Camp Toccoa

September 23rd, 1942

I haven't been home in years, making me deprived and aching for the feel of the warm summer air, the smell of the gumbo from down the street at the local restaurant called Benny's, the sweet sounds of the trumpets and accordion that would float down the street and haunt the night like it was the melody of God himself. But being away for so long, being away from those haunting yet perfect scented images and past feelings were the only kinds of senses and memories that would really hold me together. At least, the parts of me that weren't shattered from all that I had to no longer hold onto.

I have been away from New Orleans for far too long.

This place, though I've been used to it for about a year now, it's nothing compared to home. I was not accustomed to the heat in the summer that seemed too humid and too dense for someone to live through the year by year. But we had to go through it, it was part of the deal of being in the army. Sometimes I would wake up from the bed and wonder how I ever made it this far into the army since I was part of some kind of rare group that weren't like the rest of the soldiers there at the training camp. It was brutal, far more brutal than the others because….well….I was one out of 10 females in the whole goddamn training camp.

We were a different breed that the army has never seen before.

At first, when I was enlisting myself into the army, they were really going to consider me as a member of the Women's Auxiliary Army Corp and make sure I was not going to get a weapon in my hand. But after they asked me to do some of the training procedures that they would ask he men before they were sworn in, and I went through with flying colors because of my ballet training and the flexibility and strength behind my arms and legs, I knew I changed their minds.

Really, all I wanted to do was get away from my life I thought I hated back at New Orleans, back with my mother and how she was still disappointed with me, but they were going to give me something more. The Captain, Captain Matthews of the Special Operations Unit that was going to be labeled as the Mamba Unit, was there for my evaluation saw that within me, he hired me on as one of his soldier within his regiment, other women came before and after me that were soldier worthy and not even close to being able to sit behind a desk and type up reports. For one, I just wanted to get out of my town and get try to forget, but this was far beyond what I had in mind.

To be a soldier.

I was trained in push ups and sit ups instead of the arabesque and coupé, running up and down hills instead of leaping back and forth along the hardwood floor of a studio, and then learning how to shoot a gun was the most intense of them all. The men at the camp were unconvinced of us keeping up with them, and yet we would prove them wrong time after time. Whether it was in push ups to see who would last before they would faint, or even who would shoot closest to the target without overshoot. I was the best at that, also going through the training in the woods without being seen of heard. It was a perfect being a female, knowing how to move better than the males and how to sneak in and out from a place and out of men's hands. They were starting to realize, both the privates that challenged us and myself mostly, and the officers who were holding our futures in the army within their hands, how much of an asset we were becoming for them.

At first, I thought it would make me feel a bit out of place and out of my own mind really to shoot a luger out in the air at a target in front of me, but I had reassurance from the Captain whom I was going to take orders from. Instantly, we were told that our first names were no longer going to be used, because of the massive delicate fact that we were still being looked down on from the others in the army. Having females in the army that were not behind a desk and not taking orders from men, that seemed too scandalous for others to really drink in. According to society, we were far too delicate, but according to us.

We were perfect for the job.

I trained in the Special Operations unit that they placed us in for a year, learning how to shoot first from a gun and then promoting me to working with a rifle. Out of all of the women they enlisted in the Specials Ops unit, which they called the Black Mamba Initiative, I was told had the best movement and the fastest on the squad. I had ballet training to thank for that, and they were training me to be more of a sniper than anything since I could get in and out of places without being seen or heard. I was stealth and strong, some of the men almost seeing me in a mother bear kind of way with the unit, which made me no longer think of myself as the graceful ballerina I was before.

I was fierce and a deadly force.

The army, my unit and the women I was working with, all of it was becoming my life now little by little, and I had no real reason to stop it or go back. I never once told my parents what I was doing, not even my sister and her little boy named Jasper that she had with her husband with their perfect life in New Orleans. I never felt as connected and into that family, so with the little pocket money I had left to my own and my spare job at the ballet studio, and I didn't turn back. I was now used to the bitter army food, running miles and miles a day, shutting guns and doing drills enough to make my own head feel scrambled. The muscles I had from ballet were morphing into muscles for running and fighting like a soldier, the flexibility stayed, and my head was being filled with tactics and plans beyond my own normal mind would take in.

Nothing else mattered to me, only of what I can do with my life from there on out and how I wanted it to play out. After at least a year of training and getting good to the point of them not knowing what to do with me, they made me 2nd Lieutenant without blinking twice and thought I was good for officer material.

But not yet.

They were still on the fence about women being in the army, and for them to have me be in charge of a group of men and be fine with it, that was almost suicide really on their part since they didn't know what I was going to do. I wanted to prove to them that I was worthy enough to lead, lead either males or females and not let anything or anyone gets in my way. I may not have been in command since the commander of the Unit was Captain Josephine from Oregon, a top upper lip leader who knew not to take any prisoners. It made me second in command, right after her and following her without any second guessing on my part. There were only 15 of us in the unit since the rest did not make the cut under Captain Matthews.

Our mission as the Black Mamba Unit was to grab any foreign information that would be needed for us to get close to victory. We were going to go behind enemy lines, which sounded like a cuisine mission.

Maybe that was why they chose women to do it.

"Lieutenant Bellerose, may I speak to you?" I looked back up from my bed where I was sitting, my mind coming again back to reality since I was zoning out. It was late into the morning in the barracks where we were staying, the rest of the girls were off training with Mathews now in the concept on communication and German dialect. I was more fluent in French since it was our natural second language in my family, German was not really needed for me. I was glad not to learn the language since it was going to be a bit more difficult for me to wrap my head around, so they made me the head translator for anything that involved the French language.

I was thinking of my home, back in New Orleans and how light it looked in the sunset. It was a pale yellow with white trim, a victorian mansion that was sitting on Saint Charles Avenue with a low black iron gate and a grand within the front where my mother planted and kept up to par. There was a large tree that hung in the front yard, big enough for me to reach out from my window and leap out to when I was in my rebellious stage and would escape from the house every once in awhile. It was a perfect house for the wealthy cotton-pickin' families that wouldn't dare to start waves or cause trouble. At least not out in the open.

Walking over to the door where I saw Captain Josephine, I moved my hair over from my eyes and cracked my knuckles a bit before taking out a deep breath. Sometimes as of late I was feeling like I had to be on the tip of my toes when I was talking with my Captain, not that she was a bad Captain. In fact, she was a good one, fair and just for all of us in the Black Mamba Unit to listen to and follow for guidance, not to mention she was a fierce fighter and could kill a man with her fingers alone. Recently, within the lat couple of weeks, we were wondering when we were going to be shipped out to Europe, or even the Pacific for that matter. So far, we were just waiting for the call and we were out of here. But the more as were waiting and just training left and right, the less optimistic we were getting about being able to help out with the war. Even I was still wrapping my head around me being in the middle of a war, almost thinking in the back of my head that we wouldn't go. it wasn't that I wasn't ready.

I was still a bit afraid that we were in a war in general.

"What is it, Captain?" I asked her now as we were standing in front of the barracks now. I saw how she stood there next to me, like the leader she truly was and how she was carrying herself even in front of all of the privates that were marching by us. We were a hot topic with the other companies and soldiers there at Camp Tacocoa since we started there we've been on everyone's lips and minds about why we were there, training with the men and learning how to shoot and fight like them with basic training. She had long brown hair that she kept tightly with her braid going down her back and her uniform precise, having us all feel like a failure right next to her.

"Captain Mathews just had a conversation with Colonel Sink," Captain Josephine explained to me with her cool tone as I eyed her now in suspicion.

"Colonel Sink? From the infantry division, ma'am?" I asked her no in wonder.

"Yes, apparently Sink has his eye on our unit and is maybe really considering bringing in our Special Ops unit to work under his command," She explained to me now, seeing her look out into the distance with her hands behind her back and having it a bit difficult for me to read what she was thinking on her face. She knew how to play a good face, whether or not she was under pressure.

"He's been the only known officer that has shown real interest in our unit, ma'am." I voiced to her.

"If that is the case, then Mathews will be promoted to Major and that might also leave you to be promoted to 1st Lieutenant since you're 18 months with the army is coming along soon," She said, finally looking over at me now with a small smile on her face. I considered her as a friend, nothing or less than that and I knew she was going to look out for the best in the other girls and me. None of us were under the ranking of Sergeant, which made us all a bit more on the superior scale with the men there.

"Thank you, Ma'am…I think," I said to her in an honest manner, hearing her chuckle in front of her as she motioned over to where I knew most of the office buildings were within the middle of Camp Toccoa.

"Sink also is trying to find a sniper instructor for some of his men within the 101st, and Mathews recommended you since you're quick good with the rifle," Captain Josephine explained to me now, having me shift a bit now and think about it for a moment. I was a good shot, compared to the others in the unit, but I knew I wasn't the best. There had to be other good snipers, if not the best kind of snipers within Camp Toccoa that were not me, so why was I a thought to Colonel Sink and in his eyesight.

"If you don't me asking, ma'am, why would Sink want me to be one of his instructors?" I asked her now in a polite tone since I wanted to hear her own opinion.

"He sees you as a true potential as a sniper within the army, don't you see yourself as that?" She asked me back, having me pause and think about it for a moment or two before I would even answer her. She wanted to see why I would doubt myself with something like this since we were a confident unit and never once should any kind of weakness in front of anyone, including the men. It was another kind of training that we had to go through, building up our confidence and our esteem to the point that literally thong would slow us down and underestimate us.

"I do, ma'am. But I also know there are better snipers that more appropriate for the job to teach others, ma'am." I said to her in all honesty.

"Sink sees a good amount of faith within our own unit that should be recognized, as does Captain Mathews and myself when it comes to you and how you are a leader for the others," Captain Josephine explained kindly to me as I saw her cross her arms in front of me, "But then again, I can always talk to Mathews and let him know you're no interested in showing the men how to really be a sniper instead of amateurs that we see them to be,"

That was the one part that would make me smile

I was not the biggest fan of smoking before I came to the army, but since I joined up and was getting more and more anxiety from thinking of home and how my family was doing, not to mention how the vigorous training that was happening in the army, it made me start to smoke every once in the blue moon when I needed it. Lord knows that day I needed a smoke.

It left me standing outside my barracks while the other girls were writing home and talking to each other now as I was still trying to think about how they wanted to hire me as one of the instructors for the rifle. I didn't feel qualified enough, such doubtful thing to think about, not to mention how I was still trying to adjust to the fact that I would be sent somewhere to fight in the war. I would wonder how my own parents would really think about that if they still had any idea where I was and if I was okay. My relatives could only lie to them for so long, and then the truth was going to come out and I would have to answer them for him.

I grabbed the smokes I knew I stored in my jacket, grabbing the carton and then pulling out a stick for me to place between my lips. I then echoed into my same pocket for my lighter that I grabbed on my second day at the camp from another soldier as a way of winning a bet that I can do more pushups than him. It was a bit of pride for me, and it was only my second day.

I lit the stick, inhaling it and feeling the smoke invade my lungs like it was a welcome home kind of feel for me as I then exhaled it through my lips and held the cigarette between my fingers. I hated how my brain was still rattled and trying to unwind from all that has happened to me with the past few years or so. Leaving my family, joining the army with small hopes that I would just be away from them and find my own kind of destiny which sounded insane, and hoping to find my own way in the world. But never did I think that I would be in this kind of lifestyle that also meant that I would even die from this.

I inhaled again, hearing some men walking by near me and having me look over to see who it would be. Of course, another round of privates walking along the grass now in their running attire. I assumed that they already came back down from running down Currahee mountain, a regular routine for all of the companies in the army there at the camp to do both in the morning and at night. Some of them did fine, others were pushed more than the regular. It looked the same with theses men who were all sweating and looking like they were about to be sick. I felt sorry for them really, yet I would d the same thing with my own unit from time to time. We've been down that road too, and I only wished for the best for those men. I really did.

Some of them were looking right a time a they were walking by, faces that were plenty of interest, curiosity, confusion in seeing me in a uniform, intrigue, and lastly, with a hint of wonder in their eyes. I looked at them back, saying nothing as I was inhaling again, hearing the door behind me that was at the barracks open up now and I looked to see who it was. It was Sergeant O'Neal, another you woman who was pretty good was being stealthy and was another good friend of mine. She was snarky, smart as a whip, and had a bit of an attitude when it came to others looking down at her.

"You smokin' out here again? Good grief, those things will kill you before we even see any kind of fighting." She avoided me as the men were still walking by and staring at the bath of us. I shrugged my shoulders then, not knowing what else to say to her as I exhaled through my lips.

"Best to get myself killed now, right?" I asked her nonchalantly, seeing her eyes me now and then grin at me. She knew now the kind of sick and weird jokes that I would use, and she would accept them, fully.

"You just wait, we're gonna have the best time out there fighting for the boys and showing them who can really hang, you best believe," She said in a grin to me, pretty hearty as I inhaled once more, but pausing since something caught my eye and made me freeze as the smoke was escaping my lips. Someone was watching me.

One of them was watching me.

He had black hair, cropped in the army fashion, of course, but it almost looks too dark to be black, maybe a blue for the signets hitting it just right. He also looked a bit pale, like he was never a person ho was right to be in the sun and survive the heat, but yet it complimented him and not made him look rather odd. Lastly, his eyes were too dark and almost inviting for me to just look at me was watching me like I was the most investing thing he has ever seen. I was used to the looks that others were giving me, but his look was more friendly and entranced at the same time. I honestly froze there since that kind of look was meant for someone else, not someone like me.

"Come on, let's go back inside," O'Neal said to me from the side, having me blink one or twice before I looked back over at her now and I watched her roll her eye and walk back over to the barracks. I looked back in front of me to find the man who watched me, who he was long gone with his friends and the other in his company now. They all walked away, having me stand there alone as the sun was now gone behind Currahee mountain. I sighed, throwing the butt away o the ground and putting it out with my foot.

What in the hell was going on with me?