Disclaimer: We don't own Harry Potter or the Big Bang Theory.
Harry Potter was having a pretty crap summer with the Dursleys, as per usual. Only this summer was even worse, what with Sirius being dead, and no chance of rescue from Ron or Hermione, who were both away at wizarding PGL. (The Dursleys hadn't let Harry go; it was Hogsmeade all over again). Harry was moping in his room about three weeks in to a miserable, wet, English summer, dreaming about his boyfriend Draco (there was no chance of seeing him either, as the Malfoy's didn't exactly approve of their love), when suddenly, he heard an explosion from downstairs. Images of Mr Weasley exploding the fireplace two years ago flashed through Harry's mind, and he raced downstairs, hope blossoming in his chest. Except, bursting into the sitting room, it wasn't the Weasleys he saw… but Draco.
"Babes!" Harry shrieked, jumping into Malfoy's arms. And they snogged passionately, in front of the Dursleys and everything.
"You know how you said last term that you'd never been on holiday?" Draco asked with a glint in his steely grey eyes.
"Yeah…" Harry wished Draco would spit it out, anticipation was killing him.
"I've stolen my father's money and I'm taking you to America!"
Harry was lost for words. Draco climbed onto his Nimbus 2001, pulling Harry on behind him, and they flew out of the window, to the horror of the thunderstruck Dursleys. As they zoomed into the clouds and away from Privet Drive, Harry let out a laugh for the first time in a month.
The pair landed in sunny California, hoping to take advantage of the golden beaches and baking weather. After a heavenly day spent together, they returned to the hotel room Draco had managed to book last minute and curled up in bed, snuggled in each other's arms. As Harry slowly drifted off to sleep, his mind replayed Draco's heroic kidnapping, and a small lazy smile crept onto his face.
The next morning, the couple decided to visit the zoo. Whilst ambling through the reptile house, Draco spotted a scaly tail poking out through two fake rocks. Harry couldn't resist reminding him of their first date at the duelling club, so he leant close to the glass. A harsh hissing sound escaped his lips and the snake inside reacted immediately, excited to have a proper conversation about something other than dead rats. Draco watched in awe, oblivious to the fact that they were discussing nothing more exciting than the weather (to be fair, Harry had only just met the snake, any other conversation would have been a bit awkward). Suddenly, they heard a voice behind them shout, "You speak Parseltongue?" Frozen on the spot, they exchanged a worried glance.
Sheldon and Amy had been enjoying their time at the zoo, even if Sheldon had spent far too long outside the koala enclosure, making Amy slightly jealous. Things began to pick up when, whilst watching turtles chew on lettuce leaves, they saw a couple in the corner, their backs turned away, watching a snake as it faced them, rearing up as one boy whispered to it. As they watched, it became clear to Sheldon that this boy was conversing with it, and he stepped forward to confront him. He watched, eyebrows raised, as the teenagers turned round.
Both couples stepped back in shock.
"You're Harry Potter!" Amy squealed.
"You're the Shamy!" retorted Harry, baffled.
"Oh my gosh, you guys are my OTP," Draco fanboyed.
The four stood completely confused in this strange turn of events.