xX FALLING OUT OF LOVE Xx
ONE-SHOT
Summary: The night takes a twist of events after Clare leaves Jake. Read and Review? :3
Disclaimer: I do NOT own Degrassi, nor do I own the Civil Wars or their fantastic song 'Falling' or any movies listed later, although I own three dream catcher bracelets. Enjoy ;3!
Haven't you seen me sleep walking?
'Cause I've been holding your hand
Haven't you noticed me drifting?
Oh, let me tell you, I am...
Please, please tell me you know
I've got to let you go
I can't help falling
Out of love with you
EVERYTHING UP UNTIL THE INCIDENT WITH SUMMER IS CANON. EXCEPT CLARE AND JAKE ARE STILL DATING. THIS IS NOT A CAKE STORY, MINOR CAKE BEFORE ECLARE.
Clare hadn't felt the same since she had tried to sleep with Jake. She felt like she wasn't in love with him anymore, but she had never felt the way she did with Eli. "Clare, can I talk to you?" Jake asked, Clare wondered if Jake was going to break up with her.
"Sure," she said with no emotion in her voice. She didn't really care; her thoughts were stuck on Eli again. They couple sat down on the couch, seeing as their parents were out; they could talk without the fear of being ease dropped on.
"Clare you don't seem happy anymore," he said to the blue eyed girl, making her want to lash out at him. Couldn't he see, she wasn't happy she hadn't been happy since before she had broken up with Eli.
"I'm not, Jake, I can't spend one day without thinking about him," they both knew who Clare was referring to when she said him.
"Don't let him get to you. He's moved on, right? So you can move on too," Jake said annoyed that her past was so much more important than her present. He wanted to be the one she thought about. Always.
"I just, I need to believe if that's true, but I can't," she said, "You didn't meet the Eli with emotions, you met him on those anxiety pills. He was so different before, that I just can't believe that he's moved on already." Jake sat uncomfortably; he didn't enjoy talking about Clare's ex who, in his point of view, she still had feeling for.
"Are you sure you don't have feelings for him? I don't want to be in a relationship if we both can't wholeheartedly devote ourselves to it."
"I... I don't know, Jake I think we should take a break, we can come back to this if we both still feel the same in a while," she said thinking about how they were really step-brother and step-sister now and how they have to act now, the way they should have been acting the whole time.
"If that's really what you want, to dump me and run back to the arms of Emo Boy, then you can do anything you want."
"Jake it's not that way," her voice dripping with sadness, "I just need time to figure everything out."
"Its fine Clare, we don't have to be together anymore. Wanna watch a movie or something, sis?" he said with remorse.
"Actually, I promised Alli that I'd go over to her house tonight," Clare lied, she hated lying but it was so easy.
"Okay do you need a ride?" he asked. "Nah, Mom and Glenn took his truck and Mom said I could take her car if I need. Plus I think I'll just walk. I might stay over though so don't wait up," she said smiling. She slipped her new phone into her jacket after getting all bundled up. Putting her wallet in her other pocket, she walked out of the house locking the door behind her and dropping the key into her pocket.
On the cold Friday night she walked down the sidewalk walking to the comic store by their bench. She had never been in the store but Eli spoke so highly of it she just hoped she could find what she was looking for. As she walked into the shop she was greeted by a girl her age whose name tag said Megan. Megan was dressed in all black and she had a off-centered labret piercing, the stud which of course was black.
"Hi," Megan said, "How may I help you?"
"Umm where can I find the April 2010 edition of Gothic Tales, if you have any I mean?"
"Yeah, We do. We have a lot because a local couple has a story published in it. Their names are Clare Edwards and Eli Goldsworthy, I'm pretty sure they go to Degrassi Community School," Megan said. "I'll go get it from the back just wait here, kay?"
Clare nodded her head yes, her curls bouncing up and down. She stood leaning on the counter, waiting for Megan to come back.
Megan walked back, and Clare asked, "How much?" Megan responded, "Only $5 because I'm not going to do the math, just don't tell Matt, my boss."
"Okay," Clare said taking out her wallet. She guessed had put her extra ID there because Megan said, "Oh my gosh are you the Clare Edwards?" "
Yeah," Clare said blushing, "I was only the editor."
"That's really awesome; so many people love your story."
"Eh," Clare said handing her the $5, "Eli did most of the work."
"It's still really cool," Megan said putting the bill in the cash register, "Will I see you around here anytime soon?" "Probably not, Eli's the one that likes comics,"
Clare replied, "Maybe if I see him around I'll tell him that you'd love to see him," with a smile.
Clare took the comic and thanked Megan, walking out into the cold, cold night. She walked for a few minutes before she came to the place she was looking for. The bench, their bench. She slid across it, trying to reenact what Eli had done a while ago, but she couldn't be as happy as before, because this time he wasn't with her. Their bench was full of so many memories: him telling her to scream after they had cut class; when she pushed him against the telephone pole, the sexual tension being so thick you could cut it with a butcher knife; their first date, getting their piercings; so much went on a darn bench. This bench. Their bench.
She thumbed through the comic until she came to their story. Stalker/Angel, as Eli had said 'Their First Published Story'. She read it thinking it was just as gruesome as she thought it was the first time. In the story, Malcolm had killed Rachel. He had cut her throat and drank her blood. Clare could never get over how gross and scary that was. Maybe Eli hadn't killed her like Malcolm did Rachel; maybe he did worse, smashed her heart when he smashed Morty.
After she finished reading the story, she closed the comic book and her eyes, let her head hang back. She missed Eli, plain and simple, she missed him. Then she felt something cold hit her face. She opened her eyes to prove that she was right, 'it's snow'. Closing her eyes again, she let the cold drops hit her face. She sat like that for a few minutes, until her phone buzzed.
Pulling her phone out, she pulled her knees to her chest. She looked at the text message, noticing it was from Alli, and didn't even bother to unlock her phone. Putting her phone back in her pocket, she pulled her knees closer to her. Clare closed her eyes again, 'I'll leave in a few moments', she told herself. Her eyes snapped open when she heard the bench creak under someone's weight. It couldn't have been her own, she hadn't moved. When she turned her head to her left she saw Eli.
Before Clare could even say a word Eli asked, "Clare, what are you doing here?"
"Relaxing, why are you here?" She countered.
The dark haired boy responded, "I come here pretty often."
"Why?" She asked quizzically.
"Sitting here, on this bench, reminds me of being happy, like when I was with you," he said truthfully. "Why do you have the Gothic Tales we were published in?"
"I finally caved and went into the Comic Book store, I just needed something different to read."
"Glad to know that you try to expand your reading material. I thought you hated our story?" he knew she had hated it, he wondered if she changed her mind.
"I did, I had re-evaluate it."
"And?" he knew she still hated it.
"I still don't like it," she said.
"Knew you wouldn't," he said with a smile, making her smile. His smile was very contagious.
"Ah, that's because we know each other so well," she said shivering from the cold.
"Well we should get you home, it's pretty cold," Eli said with concern for the blue eyed girl.
"Actually I was going to get some hot chocolate at the Dot," she said, "Would you like to join me?"
"Yeah, I'd love to," he said trying not to sound over enthusiastic. He stood up, offering her his hand to help her up and she took it, but immediately let go as soon as she started to walk to the Dot.
When they arrived at the Dot, Clare chose a place for the two to sit. "So blue eyes, why are you alone on a Friday night?" he asked.
"Well I was with Jake, but I broke up with him. I just needed some air, and now I'm here," she said, not including that he was the reason she had broke the relationship off.
"Oh," the boy stated his voice dripping with sadness. He quickly changed the subject and said, "How about we figure out what to order?"
'Read my mind' she thought. "That sounds great," she said. He handed her a menu and she opened it making her decision quickly. The raven haired boy took a little longer. And when they both agreed that they were ready to order, Eli called over the waitress, and told Clare that he's paying.
"I'll have a plain cheese burger with nothing else, French fries, and a hot chocolate," she ordered.
"I'll have the same thing as she's having," he said completely voiding his order. He didn't exactly know how to make conversation, but he was comfortable in the silence.
"So what'd you do for break, beautiful Blue Eyes?" he asked, and as he complimented her she blushed.
"Well, Glenn, Jake, my mom, and I all went to the cabin. I didn't have that much fun it was pretty boring, all I did was read," she replied thinking about how boring Christmas was for her.
"What'd read, anything good?" he asked. Both teenagers both loved reading and writing so it was natural that he would ask.
"Hm, now I've gotta think, I read a lot of good stuff over break. You know I read pretty fast. I read another Palahniuk book, a newer book called 'The Fault In Our Stars' by this author John Green, he's an amazing author, I re-read 'Just Listen' by Sarah Dessen, and I started to read a book of poetry by Edgar Allan Poe," she said listening off all the books she had read. She could read fast with long car rides, and bad cell service. Since the cabin had been refurbished she spent most of her time inside; she loved the interior.
"Wow, you're a speedy reader Edwards; what's your favorite quote out of all those books?" he asked wondering what she'd say.
"Well I definitely like the one in 'The Fault in Our Stars' that goes 'Suffice it to say that the existence of broccoli does not in any way effect the taste of chocolate' but I certainly like the quote from 'Just Listen', 'Don't think or judge; just listen'" the auburn hair girl said.
Eli combed his fingers through his raven bangs before saying, "Insightful," not one bit sarcastically. Their food was placed in front of them, and their waiter apologized for the drinks taking so long. Clare took a sip of the hot chocolate, thankful it was actually hot.
Eli took a bite of his burger, and then reached for the ketchup, not noticing that Clare was reaching for it also. Their fingers bumped and it reminded both of them of when they were together. Clare drew back her fingers embarrassed by what had just happened and said, "You can have the ketchup first," her face tinting pink.
"No, no, you can have the ketchup, ladies first anyways. I couldn't be ungentlemanly, now could I?" he said with a smirk, paying attention to the fact he made her blush. Clare put ketchup on her burger, next to her fries, and then handed the bottle to Eli who did the same.
"So what did you do over break," Clare said before dipping a fry in ketchup and then munching on it.
"Well my family took a trip to New York and I'm still looking for schools to apply to, but I think I really like NYU. Their theatre program is amazing! And they have awesome English professors. Do me a favor, Edwards, pick out the schools your applying to before you start senior year? It's just one less thing to worry about," Eli said as the auburn haired girl took a bite of her burger; Eli took a bite of his also, after he finished talking.
"That's pretty cool," Clare said, "So are you planning to stay on campus, or get an apartment. I know I'm applying to NYU next year, I'd love to get in."
"I think my parents are gonna let me get an apartment, thankfully. CeCe's been having these mini panic attacks because I might be leaving for so far away. Did you know it's 8 hours away from here?" Eli asked her before he munched away on his burger.
Clare frowned at the idea of him being so far away; they were just starting to be friends again. She took a sip of her hot chocolate before saying, "That sounds like CeCe; not in a bad way, I mean. It's really far," saying the last part with a longing tone.
Eli finished his burger and moved onto his fries, "It is far away but I can always come back and visit my parents and friends, like Adam and you."
Clare ate a French fry before saying, "That's cool," without trying to sound disappointed. Were they just friends now; could they never be anything more?
"Why do you seem so disappointed?" Eli asked after taking a sip of his drink.
"Well," Clare began after she finished her burger, "I'm just distraught that we can never be more than friends anymore. It seems like there's no possibility of us getting back together, or at least you make it seem that way." The auburn haired girl looked down at her fries and continued to eat them.
Eli pushed her chin up with his pointer finger and said, "Hey, Edwards, don't make me seem like the bad guy. I never said we're not getting back together, I never said that there's not a possibility, we just both need to stay friends for now. It would be so stupid for us to start something now, when I'm going to be miles away by the end of August."
"But why not do something while you're here? And you are definitely not the bad guy, don't ever think that," Clare said.
"Because I don't want to lose you again and if being your friend is the only the way to be with you, then I'll keep it that way. And you are the only one who could assure me of that," Eli said with the utmost concern. She was the only one who could remind him of that.
"Well, if you're worried about losing me; I'm not going anywhere. Plus I'll be going to NYU after I graduate," Clare said and placed her left hand out on the tabletop, hoping he would notice and take her hand.
Eli finished off his fries and placed his right hand on top hers, "I better not just be your rebound of Jake," only half jokingly.
"Jake was the rebound, I would never use you as a rebound," Clare said. Plus he wasn't a square like Jake, Eli's just not rebound material.
"That's good to know. I've got one question, though, when's it okay to kiss you?"
"I'm not sure, maybe you'd like to stay over my house tonight... so we can talk. But there's one condition, you've gotta go with me to Alli's so I can talk to her," Clare knew that both things that she was asking were very risky.
She didn't expect Eli to say, "Yes, I'd love to stay over your house, and if that means helping you make up with Alli, then I'd love to help. It took all my strength that night to not put my arms around you, after Jake and Alli kissed. I would never do that to you," but he did and she loved him for it.
"I'm glad you didn't, it would have made Jake so angry. I think he would have punched you," Clare said squeezing Eli's hand.
"You think I'd take that from him," said Eli and they both laughed.
Eli held the curly haired girl's hand the whole way to Alli's house. Clare knocked on Alli's door. He currently stood on Clare's left and she squeezed his hand.
Alli's mother opened the door and said," It's nice to see you, Clare, Eli. Alliah, you're friends are here to see you," her mother then yelled to Alli. Alli and Jenna then emerged from upstairs looking confused as to who would be there to see her.
"Mom, Can I talk to these two in private?" Alli asked her mother and nodded and went upstairs.
"Well, I didn't expect to see you of all people at my house, what's up," Alli said.
"Alli, I'm sorry about the whole weekend at Jake's cabin. I treated you badly after the whole thing with you kissing Jake. I should have forgiven you. I realized that Jake isn't even the one for me," Clare said.
"I should be the one saying sorry, I was the one who kissed your boyfriend/brother. I should have never done that. But I thank you for your forgiveness. I can clearly guess that you're with Eli then since you said Jake's not the one," Alli said and smiled at the two of them.
"Aw, besties," Eli said.
"Now I think you deserve a hug after the whole apology," Clare said and pulled the other girl into a hug.
"Sorry to inform you, but I'm not allowed to have people over that long, and I've gotta get back to painting Jenna's nails," Alli said.
"That's fine, I've gotta get home to break the news of Eli and me being together to Jake, he just might throw a fit. Text me if you need anything, I know you still have my number. Otherwise see you on Monday," Clare said to Alli.
"Bye guys," Alli said.
Clare and Eli headed out the door and Eli asked, "Is Jake really going to be that mad?"
"Only if he doesn't have another girl with him yet," but Clare highly doubted he didn't.
Clare unlocked the front door and stepped inside. 'Of course,' she thought, and saw Jake on the couch with another girl. "Go up to my room," she whispered to Eli. And Eli walked up the steps to Clare's room. Clare walked into the kitchen to get snacks; baked lays, fritos, pretzel rods, the 2 liter bottle of mountain dew, and two glasses.
When she walked through the living room she said, "Do you even know her full name," under her breath. She didn't even care; Eli was up in her room and they we're together. Once she got to her room, she placed the things on her floor and said, "I'll be right back." She ran into her brothers room and grabbed some DVD's; Dark Knight, The Runaways, Fortnight, and season 10 of Westdrive. It was her favorite season because of her favorite characters' romance, although she hated their tragic ending at the ending of the season. She placed the DVD's next to the snacks and noticed where Eli was; looking at her CD collection.
"You listen to sort of shitty music, you know that?" he asked with a smirk.
"Is that anyway to talk to your girlfriend?" she asked with a smile. "I know, I know, my music taste sucks," she said knowing it was true, "I listen to way too much pop music."
"Well, you do realize I A. have no clothes to wear to sleep and B. will have to sleep in your bed," he said wanting to point those things out to her.
"You have boxers on, correct? And I noticed that, you should be glad I love you, I don't let many people sleep in my bed at the same time as me," she said with a smile, thinking about them being together in her bed. She sat down on her bed, not caring what they did, as long as they were together.
"Gutsy much, Edwards?" he asked with a smile. He walked over to her, wrapped his arms around her, sat down next to her and said, "May I kiss you now, Miss. Edwards?"
She nodded her head yes before turning toward him and engulfing him in a kiss. Pushing him down on her bed, she straddled him, continuing to kiss him. She broke the kiss and said, "Hands, stay on my hips or above," and placed his hands on her hips demonstrating how far they could go. Their lips wrestled for dominance, and his won, and his tongue continued to explore her mouth. They kissed until they needed air.
They sat up and Clare fixed her hair. "Clare?" Eli said after the couple had regained their breath. "Yeah," she replied. "Are you okay with Jake being downstairs with another girl already?" he asked curiously.
"Well, I can't really complain when I've got a boy in my bedroom," she said with a smile.
"But you knew me before, has he even ever met that girl before?" Eli asked.
"Eli, he's the rebound guy, haven't you heard?" she asked with a straight face.
"I guess I'm glad that there are some people that even he can't make you get over," Eli said with a smirk. "Why the heck were a Fortnight DVD and a Westdrive DVD in his room?"
"All of the DVDs are in Jake's room, I lose them too easily," she said with a chuckle.
"So does he have scary movies too?" Eli asked. "I think so, but you know I don't like scary movies," Clare said, sort of scared because she knew he'd wanna watch something scary.
Eli got up and walked in to Jake's room, flinching at how messy his room was. Since Eli had beat his hoarding, he couldn't stand a mess. He went over to the DVDs and picked out Scream 5 that featured Shenae Grimes, who Eli thought looked at lot like Darcy.
Walking back into Clare's room, he said, "You and I are going to watch Scream 5 together, and then we can do whatever you want."
"Ugh, I knew you would do this; fine but you've gotta snuggle real close to me while this goes on, Kay?" she asked knowing he'd agree.
"You sure drive a hard bargain, Edwards. But if I get to have you in my arms then, sure," he said with a smirk, and then got up and put the DVD into the player. He sat down on bed and before he hit play he said, "Hey, do you have any popcorn?"
"Yeah, downstairs, I'll go get some," Clare said standing up and going downstairs, leaving Eli in her room. Once downstairs, Clare stood on her tiptoes to reach the popcorn in the cabinet. She read the instructions on the bag, put the bag into to the microwave and set the time, pressing the start button.
"So you did run right back to the arms of Emo Boy?" Jake scoffed as he walked into the kitchen. He got a bowl out of the cabinet and poured some Doritos into the bowl. Clare couldn't understand how he could stomach those; she hated them.
"Did your little whore leave already?" Clare asked annoyed that Jake even had the nerve to talk to her.
"That whore was Katie Matlin, the editor of the newspaper, I'll be sure to tell her you said that.
She'll be thrilled to hear that. And yes, my girlfriend, left," he said the venom dripping in his voice. Right before he turned and left Clare said,
"Isn't she supposed to be dating Drew Torres? I bet he'd be thrilled to hear that. Tell Katie I accidentally called her a whore, and I'll tell Drew you're dating his girlfriend," and then the timer for the microwave went off. Clare grabbed a bowl from the cabinet to the left of the microwave that was big enough to fit the bag of popcorn in and poured the popcorn into it. She ran up the steps, careful as to not trip and put the popcorn next to the other snacks, before pouring herself a glass of Mountain Dew. Clare looked over to Eli and noticed he was on her computer.
She walked over to him and sat next to him and after taking a sip of her Mountain Dew she asked, "What are you doing?" slightly annoyed.
"I'm reading your vampire fan fiction. Damn it, Clare this is really hot," he looked up at the date the document was created, "You wrote this in March of 2010. We were still together when you wrote this. Now I realize why Clara has such an attraction to the dashing vampire Elijah," he said with a chuckle. She gulped.
She reached over hitting the power button on her laptop, not even bothering to shut it down the right way. Clare placed her laptop on her desk and said, "That was a complete conscience, Elijah," she said with a laugh in spite of herself. "Yes it's about you, but not everything is about you, now let's watch the movie," she said giving her glass to Eli, getting up and hitting play.
Eli took a sip of her drink and she said, "You are aware that's how Mono spreads, correct?"
"Yup, but I'm pretty sure that neither of us have Mono, unless I'm wrong," he said moving his legs so he was sitting Indian style on her bed. Clare took the glass and placed it on her bedside table. She sat back down on the bed, Indian style also.
"Correct," she said. When the movie started Clare said, "That girl looks so much like Darcy."
"That's what I always thought," he moved so he was behind her, wrapping his arms around her, and putting one leg on either side of her. He hushed his voice so he didn't hurt her ears by being too loud,
"Maybe Darcy went into acting."
"Under a alias?" Clare asked, considering it to be a possibility.
"Maybe," Eli said. He got up and got the popcorn, placing it in Clare's lap.
Whenever she buried her head in his chest, he held her tighter, loving it when she squirmed. You're such a pervert, he thought. He took a few pieces of popcorn from the bowl in her lap and placed them in his left hand. Eli ate one, and took another and put it in front of Clare's mouth.
Clare noticed something in front of her mouth and she figured it was popcorn. Being, surprisingly, engrossed in the movie, she decided to stick her tongue out to feel the texture of the food.
Sure enough it was popcorn. She opened her mouth, allowing Eli to place the piece of popcorn in her mouth, and she chomped down on it.
"You and your tongue will be the death of me," Eli whispered into her ear.
"Sexually needy much?" she asked and he started tickling her. She giggled, and giggled and he continued to tickle her.
"Hey you're the one that had me in your arms, so you're the one with the upper hand," she managed to say between giggles.
"Fine," he said putting his hands up in surrender, and as soon as he did, she started tickling him. The popcorn had been placed near her pillows, since they had been sitting near the edge of her bed. She ended up on top of him, tickling him and he finally let out a chuckle.
She smiled and put her hands up in the air said, "Success!" Eli moved to tickle her but she rolled, apparently the wrong way making them both fall off the bed with a loud, thud! They were both looking into each other's eyes, Eli smirking, Clare blushing, yet smiling. She took advantage of the moment and captured her lover's lips in a slow but chaste kiss.
"God, Clare, if you wanted to be on top all you had to do was ask," he said his smirk breaking out into a full out grin.
She blushed her checks turning even redder. "Isn't that what started this whole thing, that landed us on the floor? Your needy sexual appetite?" she said copying his smirk.
"Smug much, Plath?" he asked.
"Of course, Huges," she said. "But we shouldn't compare ourselves to a writing partnership where the girl killed herself, should we?"
"No, I hope you never kill yourself. For my sanity, please don't?" he said with a straight face.
"Only for your sanity," she said smugly.
"Hm, I think we should get up now."
"Yeah, as much as I like you on top of me, I think we should get up," he said.
That earned him a playful chest slap from Clare. "You pervert," she said playfully. He pretended to look offended and she said, "I was kidding, honestly." Eli stood up and then helped her up.
Clare stifled a yawn and Eli said, "Blue Eyes, you tired?"
"Kinda, how about you?" she asked and looked at the TV. The ending credits were now playing. She looked over at her clock and noticed it was pretty late.
"It is pretty late," he said.
"Then let's go to sleep," she said and grabbed her things and ran to the bathroom.
Eli decided to take his shirt, pants, and belt off, not really wanting to strip off his clothes in front of Clare. In the bathroom, Clare changed into one her over sized Arcade Fire tee shirts and mesh shorts. She took her bra off but decided to leave her cotton underwater on. When she walked back into her room, she found a shirtless, pantless, boxer clad Eli. His boxers had a yellow Batman symbol on them.
Sexy, she thought. "I, um, like your underwear," she said slightly embarrassed that she actually just said that.
"Well, I'm sure if and when I see yours I'll like them," he said making her blush. She turned her lamp, on her side of the bed, on and turning the light on her fan off. Clare had no idea why she felt awkward. You're just going to sleep, she thought, with a guy in her bed. She buried herself under her covers, and soon after Eli joined her. He wrapped his arms around her, and she felt safe in his arms. She reached over and turned off her lamp, and then turned towards Eli and kissed him. Turing back towards the lamp, she said,
"It's nothing personal but I always sleep facing this way. Goodnight."
"Goodnight," he said his voice no more than a whisper, "I'm in love with you. Do you notice that?"
"I'm in love with you too," she said whispering also.
He started humming and then he asked, "Can I keep humming?"
"Sure," she said, "But what are you humming?"
"Eh, a cross between Tunnels by Arcade Fire and Paisley Jacket by Dead Hand, I don't really know."
Clare fell asleep first, and then Eli, neither one aware of the impending snowstorm.
xX End Xx
Yay! It's finished. Reviews are greatly appreciated. Maybe I'll do a spin off about the snowstorm. Stay Beautiful -Merp :3