As the heavy door slammed shut behind her, she inhaled deeply and wondered why she was there. What was she hoping to find in this woman? When she saw Andrea Brown — complete with orange jumpsuit and matching wrist- and ankle-cuffs — sitting at the scuffed table, she remembered.
"What are you doing here?" Andrea asked softly, looking at her hands. "Don't you think you've done enough?"
"I wanted to tell you — " Alex stopped. "I wanted — I understand."
The brunette looked up quickly, anger flashing in her eyes. "You understand what it's like to kill your own baby, and then be told that your own guilt and grief aren't punishment enough? I doubt it, Miss Cabot, and I'd like to go back to my cell." She rose, signaling the guard.
"My sister — " Alex said quickly, breaking off when Andrea turned around. "My sister got pregnant. She was only sixteen. The baby had a problem — encephel-something — her brain wasn't forming right."
Andrea sat back down and nodded, silently allowing Alex to continue.
"Jess — my sister — she didn't have the baby." Alex took a shaky breath, realizing that she was releasing a long-held secret. She had never told anyone about Jess's abortion, not even Olivia. Especially not Olivia. "She didn't tell our parents. I helped her pay for it out of my Christmas money. I had to bike three miles to the clinic to give them the money. The baby — The baby's name would have been Gabrielle. I — "
A single tear ran down the stoic attorney's cheek, and she refused to wipe it away, as though to do so would be to admit defeat. She slumped into the chair next to Andrea. "I still feel guilty. I pray for her every night, and I don't know who I'm praying to. I'm not a Christian, I don't believe in God, but Jess does, and what if — "
"Shh," Andrea said, lightly stroking Alex's hair. "According to my religion, Sarah and Gabrielle are together with God. He will protect them, and they will protect each other."
Alex leaned into the touch slightly, willing herself to believe the woman sitting next to her.
"Why aren't you home with your detective, seeking comfort from her?" Andrea asked, startling Alex, whose eyes had fallen shut.
"What? How did you — "
Andrea laughed. "Relax. What's that song from the Julia Roberts movie? 'Something to Talk About'? You stand just a little too close, you stare just a little too long. And I'm observant."
Alex relaxed again. "Because I needed to talk to someone who would understand." She laughed, humorlessly. "And for some reason, a woman I helped sentence to 25-to-life is more likely than my girlfriend to understand me this time."
Andrea stood up, helping Alex to her feet. "Go home, Miss Cabot. Tell your detective. She'll understand." She brushed a fleeting kiss across Alex's lips, too quickly for Alex to respond.
As Andrea left the interview room, Alex spoke once more to her retreating back. "I really am sorry," she said, softly. Andrea's shoulders slumped, the only sign that she had heard Alex's final words.