Disclaimer: I don't own Gundam Wing or any of its characters. I also don't own the song "Never Too Far". That is owned by Mariah Carey.
Warnings: Angst, yaoi, death.
Never Too Far
//You're with me
Til the bitter end//
"You know, Duo, I'm sick and tired of this bullshit! We never seem to agree on anything anymore! It's as if we can never get along lately!"
"Heero, I…"
"Goodbye, Duo. Maybe I'll be back when you learn how to grow up."
Duo watched with tears in his eyes as Heero opened the door and let it slam behind him. This wasn't the first time the two had gotten into a fight. They weren't just tiny fights, though; they would start out small, but then would escalate into bigger arguments. It had seemed to be an ongoing thing…one that Duo was sick and tired of.
Duo sighed, heading back to his and Heero's room. He flopped down on the bed, staring up at the ceiling. Hopefully, this was just another fight that Heero would blow off like he always did, and come back that same night, full of apologies and eager to make amends with the one he loved.
//What we had transcends
This experience
Too painful to
Talk about//
Heero tightened his grip on the steering wheel, angry thoughts racing through his head. Words couldn't describe just how he felt…he was more than mad. He was downright aggravated! He and Duo went through this almost every single night…Heero didn't know how much more of it he could take. In his mind, Duo was an immature adult…he never took anything seriously. Everything was a joke to him! Well, Heero had had enough, and he didn't know how long it would be until he went back to Duo.
As Heero continued to drive, he became more and more irritated. He wanted to get away from this town as fast as he could. Furiously, the Japanese male slammed his foot down onto the pedal and sped along the city roads. Angrily, Heero jerked the steering wheel to the right, making a fierce turn. In his anger, he didn't see the station wagon waiting at the stop sign, and before Heero had time to brake, it was already too late.
//So I'll hold it in
Til my heart can mend
And be brave enough to love again//
The sound of loud sirens outside caused Duo to open his eyes. Squinting, he looked at the clock, which read 4:00 a.m. Groggily, Duo rubbed his eyes and sat up. Since when had he fallen asleep? The last thing Duo remembered was lying in bed, waiting for Heero to come home…
Heero…where the hell was he?
Duo became worried. Heero usually came home by this time, no matter how mad he was. A tight knot formed in the bottom of his stomach as the sirens came closer and closer to the apartment. Yet, they didn't continue on in the distance…they stopped right outside of the apartment building. Gulping, Duo knew this couldn't be good. He just knew it. Something bad had happened to Heero.
The sound of footsteps on the stairs and the knocking on the apartment door confirmed Duo's suspicions. Tentatively, Duo placed his hand on the doorknob and opened it. There stood a policeman, a grim look etched on his features.
"Excuse me, young man, but is there a Duo Maxwell here?" the officer asked sternly.
Duo swallowed, feeling bile rise up in his throat. "I'm Duo Maxwell," he replied.
The officer shook his head. "I'm sorry, young man, but a friend of yours, Heero Yuy, unfortunately passed away in a terrible car accident a few short hours ago. I'm sorry to bring you the bad news." With those words said, the officer reached out and pulled Duo into a sympathetic hug, trying to comfort the poor teenager who was so close to tears.
After a few seconds, the officer pulled back. "Please, son, do try to be strong. I know it will be hard for you to pull through this. Such a tragedy…he was so young." With that, the officer offered his final condolences and left the apartment. Duo just stood there, feeling like a complete idiot, not knowing what to do.
//A place in time
Still belongs to us
Stays reserved in my mind
In the memories there is solace//
Finally, Duo made his way back to the room he and Heero once shared. He finally let the tears fall, and he cried his heart out, remembering all the times he and Heero shared together. Times that Duo knew were sadly taken advantage of.
That night, Duo Maxwell cried himself to sleep, thinking of his lost love.
//Never too far away
I won't let time erase
One bit of yesterday
Cause I have learned that
Nobody can take your place
Though we can never be
I'll keep you close to me
As I remember//
Quatre approached Duo, who stood in the funeral parlor, overlooking the casket where his dead lover lay. The blonde Arabian placed a comforting hand on his American friend's shoulder. Duo turned at the touch. Quatre offered a small smile of solace.
"I'm so sorry, Duo. Is there anything I can do?" Quatre asked, trying to be helpful.
Duo sighed. "It's okay, Quatre. I'll be okay."
"Are you sure?" the Arabian replied, concerned.
"Yeah."
With that, Quatre gave Duo a comforting hug and left him be, knowing Duo did not feel the least bit like socializing at this moment of grief.
//Glittering lights
Incandescent eyes
Still preserved
In my mind
In the memories I'll find solace//
A few days later, Duo lay on his bed, holding a framed picture of he and Heero. Duo groaned, wondering why it still hurt inside, wondering if it would ever go away.
However, the memories did not seem to fade; in fact, they seemed to get clearer and clearer. Duo remembered everything about Heero…it was just too painful. It wasn't that Duo wanted to forget—he just felt as if he couldn't stand the pain anymore. Every passing day brought on more and more hurt…just how much pain would Duo have to endure in his lifetime?
He was only 18…and yet, he had already lost a great deal. In his short life, he had already lost his parents, brother, and now, his lover was taken away too. Duo groaned, wishing it would just go away.
//Never too far away
I won't let time erase
One bit of yesterday//
Duo stood, wiping his face with the back of his hand. Maybe he could go somewhere to clear his head…he supposed a cup of coffee at the local diner would do the trick. Standing up and stretching his legs, Duo headed out the door and to his favorite diner a block away.
//And I have learned that
Nobody can take your place
Though we can never be
I'll keep you close to me
And I'll remember//
A few minutes later, Duo entered, his head downcast, his hands in his pockets. He waited for the hostess to seat him, not even bothering to look at the menu she kindly offered him. His only thoughts were on Heero, and how his life had been tragically taken away from him.
"May I help you?" a gentle voice asked, breaking into Duo's thoughts.
Duo looked up, only to lock eyes with one of the most beautiful men he had ever seen. Blue eyes, a mop of blonde hair, great biceps…he made Duo want to melt.
"What can I get for you, handsome?" the waiter asked.
"Just a cup of coffee, please," Duo said politely, trying not to give in to the temptation of telling this waiter how he felt.
To Duo's amazement, however, the waiter didn't leave. Instead, he took a seat in the booth directly across from Duo.
"Listen," he began, "I happen to think you're a very good-looking guy. Do you think…well, maybe you and I could get together sometime?"
Duo looked at this waiter oddly. "Isn't this kind of sudden?" he asked nervously, his eyes darting from the wall back to the table.
The waiter hesitated, then nodded. "Yeah, but don't you believe in love at first sight?"
Duo shook his head. "I apologize, but my heart belongs to another man," Duo explained.
The waiter stood. "I see," he replied. "Well, let me get you that coffee."
//A place in time
Still belongs to us
Stays preserved in my mind
In the memories there is solace//
As Duo drank his coffee, his thoughts once again drifted to his now deceased lover. Why couldn't he stop thinking about Heero? Did he really love him that much? Yes, of course, he did. He gave Heero his heart and soul…but never really knew if those feelings were returned.
Why had Duo allowed himself to live in doubt? He didn't truly know whether or not Heero had really loved him or not. And, Duo realized, he may never know.
Duo paid the bill and headed out, thoughts of Heero still etched in his head, that one nagging question still tugging at his mind.
//Never too far away
I won't let time erase
One bit of yesterday
Cause I have learned that
Nobody can take your place
And though we can never be
I'll always think of you and me
Always remember//
Duo entered his lonely apartment once again. He placed his keys on the table and checked the answering machine for any hints that someone may have called. Sighing when he found none, Duo flopped down on the couch, exhausted. He looked back over to the coffee table, and something caught his eye.
A white envelope was sticking out from in between the phone and answering machine. 'Funny,' Duo thought, 'I hadn't noticed this before.' Curiously, Duo walked over and picked the envelope up, and saw that it was addressed to him.
'This sure looks like Heero's handwriting,' Duo thought.
Anxiously, Duo opened the envelope and pulled out the letter. It read,
//Dearest Duo,
I'm sorry for the way I've been acting these past couple of months. I know that I've been a complete jerk, and for that I deeply apologize. I wish we wouldn't fight so often.
The reason for this letter is to let you know that you are loved. You are loved by somebody that you love yourself, although you're not aware of it. You, Duo Maxwell, are loved by me.
I know I may not show it, but I do love you. I've loved you ever since I've laid eyes on you. You are a beautiful person, Duo, inside and out. Don't ever forget that, and don't let anyone tell you otherwise. You have a spirit inside you that can never be broken…and I sure hope it never is.
I may not be alive tomorrow, so I want you to know this. I love you, Duo, with all of my heart and soul…always have and always will. Don't ever forget that.
Love Always,
Heero Yuy
XOXO//
Duo felt his eyes start to spill over as he read this letter. He no longer had to wonder…Heero really loved him.
"Heero…I love you too. Ai shiteru…for eternity."
//Love
You're never too far//
~End~