Wow, I have no sense of focus do I? Had to write it, yadda yadda yadda. Enjoy!
Oh, and I don't own PJO.
Happy?
Athena: Frankly, yes. You would've paired Poseidon and me…
Me: Well, I do own this story so maybe I will!
Poseidon: Nice going, Owl Face.
Athena: Shut up, Fish Head.
I do not own the lyrics in this fanfiction.
I also own Sandy
It was a normal day on Mt. Olympus. The twelve gods were bored. They'd played Would You Rather, Truth Or Dare, and, their personal favorite; Watch a Drunk Dionysus Sing Retarded Songs.
"I wish somebody would give us something to do." Hades sighed.
With a poof of purple smoke, a teenage mortal was standing in front of him.
"Who the Hades are you?" Ares asked. The girl smiled in a creepy way.
"I'm Sandy, and I'm here to give you something to do!" All twelve gods leaned forward in their thrones.
"We're," She paused for dramatic effect, "Going to put on a musical!"
=o=o=o=o=o=o=o=o=o=o=o=o=o=o=o=o=o=o=o=o=o=o=o=o=o=o=o
"Why on Olympus would we do that?" Ares asked. Then he cowered under Sandy's withering glare, much to the amusement of Hephaestus and Apollo.
"Oh, okay. Because you said so. I'm cool with that." Apollo stood.
"Hang on. What musical?" Aphrodite started saying,
"Please be Phantom, Please be Phantom." Everyone looked at her.
"What?" She said, widening her blue eyes. "It's a tragic love story!"
"Beauty and the Beast. Sorry Aphrodite."
"Darn it!"
o=o=o=o=o=o=o=o=o=o=o=o=o=o=o=o=o=o=o=o=o=o=o=o=o=o=o
"Auditions are NOW! Who wants to go first?"
A voice that sounded suspiciously like Athena trying to imitate Poseidon shouted,
"I do!" Sandy pointed her finger at Poseidon, who was scowling at a very smug Athena.
"Poseidon, you first, since Athena volunteered you. Athena, you're next."
Athena groaned. Poseidon smirked.
"POSEIDON!"
"Sorry," he said meekly. Athena stifled a laugh. He snapped his fingers, and some underwatery xylophones started to play.
"The seaweed is always greener
In somebody else's lake
You dream about going up there
But that is a big mistake
Just look at the world around you
Right here on the ocean floor
Such wonderful things surround you
What more is you lookin' for?
Under the sea
Under the sea
Darling it's better
Down where it's wetter
Take it from me
Up on the shore they work all day
Out in the sun they slave away
While we devotin'
Full time to floatin'
Under the sea
Down here all the fish is happy
As off through the waves they roll
The fish on the land ain't happy
They sad 'cause they in their bowl
But fish in the bowl is lucky
They in for a worser fate
One day when the boss get hungry
Guess who's gon' be on the plate
Under the sea
Under the sea
Nobody beat us
Fry us and eat us
In fricassee
We what the land folks loves to cook
Under the sea we off the hook
We got no troubles
Life is the bubbles
Under the sea
Under the sea
Since life is sweet here
We got the beat here
Naturally
Even the sturgeon an' the ray
They get the urge 'n' start to play
We got the spirit
You got to hear it
Under the sea
The newt play the flute
The carp play the harp
The plaice play the bass
And they soundin' sharp
The bass play the brass
The chub play the tub
The fluke is the duke of soul
(Yeah)
The ray he can play
The lings on the strings
The trout rockin' out
The blackfish she sings
The smelt and the sprat
They know where it's at
An' oh that blowfish blow
Under the sea
Under the sea
When the sardine
Begin the beguine
It's music to me
What do they got? A lot of sand
We got a hot crustacean band
Each little clam here
Know how to jam here
Under the sea
Each little slug here
Cuttin' a rug here
Under the sea
Each little snail here
Know how to wail here
That's why it's hotter
Under the water
Ya we in luck here
Down in the muck here
UNDER THE SEA!"
Everybody stared at Poseidon.
"Wow. If you'd told me you could sing like that, I would've had so much more to make fun of," Athena stated casually. Poseidon looked winded, so Sandy sent him back to his seat with a "Well done". Then Sandy barked,
"ATHENA! YOU'RE NEXT." Athena got up off of her throne and started to sing something a bit slower.
I've heard there was a secret chord
That David played, and it pleased the Lord
But you don't really care for music, do you?
It goes like this
The fourth, the fifth
The minor fall, the major lift
The baffled king composing Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Your faith was strong but you needed proof
You saw her bathing on the roof
Her beauty in the moonlight overthrew you
She tied you to a kitchen chair
She broke your throne, and she cut your hair
And from your lips she drew the Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Baby I have been here before
I know this room, I've walked this floor
I used to live alone before I knew you.
I've seen your flag on the marble arch
Love is not a victory march
It's a cold and it's a broken Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah
There was a time when you let me know
What's really going on below
But now you never show it to me, do you?
And remember when I moved in you
The holy dove was moving too
And every breath we drew was Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Maybe there's a God above
But all I've ever learned from love
Was how to shoot at someone who outdrew you
It's not a cry you can hear at night
It's not somebody who has seen the light
It's a cold and it's a broken Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah
You say I took the name in vain
I don't even know the name
But if I did, well, really, what's it to you?
There's a blaze of light in every word
It doesn't matter which you heard
The holy or the broken Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah
I did my best, it wasn't much
I couldn't feel, so I tried to touch
I've told the truth, I didn't come to fool you
And even though it all went wrong
I'll stand before the Lord of Song
With nothing on my tongue but Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah
There was utter silence.
Apollo exclaimed, "She's the bestest alto I've ever heard!"
There was some scattered, wide-eyed applause, and a flushing Athena plopped into her throne unceremoniously.
Sandy cleared her throat.
"Well! That was really something! Thank you for that!"
She turned around and called the next name (Ares). The auditions continued!
OoOoOoO
(I don't want to fill this up with song lyrics, but I wanted to put Poseidon and Athena in there because….hehe…because I did!)
After the auditions, the gods dispersed, most flushing. Sandy sat in a director's chair Apollo had cheerfully conjured up.
"Hmm…I have my Belle and Beast set, so now for the others…I should cast him as him, but I really want HIM to be him…Arrrg! DIONYSUS!"
A grape scented cloud 'poofed' Dionysus into sight.
"What do you want, Sarah?"
Sandy glared. Dionysus did not flinch.
"I need your help. You see-"
Dionysus cut her off.
"You should cast him as him, and HIM as him."
Sandy stared.
"Dude, you're good. I think I'll make you…"
Please say co-director; I don't want to be in a play… Dionysus chanted.
"COGSWORTH!"
AN: Did anyone recognize Aphrodite's earlier line? Hehe…Next installment up soon, with cast! Reviewing, my friends, is a very kind act done when you read a story. So please, help the fanfiction writers one step at a time and REVIEW!