Dance with Me, or Burdens

By fallintofantasy

1. Heavy

"Are you strong enough to stand,

Protecting both your heart and mine?"

-Florence + the Machine, Heavy in Your Arms

They always watched sunsets together. It was one of the few times when Maya could hope that it would all work out, when she could hope that they could stay together.

The way the changing colors of the setting sun reflected off the deep blue water, creating a kaleidoscope of colors. The way the gentle sea breeze blew in her face, blowing her hair out. The way he held his arms around her, holding her close, as she leaned into him.

It created a sense of serenity; made her feel like everything was perfect, that nothing was wrong. But deep in her heart, she knew she couldn't stay with Zack. That she couldn't keep piling her burdens on his shoulders and still expect him to love her. To keep expecting him to have her heart locked away in safety; he had his own to protect, otherwise he'd become vulnerable.

If her past caught up with her, all the burdens she'd piled on Zack would crush him. She couldn't have a happy future; but it didn't stop her from trying to make sure Zack did.

She couldn't wait any longer; she had to do it now. Do it before she cut too big a wound in him, before she could leave an even bigger scar than she already had.

"Um Zack?" she said, turning around to look at him. He released his arms from around her, looking at her with love littering his eyes. So pure; innocent. It nearly broke her heart to try to break his; but she had too. For his own safety.

Maybe it wouldn't hurt him as much; they hadn't even said the 'binding' words yet. It wouldn't do much harm. It was still fresh.

"Yes, Maya?" he said quietly.

"I-I need to talk to you about something. Something important."

A slight look of confusion gripped his face. "What?" he asked.

"We-um… I need to say… that…" she tried to get out, struggling to find words, avoiding eye contact.

He moved closer to her, wrapping his arm around her and lifting her chin so she could look at him.

"Say what?" he whispered.

"We- we need to break up," she said suddenly.

"I lo- what?" he said, staring at her face.

His expression shattered, becoming replaced by a look of confusion and hope; hope, that she didn't just say what she did. Maya eyes widened as she realized what he thought she was going to say. And he was just about to return it. She looked away, progressing with some difficulty.

"We… can't stay together. I'm breaking up with you," she said, a tear streaming down her face, her voice becoming muffled with slight sobs. He stared at her with a look of dis-belief, his mouth slightly open.

"But- I thought…" he started, his eyes starting to water, his voice threatening to break down.

"I'm sorry Zack," she said through tears, "But we can't stay like this. You're too good for me. I- I can't r-risk hurting you."

"No, Maya. Please- don't," he begged, tears streaming down his face.

"I-I'm sorry, Zack," she choked, pulling away from his embrace.

"Don't do this, Maya. Please- don't… don't leave me."

"No! Jus-just go! Just go! Please; just leave me alone!"

He stared at her, his face red, fresh tears streaming down his cheeks, a look of confusion and hurt on his face. Why? What had he done?

"But-"

"Just go! Go away!" she shrieked, leaning back on the ship's rail.

He stared at her with a look of defeat, for just a split second, then turned away from her, slowly walking away with his hands in his pockets until he couldn't take it anymore; he ran.

"I'm sorry," she whispered, sinking down with her back against the wall. She was squinting, her eyes releasing tears more rapidly now. "I-I'm sorry," she whispered to him. For him. Sobs began to claim her as she place her head on her knees, choking with sadness. Light was rapidly fading away, and she looked to her right, at the sinking sun.

For the first time since she had fallen in love, Maya Bennett watched the sunset alone.