Here I was, standing outside our cozy little house. The sun was shining right on top and the birds were chirping loudly to an exquisite tune. It was a glorious day, although I barely took notice. For me it was as if these small things didn't even matter anymore.

I felt like today was like any other day- I woke up, my brothers had already gone off to school, and I was left here to clean the house and have their food on the table when they arrived.

Somehow I was ahead of schedule today, and I had a few more hours before I had to start cooking their meal. I was not used to having time for myself; the first thing on my mind every morning when I woke up was the wellbeing of my family. I was all they had, and I wouldn't break the promise I made of taking care of them, they were my top priority now.

Absently, I picked up the phone and dialed my best friend's number- or better yet, my only friend's number.

"Bella? Is that really you?" the surprised voice answered on the other line.

"Of course, who else would be calling you from my house?"

"Actually I would've thought Jake or Seth would be calling me before you did."

"What do you mean?" I told her completely oblivious to what she was saying. The idea of my 10 or 12 year old brothers calling my 20 year old friend seemed like a joke to me.

There was a silence. She waited almost half a minute and cleared her throat before speaking again.

"Bella, we haven't talked in months. You never returned my calls and about 2 months ago I stopped trying."

Then it hit me. What had I done? The only friend I had – the only person that cared for me all this time, that helped me go through the period where my parents passed away and left me alone to take care of my two brothers – was Alice. And together with everyone else I had ever met, I excluded her completely from life. What had I turned into, I thought completely horrified.

"How long has it been…" I trailed off.

"10 months…" I could hear the worry in her voice, "Bella are you alright?"

10 months, I thought. Meaning she had spent 8 months trying to do everything in her power to get me out of the state I was in after my parents died in that car accident. 8 months where I pushed her away without even noticing.

"Alice, I'm so…" and then I stopped. I had no right to apologize; she would never forgive me for what I did to her. She had already given up on me, and I wouldn't make her suffer again. "I have to go." I said hanging up the phone.

I had to do something. I was not sure what, but I couldn't stay at home, I had to leave. I went to get my purse and then I stopped again. How long had it been since I last left the house? I couldn't remember. It's as if I had been completely absorbed in a world that didn't exist. I didn't know who I was anymore.

I slowly sank into the ground and started weeping. I didn't know for how long I stayed like this, it was already getting dark when I heard a soft knock on the front door.

"Bella?" a high musical voice said after opening the door which as usual was unlocked, "May I come in?"

I looked up, and met the deep blue eyes of my tiny pale best friend. I began studying her, realizing how much I had missed in my absence. Her short black spiky hair had grown out, and it was now past her shoulders. Her perfect face also seemed different in a mysterious way, but I was still too wrapped up in my wallow to understand what had changed.

I didn't know what I would look like to her, but something told me it was not anything positive from the look she was giving me.

"What have you done to yourself?" Alice asked in disbelief.

She offered me her hand, and I took it, slowly standing up from the floor in my room. I turned around, and looked at my reflection in my full length mirror for the first time in 10 months. At first, I didn't recognize myself.

The girl staring back at me was too thin. It seemed like all the bones inside her body were visible, they looked easily breakable. Her skin was practically translucent; as if she were locked up in an abyssal her entire life. Below her eyes there were deep dark circles that looked as if they had been carved there. After registering all of this I sank right back into the ground.

"Alice" I pleaded, "Help me."

My friend's bewildered gaze changed to panic. She sank by my side and embraced me tightly in her arms. Somehow her comforting only made it worse, my tears broke out and soon the sobbing began without any warning to stop.

"Shush, Bella." She said softly, rocking me backwards and forwards.

I couldn't believe that after shutting the door on her face repeatedly for 8 months she would still forgive me and come back into my life. I decided it was time to let it all out, let someone in on my misery, and there was no one that seemed to be better for the job than my best friend.

"I'm so mad at them" I began while the angry tears ran down my face, "My life was settled. That internship on CNN was going to be so good for my career! Now, all I have planned for my future is becoming a full time nanny and owning an inheritance of almost half a million dollars. They forced me to accept this, and they know I couldn't possibly live with myself if I didn't keep my promise."

"Honey, you're being unreasonable" she told me now looking a little angry herself, "do you really think your parents would have wanted you to be unhappy? They wanted you to take care of your family but they also wanted you to do what you love. You could try and do both, you know."

I had always been the one who did the comforting. Alice had a very low self esteem and I was the one who constantly told her to believe in herself, that she could one day be the designer she aspired to be. I never thought it had really worked, but I kept trying because I knew one day she would see for herself.

I looked at her face for a moment, and I could see that it was filled with concern for me. I was finally able to see what was different about her- she had hope in her eyes. Maybe she could see it for herself now, I thought suddenly eyeing her with suspicion.

"Something happened to you." I told her trying to hold back my tears.

"How did you know?" She gave me an astonished look and quickly stood up, still facing me.

"I know you too well, Al." I said smiling a little.

She looked at me for a second, and then her expression became tender. She sat down beside me again and squeezed me into a hug.

"I forgot about that" she released me and suddenly took my hands and held them tightly, now looking at me with a determination I rarely saw on her face, "We're going to figure this out together. You're my best friend, Bella, you have always been there for me, it's time for me to be the strong one and do something for you."

She then pursed her lips and looked at the walls deep in thought. I tried saying something but she interrupted me by lifting a finger. After a minute or two she let out a deep sigh.

"Ok, you're not going to like this, but I think it's best if you live with me for a while." I was about to protest but she interrupted me again, "I have a spare bedroom, we can share the rent. My parents can take care of Jacob and Seth for a month or two while you sort things out. I think it would be best if you tried out for that internship again, and this time you are not going to reject it, do you understand me?"

I was still trying to absorb everything she had said. Her offer was very tempting, I knew that it would be the best thing for me to do right now, but what about the rest of the family? It wouldn't be completely irresponsible to leave my brothers with Alice's parents. Carlisle and Esme were already like family to us, and they were always talking about adopting children, they were amazing people. I thought for a second and decided. Yes, I could trust them.

I couldn't understand how I let all of it get that far. If I had let Alice help me in the first place I wouldn't be in this state right now. I would still be in college, and I would definitely be doing great in my internship.

I closed my eyes taking a deep breath, and then opened them again. When I looked back towards Alice, I couldn't help feeling a bit of hope myself.

"Let's do it."

Hope you guys enjoyed it! Please tell me what you think, if you like it I'll post the next chapter... and guess who will be in it??