"Tomorrow's Tears" by Mainecoon
Note: this story takes place sometime between the end of the Quest and Frodo's journey to the Grey Havens, shortly after the Scouring of the Shire.
***
Twilight cast an eerie glow over the Shire. The calm of the evening fluttered over the land, touching everything gently as a moth's wing. In the midst of the calm, a calm unknown to him since what seemed to him a lifetime or more, Samwise Gamgee sat leaning his back against the outer wall of his home and watching the fiery pastels of the burning horizon. To most of the Shire's residents, it was just another sunset to mark the end of just another day. Tomorrow, the routine would begin all over again. But to Sam, it was a time apart from other times. He was alive. He was well. He and his beloved master had emerged victorious from the darkest pits of war and pain. And yet…
Sam was startled out of his thoughts when a soft, familiar voice said, "Good evening, Sam." He spun around to see Frodo standing right beside him.
"My goodness, master Frodo! You gave me quite a start! I didn't hear you come up the walk…"
"I know." Frodo smiled. "You seemed quite intense on watching nothing. Tell me, Sam, is nothing a very interesting thing to watch?"
"Oh, it's terribly interesting, sir," Sam replied in mock seriousness.
Frodo chuckled softly. "Good. Then you can tell me about it as we walk. You… will accompany me, Sam?"
"Of course!" Sam jumped to his feet, no less eager to join his friend on a walk through the Shire than he had been to join him on a quest to save all of Middle-Earth. "Where shall we walk to?"
"Oh, I've a particular place I want you to see," Frodo said as they made their way to the main road. "It's not far. I'd like to get there before the sun goes out completely, so keep up! We can take our time on the way back."
Sam followed his master's lead. They walked at a fairly quick pace. It was not long before Frodo led their trek off the main road and into a wooded area. From there they went down a steep hill and to a wall of thick vines.
"Just beyond here," Frodo said as he pushed his way through. "Watch for the pricker bushes on the left! Step lively now… good show, Sam!"
They practically fell out of the thick undergrowth onto a surface of smooth, flat stone. There was a small clearing through which a stream ran. The dancing water was illuminated by the twilight, so that it looked more like a stream of flowing gold, fine silk, and shadowy blue jewels. A mist hovered over its surface.
"It's beautiful," Sam whispered, almost afraid that his voice would break the enchantment.
"Yes," Frodo agreed. For an instant, his fair, sad face took on an even sadder countenance. But before Sam could be sure he had seen it, it was gone. Frodo sat down on a rock near the edge of the stream and motioned for Sam to join him.
They sat together for several minutes before either of them spoke. "Now tell me, Sam," Frodo said at last, "What's troubling you."
"Me, sir?" There was obvious confusion in the younger hobbit's voice. "Troubled? Why, I've no troubles in the world now that we're all safe back home, and the Shire's all fixed up…"
"But you have, Sam. I can see it. I've seen too much not to know when there are troubles in the eyes of a friend." Frodo caught his friend's eyes, but Sam turned away.
"Ain't nothing for anyone to worry of, 'specially me," he mused. "I'm not the worrying sort, you know?"
Frodo nodded. "But you have been brooding over something for a while now, Sam."
Sam frowned, obviously engaged in some inner debate. "I won't lie to you, master Frodo," he said slowly. "The fact is, sir, there's something I've been trying to put out of my mind that just won't go. That's really what worries me."
"What is it, Sam?"
"Well… Have you ever felt… that is… It's like this, sir…" He knit his brows together, trying to decide how to put his wandering thoughts into sensible words.
"Take your time, Sam," Frodo murmured, sensing his companion's frustration.
Sam took a deep breath and tried again. "It's like this, master Frodo… Since things have quieted down, we've all gone back to living our old ways, just the same as if nothing ever happened. Even Mr. Merry and Mr. Pippin have fallen back into their old ways. It's as if the past never happened."
"This troubles you?" Frodo tilted his head slightly. The fading sunlight glinted off of his curly hair.
"Well that's just it, sir. It shouldn't. It's the way of our folk, always has been. But sir, what worries me, is that I can't just forget everything that's happened to us. Every moment I look at anything at all and I remember a time when it wasn't there, or a time when we weren't here to see it. Every time I try to push it out of my mind, I only see the darkness that much clearer for it."
Sam stared into the shimmering water. Frodo took his friend's hand gently. "It is the way of our race, Samwise, but that doesn't mean it must be so for us. We were the ones chosen to remember. You and I have a special duty to remind our people of the hardships they faced once, lest they forget and grow careless once more." He gave Sam's hand a soft squeeze.
"I was never born for such a task, sir," Sam answered sadly. "I'm no hero. I'm not a great king or a wise wizard. I'm just Sam."
"And that is enough for you to be," Frodo said. "I can't make the others remember, because I have forgotten what it is to be one of them. You are still Sam. You are still the curious young boy who set out with me so long ago. But I am not the same Frodo. I've changed, Sam. The kind of change I've had can never be undone."
Sam's voice was low and clouded by darker thoughts. "I don't understand you rightly, sir, but I don't think I much like the sound of that."
"Perhaps not… but it's true all the same. There's one true thing for us, though, Samwise…"
"What's that?" Sam looked into his master's eyes for the answer.
"We're not alone. We have each other."
Sam sighed. "That's right enough, master Frodo, but if I may be quite frank, it's hard. It's hard being the only one, even if there's you. There's still no one else."
"Rosie?" Frodo asked.
"She's never known war, master Frodo. She's just like all the others in that way. Mr. Merry and Mr. Pippin as well -- they've seen their own wars, but they never held anything so big as we did... never had to carry the fate of the whole world, you see? They can forget, like all the others..."
"Don't say that, Sam. It only makes things worse."
"Worse?" A tear rolled down Sam's cheek. He brushed it away, hugged his knees to his chest. "I just want to be able to forget, too."
"Oh Samwise…" Frodo put his arm around his friend's shoulder and touched their foreheads together. "There are times when I miss you so much."
"And I you, sir," Sam said. He was trying, unsuccessfully, to hold his tears back. "I almost wish there'd never been a quest… and yet… I can't wish that!"
"You can wish anything you like, Sam. Just don't wish us to be apart. You are my dearest friend. You always will be. But a time will come when I must leave you."
"I'd just as soon not think of leaving your side ever again," Sam sniffed. "I couldn't stand it."
"Yes, you could." Frodo thumbed Sam's tears away. "We all must face a time when our paths will cease to be side by side."
"Don't let that time be soon, sir. Please…" Sam flung his arms around Frodo's neck, crying quietly. Frodo returned the embrace. The two of them sat holding each other until the last light of the sun was nearly gone. Then, without speaking a word to each other, the walked slowly back to the main road. During the whole of the walk, Sam never loosened his grip on Frodo's hand, nor did Frodo try to pull away.
When they reached Sam's home, Frodo put his hands on hid friend's shoulders. "Weep no more for me, dear Samwise," he whispered. "For you are shedding tomorrow's tears. Keep them until their time comes." He kissed Sam's forehead and they parted. Sam watched Frodo walk down the moonlit road until he disappeared from his sight.
"Don't leave too soon," he said to the night. Then he, too, turned to find his own haven from the world.
...end...
Note: this story takes place sometime between the end of the Quest and Frodo's journey to the Grey Havens, shortly after the Scouring of the Shire.
***
Twilight cast an eerie glow over the Shire. The calm of the evening fluttered over the land, touching everything gently as a moth's wing. In the midst of the calm, a calm unknown to him since what seemed to him a lifetime or more, Samwise Gamgee sat leaning his back against the outer wall of his home and watching the fiery pastels of the burning horizon. To most of the Shire's residents, it was just another sunset to mark the end of just another day. Tomorrow, the routine would begin all over again. But to Sam, it was a time apart from other times. He was alive. He was well. He and his beloved master had emerged victorious from the darkest pits of war and pain. And yet…
Sam was startled out of his thoughts when a soft, familiar voice said, "Good evening, Sam." He spun around to see Frodo standing right beside him.
"My goodness, master Frodo! You gave me quite a start! I didn't hear you come up the walk…"
"I know." Frodo smiled. "You seemed quite intense on watching nothing. Tell me, Sam, is nothing a very interesting thing to watch?"
"Oh, it's terribly interesting, sir," Sam replied in mock seriousness.
Frodo chuckled softly. "Good. Then you can tell me about it as we walk. You… will accompany me, Sam?"
"Of course!" Sam jumped to his feet, no less eager to join his friend on a walk through the Shire than he had been to join him on a quest to save all of Middle-Earth. "Where shall we walk to?"
"Oh, I've a particular place I want you to see," Frodo said as they made their way to the main road. "It's not far. I'd like to get there before the sun goes out completely, so keep up! We can take our time on the way back."
Sam followed his master's lead. They walked at a fairly quick pace. It was not long before Frodo led their trek off the main road and into a wooded area. From there they went down a steep hill and to a wall of thick vines.
"Just beyond here," Frodo said as he pushed his way through. "Watch for the pricker bushes on the left! Step lively now… good show, Sam!"
They practically fell out of the thick undergrowth onto a surface of smooth, flat stone. There was a small clearing through which a stream ran. The dancing water was illuminated by the twilight, so that it looked more like a stream of flowing gold, fine silk, and shadowy blue jewels. A mist hovered over its surface.
"It's beautiful," Sam whispered, almost afraid that his voice would break the enchantment.
"Yes," Frodo agreed. For an instant, his fair, sad face took on an even sadder countenance. But before Sam could be sure he had seen it, it was gone. Frodo sat down on a rock near the edge of the stream and motioned for Sam to join him.
They sat together for several minutes before either of them spoke. "Now tell me, Sam," Frodo said at last, "What's troubling you."
"Me, sir?" There was obvious confusion in the younger hobbit's voice. "Troubled? Why, I've no troubles in the world now that we're all safe back home, and the Shire's all fixed up…"
"But you have, Sam. I can see it. I've seen too much not to know when there are troubles in the eyes of a friend." Frodo caught his friend's eyes, but Sam turned away.
"Ain't nothing for anyone to worry of, 'specially me," he mused. "I'm not the worrying sort, you know?"
Frodo nodded. "But you have been brooding over something for a while now, Sam."
Sam frowned, obviously engaged in some inner debate. "I won't lie to you, master Frodo," he said slowly. "The fact is, sir, there's something I've been trying to put out of my mind that just won't go. That's really what worries me."
"What is it, Sam?"
"Well… Have you ever felt… that is… It's like this, sir…" He knit his brows together, trying to decide how to put his wandering thoughts into sensible words.
"Take your time, Sam," Frodo murmured, sensing his companion's frustration.
Sam took a deep breath and tried again. "It's like this, master Frodo… Since things have quieted down, we've all gone back to living our old ways, just the same as if nothing ever happened. Even Mr. Merry and Mr. Pippin have fallen back into their old ways. It's as if the past never happened."
"This troubles you?" Frodo tilted his head slightly. The fading sunlight glinted off of his curly hair.
"Well that's just it, sir. It shouldn't. It's the way of our folk, always has been. But sir, what worries me, is that I can't just forget everything that's happened to us. Every moment I look at anything at all and I remember a time when it wasn't there, or a time when we weren't here to see it. Every time I try to push it out of my mind, I only see the darkness that much clearer for it."
Sam stared into the shimmering water. Frodo took his friend's hand gently. "It is the way of our race, Samwise, but that doesn't mean it must be so for us. We were the ones chosen to remember. You and I have a special duty to remind our people of the hardships they faced once, lest they forget and grow careless once more." He gave Sam's hand a soft squeeze.
"I was never born for such a task, sir," Sam answered sadly. "I'm no hero. I'm not a great king or a wise wizard. I'm just Sam."
"And that is enough for you to be," Frodo said. "I can't make the others remember, because I have forgotten what it is to be one of them. You are still Sam. You are still the curious young boy who set out with me so long ago. But I am not the same Frodo. I've changed, Sam. The kind of change I've had can never be undone."
Sam's voice was low and clouded by darker thoughts. "I don't understand you rightly, sir, but I don't think I much like the sound of that."
"Perhaps not… but it's true all the same. There's one true thing for us, though, Samwise…"
"What's that?" Sam looked into his master's eyes for the answer.
"We're not alone. We have each other."
Sam sighed. "That's right enough, master Frodo, but if I may be quite frank, it's hard. It's hard being the only one, even if there's you. There's still no one else."
"Rosie?" Frodo asked.
"She's never known war, master Frodo. She's just like all the others in that way. Mr. Merry and Mr. Pippin as well -- they've seen their own wars, but they never held anything so big as we did... never had to carry the fate of the whole world, you see? They can forget, like all the others..."
"Don't say that, Sam. It only makes things worse."
"Worse?" A tear rolled down Sam's cheek. He brushed it away, hugged his knees to his chest. "I just want to be able to forget, too."
"Oh Samwise…" Frodo put his arm around his friend's shoulder and touched their foreheads together. "There are times when I miss you so much."
"And I you, sir," Sam said. He was trying, unsuccessfully, to hold his tears back. "I almost wish there'd never been a quest… and yet… I can't wish that!"
"You can wish anything you like, Sam. Just don't wish us to be apart. You are my dearest friend. You always will be. But a time will come when I must leave you."
"I'd just as soon not think of leaving your side ever again," Sam sniffed. "I couldn't stand it."
"Yes, you could." Frodo thumbed Sam's tears away. "We all must face a time when our paths will cease to be side by side."
"Don't let that time be soon, sir. Please…" Sam flung his arms around Frodo's neck, crying quietly. Frodo returned the embrace. The two of them sat holding each other until the last light of the sun was nearly gone. Then, without speaking a word to each other, the walked slowly back to the main road. During the whole of the walk, Sam never loosened his grip on Frodo's hand, nor did Frodo try to pull away.
When they reached Sam's home, Frodo put his hands on hid friend's shoulders. "Weep no more for me, dear Samwise," he whispered. "For you are shedding tomorrow's tears. Keep them until their time comes." He kissed Sam's forehead and they parted. Sam watched Frodo walk down the moonlit road until he disappeared from his sight.
"Don't leave too soon," he said to the night. Then he, too, turned to find his own haven from the world.
...end...