Harry and his friends thought it was gonna be another day in charm class, that is until they saw who was at Professor Flitwick's desk. There at the desk was that scary subsitute teacher Mr. Garvey.

They looked at each other with a 'tell me this isn't real look' and sat down at their desks. Once everyone was sitting down Mr. Garvey stood up with his clipboard.

"Alright we'll take a little roll here, H-eh-ree"

Harry sighs "Here"

"You are present? Her-my-on."

Hermione looks up from her book "Uh, here"

"Uh-huh. Dru-co.

"Here"

"Good..Ru-hon."

Ron just raises his hand.

"Thank you" Before Mr. Garvey is able to say the next name on the list Neville raises his hand.

"Mr. Garvey?"

lowers his clipboard sighs and rolls his eyes

"What is it Nev-el-el?"

"Some of us need to leave a few minutes early today."

Mr. Garvey widens his eyes and moves his head back a little bit "OH. Oh is that so?"

"Mm-hmm" Neville replies nervously

Mr. Garvey stands up, puts the pen he had in his hand in his shit pocket and walks over to neville and leans on his desk. "And what, pray tell is the reason for this premature exodus?"

"Yearbook photos. Um, we have to leave 15 minutes early to meet up with our clubs."

Mr. Garvey chuckles "Okay, alright you know what that may work on other subsitute teachers, but I taught in the inner city for over 20 years. Now, Y'all wanna leave my class early so Y'all can meet up at 'the club.' AIN'T NONE OF Y'ALL OLD ENOUGH TO GO TO THE DAMN CLUB! Ridiculous."

Neville raises his hand again "Mr. Garvey?"

"DUMB SON OF A BITCH!" Mr. Garvey breaks his clipboard over his knee throws it to the ground and truns to Neville "Did I St-st-st-st-st-stutter?"

Neville flinches "Just then, yes."

Mr. Garvey points to Neville then to the window "I'm gonna throw you out the goddamn window!" just then Hermione raises her hand "What Her-My-On?"

"Mr. Garvey, we're- we're telling the truth. We-we have clubs at this school. We have clubs for special interests."

Mr. Garvey has one hand on his hip "Okay, I see so y'all wanna play." He jumps like a dancer with his arms out. "Y'all wanna play. Yeah okay we gonna play little games." he stops jumping around. "Fine I'll play. I'm more than happy to play some games with y'all. Anyone who's in a club...Stand your ass up."

Hermione, Harry, Draco and Neville all stood up.

"Uh-huh. Oh, yeah, there it is the usual suspects. What the hell club you in, Her-My-On?"

Hermione looks nervous. "Future Leaders of Wizarding Britian."

Mr. Garvey scoffs "Okay, okay. How would you know if you're gonna be a leader in the future? Is there a Stargate in your bedroom? Can you travel through time Her-My-On?"

"No" Hermione answers in a soft voice.

"THEN SIT THE FLIP DOWN! " Hermione sits down. Mr. Garvey turns his attention to Harry

"H-eh-ree, I- Here's the thing, I don't even know why I'm about to ask you this. H-eh-ree, What Club are you in?"

"Um-Part of the Spanish club."

"Span-The Sp- You about as Spanish as Ree-on Seacrest with your big-ass fraggle rock hair!"

Harry slowly sits back down a little hurt at what he said. It wasn't his fault that a potion accident happened and caused his hair to grow all crazy earlier that day. Mr. Garvey looks at Draco with his arms crossed

"How 'bout you, Dru-co?"

"I'm in the slug club."

"Uh, I'm sorry Sweetheart, you are not in the slug club, the ferret club, maybe.

"That's hurtful." Draco says as he sits back down.

"Truthful."

Mr. Garvey then turns to Neville.

"Ah there he is, Nev-el-el."

"Heey" Neville says all nervous.

"What cluuub are you in?"

"I'm the president of the Glee Club...why did I talk"

"THE GLEE CLUB!? ARRRRGH" Mr. Garvey pushes everything on his desk on to the then turns around and goes straight to Neville and gets in his face.

"LIKE THEY ARE GOING TO HAVE A CLUB DEDICATED TO A TV SHOW! TAKE YOUR ASS TO DUM-BLU-DOR'S OFFICE RIGHT NOW BEFORE I BUST A CLUUUB UP IN YOUR BUTT!"

"Ok" Neville says all upset

"GO!" Mr. Garvey points to the door

" Okay, I'm gonna go" Neville says almost crying as he walks out of the classroom.

"MISCHIEVOUS AND DECEITFUL! CHICNEROUS AND DEPLORABLE."

All of a sudden there is a noise coming from the speakers that Dumbledore put in earlier in the month. Everyone turns to look at the speaker

"This is Headmaster Dumbledore. Students, please report to the Great Hall for your club photos."

Mr. Garvey turns around "Fake Announcement. Now, does anybody in here have a valid reason for leaving this classroom?...T-Mothy.

T-Mothy has his hand raised "I gotta pick up my daughter."

"You're Excused." Mr. Garvey said nicely.