man next to him, not needing to land any blows to make a point. "What?" the redhead cried. "Scaring people normally works!"
"Why, pray, are you scaring people?" a soft baritone asked, the words running like icewater down Gojyo's back. As predicted, Goku's big, bright eyes settled on Sanzo and his hiccups got even worse.
"Gojyo -hic!- says I gotta -hic!- kiss you! San-hic!-anzo, you'll -hic!- cure my hic-hic!-cups, right?"
For that one, both Goku and Gojyo felt the wrath of the harisen. And, unfortunately, the use of a fan did nothing to mitigate the effects of the day's heat. Goku rubbed his head, hurt in his eyes. "Ow! That wasn't even my fault! ...Hey! They're gone!"
Hakkai smiled, taking another sip of tea. "Well, what do you know. We have a foolproof cure for the hiccups."
Gojyo, still reeling from the blow, sent a death glare up at Sanzo. Slowly and deliberately, he picked up his chopsticks and went to pick up a piece of sausage. Before doing so, however, he turned to Sanzo and growled, "Fuck -hic!- you."
Hello and welcome to an interesting little fic I thought up after having a case of the hiccups for nearly an hour. It was fun, believe me. So I thought I'd share the joy! This will actually be an ongoing fic, with a bunch of different scenes of, well, humanity from the Sanzo-ikkou. They, too, make mistakes. They, too, have fully-functioning systems. And that makes for some funny stuff sometimes. So enjoy this first chapter and hang on for a few more. I have ideas. Wahaha.
Warnings: Language, and that's really it. At least for now. Enjoy!
...
It was, as to be expected, another sunny, dry day. Sunny, dry, and hot. Gojyo was already coated with a fine sheen of sweat from the morning heat when he was amiably awakened by his roommate. He swatted irritably at the cause of his discomfort, and sat up when he realized both monk and hated harisen were gone. He grumbled a bit about the correct use of fans and how he was sick of undue bruises, not like he'd chosen to spend the night in the same room as a socially-inept flit with an anger management problem, thankyouverymuch. He grunted and got up, blinking against bright sunlight, shoved his feet into his boots, and sauntered out of the room in search of a little food.
Hakkai and Goku met him downstairs, already partway into their morning meal. A stack of empty plates at Goku's elbow was steadily rising, while Hakkai sipped hot tea and looked on with a mild smile. Gojyo plopped down next to Hakkai, staring across at Goku. He touched the elbow of a passing waitress and murmured, "Whatever he had."
"Sleep well?" Hakkai asked, looking pleasantly over at Gojyo. The redhead shrugged.
"Just fantastic." He yawned. "I had the friendliest roommate I could have ever asked for. And you?"
Hakkai gave a lazy half-cock of the head toward Goku. "I can get used to the snoring. Sanzo ought to be here in a few moments."
"He left before I did." Gojyo grinned as the first platefuls of food came, winking in thanks at the waitress. She nodded gently, strolling away with an extra skip every few steps. Gojyo began to eat, nodding in appreciation of the flavor of his food. "Not bad, not bad." He glanced up and grinned at the brunette at his side. "Not as good as yours, but I'll live, right?" Hakkai smiled and relaxed back into his chair, waiting for Sanzo to break the comfortable chaos of the morning.
Goku jumped. "Uh, guys?"
Hakkai raised an eyebrow. "Yes, Goku? Is something wrong?" In response, a loud hiccup burst from Goku's mouth, along with a surprised and vaguely sheepish look from the golden-eyed boy.
Gojyo laughed at the face Goku made. "Never had the hiccups before, saru?"
"Not a -hic!- saru! What's hiccups? They're weird!"
Hakkai put his chin on his hand. "Well, Goku, they're involuntary..." He stopped, noting the glazed look the first polysyllabic word had left on Goku and tried to rephrase his statement. "Er, hiccups happen when you eat food too fast and swallow too much air. We can make them go away, though."
Gojyo glanced over at Hakkai. "I guess that's what you get for shoveling food down so fast! Oi, Hakkai, let me try something?"
Hakkai had a bit of distrust in his eyes, but replied, "I'm sure you know more hiccup cures than I do, Gojyo." The redhead quirked an eyebrow at that seemingly innocent statement, but didn't play into Hakkai's wit for the moment. He'd have to investigate the suggested implications of it later.
"Okay, saru, it's common knowledge to get rid of the hiccups you gotta kiss a holy person." He nodded knowingly as Goku's eyebrows shot up toward his hairline. Gojyo took a sip of his coffee and added, "Lucky for you we have Sanzo around, huh?"
Goku's hiccups crowded together in a desperate race out of his body. The boy shook with them, as well as apparent nerves at Gojyo's brash statement. Hakkai glared at the man next to him, not needing to land any blows to make a point. "What?" the redhead cried. "Scaring people normally works!"
"Why, pray, are you scaring people?" a soft baritone asked, the words running like icewater down Gojyo's back. As predicted, Goku's big, bright eyes settled on Sanzo and his hiccups got even worse.
"Gojyo -hic!- says I gotta -hic!- kiss you! San-hic!-anzo, you'll -hic!- cure my hic-hic!-cups, right?"
For that one, both Goku and Gojyo felt the wrath of the harisen. And, unfortunately, the use of a fan did nothing to mitigate the effects of the day's heat. Goku rubbed his head, hurt in his eyes. "Ow! That wasn't even my fault! ...Hey! They're gone!"
Hakkai smiled, taking another sip of tea. "Well, what do you know. We have a foolproof cure for the hiccups."
Gojyo, still reeling from the blow, sent a death glare up at Sanzo. Slowly and deliberately, he picked up his chopsticks and went to pick up a piece of sausage. Before doing so, however, he turned to Sanzo and growled, "Fuck -hic!- you."