So, this is my first fanfiction ever, because I`m pretty unsure about how to write characters that existed in other people's mind. So, I have really no idea if this is any good and if I can just Prim in any way... I hope so, but I'm really not sure and I reeeally wish you guys like it nonetheless.
And btw, english is not my first language, so I hope I don't make too many mistakes and that it's still readable 3
Stroking the cats fur, I sit on the comfortable couch in the living room. It's quite impressive that we even have a living room and I'm still not sure if I will ever get used to it. I actually liked the old house, the one we were living in before Katniss won the 74th Hunger Games. I know that it was seated in the Seam and pretty broken-down, not really a good place to live in, but I lived my whole life there. When I was little, my father had woken me up, he had taken me to places I would never go by myself. Shortly said: It's the place where I had my dad.
But that's in the past. To be exact it's already been three years since we moved to the Victor's Village. Three whole years living without a single worry. Well, at least we could live without worry. But we don't. My mum is sometimes still depressed and just hides in her own room, Katniss is restless and very unhappy. I don't know how to help. The only thing I can do to make her feel better is talk to her, be with her, try to cheer her up. But it never quite works. She isn't her old self, she is nowhere near the old Katniss Everdeen. These days she isn't the girl who was on fire. It's not that she is hiding in her room, like mum. She's just out, out in the woods with Gale, hunting, trying to be normal, trying to get her old life back. Trying to forget the Games ever happened. But she never does. I can hear it when she sleeps. Screaming, kicking and waking up with tears in her eyes. She never admits it. Refuses to talk about it. I know I'm not a shrink, but that's not what she needs anyway. She needs family, she needs to know that we love her but she won't let us. I'm worried sick and I hate it to feel so powerless. I just want to help my big sister but how can I do that if she refuses to admit that she needs help?
Buttercup hisses and I sit straight up, trying to shake off these sad thoughts and look out of the window, because someone was knocking on them. It's still raining outside. Pouring like there is no tomorrow and I hardly see the figure that is standing outside because it's very dark outside and the person is mostly dressed in black. Buttercup jumps off from my lap and I sigh, stand up and walk to the window, after I looked harder. Yup. It's who I thought it was. Opening a door, I force a smile on my face, because I'm not in the mood for stupid jokes and lame tries to cheer me up. I know he tries hard to make me feel better and I really appreciate that, but today is not a good day. It's reaping day.
"Well, aren't you dressed up pretty?", asks the boy with the brownish hair and dark grey eyes who's standing all soaked on the sidewalk. He doesn't ask if he can come in. He's just standing there in the rain, about to catch a cold. For about a minute I just stare at him and then go to the side so that he can come in.
Rory Hawthorne has a very confident walk. It seems like he thinks he owns the world. It's pretty unnerving but as a close friend I'm very much used to it so that I don't roll my eyes at his arrogant behavior. At least I know that he tries to survive by deceiving his hunters. There are a lot of people that don't like the second oldest Hawthorne kid. As for me? I like him. Like, a lot. I know I shouldn't. He's no good for me, we don't have a single thing in common, but weirdly we have so much we can talk about. Sometimes it's scary when were sitting in our garden, talking for hours, forgetting what time it is just to realize that it's well past midnight and we should be in bed. He makes me laugh. Even if I don't want to. He makes me feel comfortable and safe, although I know we're constantly watched and regarded as threats.
"Could say the same about you. Got your best clothes out of the closet?" A teeny tiny smile hushes over my lips before it disappears again and I close the door behind Rory. I don't have to pretend like everything is fine, because Rory is one of the few people that know that nothing is fine. Nothing at all. But it helps to joke around. At least a little bit. I'm still worried about later. I know my name is only three times in there. But three years ago it was only in there once and it was picked. So ever since that I'm pretty shaky at the day of the Reaping. Because the odds are not really in my favor.
Rory seats himself on the couch, well, more slouching than really sitting and upsets Buttercup who hisses again and leaves his place on the comfy couch to go to his basket. Ever since we live in this big house Buttercup is very picky and always finds something he doesn't like. I don't know what's up with him. Maybe the whole being rich thing got to his head.
Anyway, I sit myself beside Rory, try to look as calm as possible and let out a tiny sigh. I know that he is looking at me, I can see it out of my periphery vision, I know his grey as that are so usual in District 12 try to see through my eyes, through everything into my soul. He does that a lot. He has such a good knowledge of human nature. In front of him you can't pretend, because it never works. At least not with me. He knows when I'm lying it's insane. Most of the time I think that he knows me better than I do and that is pretty scary but than again it's also comforting. Having someone that gets you out of trouble (not that I'm in trouble on a daily basis), someone that can help you fix your problems, someone who likes you with all your faults. I know that people think I'm this perfect little girl. Helping my mum with the wounded, helping out the poor people in the Seam. Some even say I'm like an angel. With my blonde hair and the blue eyes. And I don't say that I'm really a bad person. I'm not, I know that because I couldn't hurt anyone. Not on purpose at least. "One squirrel for your thoughts.", says Rory with a little smile on his face. He looks like he is at home and I guess this really feels like home to him.
"It's nothing... Just..." I shrug my shoulders, not sure about what to say. I don't wanna share my thoughts with him, not today. It would be best if I could crawl back into my bed and hide out from the Reaping. I hate this feeling. Having to fear something you know you can't do anything about. If I am reaped again, I'm dead. Katniss can't volunteer for me. I know a lot of people like me, but no friendship goes that far. I wouldn't do it, because the chances of winning are slim. Almost non existent. Katniss is something entirely different. She is strong, she knows what she wants, she fought until the end. And although she is the strongest person I've ever known, the Games broke her. They made a new person out of her and I hate it. I hate all of it. "We should get going. I think my mom is already there and it's almost time anyways." I stand up, walk over to the mirror, brush slightly through my hair and walk out the door without looking if Rory is coming. He will come, eventually.