A/N: Written for the Hummel Holidays prompt 'winter wedding', and inspired by an old episode of 'Mad About You'.
Adam doesn't see Kurt when he walks into their apartment, working in the kitchen when Kurt storms though the door, but he hears his fiancé's footsteps, and they sound harried, tense.
"Hey, Kurt," he calls out from the kitchen, knowing full well that, by announcing his presence, he may have himself in the path of an oncoming hurricane. "Rachel felt a bit under the weather, so I sent her home, and I'm finishing up those little net baggy things of pastel almonds-"
"Forget it!" Kurt yells, peeling off his slush-soaked coat and dropping it to the floor with a wet sploitch before Adam has a chance to come in and help him. "Just…just stop everything because we're not having this wedding!"
"Uh-oh," Adam mutters, abandoning the tulle and the almonds, and rushing to Kurt's aid. This is the fifth time in as many months that Kurt has "canceled" their wedding. Not because he doesn't want Adam for a husband. It's simply that, as time goes on and the date comes closer, Kurt doesn't want the hassle that comes with planning a wedding. Disagreements with the caterers, arguments with the florists, problems with the venue, artistic differences with the photographer – it's becoming too much.
"So, who was it this time?" Adam asks ahead, putting on speed when he sees Kurt standing in the entryway, drenched from head to toe, sopping hair clinging to his face, drops of melted snow rolling down his flushed cheeks like tears.
Except Kurt's not sad. He's mad.
"The band," Kurt grumbles, nearly growls. "Tell me, why did we hire that imbecile instead of going with a deejay? Or maybe even an iPod set on shuffle?"
"He came highly recommended," Adam explains. He takes off Kurt's shirt, then removes his own bulky wool sweater, putting it on Kurt since it's already warm.
"By who?"
"By you," Adam chuckles. "You hired him for your stepbrother's wedding to Rachel five years ago, remember?"
Kurt squints, not immediately recalling the memory.
"Oh…right. Well, his I.Q. has dropped sharply in the last five years," Kurt says, his irritation level receding as he sinks into Adam's nutmeg-and-cinnamon scented sweater.
"Come on, hun" - Adam takes Kurt's hand and walks him through their apartment to the bedroom – "let's get you dried up before you catch your death of pneumonia." Adam leaves him by the closet and fetches Kurt a clean towel.
"You know, I've been thinking," Adam says, handing Kurt the towel and watching him pat his hair dry, hands shaking as they start to warm up, "maybe we shouldn't have a wedding."
"What?" Kurt asks, nearly dropping his towel. "What do you mean not have a wedding? It's in less than a month! Do you…don't you want to marry me?"
"Of course, I want to marry you," Adam says, taking Kurt's hands in his. "There's nothing I want to do more at this very moment than be your husband. But, you're under so much stress..."
"I just want it to be perfect," Kurt argues.
"I want it to be perfect, too," Adam agrees, "but not at the expense of your health."
"It's…it's not that bad," Kurt says, forcing himself to relax though he doesn't really feel it. "I'll handle it better. I promise."
"It's not about handling it better, love," Adam says, trying to make Kurt understand, but Kurt looks so close to tears, he knows he's not explaining himself well. "Look, tell me this, what do you want? Right this second, what do you really, truly want?"
"I just" - Kurt sniffles, wiping his nose with the corner of the towel – "I just want to forget about it all, at least, for a little while. I just" – He chuckles as a thought pops into his head, an absurd thought, but it sounds so nice - "I want to be married to you, right now. Have a wedding that's just for the two of us. And then, I won't have to worry about the wedding wedding being perfect or not. I won't care that the photographer needs to use eight thousand filters, or about the caterer's crappy hors d'oeurves, or that the band guy's being an ass. I'll have you, and we'll be husbands. The rest will be a party."
"And what will we tell everyone?" Adam asks, secretly warming up to the idea.
"We don't have to tell them anything." Kurt shrugs. "It would be for us, remember? They wouldn't need to know."
Adam smiles. He grabs Kurt around the waist, and kisses him slowly, Kurt's cold lips warming fast beneath the heat of Adam's mouth.
"Let's go then," Adam says, quickly getting Kurt out of his clothes.
Kurt laughs, assuming Adam's planning on making love to him after his sappy, romantic suggestion, but he stops when he sees Adam pick out a new pair of slacks and a dress shirt.
"Wha-what do you mean let's go?" Kurt asks, confused as to why Adam would want him to get dressed again. "What are you doing? Are we going out?"
"There's a minister on the corner of 9th, collecting money for The Holy Apostles Soup Kitchen. We'll slip him a couple hundred and ask him to marry us."
"But, how do you know he'll even do it?" Kurt asks, skeptical, but starting to undress. If nothing else, his jeans are still wet, and clinging uncomfortably to his legs.
"Because he marched in the last Pride Parade, don't you remember?" Adam picks out an outfit for himself and lays it on the bed. Then he starts yanking off his shirt and kicking off his pants almost simultaneously. "He even carried a flag."
Kurt thinks the whole thing over, the whole insane idea, pictures it in detail in his head. It was a sweet idea when he first came up with it, and it still is, but now, he feels something close to dread knot in his chest.
"But…but our family won't be there," Kurt remarks.
"Hence the for us part you previously mentioned," Adam replies.
"And, we haven't picked up the rings yet."
"We don't need rings, Kurt." Adam starts helping Kurt off with his pants when he stops undressing. "You have your engagement ring. I have mine. We'll use those for now."
"But…it won't be legal."
"So what!" Adam lifts Kurt up by the waist and spins him in a circle until the tiniest of smiles blooms on his face. "So what, so what, so what, so what! Kurt! Stop getting caught up in the details, love. It doesn't have to be anything but you and me. That's it. That's all I want. What about you?"
Kurt looks down into Adam's face, waiting for his fiancé to put him down, but Adam doesn't, prepared to wait all night with Kurt hoisted above his head if he has to.
"This is crazy," Kurt says, finally feeling relaxed enough to laugh for the first time in weeks. It seemed silly, but they were actually going through with this.
"So, is that a yes?" Adam jostles Kurt, tossing him up a bit, slipping his arms down to Kurt's hips and lifting him higher in the air. Kurt yelps, grabbing at Adam's shoulders. "Will you, Kurt Elizabeth Hummel, walk down to 9th Avenue with me, so we can get married on a street corner out in the snow? Just for us? Just you and me?"
Kurt looks at Adam, at his wonderful fiancé, completely on board with this ludicrous plan to get married in the next five minutes, secure that this is what he wants without a shadow of a doubt. That he's so absolutely in love with Kurt, things like place settings and flowers and $15,000 deposits mean nothing to him. It makes Kurt remember, for the hundredth time that day, why it is that he loves Adam as much as he does.
"Yes," Kurt says, wriggling to get down. "Yes, I'll marry you. Right now, just for us. So let's go!"