"You know they say there's no such thing as what it might've been? I've been thinking about that an awful lot lately. There really is such a thing as what it might've been. If there wasn't, my ass would be rotting in a heap, and so would yours. And you know it." I said, trying to avoid eye contact. It felt like forever since I'd been able to look into her eyes. I tried not to take advantage of that, either. So much had changed. I wasn't sure how this conversation would end.
"You're right. I guess I owe you that much. What're you doing these days? Doesn't look like you've changed much," She eyed my black, black and blacker wardrobe. She was right, I hadn't changed much.
"College student. I share a flat with Iggy and his girlfriend Michelle. How about you? How's your life been since 'us' crashed and burned?"
"I spent a few years running. Running alone is alwful, you know. I almost killed myself. I had an interesting run through rehab. And now I'm here," she gestured around her. I looked around her apartment, which looked like some sort of Martha Stuart catalog crammed into a small bedroom. I mentally compared it too my room; black, black and jam-packed with CD's.
"Max, I need to tell you something. I need you to listen to me. And don't ask questions."
"Sure Fang, I'd always thought that was what 'us' had been about. Young love and never looking back."
"You did look back,'' I said flatly. "We did. We broke up because we looked back."
"Fang, I… I … I love you. I really do. I always have. But I'm thinking of another saying right now, one that I think sums up our relationship well. "
"Which is?"
"What doesn't kill us is making us stronger. Fang, that stuff was years ago. Five years ago we didn't know how we felt about each other. I didn't think we'd ever be more than friends."
"I didn't either. I'd always thought of you as the rock, the one everyone leaned on, the shoulder to cry on. But then… you opened up. I realized even you need a shoulder to cry on. And then… I realized you were just as human as I'd been." Now that the deep, mushy stuff was out in the open, I could let the real me show through a little more. "All 98."
"Thanks, Fang." She seemed to grasp the humor now. "I know I can count on you to remind me I'm a freak." But she wasn't offended. She was totally okay with it all being how it was.
"My freak." I muttered.