New fiction - first chapter. Hope you like it, this time they're all human!
All characters belong to Cassandra Clare - thanks for them! :D
Cut.
I'm a bastard.
Cut.
I'm not worth it.
Cut.
He is right.
Cut.
I'm nothing.
Cut.
I'm useless.
Five fresh, bloody cuts are marking my forearm. They should probably hurt, but they don't, because I don't feel them. I feel nothing. I never feel anything, I just let the words go through me and pretend that they don't reach me. Because it doesn't matter, it really doesn't. But they do. They hurt me and I feel pain.
I put the razor blade down and stare at my face in the mirror. I look awful. My cheekbones are clearly there, my eyes way too big and my face shape too feminine for a guy. He is right. I AM ugly. I am disgusting and ugly. Why haven't I noticed when I was younger? This is strange. But however, I have to go on, or somebody will notice it. Or not. Probably not, nobody ever notices if I'm there. Except for Izzy, Jace and Max - they are the only ones who care about me. Or at least they say so. I'm not entirely sure, but it gives me the strength to move on. Because they need me. Or he will hurt them, too. Or maybe not - I mean, I am the son who is out of his mind, right?
Well I guess, I'll have to go downstairs. Izzy wants to go to a party and so does Jace.
Another night out without fun.
Another lonely evening.
How fun.
So this is actually kinda depressing, but it's there to show you Alec's situation a bit. Next chapter will contain more plot and maybe some acquaintances ;)