verslawing
Roxas thinks his heart stutters in his chest when he sees that boy, red red red hair like kisses and bruises. Thirteen years old, Roxas plays Jacks with Namine and writes secrets he'd rather keep on her left arm. Her smile is tinted pink and she smells of toffee apples, but Roxas cant help his eyes from twitching to the left of her, to see that red red red hair like coffee kisses and anything but bruises. Axel, he is the feeling of a slightly bitter vertigo bubbling in Roxas' stomach, has to be at least three or four years older but Roxas cant withdraw his eyes. Namine frowns and nudges Roxas in the side, he winces for a moment before continuing to fiddle with the small sticks. Namine talks about how she plans to invite all her friends over at once when school is over, Roxas agrees and they resume the Jacks game with little to no speech. A ladle is still stirring at the cauldron inside Roxas' stomach.
It's chemistry class and Roxas is biting his nails again. He copies notes upon notes from Namine's text book, listening to Kairi whine to Xion so she can attract the attention of certain boys in the front row, Roxas muses. Finishing the notes, he listens to the rest of the lecture, and starts to kiss the back of his knuckles softly. Thinking of Axel again makes his stomach flurry and he squirms in his seat, asking to be excused to the bathroom. Roxas takes his leave and quickly hurries to the bathroom on the second floor, rucksack in tow.
He enters the bathroom to ironically find the redhead residing in his mind perched upon the milk sink alone, one headphone dangling from the front of his shirt and the other in his ear, a garage trap tune thumping through the buds. His eyes shift towards Roxas, who kind-of cowers. Roxas shuffles slightly towards the urinal, Axel watching his every waking step. He clunks his rucksack beside the urinal and unzips his fly. Axel laughs so loud, it bounces across the walls, Roxas hesitates to undo his pant button and hears the redhead approach him with heavy rubber soles. Axel places the palms of his hands on Roxas' shoulders. The blonde tenses, turning slowly to face Axel who is so close he can taste tea on his breath and see the Mediterranean sea's green hues in his eyes. Axel shifts closer to Roxas' face, and places a hand over the blondes pant button. Roxas closes his eyes shut, and wonders if blood is pouring from his ears as Axel pops the button open, the noise reverbs along bathroom tiles. He opens his eyes to see a rather questionable look on Axel's face, blinking, Roxas is then acquainted with a fist to his swirling gut, so hard that he heaves, vomit pours over axels blue Levi jeans in a gush. Axel pushes the heaving boy adjacent to him to the floor, grimacing at the sopping clothing before removing his shoes and jeans, shoving the Levis into the sink, turning the cold water on full. Roxas, sick still bubbling from his mouth, knuckles white gripping to one edge of the sink cabinet, hauls himself off the ground breath dry and course as if he had just ran miles. The sound of running water ceasing makes Roxas turn around. The thump of his headphones illustrates the whole scene, air density a little less thick than Roxas had anticipated thanks to the steady beat of the song. Axel is looking at him, gaze no longer tinted with the seas soft wave but his irises emit a shore of green disgust, much like the belch on his jeans.
"Ive seen you, always fucking looking at me with that same dazed expression like you, like youd fucking steal my socks and spunk in them if i left them in my gym locker."
Axel seethed, pausing his music via a pad on his headphones.
"That same expression that i just saw on your little-fucking-face"
With each word he stepped closer, Pantless, Roxas noted. The blonde boy no longer felt love and longing at this moment, the blood making his heart race was liquid fear, his vision of Axel was a grazed grey and all the pink bubbles from before had popped. At that moment the door swung open to reveal a tall, lean boy with a mullet shaded murky blonde. The scene was almost comical, if this newcomer hadnt of noticed the blood clot forming through Roxas' hair or the smell of vomit. Brows furrowed, Demyx walked further into the room,
"If it wasnt for the look of murder on your face, Axe, id of guessed you'd rape-"
Axel, grabbing his sopping jeans and shoes, walked straight past Demyx, grabbing his jacket from the back,
"You might want to wipe that look of your face too, Dem, that faggot just came in here to take pictures of my dick, "
Axels voice rang a few minutes after the bathroom door had slammed, or maybe a gallon of blood has escaped Roxas' head and made his thinking hazy. The school bell happened to have rang at that point, Roxas stood, washing the back of his head, watching pink bubbles of love swirl down the drain, or maybe it was just blood. He washed his face, and drank some tap water, still tasting stomach lining and possibly chlorine from Axels eyes or the salty tears of a teenage heartbreak. He exited the bathroom as if nothing had ever happened.
The bathroom escapade seemed as if it had lasted days to Roxas, and he suddenly felt weighed down and tired, maybe this was what dying was supposed to feel like? he mused, snapping back to reality when Namine appeared in his direct vision, not even a foot apart from him, he jumped back cautiously.
"What the hell, Rox, you were gone for the entire lesson, whats up? Where'd you go?"
"Just felt like bunking, Nam, " Roxas sighed
"Well you could have at least told me, idiot," She hit his side weakly laughing slightly.
Noticing his obvious discomfort she babbled on about her weekend with Kairi among st other things. After grabbing books from Namie's locker, they both headed to the school exit, Namine and he stood at the bus stop for a good few minutes before they both boarded, heading to the top seating area. They both sat in the front two seats whilst the bus began to get crowded, filling with students babbling a throng of stories, junctioning with others conversations under an undertone of many headphone's thumps and occasional sloppy kissing noises. The bus journey never took long, after 12 minutes Namine left for her stop with a curt goodbye, and promised a text which Roxas knew he would never receive.
Ten minutes later Roxas clumsily clambered down the bus staircase, only to be met by his name accompanied by jeering obsceneitys and shouts of his peers, including the voice of Axel if he remembered correctly, but he gave himself a moment of blissful ignorance by not turning to see who it was calling him a 'fucking faggot'. As soon as his stop arrived, he stepped off, trotting a few blocks down to 3 Marsh Lane, a cosy house enough to room all of jesus' diciples but instead housed three people each very diffrent worlds apart. Blue door with tinted windows, Roxas clambered up three stone steps before unlocking the door to find a barren household.
His room, second floor end left door, light still left on from earlier this morning throbbed a dull yellow glow from the slit in the doorway. Roxas stepped into a glumly lit bedroom, littered with baggies and glass tubes. Locking the door behind him, Roxas shuffled through a tin of Es to find green, Playstation logo printed ones, bagging them up all besides two which he left next to the bag on his bed. He stripped down, and showered, redressed as quickly as possible. Shoving a packet of Mayfair cigs into his back pocket along with the acid, he took the two leftover pills before bounding out the house to start another night of bullshit.