This is for Bex who gave me the idea…really think it's time you were inducted in to the CM Fandom lady. The poem in this fic was written by a man named Alex who can be found at
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Saying Goodbye
Kate/Erin
…
Kate had only been with the BAU for a few months but she was already feeling like a part of the team, like they'd known one another for years. Today as she entered the BAU, the sombre tone around the room was evident. She knew of course the reason why. Today marked the second anniversary of the Section Chiefs death. Today they would go to the cemetery and pay their respects to the woman they'd come to think of as a friend. Everyone was dressed smartly, bright colours which Penelope knew Erin would have wanted. The drive to the cemetery was quiet, everyone lost in their own thoughts. Dave was seated next to Kate, his head down as he remembered Erin and the short time they'd been together. Kate's hand found her way to Dave's as she gave him a warm smile before turning back to the window, her own thoughts running to the woman who made her the agent she was today. A small tear ran down her cheek as she remembered the first time Erin had taken her to the shooting range in her last year at the FBI Academy, helping her to get her range up a little. They'd always had fun there, always laughing. Kate remembered the day Erin had filed for divorce, how upset she'd been over the dissolve of her marriage, the anger her children had felt towards her because of it. She recalled putting up the paper man on the board and telling Erin to go for it, shoot her anger away. It took Erin two rounds before she stopped and began laughing uncontrollably and then the tears had come. Kate set her own weapon down before she knelt down beside Erin and gathered the older woman in her arms.
"Kate…you okay?" Dave asked quietly.
"Yeah, I'm good."
…
It was a warm day, just the way Erin liked it. Everyone was standing around Erin's grave, taking turns as they all told small anecdotes about Erin and what she meant to each of them. Kate stood listening to them all and truly felt for each and every one of them, her own her breaking as she listened to them all. Dave stood beside Kate as he began to read a poem he'd found that decribed exactly how he felt, how he'd probably always feel for the woman he lost.
The beam shines down,
The rays so bright,
The stars come forward,
At the dead of night.
I feel you close,
You're always here,
The glow of the sun,
You're my star, my dear.
An angel gained,
A distance apart,
Our friendship lives on,
A place in my heart.
I feel you close,
You're always here,
The glow of the sun,
You're my star, my dear.
A loss like this,
Won't heal too soon,
You light the sky,
The sun, the stars, the moon.
I feel you close,
You're always here,
The glow of the sun,
You're my star, my dear
Everyone had tears in their eyes as Dave finished, silence surrounding them, Kate placed her arm through Dave's as she leaned in to him for a moment. Fresh flowers were placed around Erin's graveside, little tokens of love, a beautiful butterfly broach was placed on top from Penelope that Erin had always admired. It was getting late as everyone made their way back to the SUV, Dave turned to see Kate was now seated on a seat beside Erin's grave.
"Guys, why don't you all head back, I'll get a cab back with Kate."
"Dave, you sure…we can wait, it's no trouble." Hotch said.
"Something's going on with her, she might talk to me."
"Okay, I'll see you in the morning."
"Night Hotch and thanks everyone for today…it meant a lot."
"We all wanted to do this Rossi, Erin was a good woman."
"She certainly was Morgan, thanks."
Hotch got in to the SUV, followed by the others…giving once last glance at Dave before they drove off. Dave made his way back to Erin's graveside and took a seat beside Kate who was exceptionally quiet.
"Hey, you okay?"
"Yeah, I'm…"
"Kate what's going on?"
"Your poem just really got to me I guess."
"Come on, it's just us here."
"Where did they go?"
"They headed back; I said we'd take a cab. I thought you might want to talk for a bit, you've been a little strange today. I guess it must have been a little strange being involved with this memorial given that you didn't know her…or did you?"
"What?"
"Know her…Erin; the pain in your eyes kind of gave you away."
"You see that's the problem working with profilers, you can't hide anything."
"How did you know her, I don't remember her mentioning you."
"We lost touch, she was my trainer at the FBI Academy before I graduated, and she would give me extra coaching after hours. My parents lived in England; my sister was on a year's sabbatical in France so I was on my own over here. She took me under her wing, she would have me over to her house for dinner, I spend many times with her and her family…I even spent a Christmas with them one year."
"So how did you lose touch?"
"Life got in the way, I moved back to England for a while and when I came back I was moved to the LAPD for a while, we saw each other from time to time but I heard she'd got the job of Section Chief with the FBI and we kept saying we'd meet up but it never happened. I had to go home when my father died, I'd applied for a job here and a few years later I got this letter telling me I was accepted for a position with the BAU, I honestly had never been so happy. I'd tried calling Erin's cell to tell her I'd be joining her team but her phone was disconnected. I'd tried her home but I got nothing, I'd assumed she'd changed numbers. I wasn't bothered because I knew I'd be seeing her when I got here."
"And you arrive and find out she was dead."
Kate's tears fell freely from her eyes as she looked up at Dave.
"I…I had no idea she'd been killed. I knew it had been in the papers but with me being in England at the time…"
"I'm sorry Kate."
"Me too, she wasn't just a great teacher, a great mentor…she was like a second mom to me, she was the kindest woman I think I've ever had the pleasure of knowing and I'm really going to miss her."
Dave moved closer and wrapped his arms around Kate as she leaned her head on his shoulder.
"You know, the moment I met you I felt a connection to you somehow, now I know why…Erin."
"You really loved her?"
"I'll always wonder if things had been different if I'd just gone with her to her hotel room that night."
"You can't think like that Dave, you can't."
"I'd have married her you know; I loved that woman so much. She could be one hell of a pain in the ass but my god I loved her."
"I'm sure she knew that."
"I'm sure she did, look I'm going to go and call a cab for us…why don't you say your own goodbye, and I'll wait over there."
"Okay, thanks Dave."
Dave got up and left as Kate wiped her tears from her face, she got up and came to kneel in front of Erin's grave, her name carved with such loved.
"Hey Erin, long time no see huh. So I finally got the transfer, I'm now officially a member of your BAU…bet you never thought you'd see me there." Kate began to cry again as she ran her finger over Erin's name. "It's not fair you know, this shouldn't have happened to you. I never got a chance too…I never got to say thank you for all you did for me. It's because of you that I'm here; you made me want to be the best Agent I could, to be like you. I worked my ass off to make you proud of me, I really hope I did that. I'm gonna miss you so much Erin, we all are. You'd be so proud of your Team, they really love you, I love you…you were my second Mom and you always will be."
"KATE, THE CAB'S HERE."
Kate looked up to see Dave getting in to the cab. She got to her feet and pulled her jacket tightly around her.
"I have to go now, but I'll come back soon and see you…keep you up to date with everyone. Just know that everything they do every single day is for you, and thank you for making me the woman I am. Goodbye Erin, I love you."
Kate placed a small kiss to Erin's headstone before walking to the cab and sliding in beside Dave.
"You okay kiddo."
"Yeah, thank you for staying with me."
"We're family, it's what we do."
Dave wrapped his arm tightly around her as Kate closed her eyes and leaned in to Dave.
…
-Fin