For some reason he got used to visiting this place at least once a week. Maybe it was nostalgia. He was sitting in the corner of the bar, observing how the white boam of his beer slowly disappeared and sinking in melancholy. They were weird, sad evenings. Lonely. There were more people in the pub, mostly regulars . He recognized them after some time. Leaning on each other and speaking quietly , afraid to be overheard, because in these dark times they had to mind their own tongue, or they might loose it. Or loose their freedom.
He couldn't get used to it. It wasn't a long time since the world broke down. It was almost scary – just a few years and their whole world was teared apart. First, they took his home, called him an anachronism, just a part of German Empire. His people were slowly disappearing and the only thing left was the east side of Germany, surrounded by concrete wall and guarded by soldiers. How could this have happend?
„You are still visiting this place...?" said softly someone behind him.
He raised his head in surprise and turned so sharply that he almost fell from his barstool. There was a lovely woman behind him, long brown hair carelessly tied in a loose bun. Dispite the bleak autumn, she wore a knee-long skirt, partly covered by a coat.
„Eliz," he addressed her with surprise . And for the first time today he smiled.
Her lips curled into a hesitant smile. The one he rememberd and which he liked so much. She brushed her palm against his cheek and kissed him on the other. Gilbert nodded to the barman to order a drink for her when she sat down. He watched? her until she took a sip. When she looked at him again, he grinned.
„What brought you to my town?" he asked haughtily. „Did you miss me? Did you finally recognized what you miss in your life?"
She kept smilling, too much used to his talking, so it couldn't disturb her. It was nice to hear it again. „Duties, what else?" she answered his first question.
For a few minutes, they were sitting in silence . After not seeing each other for so long they didn't know what to say. She didn't expect to find him here. She came just because of nostalgia. She remembered some wild pareties they celebrated here. Then, when the world was still? normal. Gilbert once arranged a birthday party for Ludwig here. And she came with Roderich to wish the honoree. They returned here many times over and each time was unforgettable.
„How are you doing?" she asked carelessly, but he didn't miss real care in her voice. She knew his answer before he spoke, because they were all the same.
„I'm still alive, so I have nothing to complain about," he shrugged with feigned disinterest.
„Sometimes I don't believe that it's the victory," she confessed quietly and sipped from her drink again.
He looked at her and noticed the long scar under her jaw. He would swear that it was't there before and he knew how she came to it. She saw his gaze when she turned to him, and smiled lightly. Her fingers touched the white line softly just under the edge of her jaw.
„ Those were the times..." she winked at him with pride in her voice.
She was proud of that year. The revolution was drowned in blood, but she loved just the feeling of her people uprising. She still had the flag with the circle cutout at home. A symbol of the defiance.
„Yeah, there was a disarray because of you," he laughed loudly. A few men in the pub turned around.
That laugh broke the ice between them, neither of them knew existed. After a while they were both laughing not caring about the rest of the pub, which ignored them anyway. Other people acted like they're deaf. Laughter was dangerous. It draw too much attention. If someone had enough energy for laughing, he had enough energy for troubles.
Eliza and Gilbert weren't afraid that someone will notice the absurdity of their talk. Theyeven discussed the long lost past or their shared childhood, when they constantly provoked each other. They knew that no one would understand them.
When the inkeeper started to cough signitificantly, they realized that it's late and they should take their leave. He held the door for her and they went out into the cold autumn night together. She pulled her coat closer around herself and took Gilbert's arm.
The sleeping city was silent and dark. In the night it was impossible to see how gray it is in reality. Without the sun even the little colors faded away and the light of lanterns flooded everything equally with the eerie orange accents. But the peace in this nighttime was magical. Gilbert rarely wandered out so late and when he did, he wasn't exactly in the condition to perceive something.
„Are you seeing Ludwig?" Elizaveta asked abruptly.
„No," he answerd. „ When they want to negotiate, they never even let us spare a few words with each other . I saw him, but I hadn't chance to talk with him."
Eliza nodded with understanding, watching the pavement under her feet intently. She suspected that they didn't see each other, but still - she had to ask. Maybe it was hope. Hope that if Ludwig and Gilberd has some contact, maybe she can have some with Roderich.
He didn't recognize where they were heading, until the solid concrete wall appeared before them. It bordered the street like the wall of a house. But there were no windows and no end to it. He automatically stopped. Elizaveta did a few more steps until their hooked arms stopped her too. She raised her gaze and saw the monster, which intersected the city like a gray scar and divided it.
Clinging to him more tightly, she suddenly felt like the cold intesified. Gilbert looked at her and saw the hopelessness on her face again. He knew her like a cheerfull girl, smiling and caring. During this evening he saw her darker side too many times, sad and pensive.
In the desire to do something to cheer her up, he let her stand alone and jogged away to the nearest small park. He reached over the low metal fence for something and before she could recognize what is he doing, he rushed back to her, holding a rose in his fingers. It was withered and colorless, though it was possibly red before. Like every flower here, all trying to glorify the goverment which was trying to choke them.
But id didn't matter now. It was just a flower. Without hesitation he shoved it behind her ear and assessed his work critically.
„That's better," he nodded, satisfied with himself.
She laughed and made sure that the flower holds in its place well. The time when she was tangling flowers in her hair seemed so long ago.
„That's how I remember you," he complimented her new look.
„It's been a long time," she replied with smile.
„Not so long," he huffed. „Last time I wanted to do this was back in Vienna. But you had your eyes just for Roderich.
„And you weren't able to take action."
„Even more so! What would I do with you?"
She rised her brows.
„Don't look at me like this! You match so much better with Roderich."
„Really?"
„I really couldn't start anything with someone whom I thought to be a guy for half of my life."
Her cheeks turned bright red. „ That was like a kick in the nether regions!"
„Fortunately for you, it doesn't hurt as much as it would have had if you were a real man."
She frowned at him and glared so hard that he had to laugh.
„But if there was something good about these ballroom dances, it was you. At least there was something to feast your eyes on, when you and Roderich danced."
He straightened stiffly, raised his arms like holding a dance partner, and in excessively fast pace he circled her in a motion of dance. She laughed, althought the memories hurt. „The good old times in Vienna," she said.
He grined and pull her closer. She didn't know what he's doing, but when he sneaked an arm around her waist, she understood quickly. She grabbed his shoulder while her other arm was stretched out and hooked in his hand. In the moment they started dancing, she began to hum the melody one of the Viennese waltz. She knew these melodies by heart, and although they were beautiful she prefered other compositions. Those, which Roderich had played late at night, when the house was empty.
Sometimes she stayed hidden in the darkness of the hall and just listened. Othertime, she joined him in the room. When he thought he's alone and no one can hear him, new tones appeared in his music. She listened to him playing with the keybords and didn't care about the rules. When he played for her...
She rested her head against Gilbert's shoulder and their dance slowed to rhythmic swaying.
„I miss him," she whispered.
They lowered their arms and hugged each other. both were grateful to have the opportunity to spend some time together. In this weird world they felt abandoned and isolated. And the high wall just a few steps from them was the answer why they felt so.
„Do you think that it will ever end?" she asked. The sadness had already left her voice. There was just calmness and pure curiosity.
„I don't know, Lizy, I just hope," he answered and kissed her hair. Nothing romantic, just a loving gesture to someone he cared for.
Somewhere far away the church bells stroke midnight. One long gloomy day turned into another, November the 17th, 1988.