Chapter 1: Homecoming
"Wow the sun is already coming up." I whispered, tiredly while looking at the orange horizon. The same orange color that Naruto would always wear. I sighed and quickly became annoyed. It used to be Sasuke this, Sasuke that, so much that it started to get on my own nerves after he left the village, but even worst now… it's Naruto this & Naruto that… but why? They've both been gone for two, almost three years now. I've been training so hard with Lady Tsunade, I haven't had the time to think about boys like I did during my academy days, but Naruto wasn't just a boy. He was my comrade, my support, he was this type of person you didn't see every day.
I remember how annoying I used to think he was. As if he was really trying to get in between Sasuke and me… as if there was anything to get between. I had to learn that the hard way. Sasuke left the village and thought only about power and revenge. I guess I could understand that, but he wasn't who I thought he was. Not at all. I guess that just go to shows how naïve I really was… but ugh now I have a new problem on my hands!
"Sakura are you listening?!" Ino hollered at me, with her hand on her hip. She rolled her aqua blue eyes, tossing her long blond ponytail behind her back. "Of course you weren't. Well, I'm sure you remember Lady Tsunade's orders, so I'll be on my way." She chirped, waving good bye before heading off towards the Yamanaka Flower Shop to take up her shift.
I almost did forget Lady Tsunade's orders, thank god she reminded me. I'm always such a ditz, thinking about stupid boys whenever I have the time. Well, one boy…
"Shikamaru? Is that you?" I called out, seeing him lean against the wooden pole that held up the Konoha entrance sign. I ran over to him with what little energy I had. "So you're back?" I pointed out, reaching for the scroll he held.
"I'm exhausted, but all hell almost broke loose. It was diverted." He yawned, cracking his knuckles. I observed the information that I was advised to do so and completed the finishing touches to it, handing it back to Shikamaru with a sealing jutsu.
"Work smarter not harder is your motto." I laughed off, before yawning myself. The sun was rising but the air was still so cold and crisp. My hair was a mess but since I cut it again recently it sure has helped during missions. Long hair really does get in the way with being a ninja. "Lady Tsunade should be waiting for us." We headed to her office, not saying much. We both were beat.
"Who is it?" Lady Tsunade called out annoyed, after hearing three consistent knocks on her door.
"Sakura and Shikamaru, m'lady." I answered, through the wood.
"Sakura-chan?! Shikamaru?!"
"Ah, yes. Come in you two." She replied, I walked in with Shikamaru beside me, I leaned over with lit up eyes. Her red painted nails on her brittle hands that were folded nicely under her chin. She smirked as soon as she saw me.
"Naruto?!" I couldn't help but notice that blond spikey hair and that goofy nostalgic smile. Seeing him really brought me back, I felt my face heat up and my stomach twist. My jaw nearly dropped. He ran to me, he had his hands tucked behind his neck like he always had. He didn't seem to change a bit but at the same time he seemed to change so much. He was crazy taller than me now. I was so used to being the taller one! It felt like he had to look down to face me, I wouldn't let him look directly in my eyes or else who knows what they would say. He hugged me and all I could do was stand there. After what feels like forever, I'm face to face with him again.
"Naruto! Welcome back!" Shikamaru exclaimed, slapping him on the back while chewing on his unlit cigarette. He seemed to pick up a thing or two from Asuma-Sensei.
"Shikamaru!" Naruto roared in excitement, hopping to him next, carelessly. I felt like the wind got knocked out of me, but it's not like he held me too tightly or for even more than a few seconds. What the hell is wrong with me?
I pulled my gaze up from my feet, hoping my face wasn't as red as I thought it was but meeting eyes with Lady Tsunade told me my hopes sure as hell weren't given. She still had that smug smirk across her face. I approached her, leaving Shikamaru and Naruto in the door way. I handed her the scroll.
"Thank you, Sakura." She said, kindly. It wasn't like her to be up so early. I heard laughter from down the hall, it sounded familiar as well. "Oh no." She whined, knocking her head back. She looked irritated. "Jiraiya, could you have took any longer?!" She slammed her palms on the desk, standing up in a rage. Gee, I'd hate to be the one she's angry at, even Shikamaru and Naruto looked scared, it broke their conversation.
"C'mon, Tsunade, I got us the sake like you wanted! I just got stopped by a few pretty ladies on the way." He sneered, holding the bottle he mentioned while waving the two shot glasses with a big fat grin, that she just rolled her eyes at.
"A bit early to start drinking, don't you think Pervy-Sage?" Naruto teased, crossing his arms.
"Zip it! Don't you have a girl you should be running off to? You did tell me you were excited to see… what was her name again? I'm getting old." He set down the two glasses on the desk. He noticed me, and smiled. "Say, doesn't she have pink hair…?" He looked at me and a huge grin appeared. He looked to Tsunade with the matching look. What were they talking about? Why did they look at each other like they knew something we all didn't?
"What're you saying!? I'm leaving!" Naruto hollered out in what sounded like embarrassment. Shikamaru followed out after him.
I looked back to Tsunade who was filling her glass. "Maybe Naruto has a point." I joke. She shakes her head.
"I'm the Hokage. I can have a drink if I want. Besides, don't you have some business to take care of?" Her caramel colored eyes rose up to meet my emerald green ones. I couldn't help but notice Master Jiraiya's still-standing grin.
"What might that be? A new mission?" I asked. They begin to basically laugh their guts up. I think the booze is kicking in or maybe they're both just as tired as I am. They clanked their second shot together and tossed it back without making that sour face they did the first time around.
"She's so naïve." Master Jiraiya stated, leaning down to lock eyes with Lady Tsunade. I could sense something between them, I think anybody could. "Naruto was so excited to see you Sakura. Didn't you hear me earlier? The two years we've been gone, all he talked about was you." I felt my heart fall to the pit of my stomach. It was a delightful feeling, at the same time though. I clamped my mouth shut, not sure what to say. I was so choked up, I felt like I'd just make a fool of myself.
"I saw your expression when you first laid eyes on him." She announced, crossing her legs while sliding her green jacket off. Her breasts were exposed and Master Jiraiya sure as hell wasn't looking at me anymore.
"What's your point?" I rose my brow, trying to remain ignorant.
"Go home, sleep, shower and I'll summon you when you're needed. You'll need a clear head for what I have in store for you." I sighed, bowing and quickly escorting myself out. I could see the looks swapped between two of the sannins and it was obvious that Lady Tsunade was eager to spend some time with Master Jiraiya after he's been away for so long.
Chapter 2: The Bottom Line
"That damned woman." I complained, scratching the back of my head. She really called me and Pervy-Sage to her office just so the two can get drunk so early… and on top of that he really had to say that embarrassing thing in front of Sakura-chan. I sighed while beginning to tuck my hands in my pockets. The village hadn't changed one bit. I couldn't help but smile even when no one would smile back at me. I even saw a few dirty looks. I ought' be grateful, it used to be the whole village staring me down now it's down to half the size. It didn't bother me that these people didn't care whether I was dead or alive. It was because I met Iruka-Sensei, Pervy-Sage, Kakashi-Sensei, Sasuke… Ugh. That sure was one thing that could always simmer my positivity down but then I thought of her. The only girl I really ever talked to back then… Sakura-chan. I felt the corner of my mouth rise. That was one way to pump me back up. I can't sit around feeling sorry for myself when I know Sakura-chan counts on me! I bet she's been training real hard these past two years. I can't wait to go on missions with her again and pointlessly ask her out every chance I got. I finally reached my old apartment that I used to hate so much. It was a reminder of how nobody would ever be waiting inside for me. I unlocked the door with my little froggy keychain that matched my wallet and passed the fuck out. It never felt so good to be home.
"You know you look more beautiful every time I see you." He flirted, as if I didn't know he said that to probably fifty girls on his way back. We were 5 shots each deep. I could feel my cheeks beginning to flush but that didn't stop me. It was a slow day in the village after all.
"Jiraiya, when will this end?" I narrowed my almond eyes directly at him, he could hear the sternness in my tone. His dopey expression switched up pretty quickly too. I hated this. He was one way and then he was another all of a sudden.
"Tsunade, what're you talking about?" He asked, acting stupid, downing another shot. I just stared at mine, it was filled to the very top, just like how Jiraiya knew I liked it. I remember back when we were Sakura's and Naruto's age. In fact, I remember that looking at those two was like looking in a mirror it felt like. Jiraiya would steal a bottle of our favorite from his parents and we would sneak off into the woods at night while Sarutobi-Sensei and Orichimaru would be asleep. We would sit and look up at the stars and just talk, train sometimes, but always drink. We could never get Orichimaru to do it, he felt like such a faraway person we could never really get close to I guess that only made the bond between him and I even stronger.
I remember over the years how my opinion changed. I used to think he had a big mouth and nothing to show for it. Compared to Orichimaru, he looked like a complete loser. It wasn't fair of me to make such assumptions. He would be off at Mount Myoboku so much I barely got see him. It wasn't until around that time I started realizing something was up with me. I recall this one night in the woods…
I sat down in the grass, clutching the half empty bottle of sake. I chugged a good amount while leaning back on the oak tree behind me.
"Save some for me, missy." Jiraiya joked, leaning down. Whenever he drank he had this habit of calling me that. He was gawking at me in that weird way he always did when we would get this intoxicated. He sat next to me, but not as close as I would have expected him to. I noticed him keeping to himself a lot more lately. I couldn't help but notice the scratches and bruises scattered across his arms. He must have been training really hard lately. He turned to me with a bewildered look, knocking his head to his shoulder in confusion. "You okay, Tsunade?" I snapped my head aside, pushing my leg out and kicking one knee up. I set my arm on it, crouching over to use it as a head rest. I didn't want him to look at me in the face.
"Yeah." I replied, dully.
"What's up with you lately? You've been giving me the cold shoulder. I mean I've always been getting that but even more so now a days." Jiraiya was a fool but he was well off on picking up emotions, or maybe it was just mine? Because he surely didn't understand any other woman's feelings. I guess he just knew me like the back of his hand and I hated it. "You know… I only started doing these lame missions again was because I missed seeing you." He murmured. I couldn't resist looking back at him, but he was facing the other way, trying to distract himself with drinking. Did he really say that? It didn't come off flirtatious or pushy like every other thing he would say to me. It sounded sincere. It has been awhile since we've been alone like this. We used to do this every night but it's been months. I just sat there in silence, he scoffed, standing up with an attitude. "I should get some sleep, Tsunade." He started to strut off until I got up and pulled him back by the shoulder. I grabbed the bottle from his hand, our faces were nearly inches apart.
"Don't take all of it for yourself, idiot." I hissed, our hands brushed against one another. I never realized how soft his were, or maybe I'm thinking too much? I felt my balance start to wobble, his too. Jiraiya was always such a klutz and this time he was bringing me down with him. He was falling over me, I felt my head hit the ground.
His white hair fell down the sides of his face. I was so close to him. I have never been this close with anybody before. I could see the hurt in his eyes. Did he really mean what he said? I just shrugged it off like I always did. I wanted to turn away, I wanted to run and hide. I always did that with my feelings. Grandad Hashirama wouldn't be happy with me if he knew that.
"Say, Tsunade? Why are you getting all red?" What a fool. I powered my chakra to my palms and pushed his chest hard. Sending him 15 feet back. I got up, looking to the spilled sake bottle. I let my hot-headed anger get me in a lot of trouble. I see Jiraiya lifting himself up, giving the same confused look. I gripped my hands together, forming a fist while kicking the sake bottle into a tree. I watched all the glass shards fall down.
"You act like I didn't miss you either!" I shouted, glaring at him. He stood there in silence. I was getting dizzy, my vision was spinning. The last thing I could remember was Sarutobi-Sensei and Orichimaru coming around because of all the ruckus I made. I wonder if Jiraiya remembers.
"35 years later and you're still trying to get me into bed." I replied, finally taking down my sixth shot. I slung my arm around the back of my chair, crossing my legs. His lips made a straight line. He didn't look happy at all. He adjusted his jacket, before heading towards the door.
"You and I both know, it was never about that." He admitted, quietly. I stood up, heading towards the door to block him. He knew damn well he wasn't going to get past me without a fight. He stood there, looking down at me with somber eyes. Eyes I recognized, eyes I saw that night in the woods.
"Sure. That's why you hit on every woman in hindsight." I bickered.
"It's different with you and them." He declared, instead of how he would always turn away from me when he'd say such things, his eyes were draped on me.
"Oh yeah?" I drawled, sarcastically. "My tits are probably just your favorite." I badgered, pushing past him. He grips my wrist, pulling me with force back against the door. The guards outside the door call out and here the thud.
"Lady Hokage!? Are you okay!?" I felt my heart beating faster by the second. My wrist was pinned over my head.
"Go away, this is an order!" I called out, narrowing my glare up towards Jiraiya.
"You sure, m'lady?" One asked.
"You heard her!" Jiraiya confirmed, aggressively and that was the end of that. "You really think that's why I'm this interested in you? You used to be a flat chested, hot-headed pain in the ass…" His eyes dipped down to our feet. He pressed his forehead against mine, I don't know how he managed to do that considering how much taller he is than me. "I always loved you but you were too stubborn to accept that! I'm still a man…" He finally got fed up and said it. After all these years… I haven't shook like this since I was afraid of blood.
"You should just go…" before I say something stupid. I held onto my arm, feeling all embarrassed.
"This is the time you wanna act all coy?! One minute, it feels like you're into me and then whenever shit gets this tense you just…" He flipped his hair back. "You know what? Never mind."
"I just what?!" I shouted at him, getting madder this time around. I propped up in front of his stupid face, he matched me with the same expression. He was never one to back down.
"You run away from how you feel!" He said it. He said what we both knew. I never thought I'd see the day. I couldn't even hit him or snap like I always felt the need to. Because… he was right. I fall to my knees, feeling so overwhelmed and tired. I've been up all night and this liquor is really getting to me. Did we have to do this now? He ran to me, and picked me up right away. "Are you okay?" He asked softly, sounding concerned. It was something I always adored about him. He could switch just like that, no matter the reason. He always showed he cared.
"You fool…" I whispered, stumbling to get up. He walked me to my chair. He didn't say anything. "Why… me?" I asked, like a timid little child. He could see the pathetic drunken tears clouding up my vision. He smirked, kneeling down. He began playing with my hands fondly.
"Why you, you ask?" He sneered. "Well, I always loved how your hands looked. I would get distracted during training because I would always stare at you when you'd weave hand signs." He rubbed them, gently. I don't know why looking down at him like this made my stomach pump butterflies like crazy. I smiled a bit, I didn't even notice until he looked up and matched me with his. "I love blondes too. Can't you tell?" He chuckled considering his two pupils were blonde. He started to play with the ends of my hair.
"All of it was my appearance?" I whispered, looking to my right. I know I sounded like I was fishing for more kind words, well, because I was… I haven't felt this happy in a long time.
"I like the girls who have that fire in their eyes. Ones that hate to lose…" he paused, "even when they should just walk away from the slot machine." He winked at me, with a stupid grin. I push him away playfully, giggling to myself. Always such an idiot. He tugs my wrist to his heart. I could feel how hard and quickly it sped up just from my touch. "Do you get it now, missy?" I leaned down, pressing my violet diamond to his thick forehead protector. I nodded a little bit. I see why they call liquor liquid courage. He leaned in and pressed his warm lips against mine. I was so surprised, my eyes opened in panic but his were closed. His cheeks were rosy and hot to the touch, it was cute. I reciprocated the tender affection. It was going to turn in this whole big thing until we heard banging on my door.
"Lady Hokage, we have urgent news!" Jiraiya backed away, opening the window holding a finger in front of the same lips that I missed against mine so soon. He did a 'shushing' motion before escorting himself out so I can return to my duties. I felt my head swimming.
Chapter 3: Reunited
I heard loud banging on my door. I looked up to my clock. Shit. Was it already 2 PM?! I ran to my door, in case it was important. I opened it and to be my surprise, it was the last person I expected.
"Naruto!" She fussed, turning her eyes away immediately. "Didn't you bother putting clothes on before answering the door?!" She lectured, still not facing me.
"Haha, sorry Sakura-chan. Hold on." I rushed to get dress. Sakura coming to see me? Am I still sleeping?! Am I dreaming!? This morning she didn't seem to excited to see me. I looked at the necklace Grandma Tsunade gave me so long ago. I always loved the shiny turquoise crystal. I smiled in the mirror before fixing my messy hair the best I could. "So, what're you doing here, Sakura-chan?" I asked, while locking my door. She was wearing tight black shorts, with a whitish-lavender colored overlap. She had a tight red top that looked similar to her old clothes. She wore boots up to her knees which I preferred over her old ninja sandals. Man, she only got prettier as the years passed and I just am the same old Naruto in her eyes. Just wait until she sees my justu! She's going to think I'm so strong, for sure! I caught her smiling at me in the corner of me eye, I felt a sudden rush of excitement and anxiousness. I puckered right up! I'm not the same old Naruto! I'll impress her with my skills.
"Naruto? Are you even listening?" She shook her head like she always did, tightening her headband. I walked beside her down the steps. "Lady Tsunade have summoned us."
Sakura and I sure had a lot to talk about. We caught up and laughed, it felt too good to be true to be back at home. Her pink hair wasn't longer at all, I kind of preferred her short hair anyways. She is one of the few girls to pull it off. She was telling me about her training with Granny Tsunade and I feel little bad for not listening, but I was just so focused on her. I was taking it all in. I haven't been able to hear her voice in so long.
"Say, Sakura-chan," I gulped, fearing the answer. She adverted her eyes to me. "Did you miss me?"
"Go on Hinata" I recognized that voice, I turned to see Kurenai-Sensei pushing… wait is that Hinata!? She had long black hair, and she looks so… so different, It was weird. I haven't seen many people since I got here.
"Hinata?" She wasn't even looking at me, her face was all red and she was fiddling with her finger tips like she always did when she was around me. She sure had some strange tendencies.
"Naruto-kun… It's been so long. How are you?" She asked, in her sweet delicate voice. Sakura stood next to me, saying nothing. She didn't have a happy look on her face either.
"Hinata, I hardly recognized you!" I chuckled, scratching the back of my hair. Sakura rolled her eyes, turning around heading to the door since we were standing in front of the Hokage Residence.
"I'll tell Lady Tsunade you were late because you were flirting." She called down at me, with her back facing our direction. She sure sounded cold.
"Flirting?" I questioned. I know if I don't get my ass up there I will get an ear full from Granny and probably Sakura too. "Anyway, I gotta get going! Nice seeing you, Hinata!" She smiled at me before I darted off.
"Where he is?" Lady Tsunade groaned, with bags under eyes. She was sipping dark coffee while massaging her temples. I guess getting drunk at 7 AM takes a toll on someone, especially when you're that age.
"Flirting with Hinata." I replied, she set her mug down. She simpered, looking pleased.
"You sound jealous." She chirped, sounding happy I did.
"Don't say such nonsense." I tossed my eyes away.
"Sorry I'm late!" Naruto bursts in, just in the nick of time like he always did. I think I ought' to be grateful. I crossed my arms, waiting for our orders to be directed.
"Just hardly." She added, straightening out paper work. "I presume you guys got a good rest?" I wish. I was tossing and turning pretty much the whole time. Naruto nods his head.
"I forgot how comfy my bed was!" he commented with a big fat grin. "So a new mission!? I can't wait to show you my stuff Sakura-chan!"
"Don't be so hasty." Lady Tsunade interrupts. A rush of wind comes through the room, I couldn't see a thing but suddenly as I regain my vision I see Master Jiraiya leaning on Lady Tsunade's chair with a similar grin that Naruto was wearing. "Just in time." She sneered, licking her lips before taking another sip of her coffee. He dropped a few sugar cubes in the steamy liquid.
"I'd hate to keep you waiting." He patted her head fondly before walking towards Naruto. He slung his arm around his neck, they started shoving playfully. They sure are close. It gave me a warm feeling to see Naruto close with someone like that. I knew he never had parents growing up, how alone he must've felt. I can't believe I thought your behavior and character mattered on if you had parents or not… I was such a foolish girl.
"Sakura, you and I will be going out tonight. Alone. Clear your schedule." She told me. She was my master but the only alone time we really spent together was during training. It wasn't a typical thing to be asked out like this.
"Yes ma'am."
"Jiraiya will deal with you." She winked at them before sending them off.
I walked to the place Lady Tsunade wanted me to be at. It was only 8 PM but the place was packed. Lady Tsunade built a casino in the village and it became a happening spot. I've never been inside considering my age so you should know I am pretty excited. Alone time with my master too! Without my body worked to death made it even better. I always looked up to Lady Tsunade, I hope one day I could be as significant and wise as her.
"Sakura!" Her raspy voice called out from a few feet down the street. She waved with excitement, she sure seemed lively.
"M'lady." I replied, with a warm welcoming smile.
"Shall we?" She escorted me up the stairs. The guys up front greeted her with fondness. Everyone always looked so happy to see her. They gave me a judgmental look. "She's with me." She insisted as I followed behind her. The place was packed with smoke and colorful slot machine's ringing.
We sat at slot machines, she bought a pack of smokes and a few drinks. She always looked like she had the most fun when she was gambling. I sat there, just watching her lose. It was actually kind of funny. She ended up getting fed up, punching the machine to shambles with her fury. We went to the private Hokage room in the back. It had velvet colored carpet and a comfortable couch. Two steaks with a bed of greens were placed at a kotatsu. It sure looked fancy back here. The room was dimly lit and the walls were a royal red tint. It was a relaxing environment.
"I never knew what bad luck you had." I giggled before sitting down before our meal. She had a sour expression which faded into a pleasant disposition.
"They didn't call me the Legendary Sucker for nothing." She snickered, before digging in. "You know, Sakura, you remind me a lot of myself." I felt my cheeks blush, I always loved when she compared us to one another. She was the one person I wanted to emulate. Everyone in the village was jealous that I got to be the Hokage's pupil. I felt blessed. "Over the years, you've become wiser. Stronger. More confident." She actually noticed? I felt lucky to be out to dinner with her and to get such praise. "I wanted to tell you something… I never had any kids but I see you, um… as a daughter if you will…" She looked up at me, I think she could see the tears in my waterline built up. She simpered. "One thing we aren't alike in is crying though." She wiped my tears away with her cherry red colored finger tips.
"I'm just… thank you, Lady Tsunade." I bowed the best I could sitting down. She patted my head. I couldn't feel any happier. She actually sees me like a daughter. Tears of sorrow or joy, they always came quick with me.
"Now listen." Her tone flipped. A waitress knocked on the door right after she said that. She called them in. She had a tray of two shot glasses and the exact bottle Master Jiraiya had earlier. She's drinking again? Gez… "Thank you." The waitress bowed before being on her way. She gave me the same look I was greeted at the door with. I didn't look old enough to drink so I guess it can't be helped. Why was there two shot glasses?
"Is there someone else joining us?" I questioned. She saw me looking down to the sake, she chuckled while pouring it to the top.
"Nope." She slid one of the glasses in my direction. I looked up to her in surprise. "I won't tell if you won't." she had a goofy grin across her young face. Her lips were so pink and glossed. It was impossible to say no to her. I never drank before but I was curious about how it made you feel. "Cheers." She held hers up, we clinked them together both downing it simultaneously. It sure tasted bitter, but she took it down like a champ.
"I never imagined it to be so disgusting. You drink this a lot?" I asked, nearly gagging. She couldn't help but laugh at me.
"Oh, Sakura." She held her stomach while chuckling, "Liquor doesn't usually taste good, but the feeling makes up for it. Shit… it sure helped today." I could see the corner of her lips rise up. She looked genuinely happy.
"You wouldn't have said that earlier. I saw how hungover you were." I commented, cutting my steak. She nodded in agreement.
"I was hungover but it gave me some strength." What was she talking about? "You know Jiraiya has been fawning over me since our academy days?" I could've guessed that, but I know Jiraiya isn't called Pervy-Sage for nothing. "Much like how Naruto is with you." Naruto? Why is she bringing him up? "I didn't take him seriously. I don't know why I assumed he was just trying to get on my nerves, I mean… well I know." She poured another shot for the two of us. I could still feel the burn down my throat to the pit of my stomach. I didn't really want to drink more but I didn't want to disappoint my master. "Anyways," She slid her emerald green jacket off, smiling up at me with red cheeks. "Today I finally sorted out my feelings for him." I was surprised! She never talked about things so personal, not even with Shizune. I felt honored.
"That's great, m'lady!" I exclaimed in astonishment. She was never a touchy-feely woman. I was glad to see her softer side. We both threw our shot back that same dreadful after taste sure made me make a sour face which would always amuse Lady Tsunade. "I knew I sensed something with you and Master Jiraiya." I pointed out with encouragement. I could see her get all embarrassed and shy once I said that.
"No way! Really? We're that easy to read?!" She shook her head in dismay but I could see a little joy behind her coyness.
"So you sorted your feelings, you say? You mean…?"
"I mean that I wasted 35 years avoiding how I really felt over petty things." Her tone switched up again. She sounded stern, like there was more to this meeting than her telling me about her and Master Jiraiya. Crossing her arms, it felt like she was staring into my soul. Her long blond locks framing the sides of her face swayed back and forth as she shook her head for some reason. "You are a lot like me." She paused, placing a cigarette between her lush pink lips. She lit it with the candle on the kotatsu. She took a long drag before carrying on, blowing the smoke to the side so it wouldn't drift in my face. "I don't want you making the same mistake." She avowed in all seriousness. I sat there quietly. What was she talking about? I stared at her blankly. Was she waiting for my reply? I wasn't sure what to say. I could feel my face grow hotter and a bit of warmness in my mind. Was this the sake?
"What do you mean?" I asked, feeling a little more confident in myself for some reason. What a weird sudden change.
"I mean." She stopped, taking another shot. For some reason I wanted another one too despite it's horrid taste it did make me feel different and I was starting to feel it more and more as the clock ticked. She smirked as she saw me filling up my glass. "Wow. To the very top?" She rested her arm out behind her with the lit smoke in between her pale, thin fingers. "You're like me so much, it's scary."
"Cheers to you and Master Jiraiya!" I chirped, feeling so happy out of nowhere. I'm glad the first person I drank with was my master. The Hokage of the Hidden Leaf Village. I felt honored knowing her like this. We toasted and drank more.
"Not so fast! Trying to distract me, eh?" She sure had a discerning eye. I giggled forgetting what she was even talking about to be honest. "You don't still love Sasuke do you?" She asked.
I hated whenever somebody brought him up. The fact I ever said I loved him makes me skin crawl. I was so dumb for thinking I could fix him, that I could save him. All he cares about his power and revenge… he has so much darkness in him. My perspective of him changed after being away from him for so long. I was so distracted by his looks that it clouded my judgement. I lowered my head. Even though I didn't love him like that he was still my team mate. We've been through a lot together, but I certainly didn't think of him like that anymore. Don't really know why I deluded myself in the first place, it caused a whole lot of unnecessary heartache.
"I never loved him, I was delusional." I replied, sounding like a total bummer.
"Never thought I'd see the day." She sounded impressed. "How do you know you don't love him?" What a bizarre question… I tried to find that answer myself but all that shot across my mind was Naruto. How warm I felt in his company, how I smiled so easily with him, we could talk about anything and I know he wouldn't judge me one bit. I don't' know what love is but it sure feels like maybe something like that when I'm with him. Ugh! What am I saying!? This booze sure makes me think some twisted things… then I remembered Lady Tsunade's words.
"I mean that I wasted 35 years avoiding how I really felt over petty things."
"I just… I know now that back then that wasn't love." I tried to keep it simple.
"You've really grown up. I know we don't talk about personal things like this often but I notice a lot. You look at Naruto the way I look at Jiraiya." Oh no. I felt my heart drop in half a second. I think she could read that in my face. "Don't worry. It's only obvious to Jiraiya and I." I felt a little relief but still… "I had to be sure that your feelings for Sasuke were non-existent."
"Why?"
"With Sasuke clouding your mind it would only make it easier for you to ignore your feelings for Naruto, but now I see that we narrowed it down. You mustn't run away from your feelings." She cautioned in a demanding tone.
"But m'lady…" I drifted off.
But what, Sakura?!" She hollered, slamming her shot glass down in a fit. She was more short-tempered than me gez… "You have a shot at happiness that I wish I had! I messed it up but fate is giving me another chance with Jiraiya… I wish I could've started over at 16 but this is reality… and I'm telling you this because I care." She sure had an aggressive way of comforting a person but I was grateful. "You and I are alike, but I hope not in this way. I wanted to give you a piece of advice." She dragged my shot glass back to her, pouring more til it filled to the tip-top. She leaned on her palm with her elbow on the table. She smiled, pushing it my way while holding hers up. "A true kunoichi doesn't run or hide under any kind of circumstance. Including her emotions. You'll regret it, if you don't. I know you were jealous of him and Hinata, that was evident. You need to work fast or he'll end up pitied by her into marriage and the person who was always there for you will be busy with his wife and children. Just picture it and let that resonate within you… Can you deal with that? So my advice to you is… take my advice damn it! Every single drop of it. I wish someone told me this 35 years ago but I have a once in a lifetime chance to make up for my mistakes and maybe save you from making the same ones." She downed the last of the sake as I followed after her, doing the same. I can't believe we crushed this bottle, I can't even remember how long we've been here. It feels like forever.
Chapter 4: Heaven & Earth
"Finally!" I hollered out, glaring him down.
"Give me a break. I got our favorite!" He pulled apart an orange popsicle with a beaming grin. I guess I could forgive him just this once. I sucked on the delicious treat as we walked through a peaceful part of the village. "So, was your first day back as eventful as you hoped it would be?" Pervy-Sage asked, looking up into the dark sky, the blanket of stars were hypnotizing. I sighed.
"I mean… I loved when you took me to Ichiraku Ramen Shop! I sure missed that…but I mainly slept."
"I know you missed a lot of things, like that pretty girl with the pink hair!" He teased, nudging me playfully. The sweet treat dripped down to the pavement. I stared down at my feet. He was still walking, he turned back with it in his mouth, half way gone already.
"She didn't seem to miss me." I groaned, feeling pathetic.
"Don't say that." He encouraged, patting my head. "She doesn't seem like the kind of girl to be open with her feelings." I wish I could believe that. Team 7 it was always "Sasuke-kun!" I really wish I could trick myself into believing that. I knew Sakura too well though. "I know you're probably thinking about how she used to be, but people change, people grow. It's insulting of you to think she remained the same." It's like the old man read my mind! I sighed, kicking the dirt as I pouted. He had a point. Sakura did seem a bit different. Besides her clothes that is. She seemed to be more collected and mature. She didn't even mention Sasuke either…
"Thanks Pervy-Sage…" I was getting lost in my thoughts. Maybe I was over reacting? I should just be happy to be around her again, and I really was. I didn't care if there was ever a chance of her returning my feelings. Her friendship was more than enough for me. I sat on the bench where I transformed into Sasuke at. I remember how close I was to kissing her… Man, that almost was the best day of my life. I swung my head back. I heard voices off in the distant.
"If it isn't the Hokage, herself!" Jiraiya hollered out in a sing-song voice. "Look who's with her too." He leaned down, whispering in my ear, nudging me with a devious smirk. I turned to see, it was dark out but I would notice her anywhere, anytime. They approached us, but they were stumbling. Is Sakura-chan injured?!
"Don't refer to me as that, it's unsettling." She demanded, not even acknowledging me.
"Are you okay Sakura-chan?! I saw you stumbling!" I ran to her aid, she put one hand on my shoulder. She smirked at me in this brand new way. I felt the blood rush to my head as I stared deeply in her emerald eyes.
"Oh hey Naruto, we were just talking about you." She slurred. Wait what did she just say? Hold on… I recognize that smell… Pervy-Sage always comes back to the room smelling like it… I turned to Granny Hokage with a dirty look but she was off walking with Pervy-Sage already, wait a minute… is his arm around her?! What!? What the hell is going on!? I looked back and Sakura was just gawking at me like she's never seen me before. She traced her fingers over my cheeks, I could feel my them heat up from her touch. "I always liked your whiskers." She whispered, as her eyes followed the movement of her soft fingertips. She was acting weird.
"Are you drunk, Sakura-chan?" I dared to ask, guiding her to the bench.
"How'd you know!?" She replied with excitement. Well, there's my answer. I smack my forehead, so much for being a responsible Hokage, Granny… I looked back over to Sakura and I swear her gaze hasn't left me for a moment. It made me feel kind of shy, only her…
"I'll take you home." She walked close to me, I'd be lying if I said I didn't like it but I knew she was just intoxicated.
Chapter 5: Truth be told
I waited outside for Lady Tsunade. I had a lot to think about. I watched all these teenagers and kids running around, some playing ninja, some holding hands. I had this overwhelming feeling to do that with someone… but not with just anybody... with fucking Naruto!? Really, brain?! I guess I just can't give it a rest. I saw the stars lurking in the dark ocean that is the sky. I felt at peace. I sighed, I guess there was no denying it anymore, especially after the talk Lady Tsunade and I had together.
I've lied to myself for so long. I started feeling so conflicted after the chunnin exams. Naruto's support helped me push Ino out of my body. I saw him win against Neji… but my head was so focused on Sasuke that I couldn't show him the appreciation he deserves. I feel so foolish.
"A true kunoichi doesn't run or hide under any kind of circumstance."
Those words hit a nerve. She's right. She's always right. I hate to admit it but seeing Hinata approach Naruto like that annoyed me. I didn't want her talking to MY best friend... my teammate… mine… I knew Naruto is totally oblivious to her feelings and he isn't the type of guy to flirt, well not with just anybody at least. Remembering that simple fact warmed my heart. He was such a reliable, respectful person to me. He said stupid things a lot but he always protected me, supported me, cheered me on, always believed in me… That's more than I can say about Sasuke, but I didn't care. All I seemed to think about was that blond hair fox. Would I be okay with him marrying another woman? I never thought I'd miss him bugging me for dates but just the image of him with some other girl, caring about her more than me… it pisses me off!
"You ready, Sakura?" I didn't even notice Lady Tsunade standing before me. I nodded as we strolled down the deserted road. The wind and leaves danced with one another, this sake sure was keeping me warm.
"So, did you think about what we discussed?" She brought up, lighting up a smoke. She cuffed the end of it to block of the breeze. I took the time to stare up at the tantalizing sky, the streets were lit up by the moon and stars. It was a lovely sight.
"I did."
"So, what will you do?" She asked, tucking her pack into her bra.
"Well if it isn't the Hokage herself!" Was that Master Jiraiya? I couldn't see in the dark too well but I saw that spikey blondie sitting beside him. I felt my heart beat faster, I don't know if I was more nervous or enthralled? Every time I've seen him lately I can't stop the thumping in my chest.
"Don't' refer to me as that, it's unsettling." She puts out her smoke, lifting her leg upwards to ash it on the bottom of her heels.
"Are you okay, Sakura-chan!? I saw you stumbling!" Naruto rushed to me, his concerned baby blue eyes meeting with mine. My eyes were pretty but compared to his, they looked like coal. Seeing his face again, after so long is making me feel some type of way. After that talk with Lady Tsunade I could feel myself starting to want more. I didn't want to run this time. Was this Sakura or the sake talking? I didn't really care either way because this feeling is like no other. It's not something you find every day. I loved how wary he got over me.
"Oh hey Naruto! We were just talking about you!" He gave me a peculiar look. He seemed shocked. I had one hand on his shoulder, I was leaning on him. He was so warm, mmm I never wanted to let go. Master Jiraiya and Lady Tsunade didn't say any farewells, those love birds were off in a hurry. I looked up at that angel face. It was weird seeing him in this blurred vision, I didn't even think about anything I was saying or doing. I touched his soft skin, he had those cute whiskers that he told me he hated so long ago… I never had it in me to tell him how much I actually adored them. "I always liked your whiskers." I whispered, not taking my eyes off them for a second.
"Are you drunk, Sakura-chan?" He led me to the bench, he gazed at me as if it was an unusual thing.
"How'd you know!?" I gushed with a girlish tone. He always knew when something was up with me, I loved that he knew me down to my core. I felt special when I was with him. He actually accepted me for me. For all my flaws, for my big forehead, for my flat chest… he wanted to take me out on dates… all he wanted was my attention and I abused that. Was it too late?
"I'll take you home." He insisted, sounding not too happy. As we walked side by side, I noticed myself absent-mindedly walking near him. I wanted to feel more of his sunshiny warmth.
"Aren't Lady Tsunade and Master Jiraiya really cute?" I asked, turning to face Naruto.
"Wait! So are they an item or something now? Did you see them being all close and touchy when they were leaving or was I just seeing things?" He was always so oblivious when it came to romance.
"Yes! But shush," I put my finger to his lips. He leaned back on this wooden fence. I made him stop. "Don't go around saying anything." I demanded in the sweetest way possible, as I used my other hand to grip his shoulder.
"You sure are acting weird tonight, Sakura-chan…" Naruto had a puzzled look across his adorable face.
"I am?" I could hear my words slurring.
"You're being so… nice to me. Nicer than you ever have before." He paused, and smiled. "Oh yeah, Granny got you drunk! Remind me to give her a piece of my mind later…" I felt a bit offended, I yanked at his wrist because he tried to get away back to walking, carelessly. His eyes widened, I tried to keep a serious disposition.
"I'm not being nice to you just because I had a bit to drink." I claimed, sternly.
"Sure…" He whispered along with the breeze, hesitantly. I leaned my head into his chest. I keep forgetting how tall he's gotten.
"Naruto listen to me…" I bit my lip, he stood there quietly, waiting for my words.
"Are you alright, Sakura-chan? Look at me?" My heart melts every time I hear him refer to me like that… he never addresses anyone else that way. It made it feel so personal.
"I can't tell you what I want to tell you… if you're looking directly at me." I whispered. I felt the breeze brush against my arms and run through my hair. Naruto stood patiently, I could feel him shake. "I never answered you earlier when you asked if I missed you." I could feel his heart upstart, going a million miles per hour. I touched over his heart, his broad chest was hard under my palm. I could tell he got so nervous around me. It made it easier to confess when he acted this cute. "These past two years made me realize a lot of things… missing you more than I can bare... I couldn't be honest with myself earlier but after Lady Tsunade told me what happened with her and Master Jiraiya I knew I couldn't keep this to myself any longer…" I pulled away, clutching onto his white shirt with the Uzumaki symbol in the middle of it. Hopefully I'll be wearing this someday…
"What happened with her and Pervy-Sage?" Naruto asks, trying to get a good look at my face.
"She didn't want to face her feelings for him because of trivial reasons. She didn't want me making the same mistake…" The look on his face was priceless. It was to die for. I don't know exactly what his expression revealed. I thought the world was spinning.
"S-Sakura-chan… what're you saying?" he was damn near speechless. I tip toed up and pressed my lips against his. I finally just said fuck it. They were just as soft and warm as I knew they'd be. Naruto kissed me back, I'm sure he was so confused but he didn't fight me. He kissed harder in fact.
"I can't let Hinata take you away from me." I avowed, meeting his eyes with a confident smile. His face was bright red, but it only made him cuter.
"Hinata?" he questioned.
"She has a thing for you but it's too bad you like pink-haired girls." I boasted, flipping my hair back only to have the wind push it in my face again. Naruto's expression faded from shock to a look I've yet to see before. It was hard to explain but his eyes were smiling at me, he was glowing.
"Are you being for real, Sakura-chan? What about Sasuke?" The subject I've been dreading has come to its arrival.
"About that…" I reached for Naruto's hand. It was so big and manly, it made my mine look like a child's. His touch was war and his hands so soft, surprisingly. I guided him to sit down, he leaned against the fence as I held his hand tightly. I leaned my head on his shoulder. I was getting sleepy and this sake sure was contributing to it. "I thought I loved him… I was only 13, I didn't know a thing about him until he left the village. I learned that the hard way… but even when I was with Sasuke, I felt like a fan girl. It took you two being gone for me to notice that wasn't love. Love is someone who makes you feel important, wanted. Love is that warm feeling you get in your heart just by looking at them. You gave me confidence in so many ways, Naruto. You actually treated me as an equal." I could feel him holding my hand tighter. It made me feel relaxed.
"You don't love Sasuke…?" I could hear the utter disbelief in his tone.
"I care for him as a comrade but I would only use the word 'love' for… well… you, Naruto." I looked up, he just stared at me intently. Did I make my feelings clear enough, Lady Tsunade?