a/n: Well, this will be a catchall place for drabbles and other incredibly short fictions I write for Saiyuki. Their subject matter, rating, and genre can be expected to vary greatly from one to the next. They are in no way related to each other, except that they are short. There will be language, out-of-characterness, Mary Sues (or at least parodies) and no explanations. Anyway, you have been warned. This first one requires some knowledge of Reload (Hazel and Gato).

Unexpected

It was just after five in the morning when Gojyo crept back into the room. He tried to be quiet, but felt far too horrible to do a good job of it. His head ached, his eyes ached, his spine felt like nine miles of bad road. The hint of dawn in the sky was already too bright, and the fresh morning air tasted foetid in his smoke-and-sleep tainted mouth. In short, it was a perfectly wretched morning. But it was about to get worse.

"Getting back a little late, aren't you?" Hakkai was already up. Of course Hakkai was already up. And dressed. And smiling that you-made-me-worry-so-now-I'm-going-to-make-you-pay smile. "I take it the lady was transcendent?"

"She was okay," he grumbled, throwing himself onto his as-yet-unused bed.

"Drank a little too much, did you?" Did he have to sound so cheerful? Gojyo pulled the pillow out from under his head and planted it over his eyes.

"What do you think?" Not that he really wanted to know. What he wanted was for Hakkai to do the honorable thing and either stop talking or just kill him now and be done with it.

"You don't usually stay out this late, though. What were you doing all that time?" There was never a gun when you needed one. Although at the moment, Gojyo really wasn't sure if he'd rather shoot Hakkai or himself. He sat up, abandoning the pillow and his hope of recuperation, and stared Hakkai in the eye.

"I fell asleep at her place, okay? I guess I was a bit more tired that I thought and we had a good time and I'd had a few too many and I just fell asleep!" The yelling made his head hurt, but it satisfied his soul. "Jeez, Hakkai, will you let me suffer in peace already? I wasn't expecting some sort of Spanish Inquisition!"

Just at that moment, the door opened again, and two surprised gazes shot to the madly grinning priest framed in the doorway. "NOBODY expects the Spanish Inquisition!" yelled Hazel gleefully. He leapt into the room with startling energy as Hakkai smiled sickly in utter bewilderment and Gojyo's eyes all but crossed at the insanity. Gato followed Hazel in, looking somewhat reluctant, and carrying a cushion and a comfy chair.

"Sorry about this," the tall man murmured, but Hazel was already raving about the nature of his chief weapons. It was going to be a very long day.

-ende-