Justin pulled his collar up and hunched his shoulders against the cold. The door had slammed shut behind him, but her words were still ringing, shrew like, in his ears. He made his way along the path not sure where he was going but determined not to return till she'd calmed down. It was dark, cold but clear, he could see frost sparkling on the pavement and a couple of times he stumbled and slipped on the icy coating. The jacket he wore was inadequate against the cold but they had no money to spare to replace his old one. Every penny was accounted for, rent, food, bills, baby equipment...He'd never realised just how much one tiny thing needed but Becca assured him it was all necessary. Even if it meant they ate beans for a week, paid on the red reminders and generally went without. As to a social life, life was just a daily grind of school, shifts at Il Gnosh and the welcome oblivion of sleep. Realising he'd walked as far as the village, he slowed and looked in the windows, Gnosh was filled with Christmas shoppers, bags at their feet enjoying a coffee before heading home, he could almost feel the cheer wafting out onto the pavement; he moved on, Drive n' Buy was busy, windows filled with latest offers and last minute gifts. He'd squirreled Becca's awayunder their bed, he grinned, even if she suspected where it was there was no way she could get down there to look. He'd managed to find her something special, his share of the tips plus Tony in an unusually benevolent mood giving them all a Christmas bonus, covering it. He knew she would shake her head at the extravagance but this was their first real Christmas together and he wanted it to be unforgettable, although it would probably be that for all the wrong reasons. He scowled as he thought about their living arrangements, a bed-sit in the seedier side of town wasn't what they'd planned but the swiftness with which the building society had dispossessed them of the flat had left no time for flat hunting. Their meagre income gave no leeway either on their choice of property. Nancy had urged them to come with her home to Becca's mum, confess all and stay there but surprisingly Becca had refused. He blotted out memories of the day they left, Foz proving surprisingly kind and turning up with a mate and a transit to move their stuff, Becca's utter despair after she handed the keys to the estate agent, and finally alone in their tiny new home, her tears. Jake had made himself scarce whenever she'd asked him to help with the flat, pleading with Frankie it was in both their interests to keep up the payments. Frankie had been unsympathetic and unhelpful even telling her it was her just desserts. He vowed one day he'd get even with the Deans, with Jake, he kicked viciously at a stone in his path and scowled. One more score to settle; during a heated discussion about Jake's non contribution to the mortgage, Becca had let slip something that had raised his suspicions about the day Jake had discovered the affair. Through careful questioning of Nancy, insinuating he knew, he'd managed to glean enough to know Jake had threatened Becca, got physical and only her giving up his name had saved her from being beaten. It was a testament to his new found willpower that he hadn't tracked the bastard down there and then, no, he was waiting for an opportunity then Jake Dean beware he thought, you'll never know what's hit you. He carried on walking and found himself by the Dog, music and laughter spilling out every time the door swung open, he was tempted but what could he achieve? Being thrown out by Jack for being underage wasn't high on his list of priorities, no, this needed careful planning and opportunity, Dean could wait. He turned on his heel and retraced his steps, he'd no idea how long he'd been out but surely she'd have calmed down by now? All he knew was recently she'd been on such a short fuse it was difficult to recognise her as the fun loving, desirable woman of their afternoon trysts. He'd realised once they went public things would never be the same but he hadn't bargained on things being so different; he thought back to that last afternoon together before Mandy's dramatic intervention had changed everything. It had achieved perfect status in his memory, a high point by which he judged everything else they 'd done and nothing so far had come close, if anything it all seemed to be slipping away. He was determined even if their surroundings weren't perfect then Christmas itself would be, they'd get back on track and the new addition would be the icing on the cake. He hadn't given much thought to the baby, it was a constant in their lives but something abstract, something they worked towards, now it was nearly here and he didn't know what he really felt. Sure he'd convinced mum and the twins about his desire to be a dad, he thought he'd convinced Becca but had he convinced himself?