Hey, everyone! My name's TheRealEvanSG, though for future references, you can just call me Evan. This here's a new fanfiction I made (obviously), and it's my first fanfiction about Gravity Falls, so I hope you all enjoy! It's gonna be a lot different from most, I can tell you that much. Okay! Leo, care to do the honors?
Leo: Sure thing, Ev!
Don't call me that. -_-
Leo: TheRealEvanSG does not own Gravity Falls, it's characters, or any environments naturally in the series. Gravity Falls and everything associated with it is owned by Alex Hirsch and Disney. TheRealEvanSG did not copy me from Rick Riordan's character Leo Valdez - - my name and powers were based on the name and element of the Zodiac Sign "Leo." My personality also somewhat resembles Leos. Libra is similar.
Chapter 1 start!
Chapter 1: Tourist Trapped
Ah, summer break - - a time for leisure, recreation, and takin' her easy. The short months of the year when kids can relax and let all the pressure from the previous school year off their backs.
...Unless you're me.
"AAAAAHHHH!"
Mabel, Dipper, Libra, and I careened down the dirt path, screaming our lungs off as Dipper desperately twisted the golf cart's wheel to avoid an unfortunate squirrel. The Pines Twins and I were scared out of their minds, but my own twin sister (yep, Libra) looked like she was having fun.
Why Dipper was driving when he was twelve and Libra and I were both fifteen was a good question.
It was late evening, and the Sun was sinking over the edge of the treetops, throwing a sailor red blanket over the sky. Crows, disturbed by my younger friend's reckless driving, spread their wings and took flight, reprimanding us with caws. The evening was cool, and the strong wind created by the cart's speed made it even cooler. I was gripping the side of the cart's bed so tightly my knuckles were turning white. Next to me, my blonde sister was just on her knees, her long hair flying back in the wind, grinning as wide as if someone had shouted "Free pizza!"
As if everything was against me today, I noticed something up ahead that made my eyes widen: Dipper was barreling straight towards a part of the path that had been uprooted, making it like a ramp. The brown-haired kid was driving too fast to avoid it. We all yelled even louder, though Libra whooped.
For a moment, it felt like we were weightless. My stomach was a stone falling in a well. Then the golf cart hit the ground on all four wheels, and Dipper spun the steering wheel desperately to regain control, causing us to swerve wildly. I almost toppled over the side.
Behind us, trees toppled under giant footsteps. Mabel twisted around in the passenger seat.
"It's getting closer!" she yelled over the wind, her star earring dangling.
I winced. "Mabel, your braces are reflecting the Sun directly in my eyes!"
"Oh! Sorry!"
"Dipper! Step on it!"
"I thought you said I was going too fast!"
I facepalmed. "WELL, YEAH, BUT I DON'T WANT TO GET EATEN BY THAT - - THAT - - I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT TO CALL IT!"
There was the sound of a very large creature that shouldn't exist snarling, like a dog gurgling into a fan. The ground shook with every step of its huge feet. A shadow fell over the golf cart. I turned around only to see two very large hands swipe at us. Thankfully, Dipper depressed the pedal at just the right time, and the monster failed to grasp us. We swerved around a boulder and continued down the path. I turned back around to make sure our kid driver wasn't about to run into anything. Mabel had a hand over her mouth.
My name's Leo Johnson. The blonde sitting next to me looking like she's in paradise is my twin sister, Libra, though everyone calls her Libby. Our parents named us after the Zodiac Signs of the days they were born. The kid driving's my best friend, Dipper Pines. The girl in the purple shirt, wearing too much glitter, and about to puke is Mabel Pines, Dipper's twin and Libby's best friend.
You may be wondering what the four of us are doing in a golf cart, fleeing a creature of unimaginable horror that can't be hurt even by the hottest of fires.
As if someone had given a cue, we turned around to see a tree hurtling at us.
"Look out!" Mabel shouted.
I gritted my teeth, dug into my pocket, pulled out a box of matches, and lit one. I then glared at it, and it flared to life, leaping to the offending tree and burning it to ashes in a matter of seconds.
Dipper grinned. "That'll never get old."
Oh, yeah. You may also be wondering how I can control fire.
Rest assured. There is a perfectly logical explanation.
Let's rewind. It all began when Dipper and Mabel's parents decided they could use some fresh air. They were to be shipped up north to a sleepy town called Gravity Falls, Oregon, to stay at their Great-Uncle's place in the woods. Gravity Falls also happens to be the place Libby and I were born. Unfortunately, our parents moved from the town just a few weeks after we were born, and we had never gotten a chance to see the place since. So, when we relayed the news to our own parents, they called up the Pines and struck an agreement to take us with Dipper and Mabel. The Pines Twins got the attic to sleep in, while we got the guest room.
TWO WEEKS AGO
The guest room of our new summer home was about twice as large as your average room: big enough to host two somewhat broken beds - - each with forest green sheets, a blue blanket, and a not-so-fluffy pillow - - and still have enough room for personal space for two people. There was a raggedy maroon carpet in between the beds, and a dusty window which filtered yellow light. A closet big enough for two peoples' wardrobes occupied the north wall, looking like it hadn't been cleaned in years. My nose wrinkled. I could feel my dust allergies waging war already.
"This guest room is great!" Libby exclaimed, looking under the bed. "Look! I found a dust bunny!"
I blinked and backed up as far as I could. "No! Get it away from me!"
The blonde girl giggled, her ponytail bouncing with her happiness. "You're weird! Dust can't make you sneeze just by looking at it!" she said.
"You're underestimating the power," I said seriously, refusing to look.
Libby was pretty normal for a fifteen-year-old girl. Like I've said before, she's blonde, and she wears her long hair in a ponytail to keep it from falling in her face. She has a prominent nose and a heart-shaped face. She likes wearing pink shirts, pink hats, and blue jeans.
There are two things that set her apart from normal girls, though. For one, her happiness and optimism knows no bounds and is only rivaled by Mabel's, which is probably why they're best friends. Her extremely cheerful and outgoing attitude means that she can make friends much more easily than I can. The second, and most important reason, is that she can control air.
Well, okay. She can't really control the air. Libby can only bend it when there's a breeze.
Like her, I'm not normal. People I say I look cool - - I wear my average brown hair in an afro, and afros give you ultimate power. Other than that, I'm tan from helping my dad in his garden, I have green eyes, and I don't really have muscles. At all. I'm usually wearing a shirt of some random musical group that I like (anything from The Black Eyed Peas to Train to Eminem). That day, I was wearing a navy blue shirt featuring the title of one of Train's singles, "Angel in Blue Jeans," along with black shorts and blue sandals. Lamely, I have really bad allergies to dust.
I get pretty good grades. I managed to snag a 3.8 GPA for my freshman year. But the thing that makes me stand out is, like Libby, I can control one of the elements. Unlike her, my element is fire. Like her, I can only control fire already existing; I can't make it, though I can increase the amount and heat of existing fire.
We're the only ones who know we can control fire and wind, besides the Pines Twins. Not even our own parents know. The only reason Dipper and Mabel do is because they accidentally saw us practicing controlling them behind the school one Saturday night. That was also the first day we met them.
"Here, touch Mr. Dusty!" Libby told me, suddenly in my face, waving her hand (and consequently, the dust bunny) in my face.
I gulped and backed away. "No! Get it away from me! Bad Mr. Dusty! Everybody hates Mr. Dusty!"
She chased me around the room a few times, and finally I escaped the torture chamber of dust, running out side with Libby and Mr. Dusty hot on my heels, giggling all the way. We dashed through the house a bit, and ended up outside.
The Pines Twins were already out. Mabel was rolling around in the yellow grass, saying, "Yay! Grass!" while Dipper was curled up against a tree and reading a book. The songs of birds rose up from the woods around the house. Mosquitoes buzzed annoyingly in my ear. I wished I'd brought bug spray.
Libby went off to roll in the grass like an idiot with Mabel. I sat down next to Dipper, who had been having a hard time adjusting to our new surroundings.
"Whatcha reading?" I asked.
He looked up from his book. "Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows. Once I finish this, I'm planning on starting the Percy Jackson series."
I nodded sagely. "Ah, Harry Potter and Percy Jackson. Both great series. I think I like Percy Jackson better, though. It's really too bad they totally screwed the movie over."
"Don't spoil anything."
Dipper and I were both avid readers. Go ahead, call us nerds, but books are fun!
A growl next to my shoulder made both of us jump in fright and whirl around. The Harry Potter book was thrown unceremoniously into a pile of leaves. We glared at the perpetrator - - a greedy old man in a black suit and tie, wearing a monster hat, who also happened to be Grunkle Stan, Dipper and Mabel's Great-Uncle. He held a walking stick topped with a Magic 8 ball and somehow made a magenta fedora actually look good.
He slapped his knee and burst into laughter so hard, he had to cough painfully. Grunkle Stan pounded his chest. "Hahahaha - - haha - - grk! - - hahaha - - hck! - - ha... ow. It was worth it!"
Their uncle had transformed his house into a tourist trap called "The Mystery Shack." He filled it with stupid attractions that mocked unknown creatures (i.e. The Sascrotch), and stuff like that. The real mystery was why anyone came.
And guess who had to work there?
It looked like it was going to be the same, boring routine all summer... until one fateful day.
ABOUT A WEEK AGO
It was a Monday - - which meant that the Mystery Shack was open for business. I was dusting, which I was sure was going to make me sneeze a storm. Libby was helping Wendy, a ginger our age whom Grunkle Stan had employed, at the cash register. Dipper was dusting a jar of fake eyeballs.
As I swept the broom across the wooden floorboards, grumbling under my breath, I noticed a boy holding a piece of paper, his eyebrow raised. Mabel appeared out of nowhere beside me, looking through a shelf of merchandise at the unknown boy.
"He's looking at it!" she whispered, grinning widely so her teal braces were showing. "He's looking at it!"
"'Do you like me?'" the boy read, frowning. "'Yes... Definitely... Absolutely...?'"
He looked around in confusion.
Mabel grinned slyly at me. "I rigged it."
She wore a pink sweater with a cat stitched onto it, jeans, and had a red headband across her brown hair. Her brother Dipper wore a plain red shirt, a dark blue vest, gray shorts, and a faded green hat with a star on it.
"Mabel," Dipper said carefully, "I know you're going through your whole boy crazy phase, but I think you're overdoing it on the crazy part."
I nodded seriously. "Believe me - - Libby went through one of those a year ago and it was torture. I ended up having to burn some moron's backside after he tried to get her to take some drinks."
He grinned. "Ha! I remember that! He was scared so badly he didn't even remember it!"
Mabel rolled her eyes. "Overdoing it? Whaaat? Pfft." She went away from the shelf and walked to us two boys, clasping her hands together dramatically. "Dipper, Leo, this is our first summer away from home! This could be my big chance to have an epic summer romance!"
"Yeah, but do you need to flirt with every guy you meet?"
"Like the tourist kid you accidentally shoved into the greeting cards, the guy with the pet turtle, the guy trying to get people to come to the Mattress Prince's sales event at the mall..." I listed.
She waggled her finger and smiled. "Mock all you want, brother and friend, but I have a good feeling about this summer! I wouldn't be surprised if the man of my dreams walked through that door" - - Mabel pointed her thumb at The Mystery Shack's entrance - - "right now!"
As if on cue, Grunkle Stan stepped in, gray beard and all, carrying a handful of large wooden arrows and a can of soda. He gripped his beer belly, winced, and burped. "Ow!" he gasped. "Urp! Ow! Aw, not good!"
Mabel shuddered while Dipper and I snorted with laughter.
Grunkle Stan finally stopped burping and looked at us. "Alright, look alive, people. I need someone to nail these signs to the trees in the spooky part of the forest."
"Not it!" said Dipper.
I shook my head quickly. "Not it!"
"Not it!" Mabel agreed.
"Not it!" Libby called from the cash register.
Soos, our resident repairman who was slightly overweight, was attempting to fix a loose screw on a particularly high shelf nearby. He wore a green shirt with a question mark on it. Despite being the repairman, he was actually really cool, and he'd often try out fun guy stuff with Dipper and I - - like seeing how long marshmallows can last in the microwave before they explode, or having water balloons fights and adding food coloring to the water. "Also not it," he said.
"Nobody asked you, Soos," deadpanned Grunkle Stan.
He nodded and took a bite of a chocolate bar. "I know. And I'm comfortable with that."
The Shack's owner looked at Libby and Wendy. "Wendy! I need you to put up these signs!"
Wendy Corduroy, the fifteen-year-old ginger girl who worked the cash register, was reading a magazine with her feet on the counter. "I would," she began, "but I can't... quite... reach it..."
Stan frowned. "I would fire all of you if I could. Alright, let's make it..." He looked at Dipper, Mabel, and I, and started pointing at each of us. "Eenie meenie miney..." His finger landed on Dipper. "You."
"Aw, what?" my younger friend complained. "Grunkle Stan, whenever I'm in those woods, I feel like I'm being watched."
He rolled his eyes. "Ugh, this again."
"I'm telling you, something weird is going on in this town! Just today my mosquito bites spelled out, BEWARE!"
Dipper raised his arm and Grunkle Stan squinted to read the bites.
He raised his eyebrow, blinking. "That says BEWARB."
"BEWARB?" I repeated, snorting. "What the heck does that mean?"
Dipper let his arm fall and nervously scratched his mosquito bites.
"Look, kid," said Stan, "the whole 'monsters in the forest' thing is just local legend, hyped up by guys like me to sell crap to guys like that." He pointed to a random tourist, who was chuckling at a bobble head of Grunkle Stan. "So quit bein' so paranoid. ...Tell ya what. Leo, go with him."
I shrugged. "Okay."
He handed us the signs, while Dipper sighed in annoyance.
"I don't need supervision..."
The two of us boys exited The Mystery Shack and headed for the part of the path that was in the spookier woods. Dipper and I had ventured there a few times in the past week or so, and he was right - - each time we went, we got this eerie feeling that someone was following us. Plus, the Gravity Falls citizens were... ah, colorful. There was a mysterious air around the environment, and it was starting to give me the creeps, too.
All in all, Gravity Falls and its surroundings were pretty strange.
Trying to ignore the hair-raising feeling of being watched, Dipper and I started hanging up signs. The sky was cloudy and spooky. A gale of wind swept by, shaking the treetops. A mysterious mist filtered through the trees like a thin, white blanket that could defy gravity.
Dipper grumbled as he pounded nails into tree trunks. "Stupid Grunkle Stan..." he complained. "Nobody ever believes anything I say!"
"I believe you," I said with a frown. "I get the same spooky feeling. Like these woods are cursed or something."
He snorted. "Pfft. Yeah, right. Curses are only in books and movies and stuff."
"I have the ability to control fire." I hung up a sign on one of the nails Dipper just pounded in. It read, No refunds!
The kid smiled weakly at me. "Thanks, Leo." He placed a nail against a tree, raised his hammer, and struck it against the nail's head. Instead of sinking into the wood, it stayed where it was and a metallic CLANG rang into the forest.
I blinked. "What the heck?"
Dipper raised an eyebrow and tapped his hammer against the spot. Two more CLANGS resounded. I hung up another sign and hurried to his side, curious. What kind of tree makes a metallic clang when you hit it? Dipper brushed his hand along its trunk, then stopped.
"Found something?" I asked.
He nodded. "Yeah. It's cold like metal and... I'm touching a groove."
"A groove?"
Dipper's fingers bent and pulled outwards. To our surprise, a square door about three feet wide opened, revealing a hollowed out section of the trunk. A strange radio-like device with two joysticks and an antenna sticking out of the top was inside. Cobwebs infested the compartment. I shuddered at the thought of all the dust that could possibly be in there.
I backed away several feet. "Okay, keep that away from me - - you know I have dust allergies!"
"You should take your allergy pill more often," Dipper told me with a deadpan expression. I chuckled nervously as he rolled his eyes and turned back to the radio thing. "Anyway, what is this thing? It looks like a radio, but it's really old..." He played with the joysticks a little. After a few seconds of this, I felt the ground beneath my feet start to slide backwards.
"Whoa, what the - -!?"
The ground stopped moving and I was thrown off balance into a log, falling flat on my back and groaning in pain. "Ow!" I complained. "Okay, that hurt."
Dipper turned around in surprise. "Leo! Hey man, you okay?"
I rubbed the back of my head and sat up. "Yeah, but my head hurts like..." I started to say, but when I saw the new squarish hole in the ground at my feet, I trailed off in shock. "...Um, okay, what? This is just too weird. I was just standing there, and now there's a hole..."
"Whoa," Dipper said.
We both peered into the hole. It was dusty and filled with cobwebs, like the secret compartment in the tree, making my nose twitch. I was about to pull away, but I noticed something at the bottom of the small hole: A dust-covered book. Two centipedes scuttled off of it.
I groaned. "Ew!"
"You sound like a girl."
"Shut up, Dipper, and just get the book already. I'm curious, but not curious enough to actually touch that dust-infected horror."
My friend nodded, reached in, and took out the book. Then he blew the dust off it. I got to my feet and scrambled around the hole so I could peer over his shoulder and see it. The book was colored red, with golden bindings and an equally golden six-fingered hand on the cover. The number 3 was drawn in black on the hand's palm.
We blinked.
Dipper opened it.
"June 18," he read from the first page. "It's hard to believe it's been six years since I began studying the strange and wondrous secrets of Gravity Falls, Oregon." He turned since the second page was blank. This one was marked 'Floating Eyeballs' in all caps, with pictures of creepy eyeballs hovering in midair and trees behind them. Notes filled the page, as well as really strange markings like ancient writing. Underneath the 'Floating Eyeballs' thing, the author of the journal (I assumed that's what the book was) had penned 'Are they watching me?'
Dipper flipped some more. There was a page on gnomes, cursed doors, and the Gravity Falls Lake's waterfall.
He said in awe, "What is all this?"
"Looks like a journal," I observed.
"No dip."
"Ironic, coming from you, Dipper."
"...Shut up, Leo." He flipped to a page near the back, and started reading again, the excitement in his voice growing with each word. "My suspicions have been confirmed. I am being watched! I must hide this book before he finds it. Remember - - in Gravity Falls, there is no one you can trust."
Below that, in large caps underlined three times, were the words, TRUST NO ONE!
"No one you can trust..." Dipper and I mused, exchanging suspicious looks. Well, that definitely applied to someone we both knew who was old and greedy and definitely not trustworthy.
Two much-too-cheerful shouts from behind us made us jump.
"Hello!"
"Yo, bro!"
"AAH!" Dipper and I screamed. My friend almost dropped Journal 3 in surprise, hugging it closely to his chest.
"Whatcha reading?" the voice of Mabel asked happily.
Libby's voice added, "Some nerd thing?"
"I'm not a nerd!" I huffed, glaring fondly at the blonde.
Dipper turned around, keeping our newest mystery hidden safely behind his back. He stammered, "Uh - - uh - - nothing!"
"Uh - - uh - - nothing!" Mabel mocked, waving her hands around crazily. I frowned at her sweater. It was far too pink. She'd clearly been spending too much time with Libby. "Ha! Are you actually not gonna show us?"
"Yeah, what is it - - your secret journal or something?" Libby added, snickering and fist-bumping Mabel.
We heard the sounds of chewing and looked to see a goat nibbling the corner of Journal 3. It looked strangely familiar, and I realized I'd seen it hanging around and in The Mystery Shack for a while.
"A goat's eating the book," I said.
Dipper blinked. "Uh... let's go somewhere more... private."
We ended up heading back to The Mystery Shack, going into the 'employees only' door and emerging in the living room of the place. The living room wasn't very large, but it was still very... ah, homely. A faded cream rug covered the floor. There was a Cable TV in front of a yellow couch/chair thing. There was also an aquarium with several fish inside it, something like a dinosaur skull in between the aquarium and the couch, and the wall was made of stone. A warm lamp was lit on the couch-side table. A boat in a bottle sat on the aquarium, and stuffed animal heads hung on the walls.
"This is amazing!" Dipper exclaimed, grinning, once we'd settled ourselves. Mabel had claimed the couch/chair's left seat, Libby had snagged the actual seat part of it, and I was stuck sitting on the rug. "Stan said I was being paranoid, but according to this book, Gravity Falls has a secret dark side!"
"Whoa!" gasped Mabel dramatically. "Shut up!"
Libby tilted her head. "Dark side? Whaddya mean, dark side? Dark, like no light?"
I facepalmed. "No, Libby. He means 'dark side' like supernatural."
Dipper was ignoring the casual bickering of us Johnson Twins. "...And get this! Suddenly the pages just stop! Like whoever was writing it mysteriously disappeared!"
The doorbell rang.
Dipper and I blinked.
"Who's that?" the younger boy asked.
Mabel grinned. "Well, time to spill the beans." She knocked over a can of beans that was coincidentally sitting on the dinosaur skull (which, by the way, was super cool). "Heh. Beans. This girl's got a date!"
My blonde sister grinned. "He's weird, but funny!"
Dipper and I looked at each other, ignoring Libby for now. "Wait, in the half hour we were gone, you already found a boyfriend?"
Mabel shrugged cheerfully. "What can I say? I guess I'm just irresistible!"
She waggled her arms for emphasis.
"Somehow 'irresistible' is not the word that comes to mind," I told her seriously. "Actually, if I had to describe you, I'd call you hopelessly unique. Well, besides Libby, but you get the point. You and her are one of a kind. Er, two of a kind."
"Pfft. People love me," said Libby.
"Well, that's 'cause you're more open than the Krusty Krab during the Graveyard Shift episode."
She rolled her eyes. "You totally are a nerd! You're fifteen and you still watch SpongeBob!"
My face turned red. "S-Shut up! It's funny!"
The doorbell rang twice.
"Oh, coming!" Mabel called, straightening her sweater and charging for the side door. Dipper smirked and took up her place on the arm of the couch/chair, opening his book. I scooted behind the dinosaur head and tried to read it with him, but before we could get anywhere, Grunkle Stan walked into the living room from the gift shop, sipping coffee in a paper cup.
He grinned. "Whatcha reading there, slick?"
We jumped and Dipper discreetly dropped Journal 3 in between the dino skull and the couch/chair, slipping a magazine that lay on the skull into his hand and opening to a random page in one fluid motion. Libby blinked owlishly at him
He laughed awkwardly. "Oh, I was just catching up on... Gold Chains for Old Men Magazine?"
The money-grubber nodded seriously and took a sip of his coffee. "That's a good issue."
"Can I ask just why you've subscribed to a magazine featuring gold chains for old men?" I spoke up.
"Hey, family! And friends! Say hello to my new boyfriend!"
Dipper, Grunkle Stan, Libby, and I stopped and turned to look at the hallway, where Mable was grinning widely, her hands behind her pink sweater. A rather tall kid was standing awkwardly next to her, dressed in a black zip-up sweater and baggy jeans. His face was really pale. A rather large lock of brown hair covered his left eye. There was a suspicious red stain on his other cheek.
Mable's boyfriend grinned and waved. "'Sup." His voice was deep and kinda gravelly.
"...Hey..." said Dipper awkwardly.
"How's it hanging?" Grunkle Stan asked.
Libby grinned. "Yo, dude!"
I blinked. "Got any matches?"
Everyone looked at me strangely.
"What? I lost mine in the woods."
Mabel rubbed his arm. "Anyway, I met him at the cemetery. He's really deep." She blinked and squeezed. "Oh! Little muscle there! That... heh heh... what a surprise!"
Dipper raised an eyebrow. "So... what's your name?"
Mabel's boyfriend frowned. "Uh... Normal. Man."
Okay, that was weird.
"He means Norman," said Mabel.
"Are you... bleeding, um, Norman?" I narrowed my eyes.
Norman shrugged. "It's jam."
Mabel gasped and grinned, shoving him playfully. "I love jam! Look at this!"
"So... you wanna go hold hands? Or whatever?"
"Oh! Oh my goodness! Hee hee! Don't wait up!"
Before we really knew it, Mable and Normal Man - - Oh, sorry, 'Norman' - - were gone. Norman accidentally ran into the side of the wall and broke a few vases on his way out. He moved awkwardly, like his body was seriously unsynchronized.
Dipper's eye twitched. I rubbed the back of my head suspiciously. Grunkle Stan had already kicked Libby out of the couch/chair so he could read Gold Chains for Old Men Magazine in it.
There was something about Norman that wasn't right.
We decided to consult the journal.
Dipper led Libby and I to the room he shared with Mabel - - the attic. It was mid-evening, so the sunset that shone through the stained glass window turned a soft red color. The attic was even messier and dustier than the guest room. There wasn't even a carpet, though both beds had bedside stands. Mabel's wall was covered with posters for boys' bands like Sev'ral Times, romantic eighties movies, and Daybreak, that stupid novel about glittering vampires and romantic werewolves. The blanket on Dipper's bed was pretty much patches held together with string. Random boxes and crates filled the back wall, and there was a closet on Dipper's wall.
While Mabel and Norman did whatever outside The Mystery Shack, we flipped through Journal 3 until we found something that looked plausible.
"Known for their pale skin and bad attitudes," Dipper read off a page labeled 'The Undead,' which had a picture of a hooded corpse standing upright with part of its face missing, "These creatures are often mistaken for..." Our eyes widened, and the fear and worry in Dipper's voice grew as the picture of the undead corpse seemed to turn into Norman. "Teenagers!? Beware Gravity Fall's nefarious... ZOMBIE!"
Dipper and I exchanged shocked, worried looks. Could Norman be a zombie? There had been something suspiciously like blood on his face!
"Oh, no!" we shouted. "Mabel!"
We pressed our faces to the stained glass windows. We were able to see Mabel sitting on a picnic table outside, smiling while Norman stalked stiffly toward her, his arms straight out like an undead horror.
Her boyfriend stepped awkwardly nearer.
"No, no, Mabel, watch out!" Dipper pleaded, sweat running off his face.
I desperately dug around in my pocket. I usually kept a packet of matches on hand, because I can only control existing fire, but I remembered that I had lost them. Must've been when that hatch in the ground in the woods opened up and made me fall over.
I gulped. "Crap! It's no good, I don't have any fire!"
"Uh, guys?" Libby spoke up. "You're kind of freaking out. Maybe you two should calm down?"
Norman grabbed Mabel's shoulders, and both Dipper and I tensed. Then he stepped away, and we could see a necklace with flowers stringed to it around her neck. Mabel blinked, grinned widely, blushed, and said something we couldn't hear due to the fact that we were indoors and she was outdoors.
Dipper rubbed his forehead, stepping away from the window. "Is my sister really dating a zombie, or am I just going nuts?"
"You two're are going nuts," my twin sighed.
"There's definitely something weird about Norman," I agreed darkly. "No teenager I know is that pale or that unsynchronized."
"It's a dilemma, to be sure."
Dipper and I nearly had a heart attack; none of us had said that. Then we turned and saw Soos standing on a ladder, replacing a light bulb in the chandelier.
"I couldn't help but overhear you guys talking to each other in this otherwise empty room," Soos said.
Dipper sighed in relief. "Soos, you've seen Mabel's boyfriend. He's gotta be a zombie, right?"
"Hm. How many brains did you see the guy eat?"
"Zero," we admitted, while Libby rolled her eyes.
Soos stopped screwing in the light bulb and looked down at Dipper and I seriously. "Look, dudes, I believe you. I'm always noticing weird stuff in this town. Like the mailman? Pretty sure that dude's a werewolf. But ya gotta have evidence." He pointed his screwdriver at us for emphasis. "Otherwise people are gonna think you're a major league coo-coo clock."
My younger friend let out a heavy breath. "As always, Soos... you're right."
"My wisdom is both a blessing, and a curse."
"Soos!" Grunkle Stan called from downstairs. "The portable toilets are clogged again."
Libby winced. "I see your point."
The handyman straightened his hat. "I am needed elsewhere," he stated, stepping off the ladder and backing up slowly out of the dusty attic.
I sneezed.
My blonde sister giggled. "Your sneezes are louder than Dad's snores!"
"Shut up," I told her, rubbing my nose in embarrassment. "Nothing is louder than Dad's snores! He can snore loud enough to drown out Fourth of July fireworks!"
"Guys," said Dipper, "my sister could be in trouble. It's time to get some evidence."
Libby sighed and messed with her ponytail. "Whatever. But I'm putting my money on Norman being normal!"
Over the next week, Dipper and I followed Mabel and Norman around on their dates, hiding so they wouldn't notice us. Dipper had the good sense to bring along a video camera and film them while I played lookout. Once, they went to the park, where Mabel accidentally threw a Frisbee in Norman's face, causing him to grunt and fall over. Another time, they went to the diner owned by an old lady called Greasy Susan, and we managed to get there before hand and grab two booth seats, holding magazines in front of our faces so we wouldn't be recognized. We saw Norman stick his hand through the window of the door (breaking it in the process) in order to open the door from the other side. It must've gotten locked by accident or something. While Mabel just walked to their booth normally, her boyfriend was as unsynchronized as ever, stepping wildly and spinning around and crashing into random customers. After that, they went home by way of the cemetery. Dipper and I had predicted this and dug a makeshift grave beforehand. Norman stumbled his way into it, and came out covered in mud. He and Mabel blinked at each other, then chuckled awkwardly.
Filming behind a nearby gravestone, Dipper narrowed his eyes. "I've seen enough."
"You need to convince Mabel that he's a zombie," I told him. "Otherwise he could eat her brain!"
"I know." He nodded. "I'll do it this evening."
Later that evening, I was sitting on my bed in the guest room, nervously cracking my fingers and striking matches. (I'd picked up a new packet at the local drug store while I helped Dipper follow Mabel and Norman.) Libby was happily humming along to some love song on the radio app of her iPod. Thankfully, Grunkle Stan had realized a long time ago that having accessible Internet was a great way to attract tourist to The Mystery Shack.
"Norman has to be a vampire," I muttered. "There's just no other explanation for how weird he is!"
Libby sighed and pulled out her earplugs. "Look, Leo. Maybe Norman's just a normal guy. Did you ever think about that? Zombies don't exist! They're only in movies! Whoever wrote that journal you and Dipper found in the woods is, as Soos would say, a major league coo-coo clock."
I stared at her. "Libby, people would say that the ability to control fire and wind isn't real, yet we can do it ourselves! If we can use some form of magic or whatever, who's to say that zombies don't exist?"
"Okay, you make a good point. But still, you don't have any evidence that Norman's an actual zombie. Maybe there's nothing spooky going on in Gravity Falls. Maybe you two're are just paranoid."
"What if we're right, and Mabel gets her brain eaten, turning her into a zombie, too!?"
"They've been dating for almost a week now, Leo. Norman could've eaten her brain at anytime."
I groaned. "Okay, maybe he's not a zombie. But he has to be something like that! He - - he never blinks. I've been following Norman around for days, and I haven't seen him blink once."
"Alright," Libby admitted, "that's weird."
"And anyway, what if there's more people like us in Gravity Falls? What if the author of the journal has met people like us before?" I leaned forward on my bed. "What if... what if he's written a page on our powers?"
Her eyes widened. Now I'd interested her. "You mean... you mean that we could find out how we can control fire and wind."
I nodded.
She hesitated.
"Uh... well..."
"LEO! LIBRA!" Dipper shouted suddenly, bursting through the door of the guest room, panting heavily and holding his video camera. "Mabel's going out on another date right now, and I just found something in my tapes! I have proof that Norman's a zombie!"
"Proof?" Libby said skeptically.
I leaped off my bed. "Show us! Now!"
Dipper nodded quickly and motioned for us all to gather around. We did so and watched as he rewound the camera footage. There was a clip of him falling flat on his face after trying to play hopscotch, and then the next reel showed him wrapping his arm around Mabel. The camera was shooting from the back. As we watched, Norman's hand fell off, he glanced around nervously... and then stuck it back on his arm.
We nearly fell over in shock.
"Wait, WHAT!?" Libby exclaimed, eyes as wide as dinner plates. "HIS HAND FELL OFF! AND HE PUT IT BACK ON!"
"We were right!" I gasped.
Dipper nodded wildly, fear written on his face. "Yeah! We've gotta go get Grunkle Stan! I think he's outside showing some tourists new attractions!"
We charged out the room, our hearts pounding with anxiety. This was crazy! We'd just seen proof that the dreams of Hollywood producers everywhere were right! I almost couldn't believe it. I wondered how a zombie could even exist in the first place - - some kind of man-made virus? Maybe the result of intense nuclear radiation? It was anyone's guess, but the reason didn't really matter at the time. The one thing we did know was that Dipper's sister and Libby's best friend might die!
With Dipper leading, we dashed outside and around the house. Near the front door, Grunkle Stan was unveiling his latest (also fake) hi-jink: A rock that looked like a face.
"Behold!" he was saying. "Here we have the Rock-That-Looks-Like-A-Face Rock - - a rock that looks like a face."
"Does it look like a rock?" someone asked.
Grunkle Stan blinked. "...No. It looks like a face."
"Is it a face?"
"It's a rock that looks like a face!"
The crowd of tourists mumbled amongst themselves in confusion.
"Grunkle Stan!" we called desperately, trying to be seen over the crowds. "Grunkle Stan! Hey! Free money!"
But he was too distracted to hear us. "No! For the fifth time, it's, it's not an actual face!"
There was the sound of Stan's golf cart pulling up to The Mystery Shack. We blinked and looked to the dirt parking lot to see Wendy stepping out of it. She must've been off on some errand. The cart was pretty much a normal golf cart, though it had a bed above its trunk like a truck, and it had a red question mark on the hood. The roof was salmon pink canvas.
"Wendy!" Dipper gasped in relief.
We ran over to her quickly as she shut it down.
"Wendy!" we panted with near-panic. "Wendy! We need to borrow the golf cart so we can save Mabel from a zombie!"
The ginger blinked, then casually handed me the keys and walked off. "Try not to hit any pedestrians!" she said.
We grinned.
I jumped into the driver's seat, Dipper claimed shotgun, and Libby was stuck with the bed. I stabbed the keys into the keyhole, twisted them to 'on,' and did all the necessary stuff to start the golf cart. The engine roared beautifully to life. We backed up so we could head out into the spooky part of the woods, where Dipper said Norman had walked with Mabel.
"Dudes, it's me! Soos!" said Soos loudly. I put the brakes on and saw him standing on the road next to Dipper, holding three shovels and a baseball bat. He handed us the shovels and we stowed them with Libby on the bed. "These are for the zombies."
"Thanks!" we breathed, smiling. Soos was awesome!
Then he handed Dipper the baseball bat. "And this is in case you see a piñata!
He blinked and put it with the shovels. "Um... thanks?"
I raised an eyebrow, switched into drive, and floored the gas pedal.
"BETTER SAFE THAN SORRY!" Soos called as we sped away.
I twisted the wheel, causing us to the hug the curves and gain as much time as we could. A scared, slightly angry scream rose up in the forest, sounding suspiciously like Mabel.
Dipper shouted, "We're coming, Mabel! We're gonna save you from the zombies!"
We twisted around another curve in the road.
"Help!"
"Hold on!" I shouted.
I turned off the path, heading for where I thought Mabel's voice had come from. The ground dipped suddenly and we increased speed. Then it flattened out, and we entered a hole in a really large, wide tree. I hit the brakes and we came to a stop, just in time to see... a bunch of little guys with beards and pointy hats strapping Mabel to the ground?
Mabel managed to punch one of the little human-like creatures aside, and it barfed rainbows.
We rolled to a stop and piled out of the gold cart, staring.
Dipper lifted his shovel. "What the heck is going on here?"
"That's a really good question," Libby said, her eye twitching.
"Dipper, Leo, Libby!" Mabel called. "Norman turned out to be a bunch of gnomes, and they're total jerks!"
Dipper blinked. "Gnomes?"
"Wow, we were way off," I said, staring at the sight of the gnomes tying Mabel up. "This is weird."
The kid opened up Journal 3 and flipped to a page labeled, Gnomes. "Gnomes," he recited. "Little men of the Gravity Falls forest. Weaknesses: Unknown."
"Aw, come on!" Mabel complained.
Dipper scowled and ran forward, pointing to a gnome who stood off to the side. "Hey, hey! Let go of my sister!"
"Oh, hey there!" the gnome said awkwardly, turning. He was about as tall as my ankle, and he had a brown beard. "Ha, ha! You know - - this is all just a big misunderstanding. You see, your sister's not in any danger. She's just marrying all one thousand of us and becoming our gnome queen for all eternity." He smiled at Mabel. "Isn't that right, honey?"
"You guys are butt-faces!" Mabel shouted helpfully. The gnome who'd puked rainbows quickly covered her mouth.
We narrowed our eyes and pointed our shovels at him, demanding in unison, "Give her back right now or else!"
He narrowed his eyes dangerously. "You think you can stop us, boys and girl? The gnomes are a powerful race! Do not trifle with - -"
Dipper, blinking, simply scooped the little guy off the rock he stood on with the shovel, then tossed him aside. We charged the group of gnomes around Mabel, then used the sharp edges of our shovels to cut her bonds. She shoved them away, and we led her to the golf cart.
The gnome leader (I assumed he was the leader at least) groaned. "They're getting away with our queen! No, no, no!"
This time, Dipper took the driver's seat, while Mabel got shotgun and Libby and I were forced to crouch awkwardly in the bed. I tried not to sit on the shovels or the baseball bat. Dipper drove out of the tree cave and up the hill, then turned back onto the path.
"Hurry!" begged Mabel worriedly. "Before they come after us!"
Dipper grinned at her confidently. "Ah, I wouldn't worry about that. They're gnomes, you see. Those suckers are tiny. They can't run that fast."
Two very large vibrations in the ground made the golf cart jump in the air. My stomach dropped and Libby and I bounced painfully on the bed. Dipper slammed the brakes as a large, pointy-headed shadow fell over us.
"What was that?" I demanded.
We turned around.
And saw a giant creature made of hundreds of gnomes, with pointed teeth, snarling. It was bigger than the trees. Just one of its feet could totally smash the golf cart.
Libby's voice was small. "Dang."
At the very pinnacle of the pointy head was the leader. "Alright, teamwork," he said, glowering at us. "Like we practiced!"
It started running.
"MOVE!" Libby, Mabel, and I screamed, our eyes wide. "MOVE, MOVE!"
Gulping, Dipper floored the gas pedal. A very large fist slammed into the ground just where we'd been.
I pulled out a match, struck it, and willed the flame to get larger. It became a massive fireball that I held in my hand. The heat made me sweat, but it didn't hurt me.
"An elementalist!?" the lead gnome growled. "Don't tell me you're a Gravity Fallen! I hate those guys!"
I blinked. "A Gravity Fallen?" Shrugging it off as less important than evading a giant monster that could turn us into human pancakes with one step, I hurled the fireball at the huge gnome-giant thing. It flew through the air and scored a direct hit on the creature's big, ugly head.
And fizzled out without leaving even a first degree burn.
"WHAT!?" I screeched.
"It's getting closer!" Mabel exclaimed, looking over her shoulder.
Libby grinned. "Step on it!"
I winced. "Mabel, your braces are reflecting sunlight directly into my eyes."
"Oh, sorry."
She faced forward again.
"Libby, try your wind thing!" Dipper told her.
My twin shrugged. "It's no good. It only works with natural wind. I can't control wind created by going fast."
"Dang it!"
Suddenly, gnomes were flying at us. One landed on Mabel's door, and she angrily swatted it away with the back of her fist. A second tried to attack Dipper. He simply grabbed it and furiously slammed it against the horn a few times, unintentionally honking. He tossed it out the cart.
"Schmebulock!" it groaned as it crashed to the ground.
Two more attacked Libby and I. I defended myself with fire and kicked the first aside, while Libby used the updraft my fire created to send the second soaring. I high-fived her.
"Nice!"
Yet another one landed on the hood and jumped Dipper, clawing at his face.
Mabel shot daggers at it. "I'll save you Dipper!"
-BAM! WHAP! BONK!-
It went flying, still holding onto Dipper's pine tree hat.
"Thanks, Mabel," Dipper groaned.
"Don't mention it."
As if it wasn't enough that we'd been mauled by gnomes, we heard the sound of a tree being uprooted from the ground. Then, a very large tree indeed hurtled over the golf cart.
"Look out!" Libby cried, grinning.
"I'm on it!" I shouted, already setting it on fire and burning it to ashes. Unfortunately, I didn't burn it quick enough and Dipper was forced to swerve around it. He lost control of the wheel and the golf cart spun crazily as The Mystery Shack came into view, tipping over and dumping us into the Shack's parking lot.
I groaned and rubbed my head. "Everyone alright?"
"Yeah," Mabel moaned painfully.
Dipper crawled out from under the golf cart as the gnome creature loomed over us. I gulped, fear chilling my blood. Fire couldn't hurt it. There was no natural wind, not even a slight breeze, that would enable Libby to use her powers. Dipper desperately threw a shovel at it, but it fell short.
Nothing could hurt it. What do we do? WE'RE GONNA DIE!
The gnome-giant punched the ground, making us scream and huddle together.
"Uh, where's Grunkle Stan?" Dipper asked nervously, his voice cracking.
"Doesn't matter. What could he do about that thing?" Libby pointed out.
The creature advanced on us and we backed into the wall of the Shack. A pile of leaves was on our left, and a row of bushes was on our right. There was nowhere to run.
"It's the end of the line, kids!" the gnome at the top declared, pointing at us. "Mabel, marry us before we do something crazy!"
"There's gotta be a way out of this!" Dipper said, starting to slide Journal 3 out of his vest pocket.
Mabel sighed and stepped forward, shaking her head. "I've gotta do it."
"What!?" I gasped.
Libby's eyes widened. "Are you insane?"
"Trust me," she said.
We stared. "What?"
"Trust me, guys. Just this once! Trust me!"
Libby, Dipper, and I looked at each other, blinking in confusion. Then we nodded slowly and stepped away, raising our hands in surrender.
"Alright, Jeff," said Mabel reluctantly. "I'll marry you."
The creature stomped. The gnome at the top, who must've been Jeff, started climbing down. "Hot dog! Help me down there, Jason, Andy - - alright, heh heh, there we go. Watch those fingers, Mike."
The brown-bearded gnome stepped up to our friend and held out a box containing a ring, grinning. Mabel looked away, smiled, and held out her finger. Jeff slipped it on.
"Ba da bing, ba da bam!" cheered Jeff, doing a joyful jig. "Now let's get you back to the forest, honey!"
"You may now kiss the bride."
The gnome blinked and paused, then grinned slyly. "Well. Don't mind if I do!"
He puckered his lips and closed his eyes, and while he wasn't looking, Mabel reached behind the leaf pile and pulled out... a leaf blower? She turned it onto reverse, and Jeff's eyes shot open with surprise.
"HUH!?" the gnome exclaimed, backing up. "Hey, hey, wait a minute - -"
"Where'd that come from?" I wondered.
Libby blinked. "Oh, I remember now. She put that there after her accident with it when she was practicing kissing."
"When she what?"
Jeff was slowly being sucked into it. "Whoa, whoa, what's going on!?" he gulped, trying to get out of the force pulling him in. It was no use. He was sucked into the leaf blower's tube.
"That's for lying to me!" Mabel grumbled. She cranked it to full reverse. Jeff's face was squashed. "That's for breaking my heart!" She pointed the leaf blower up at the center of the gnome-giant. "And this is for messing with my brother and my best friends!"
We all smirked. Mabel winked at Dipper. "Wanna do the honors?"
He nodded and placed a hand on the dial. "On three! One, two, three!" Dipper pushed it forward as far as it could go. Jeff was catapulted into the creature, breaking it apart like a piñata and continuing out into the forest.
"I'LL GET YOU BACK FOR THIS!" he shrieked.
The rest of the gnomes fell across The Mystery Shack's dirt parking lot. A cool breeze blew. Libby grinned and pointed her finger at them, controlling the wind to make it super fast. The gnomes were scooped up off the dirt parking lot and carried off into the forest, almost as if by an invisible being or a ghost.
We strolled back to the Shack, grinning at our strange victory, but before we entered, Mabel said, "Hey, Dipper, Leo."
We paused and looked at her.
"...Sorry for ignoring your advice. I should've realized you were just looking out for me."
"Yeah, same," Libby agreed sadly.
"Don't be like that!" Dipper said, grinning and waving his hand dismissively. "You guys saved our butts back there!"
I smirked. "Yeah, totally! If it hadn't been for Mabel's leaf blower and Libby's wind powers, we might've been in some serious trouble!"
Libby blinked. "You mean it?"
"Yeah, definitely!"
Mabel sighed. "I guess I'm just sad that my first boyfriend turned out to be a bunch of gnomes."
"Look on the bright side - - maybe the next one will be a vampire!" her brother told her with a shrug.
"Ha. You're just saying that."
"...Awkward sibling hug?"
Mabel smiled and nodded. "Awkward sibling hug."
The hugged awkwardly and patted each other on the back. "Pat, pat."
I burst into laughter. "Pat, pat! Oh, that's hilarious!"
Covered in leaves from the leaf pile and dirt from crashing the golf cart, we entered The Mystery Shack to see Grunkle Stan at the counter. Sometime while we were fighting the gnomes, night had already fallen, so I hadn't realized just how dirty we all were. Stan did, though, and stared.
"Yeesh," he said. "You guys get hit by a bus or something?" He laughed and slapped the table at the idea of us getting hit by a bus. We looked at each other and rolled our eyes, sighed, and started to walk through the gift shop to the 'Employees Only' door. But an awkward, "Hey!" from Grunkle Stan made us pause.
The four of us looked back.
"W-Wouldn't you know it?" said Grunkle Stan, clearing his throat. "I accidentally overstocked some inventory this morning, so... uh, how's about each of you take one item from the gift shop. On the house, you know?"
Mabel grinned. "Really?"
"Something's off here," I said, narrowing my eyes.
"What's the catch?" Dipper asked, folding his arms.
"The catch is do it before I change my mind. Now take something."
Grinning at each other, we started checking out the merchandise. Dipper, the first to choose something, found a blue and white hat with a pine tree on it to replace his old green one.
"That oughta do the trick!" he said happily.
Libby was examining an orange shirt with an ankh on it. "Hey, orange looks good on me, and this is my size."
"Think I'd look good with a tattoo?" I questioned, eying a set of water-removable tattoos, specifically a set of bonfire tattoos.
Dipper shrugged. "Yeah, maybe."
Mabel rummaged around a cardboard box. "And I will have a... grappling hook! Yes!" she exclaimed, pulling out said object.
We all stared at her.
Grunkle Stan blinked. "Wouldn't you rather have, like, a doll or something?"
Mabel shot the hook at the ceiling and retracted the string, causing herself to hang on the ceiling. "Grappling hook!" she confirmed with a wide grin.
"Fair enough!" said our host.
And you know what? I learned something today. That journal Dipper found said that in Gravity Falls, you could trust no one. When you fight a bunch of crazy gnomes side-by-side with someone, you start to realize you can trust them. Also, Grunkle Stan said there was nothing strange about this town. But who knows what other secrets are waiting to be unlocked?
Whoa! Okay, I really did NOT mean to make it that long. Sorry about that. Anyway, there you go - - Leo can control fire, but only if it already exists. Libra can control wind, but only if it's already blowing naturally. Both of their abilities are pretty powerful, so I decided to grant them these limitations to keep them from becoming Gary Stus and Mary Sues.
Also, there's something else I should mention. This series is going to be following the original Gravity Falls storyline. That means that every episode will be included, though sometimes Leo and Libby will be doing something completely different from what the Pines Twins are. That also means ZERO Pinecest. I'll probably include my own ideas, too.
Please follow and/or favorite this story! I promise I'll try to make the next chapters shorter than this. Oh, and doing that isn't necessary for me to continue writing. I would like it if all of you viewers would leave a comment, however. Maybe you could give me an OC or a new chapter idea? No flames please!
-TheRealEvanSG