Secrets
By Creassya
This is my Devotion Series. Chandler and Monica live together in apartment 20. Joey lives across the hall by himself. Phoebe and Rachel are roommates, and Ross and his girlfriend live together. I have to warn you that this series touches on some very sensitive issues. I truly hope that the subject matter offends no one. I felt compelled to write about this very common occurrence that often happens in families.
As I walk into the room I smile at the beautiful form asleep on her back that could only belong to Monica. I close the door quietly and walk over to her. I watch her for a few seconds before I kneel beside the bed. I take her hand in mine and kiss it softly. She doesn't wake up until I touch her face with my right hand. She opens her eyes and turns her head to look at me.
"What are you doing up so early?"
"It's eleven o'clock."
"Are you kidding?"
"See for yourself."
She sits up and looks at her clock that's located on her nightstand.
"How could I have slept this long?"
"Do you have to ask that question after the night we had?"
"I guess not."
I get up off my knees and sit on the bed. She leans in and gives me a soft peck on the mouth.
"How long have you been up?" She asks.
"Not long."
"Oh."
"I'm going to the coffeehouse."
"All right. I'll be down whenever I get myself together."
"Okay."
I stand in the mirror looking at how pitiful I look. I mean my clothes are fine, but I can't seem to get rid of these dark circles under my eyes. Rather than fuss over it, I quickly leave my room. I quietly walk down the hall, through the kitchen and out the back door without being seen or heard. I hate having to leave out after they get up, like yesterday. I try to avoid my mother and stepfather as much as possible. I don't have any friends, so I pretty much just hang out anywhere, like the park, the malls, anything to pass the time. When it gets late, then I return home. Sometimes I like the solitude, but other times, I crave for someone to talk to. As I walk pass this coffeehouse, I see this cute guy about to go in.
"Hey gorgeous." I say to him.
"Hi."
"Mind if I join you?"
"My girlfriend is joining me."
"I don't see her with you," I say touching his chest."
"How old are you?"
"Does it matter?"
"I guess not, being that I have a girlfriend."
"I'm not inviting you back to my place or anything. I just wanted some company."
"I see."
"I don't usually do this."
"You can join me, as long as you know that I'm taken."
"Too bad," I say before walking away.
I'm tempted to look back in his direction, but I don't. I keep walking, willing myself not to follow him. I also fight the urge to go in to see if he's really meeting his girlfriend. I have nothing better to do. This is crazy. I can't do that. He'll think I'm stalking him or something. Oh well, I'll just go to my usual place and hang out.
When I walk over to Chandler and sit down, I notice that he has a concerned look on his face. I sit beside him for a few seconds before saying anything.
"Chandler."
"Hey."
"Are you okay?"
"Yeah."
"Are you sure?"
"Before I came in here, this woman, or should I say this girl, tried to pick me up."
"You're very attractive sweetie. That kind of thing happens," I say grinning.
"She had to be about sixteen or seventeen at least."
"Really?"
"Yeah. I don't know why, but I feel bad for her?"
"Why?"
"She's a pretty girl, but it looks like she has a rough life."
"How so?"
"She was smiling at me but her eyes looked so sad."
"How long did you talk to her?"
"Less than a minute. When I told her that I was meeting my girlfriend here she didn't seem to care, but she walked off. Now I see how you feel."
"About that little boy I saw a couple weeks ago?"
"Yeah."
"Are we over reacting to these situations?" I ask.
"I don't know."
Ten minutes later, Ross and Tammy walk in and sit down at the small table next to the couch. We cut our conversation short when they take their seats. Weeks ago, while I was at the mall with Rachel, waiting for her come out of Lord & Taylor I decided to walk around. I didn't have much money so I only brought an outfit. While window-shopping I noticed a little boy sitting alone on a bench. He looked as if he were about to cry. So I went over to him thinking that he had gotten lost and couldn't find his parents.
"Hi."
"Hi," he responded sadly.
"Are you okay?" Are you lost?"
"No."
"Well, how come you're sitting here all by yourself?"
"I'm waiting for my sister and her boyfriend."
"Do you want me to help you find them?"
"They told me to wait here."
"Are you sure you're not lost? It's okay if you are. It happens. I got lost at the mall when I was about your age."
"I wish I were lost."
"Why's that?"
"Never mind."
Just as I sat down next to him, a girl and a guy walked over to us, who he described as his sister. She had long red hair, and green eyes. She and her boyfriend didn't seem too happy to see me sitting there with him.
"Let's go Eric," she said, glaring at me.
She took him by the hand and they walked away. The boyfriend's glare turned into a stare. He turned his head and winked at me. I felt really uncomfortable and quickly got up. The whole scene was unnerving. When I told Rachel what happened and how I felt about it, she thought that I was making too much out of it. For the past couple of weeks, I've been thinking a lot about that little boy. I got the feeling that something wasn't right. He was sad and his sister was angry for some reason. It could have been a little argument between them or something and I felt that I probably had made too much out of it, but it still bothered me. When I asked the boy if he was lost, he said that he wished he were. I keep thinking replaying those words over and over again in my head, wondering why he would say something like that. Things had to be pretty bad if he felt that way. I couldn't sleep that night thinking about it. I even went back the day after hoping I would see him. After a couple hours, I gave up and went back home. I know I tend to get obsessive about things, but this feeling just won't go away. I wish I knew why.
"Monica."
"What?"
"Tammy asked you a question." Chandler says.
"Oh, I'm sorry. My mind was somewhere else."
"Want to talk about it?"
"It's nothing. What was the question?"
"I was saying that since the guys were going to the Knicks game tonight, you and I should hang out."
"Oh sure, that sounds good."
"Mon, are you okay?"
"Yeah, why?"
"You seem distracted," Ross says.
"I'm okay."
When Ross got home, we ate and showered together. After he'd fallen asleep, I began to think about things. Wanting privacy, I get up out of bed, and come into the living room. I don't bother to turn on the TV. I walk over to the couch and sit down. Every once in a while I get this really lonely and empty feeling. Although I'm quite happy with my life with Ross, there are other aspects of my life I'm not happy with. There are things in my life that I don't discuss with anyone, especially about my childhood. Not even with Ross. I know that I should, but it's really difficult to talk about. All my life I've been trying to forget the past. But as I get older I just want to face the past so I can finally deal with it and finally put it to rest. I just don't know how or where to start. Ross comes into the living room interrupting my thoughts.
"What are you doing out here?" He asks, sitting next to me.
"I couldn't sleep."
"Something bothering you?"
"No."
"So, you're fine?"
"Yeah."
"Tammy, why don't you ever tell me when something is bothering you?"
"Ross I…"
"Is it that bad that you can't talk to me about it?"
"Why do you always have to make a big deal out of nothing?" I ask.
"Because, obviously it's not nothing that gets you like this. Why don't you confide in me? Am I that hard to talk to?"
"Ross, I keep telling you that it's not you. It's me."
"That doesn't make me feel better. Sometimes I feel like I don't know you."
"I'm sorry if you feel that way, but there are some things I'd rather keep to myself."
"You keep everything to yourself."
"No I don't."
"Yes you do. This is probably the reason you can't sleep at night."
"Because I don't tell you what's bothering me?"
"Because something is eating away at you."
"How do you know?"
"I can tell. I hate pushing you to tell me things, but I want to help. You're always listening to my problems. I want to hear yours."
"What if I don't want you to hear my problems?"
"I'll leave you alone then," he says.
He gets up off the couch and heads back to the bedroom.
"Ross…"
"I won't push you anymore. If you really want to let me in you will."
He closes the door as I sit here with tears in my eyes. Why can't I just tell him? Why is it so difficult? I ask myself as I wipe the tears from my eyes in frustration.
I bolt upright in bed out of breath and sweating. I look around the dark room paranoid. I wipe the tears from my eyes, wishing I were someplace else. I hate it here. I have to find somewhere else to go. I can't take anymore. Now is the time I wish I had some friends. There's no one I can stay with. I had friends before it happened. Thinking that I was lying about it, they quickly turned their backs on me. Now I'm left with no one to turn to, no one who believes in me. Suddenly, I began to sob out of control. Grateful that my room is downstairs, I don't hold back the tears or quiet my sobs. What I need is someone to put an arm around me and hold me until I stop crying. A soothing voice to comfort me. Someone to tell me things will get better, someone who I can believe in, who also believes in me. I need my mother. I lost her when she married my stepfather. He turned her into someone I hardly know anymore. Someone who I've lost respect for.
Getting angry, I climb out of bed, turn on my nightlight on my nightstand, and take off my nightclothes. I slip on my clothes and my jacket that are hung up in my closet. I go over and unlock my door before going back over to my nightstand to turn off the light. I quietly walk over to the door and close it on my way out. I move quickly toward the back door, feeling as if someone's watching me. When I'm out of the house, I sigh in relief. Not caring where I end up, I just walk the streets. Being that I'm up and gone before my mother and stepfather, and return after they've gone to bed, I don't see them. And I like it that way. I look at my watch and see that it's two o'clock in the morning. Being that I can't sleep, there's no need for me to stay home…at my mother's house I should say. It hasn't been home to me for a while. Ever since my mom married Lenny the jerk. I hate that bastard. While walking I let the tears fall freely, making no attempt to wipe them away. When I reach Central Park, I sit on the closest bench available to me. As the tears cease after a while, I start to feel a little better. Not much though. Thinking about what happened to me a couple years ago fills me with anger and determination. I can't go on this way. My mother made her choice. She chose that good for nothing husband of hers over me with no friends or family to help me out of this situation, I have to depend on myself. I know that if my aunt were around, I wouldn't have to worry about a place to stay.
As soon as it happened, she would have taken me out of that house. She and my mother had a falling out and we hadn't seen or heard from her in seven years. She was my favorite aunt. She was like my second mother. I miss her so much. I think about her a lot and wish I knew how to find her. I wonder what she looks like now. I wonder if she's married with kids or If she's still here in New York or not. I need to find her. Only I don't know where to start.
A month has passed since that girl approached me at the coffeehouse. It's weird, but I still think about her. I didn't even get her name. I still keep thinking about those sad green eyes, and what her story is. As I'm walking out of the bedroom, Joey walks in and stands in the kitchen.
"Are you ready?"
"Oh yeah."
"I thought I'd have to twist your arm about coming with me."
"Are you kidding? I haven't been to a strip club since I moved in with Monica."
"Too bad Ross is stuck home with the misses."
"Well, I'm gonna enjoy myself tonight."
"You'd better. It's not often Monica and the girls go away for the weekend."
"You think they took her to a strip club?" I ask.
"I don't know."
"Okay, let's not keep the ladies waiting." I say jumping around.
I walk into my room and slam the door. I go over and sit on my bed wishing I were anywhere but here. My sister's lucky that she's old enough to be gone all day. She doesn't have to stay here and get yelled at all day everyday. Why can't she take me with her more often? I hate it here. I tried running away before, but my mom found me and I was grounded for a month. It wasn't much of a punishment. I'm not allowed to do anything anyway. They won't let me do things other boys my age do. I can't go on camping trips. I can't go off the porch most of the time. I can't play sports with my friends, or go on class trips. I feel like I'm in prison. Like I'm in hell. I sometimes sit here and wonder what I've done to deserve being treated like this. All of my friends have normal lives. Why can't I? I have to get out of here. If I run away again I'll have to go someplace where they won't think to look. I can't go over any of my friends' house because I'll get in trouble. I get up and go over to my dresser and pull open the drawers. I grab my backpack and throw my clothes in. I toss my Gameboy in last and zip the bag. By the time I finish cleaning my room they should be asleep. Then I'll leave.
After being here for hours on end, I'm ready to go. It's clear that Joey isn't though.
"Joey, time to go." I say.
"Come on. Let's stay another hour."
"That's what you said an hour ago."
"One more hour," he says not taking his eyes off the naked woman leaving the stage.
Seconds later, another woman comes on stage and I can't believe my eyes. She's wearing a nurse's cap, tight white shirt, short mini skirt, and a stethoscope around her neck. She smiles at the crowd and begins to move seductively. The men in the audience love her. The first thing she removes is her cap. She waves it around in the air before throwing it into the crowd. Seconds later, she removes the stethoscope from around her neck while walking toward the end of the T-shaped stage. I can't take my eyes off her. As she notices me, her expression changes instantly. She's surprised to see me. And I'm just as surprised to see her. She's not old enough to be dancing here. She can't be more than seventeen. She keeps moving, but her eyes remain on me. Those sad green eyes. Not only are they sad this time, they're full of shame. She slowly unbuttons her shirt, but hesitates to take it off. The men in the crowd notices and some of them yell at her to take it off.
"I think she likes you Chandler." Joey says.
"I know her."
"You do?"
"Yeah."
How do you know her?"
Ignoring Joey's question, I get up just as she turns and runs off the stage.
"Let's go."
Joey agrees to wait outside with me until she comes out of the club. After waiting for fifteen minutes, she emerges.
"Hey," I call out to her.
"Oh great. It's you."
"What are you doing here?" I ask.
"I should be asking you the same thing. Won't your girlfriend be mad? I hope you don't expect me to do both of you because that's not my thing."
"How old are you?"
"Why?"
"Because I don't think you're old enough to be working here."
"It doesn't matter. I just got fired. Thanks to you."
"What?"
"Never mind. I hate that place anyway. I just need the money."
"There are other ways…"
"Spare me okay. I don't have time to wait around for good money."
"Are you in some kind of trouble?"
"Yeah lots."
"I'm serious."
"So am I. I can't go back home."
"Why not?" Joey asks.
"I just can't," she says, as tears form in her eyes.
"Did someone hurt you?"
"Yes."
Joey and I look at each other. I knew from the moment I saw her that she was in trouble. She looked from us to some guy across the street. He's getting out of the car with a friend of his. I can't really see his face that well because it's dark. Her eyes become wide and she grabs hold of me and hides behind me…
Next up…ESCAPING THE PAST
By Creassya
This is my Devotion Series. Chandler and Monica live together in apartment 20. Joey lives across the hall by himself. Phoebe and Rachel are roommates, and Ross and his girlfriend live together. I have to warn you that this series touches on some very sensitive issues. I truly hope that the subject matter offends no one. I felt compelled to write about this very common occurrence that often happens in families.
As I walk into the room I smile at the beautiful form asleep on her back that could only belong to Monica. I close the door quietly and walk over to her. I watch her for a few seconds before I kneel beside the bed. I take her hand in mine and kiss it softly. She doesn't wake up until I touch her face with my right hand. She opens her eyes and turns her head to look at me.
"What are you doing up so early?"
"It's eleven o'clock."
"Are you kidding?"
"See for yourself."
She sits up and looks at her clock that's located on her nightstand.
"How could I have slept this long?"
"Do you have to ask that question after the night we had?"
"I guess not."
I get up off my knees and sit on the bed. She leans in and gives me a soft peck on the mouth.
"How long have you been up?" She asks.
"Not long."
"Oh."
"I'm going to the coffeehouse."
"All right. I'll be down whenever I get myself together."
"Okay."
I stand in the mirror looking at how pitiful I look. I mean my clothes are fine, but I can't seem to get rid of these dark circles under my eyes. Rather than fuss over it, I quickly leave my room. I quietly walk down the hall, through the kitchen and out the back door without being seen or heard. I hate having to leave out after they get up, like yesterday. I try to avoid my mother and stepfather as much as possible. I don't have any friends, so I pretty much just hang out anywhere, like the park, the malls, anything to pass the time. When it gets late, then I return home. Sometimes I like the solitude, but other times, I crave for someone to talk to. As I walk pass this coffeehouse, I see this cute guy about to go in.
"Hey gorgeous." I say to him.
"Hi."
"Mind if I join you?"
"My girlfriend is joining me."
"I don't see her with you," I say touching his chest."
"How old are you?"
"Does it matter?"
"I guess not, being that I have a girlfriend."
"I'm not inviting you back to my place or anything. I just wanted some company."
"I see."
"I don't usually do this."
"You can join me, as long as you know that I'm taken."
"Too bad," I say before walking away.
I'm tempted to look back in his direction, but I don't. I keep walking, willing myself not to follow him. I also fight the urge to go in to see if he's really meeting his girlfriend. I have nothing better to do. This is crazy. I can't do that. He'll think I'm stalking him or something. Oh well, I'll just go to my usual place and hang out.
When I walk over to Chandler and sit down, I notice that he has a concerned look on his face. I sit beside him for a few seconds before saying anything.
"Chandler."
"Hey."
"Are you okay?"
"Yeah."
"Are you sure?"
"Before I came in here, this woman, or should I say this girl, tried to pick me up."
"You're very attractive sweetie. That kind of thing happens," I say grinning.
"She had to be about sixteen or seventeen at least."
"Really?"
"Yeah. I don't know why, but I feel bad for her?"
"Why?"
"She's a pretty girl, but it looks like she has a rough life."
"How so?"
"She was smiling at me but her eyes looked so sad."
"How long did you talk to her?"
"Less than a minute. When I told her that I was meeting my girlfriend here she didn't seem to care, but she walked off. Now I see how you feel."
"About that little boy I saw a couple weeks ago?"
"Yeah."
"Are we over reacting to these situations?" I ask.
"I don't know."
Ten minutes later, Ross and Tammy walk in and sit down at the small table next to the couch. We cut our conversation short when they take their seats. Weeks ago, while I was at the mall with Rachel, waiting for her come out of Lord & Taylor I decided to walk around. I didn't have much money so I only brought an outfit. While window-shopping I noticed a little boy sitting alone on a bench. He looked as if he were about to cry. So I went over to him thinking that he had gotten lost and couldn't find his parents.
"Hi."
"Hi," he responded sadly.
"Are you okay?" Are you lost?"
"No."
"Well, how come you're sitting here all by yourself?"
"I'm waiting for my sister and her boyfriend."
"Do you want me to help you find them?"
"They told me to wait here."
"Are you sure you're not lost? It's okay if you are. It happens. I got lost at the mall when I was about your age."
"I wish I were lost."
"Why's that?"
"Never mind."
Just as I sat down next to him, a girl and a guy walked over to us, who he described as his sister. She had long red hair, and green eyes. She and her boyfriend didn't seem too happy to see me sitting there with him.
"Let's go Eric," she said, glaring at me.
She took him by the hand and they walked away. The boyfriend's glare turned into a stare. He turned his head and winked at me. I felt really uncomfortable and quickly got up. The whole scene was unnerving. When I told Rachel what happened and how I felt about it, she thought that I was making too much out of it. For the past couple of weeks, I've been thinking a lot about that little boy. I got the feeling that something wasn't right. He was sad and his sister was angry for some reason. It could have been a little argument between them or something and I felt that I probably had made too much out of it, but it still bothered me. When I asked the boy if he was lost, he said that he wished he were. I keep thinking replaying those words over and over again in my head, wondering why he would say something like that. Things had to be pretty bad if he felt that way. I couldn't sleep that night thinking about it. I even went back the day after hoping I would see him. After a couple hours, I gave up and went back home. I know I tend to get obsessive about things, but this feeling just won't go away. I wish I knew why.
"Monica."
"What?"
"Tammy asked you a question." Chandler says.
"Oh, I'm sorry. My mind was somewhere else."
"Want to talk about it?"
"It's nothing. What was the question?"
"I was saying that since the guys were going to the Knicks game tonight, you and I should hang out."
"Oh sure, that sounds good."
"Mon, are you okay?"
"Yeah, why?"
"You seem distracted," Ross says.
"I'm okay."
When Ross got home, we ate and showered together. After he'd fallen asleep, I began to think about things. Wanting privacy, I get up out of bed, and come into the living room. I don't bother to turn on the TV. I walk over to the couch and sit down. Every once in a while I get this really lonely and empty feeling. Although I'm quite happy with my life with Ross, there are other aspects of my life I'm not happy with. There are things in my life that I don't discuss with anyone, especially about my childhood. Not even with Ross. I know that I should, but it's really difficult to talk about. All my life I've been trying to forget the past. But as I get older I just want to face the past so I can finally deal with it and finally put it to rest. I just don't know how or where to start. Ross comes into the living room interrupting my thoughts.
"What are you doing out here?" He asks, sitting next to me.
"I couldn't sleep."
"Something bothering you?"
"No."
"So, you're fine?"
"Yeah."
"Tammy, why don't you ever tell me when something is bothering you?"
"Ross I…"
"Is it that bad that you can't talk to me about it?"
"Why do you always have to make a big deal out of nothing?" I ask.
"Because, obviously it's not nothing that gets you like this. Why don't you confide in me? Am I that hard to talk to?"
"Ross, I keep telling you that it's not you. It's me."
"That doesn't make me feel better. Sometimes I feel like I don't know you."
"I'm sorry if you feel that way, but there are some things I'd rather keep to myself."
"You keep everything to yourself."
"No I don't."
"Yes you do. This is probably the reason you can't sleep at night."
"Because I don't tell you what's bothering me?"
"Because something is eating away at you."
"How do you know?"
"I can tell. I hate pushing you to tell me things, but I want to help. You're always listening to my problems. I want to hear yours."
"What if I don't want you to hear my problems?"
"I'll leave you alone then," he says.
He gets up off the couch and heads back to the bedroom.
"Ross…"
"I won't push you anymore. If you really want to let me in you will."
He closes the door as I sit here with tears in my eyes. Why can't I just tell him? Why is it so difficult? I ask myself as I wipe the tears from my eyes in frustration.
I bolt upright in bed out of breath and sweating. I look around the dark room paranoid. I wipe the tears from my eyes, wishing I were someplace else. I hate it here. I have to find somewhere else to go. I can't take anymore. Now is the time I wish I had some friends. There's no one I can stay with. I had friends before it happened. Thinking that I was lying about it, they quickly turned their backs on me. Now I'm left with no one to turn to, no one who believes in me. Suddenly, I began to sob out of control. Grateful that my room is downstairs, I don't hold back the tears or quiet my sobs. What I need is someone to put an arm around me and hold me until I stop crying. A soothing voice to comfort me. Someone to tell me things will get better, someone who I can believe in, who also believes in me. I need my mother. I lost her when she married my stepfather. He turned her into someone I hardly know anymore. Someone who I've lost respect for.
Getting angry, I climb out of bed, turn on my nightlight on my nightstand, and take off my nightclothes. I slip on my clothes and my jacket that are hung up in my closet. I go over and unlock my door before going back over to my nightstand to turn off the light. I quietly walk over to the door and close it on my way out. I move quickly toward the back door, feeling as if someone's watching me. When I'm out of the house, I sigh in relief. Not caring where I end up, I just walk the streets. Being that I'm up and gone before my mother and stepfather, and return after they've gone to bed, I don't see them. And I like it that way. I look at my watch and see that it's two o'clock in the morning. Being that I can't sleep, there's no need for me to stay home…at my mother's house I should say. It hasn't been home to me for a while. Ever since my mom married Lenny the jerk. I hate that bastard. While walking I let the tears fall freely, making no attempt to wipe them away. When I reach Central Park, I sit on the closest bench available to me. As the tears cease after a while, I start to feel a little better. Not much though. Thinking about what happened to me a couple years ago fills me with anger and determination. I can't go on this way. My mother made her choice. She chose that good for nothing husband of hers over me with no friends or family to help me out of this situation, I have to depend on myself. I know that if my aunt were around, I wouldn't have to worry about a place to stay.
As soon as it happened, she would have taken me out of that house. She and my mother had a falling out and we hadn't seen or heard from her in seven years. She was my favorite aunt. She was like my second mother. I miss her so much. I think about her a lot and wish I knew how to find her. I wonder what she looks like now. I wonder if she's married with kids or If she's still here in New York or not. I need to find her. Only I don't know where to start.
A month has passed since that girl approached me at the coffeehouse. It's weird, but I still think about her. I didn't even get her name. I still keep thinking about those sad green eyes, and what her story is. As I'm walking out of the bedroom, Joey walks in and stands in the kitchen.
"Are you ready?"
"Oh yeah."
"I thought I'd have to twist your arm about coming with me."
"Are you kidding? I haven't been to a strip club since I moved in with Monica."
"Too bad Ross is stuck home with the misses."
"Well, I'm gonna enjoy myself tonight."
"You'd better. It's not often Monica and the girls go away for the weekend."
"You think they took her to a strip club?" I ask.
"I don't know."
"Okay, let's not keep the ladies waiting." I say jumping around.
I walk into my room and slam the door. I go over and sit on my bed wishing I were anywhere but here. My sister's lucky that she's old enough to be gone all day. She doesn't have to stay here and get yelled at all day everyday. Why can't she take me with her more often? I hate it here. I tried running away before, but my mom found me and I was grounded for a month. It wasn't much of a punishment. I'm not allowed to do anything anyway. They won't let me do things other boys my age do. I can't go on camping trips. I can't go off the porch most of the time. I can't play sports with my friends, or go on class trips. I feel like I'm in prison. Like I'm in hell. I sometimes sit here and wonder what I've done to deserve being treated like this. All of my friends have normal lives. Why can't I? I have to get out of here. If I run away again I'll have to go someplace where they won't think to look. I can't go over any of my friends' house because I'll get in trouble. I get up and go over to my dresser and pull open the drawers. I grab my backpack and throw my clothes in. I toss my Gameboy in last and zip the bag. By the time I finish cleaning my room they should be asleep. Then I'll leave.
After being here for hours on end, I'm ready to go. It's clear that Joey isn't though.
"Joey, time to go." I say.
"Come on. Let's stay another hour."
"That's what you said an hour ago."
"One more hour," he says not taking his eyes off the naked woman leaving the stage.
Seconds later, another woman comes on stage and I can't believe my eyes. She's wearing a nurse's cap, tight white shirt, short mini skirt, and a stethoscope around her neck. She smiles at the crowd and begins to move seductively. The men in the audience love her. The first thing she removes is her cap. She waves it around in the air before throwing it into the crowd. Seconds later, she removes the stethoscope from around her neck while walking toward the end of the T-shaped stage. I can't take my eyes off her. As she notices me, her expression changes instantly. She's surprised to see me. And I'm just as surprised to see her. She's not old enough to be dancing here. She can't be more than seventeen. She keeps moving, but her eyes remain on me. Those sad green eyes. Not only are they sad this time, they're full of shame. She slowly unbuttons her shirt, but hesitates to take it off. The men in the crowd notices and some of them yell at her to take it off.
"I think she likes you Chandler." Joey says.
"I know her."
"You do?"
"Yeah."
How do you know her?"
Ignoring Joey's question, I get up just as she turns and runs off the stage.
"Let's go."
Joey agrees to wait outside with me until she comes out of the club. After waiting for fifteen minutes, she emerges.
"Hey," I call out to her.
"Oh great. It's you."
"What are you doing here?" I ask.
"I should be asking you the same thing. Won't your girlfriend be mad? I hope you don't expect me to do both of you because that's not my thing."
"How old are you?"
"Why?"
"Because I don't think you're old enough to be working here."
"It doesn't matter. I just got fired. Thanks to you."
"What?"
"Never mind. I hate that place anyway. I just need the money."
"There are other ways…"
"Spare me okay. I don't have time to wait around for good money."
"Are you in some kind of trouble?"
"Yeah lots."
"I'm serious."
"So am I. I can't go back home."
"Why not?" Joey asks.
"I just can't," she says, as tears form in her eyes.
"Did someone hurt you?"
"Yes."
Joey and I look at each other. I knew from the moment I saw her that she was in trouble. She looked from us to some guy across the street. He's getting out of the car with a friend of his. I can't really see his face that well because it's dark. Her eyes become wide and she grabs hold of me and hides behind me…
Next up…ESCAPING THE PAST